Fic recs, January 8th: Midnight29 edition! · 12:40am Jan 9th, 2020
Because current new reader Midnight29 reads (mostly) short one-shots, it's the perfect situation for me to kick out a bunch of reviews all at once. :) This isn't everything she's done, but it is rather the bulk of them.
Also note, there's a couple people named 'Ben' who she credits in various readings, often without further identification, so I did a lot of guessing on her collaborators. :B
H: 2 R: 5 C: 10 V: 2 N: 5
Pinkie Pie Waits for the Doctor by SilverStar7
Reading by Midnight29, Benjamin Ylisirkka and Alex
Genre: Comedy?
And Pinkie is not good at waiting for anything.
While Pinkie Watches Paint Dry did this idea better, I can't fault the author for approaching it from another angle. What I can fault them for is not knowing when to stop. Finding out it's only been 3 minutes and Pinkie's passed out on the floor is funny; having the doctor and nurse shrug because they don't know how it could have happened would have been a great place to end it. The actual ending is pretty funny, but what gets us there is a long, drawn-out medical drama that made me wonder if I hadn't stumbled into a completely different fic than I was expecting. When you're dealing with stories this short, you can't afford to waste time building up to what is not the main joke, and the main joke is "Pinkie hates waiting". I just wanted this to be funnier than it was. :/
Not Recommended
The Knight in Shining Armor by Obselescence
Reading by Midnight29 and Phoenix Rising
Genre: Slice of Life
On the cusp of attaining his life's dream, Shining Armor has to ask himself: is he ready to join the guard?
Huh, Obs must have taken this one down in the last five years. c.c At least we still have the reading! This is a surprisingly simple story given how deeply it delves into Shining's character and backstory. After laying out the path that takes him to the Royal Guard academy, the bulk of it is presented as a conversation with Princess Celestia about just what Shining will be giving up when he finally becomes a guard. It's gripping, intense even.
Recommended
Hearts and Hooves Day by Bluebirdd065
Reading
Genre: Cute
Dinky prepares a surprise for her mommy on Hearts and Hooves Day.
This was sweet, and extremely cute. I could have done without the poor, pathetic Derpy bit, myself. I mean, you don't need to bring her low in order to have a caring surprise like this hit home with the reader. Plus, y'know, it's nothing we haven't seen before. But I like the significance the holiday has, that was new.
Recommended for Fans of Derpy and Dinky
Monster. by Shy Marble Pie
Reading
Genre: Sad
The monster is coming for Applejack.
Looks like the author DFE'd at some point. So I'm not sure how coy this story was really trying to be; I kind of figured the 'monster' was one of her family, and I also had a feeling I knew why she was hiding from them. I was right, and this turned out to be a touching story about family. It also… exists to explain one of the better jokes made at Applejack's expense in the show? I'm not sure that was really necessary, nor did it quite fit at the end. Also, the writing has some issues, mostly Applejack's constant describing of herself; made me think the author wasn't used to writing in first person. Also, that poem at the beginning is, uh, really emo, for lack of a better term. Still, this wasn't bad, and was fairly unique, to boot.
Recommended for Apple Family Fans
Servants of the Night by Jay David
Reading
Genre: Episode Followup
Two of Princess Nightmare Moon's castle staff discuss their monarch's recent setback.
This has some interesting ideas in it, but the writing needs work. It's extremely telly, the opening especially, where we're given every last detail of The Cutie Re-Mark. But I like the idea that Rarity and Rainbow would still end up being friends. They even talk about how they were able to achieve their ambitions under Nightmare Moon's rule, which is a pretty fascinating and dark concept. But, they have nothing to compare to, so it's not explored terribly deeply. This was, on balance, just okay.
Recommended for Canon AU Fans Only
Stare Down of the Century by Tavish
Reading by Midnight29 and Zethis
Genre: Random Comedy
Twilight and Shining Armor have a little contest.
Man, these dead accounts start comin' and they don't stop comin', amirite? :/ Well, this piece was pretty lacking, all things considered. It's not particularly funny, there is a definite word usage issue, and there are a lot of spots that made me wonder about characterization. I mean, Shining saying 'turd'? Not to mention Twilight makes an Arrow reference, and then is called out for doing so. What even? Not sure what was going on here.
Not Recommended
A Mare's Best Friend…? by Ditz
Reading
Genre: Random Comedy
Pinkie reunites Rarity with a forgotten friend.
Talk about running a joke into the ground. I mean, it's a story with Rarity and Maud, who do you think the 'forgotten friend' is going to be? I had a couple small chuckles (rock sanctuary, heh), but overall found this wanting.
Vaguely Recommended
Just a Bad Colt by LightningSword
Reading by Midnight29 and AJ Pony
Genre: Anti-Bullying PSA
Stormy Night thought getting his cutie mark would make things better at school. But they just made things worse…
This story is heartbreaking. Through a combination of bullying, an inattentive teacher and just plain depression, Stormy Night moves from being a troubled colt to a 'bad' one. We get to watch him internalize the things other ponies say about him, and lash out because, despite it not being true, he feels like he has no one to turn to or care about him. Nevertheless, I appreciate that this doesn't end in tragedy, because it shows us how important kindness really is. Not every broken kid comes from a broken household; some are just unlucky.
