This fic is inspired by the story is a combination of "AC The Equestrian War" and "Scootaloo Dileamm"
This story is a prelude to the invasion Equestria by two nations. The prolude revolves around Scootaloo an home less orphan that became the first Shadowbolt captain and gave rise to a new land and nation called "The New Lunar Republic or the NLR".
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Double-check your chapter for spelling. I see a significant number of spelling errors that a spell checker can't notice, one of which being the constant misspelling of Sweetie Belle's name.
You should also learn to add more detail, as this chapter is almost completely dialogue. Such a thing only works if it was specifically intended to be dialogue-only. Click here to read FiMFiction's writing guide. It will help.