A part time writer and a video game lover, I plan to write and read crossovers. If I could ever not be as lazy as I am...
The elements of harmony, one of the most powerful forces in Equestria. Loyalty, Honesty, Kindness, Laughter, Generosity, and Magic. With these many an obstacle have been overcome, and many foes stopped. But can these elements, this powerful force, face one of its own?
Can the bearers face: The element of loyalty?
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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How about.... BRING RD BACK AND HAVE HER KICK THAT METAL BASTARDS ASS TO THE ENDS OF EQUESTRIA! I liked it in other words.
3893645 he he he, thanks, and i might have made metal RD a little too cruel but, then again metal sonic was just as brutal when fighting sonic.
3895405 I know. Again though I say you should bring her back as well for a re-match in which she wins.
3895608 ill have to augment her, partly cause she has gotten her whole body shattered (figuratively speaking), and because it'll just be cooler
3896499 You sir win the internet. Cyber Dash vs. Metal Dash. Dis Gon B Gud.
No info on where this thing came from, or why it was going around killing, or anything. We have no clue to the motivations of it (assuming it has any) or its maker, so what was the point? For that matter, who made it and how?
Either both should be hyphenated, or neither. Be consistent. Also, that second use of "half" shouldn't be capitalized.
When the word "princess" is being used as a title that's part of her name, it needs to be capitalized as well: "Princess Twilight Sparkle".
Loose = the opposite of tight.
Lose = the opposite of win.
If she's only just now getting exhausted after an hour, I wouldn't call that very quickly. That's incredible endurance.
Her name needs to be capitalized.
That needs to say "I'm". It's a contraction (short for "I am"), and contractions have apostrophes in them. Also, the personal pronoun "I" is always capitalized.
Another contraction missing an apostrophe: "won't".
This needs work.
4886845 never was good at writing stuff
but thank you for pointing out the errors, and believe me I make millions of them.
Also are you implying I should write a prequel?
4889412
A prequel? No. I'm saying that there should be background presented in this story.
4890920 I was kidding about making a prequel, and could you also go over my sequel to this (which i think is worse) I'm sure you'll find many more things to correct there.