Highly Recommended
Mother May I? by Moabite
Reading
Genre: Poor, Pathetic Derpy
Derpy explains her condition to her daughter.
I usually use that tag as a condemnation. To be sure, this is a story about Derpy having problems with her eyes, getting frustrated at herself, and being laughed at openly by other ponies; all sure signs of a writer going for a least common denominator to tug at the heartstrings. And yet, the way she explains herself to Dinky makes me feel at least some of that emotion is come by honestly. Plus, their scenes together are cute as heck, and you can't say no to that. So this was all right.
Recommended for Derpy and Dinky Fans
Gotta Catch'em All by StrawberryParfait
Reading
Genre: Random/Adventure
Rarity and Applejack travel to Neighpon to complete their list.
This is another one of those cases where you gotta wonder how the reader found the dang story, because it's the only one they posted, it didn't get a lot of attention, and they disappeared little more than a month later. Anyway, the idea here is invoking Pokemon catchphrases to entice the reader to wonder just what it is best ship is trying to accomplish. The answer is considerably less goofy than you might think, meaning the setup is actually suitably straightforward. It's not trying to put you off the trail before unloading a huge joke, in other words. It's still an odd duck, and I'm not quite sure why it was written, but it's a decent little oddity.
Recommended If You Want Something Different
In All but Name by SPark
Reading
Reading by Luvlessi
Reading by Lotus Moon
Genre: Cute
Celestia celebrates Mother's Day.
In many ways, I was unpleasantly surprised by this piece. I mean, Celestia mooning over the fact that she's never had a foal? Traditional gender roles in Equestria's celebration of Mother's Day? That doesn't seem right. But I can't be too hard on this, because Twilight's role is simply adorable and gave me the good chemicals.
Recommended If You Like Cute Stuff
A Winter Walk by Scribblestick
Reading by Midnight29 and her little brother
Genre: Slice of Life
Twilight and Spike go for a walk in the snow.
You ever read a story that's just calm? Tranquil? This is one. The imagery is strong, and the pacing languid so we can enjoy what's going on. The centerpiece is an encounter with a pack of wolves — regular ones, not timber — the reaction to which is rather unexpected. Beyond that, this is just a quiet, cute piece about Twilight and Spike talking about nothing in particular, and even that is used effectively.
Recommended
The Prince and the Enchanting Moon by Black Ultron
Reading by Midnight29, Lenerd and Neko Pie
Genre: Humanized Shipping
Though he knew better, Prince Sombra let the injured woman into his life.
I really want the main problem with this story to be that it's a very standard romance, but it's actually that these are just people named Sombra and Luna with no connection to the show characters. The romance and the telly way this is written is done in the name of crafting a fable with a strong message. The theme sledgehammer might be in play here, but this was a good bit better than I initially gave it credit for.
Recommended If You Like Humanized AUs
The Wrong Side of History by Orbiting Kettle
Reading
Genre: Random Comedy
Twilight thinks she deserves an assassination attempt, too.
This intensely silly piece was a laugh a minute. Luna's role is particularly well managed, and the whole manages to be snippy and fun. A good time!
Recommended
Dark and Deep by arcum42
Reading by Midnight29 and Benjamin Ylisirkka
Genre: Horror
Dinky knew better than to go into the Everfree Forest. She ended up there anyway…
I'm calling it a good thing that, for most of this story, I wasn't sure whether the stallion Dinky encounters in the forest was a cannibal or a child molester. (Spoilers: he's probably not the latter.) That kept the tension and creep factor high. And, for more spoilers, the ending is pretty dark, but I can't fault this for being sufficiently spoopy.
Recommended
Where Does Magic Come From? by Berry Delight
Reading
Genre: Comedy
With Tirek defeated and a new castle in Ponyville, Twilight Sparkle has just one question.
I was expecting something meta here, a nod to toylines or such, which would have been fine. This instead took a much better comedic route and dredged up some frankly intriguing theories. I mean, I had forgotten at least one name dropped in this story, and the parallels it draws across its cockamamie idea are fantastic and only add to the hilarity. This was really fun!
Recommended
The Most Successful Assassination of Princess Celestia by Foals Errand
Reading
Genre: Dark Comedy
It involved ninjas and dart guns.
Holy crap, this story has 11k views and over a thousand likes, and it's been around for just over 3 years! :O I can see the appeal; I don't think I've ever equated "dark comedy" and "adorable" before. That said, it does overplay its hand with a lengthy denouement that tries to jam in a bunch of extra jokes. Some of them were good, but things like the explanation for why this happened in the first place weren't really necessary. Still, a bit of harmless fun.
Recommended for Laughs
Christmas in Equestria by Namechanger
Reading
Genre: Holiday Special/Poem
This was published a year before Hearth's Warming Eve, so that explains why ponies are celebrating Christmas. It does not, however, explain what happened to this poem. I mean, normally I would commend an author for sticking with a solid meter, but not when it meant coming up with this many tortured rhymes. I'm talking non-sequiturs, nonsensical saidisms: you name it, it's there. I spent the whole reading making barfing faces, because unlike fanfic or music, I'd rather have no poetry than bad poetry, and this was just awful. D:
Not Recommended
"Celestia"'s New Year's Resolutions by ShadowStrike11
Reading by Midnight29 and Thunder Rider
Reading by Lotus Moon
Genre: Random Comedy
Luna finds them rather strange.
This was incredibly silly, and unfortunately, the art in the reading gave away the punchline, which can't be said to be the author's fault, at least. Other criticisms include explaining various jokes and general inanity. I laughed at maybe one thing.
Not Recommended
I'll Be There by JadeEmberly
Reading by Midnight29 and Thunder Rider
Genre: Friendshipping
Whenever Fluttershy needs him, all she has to do is call Discord's name.
Hey, something on FFN! O.o This is probably just actual shipping, but it holds back enough that it doesn't have to be if you don't want. What it certainly is is saccharine as all get-out. I found myself just wanting it to get done with things, already, because I definitely got the point after a while. Might be worth it if you like Fluttercord, Discord being a good friend, and/or Angel Bunny getting his just desserts.
Vaguely Recommended
Silver Tongue Tricksters by RarityEQM
Reading
Reading by VisualPony
Genre: Comedy
Trixie needs her cape mended. Unfortunately, that means visiting Rarity.
This is a pretty simple piece about Trixie swallowing her pride while Rarity gives her a mild roasting. It's good character work. The surprising thing was the background Twixie; it's just dropped in there like it's no big thing, I was really blindsided! But otherwise, had it not been for that, I would have assumed this was season seven fic. It works!
Recommended for Trixie Fans
Pegasus by Grand_Moff_Pony
Reading by Midnight29 and another Midnight
Genre: EQG
I wonder what it would be like to fly without an airplane…
I spend so much time focused on stories about Sunset being a pony in a human body that I often fail to consider the effect her existence has on her other friends. This is an excellent piece about human Rainbow Dash pondering what life is like for the her across the mirror while awaiting takeoff. I found this an absolute pleasure to read, just solid introspection from a character who rarely gets a chance to introspect.
Highly Recommended
The Apple Seed Store by Coyotek4
Reading
Genre: Monty Python Ponification
Applejack attempts to buy some apple seeds.
They always say, if you're gonna steal, steal from the best, but… Not only does the Cheese Shop Sketch already exist as a timeless piece of comedy, this is a complete plagiarism of it. I mean, it's forthright about being so, but literally, AJ and the shopkeeper use the exact same dialogue as in the original sketch, just with cheese replaced by apples. Points to the author for looking up so many varieties, but I cannot in good conscience suggest anyone give this their time. Just go watch Monty Python.
Not Recommended
"Mystery" by TimeBomb0
Reading
Reading by Agent0Fluffy
Genre: Noir Parody
This is really fun, for as short as it is. A solid noir narrator voice for Spike, who's anything but the detective he fancies himself to be. Noir is always about delivery, and this gets it right, even if it's just joking around. :)
Recommended for Laughs
Ah, yes, that Grand Moff Pony one is a good 'un.
On the other hand, I couldn't have had a more opposite reaction to "Just a Bad Colt." I found it to be full of contrived sad-sack moments and generally implausible.
I'm sorry Pinkie Pie Waits for the Doctor wasn't what you were looking for. I was trying to go for something over the top in the middle so that the comedic ending would have more of a punch. I'll concede, I think I did drag it out too long - a short burst of drama would have been better. That's one of my older fics (over 5 years now!? where does the time go...) but while I know I could do it better today, it is the first one of mine that someone ever did a reading for. For that reason, it does hold a special place for me.
Thank you for taking the time to review another one of my stories. It's unfortunate that the three stories of mine you've reviewed have been comedies. I feel that comedy is my weakest genre, even though those are some of my most popular works. Comedy or otherwise, I do hope I'll be able to earn a solid recommendation from you one of these days.
Best wishes!
5182832
That's kind of what I thought you might have been going for, and this would have been better, yes. No shame in your older stories not being up to snuff, though. :)
I freely confess that I wrote "In all But Name" 100% solely to troll somebody who was rather rude on the topic of hating and loathing the trope that treats Celestia as a mother-figure to Twilight.
The fact that a lot of people love it both startled and a bit dismayed me, tbh. It's not a great story, it's not even a good story. It's a story that does one thing only, present Twilight as a cute foal who sees Celestia as a mother figure. Why that's so popular I still sometimes wonder. I guess "cute" is sometimes all it takes?
5182910
Okay, this makes a ton more sense. Because the things I pointed out as 'unpleasant surprises' were mostly along the lines of "SPark is a good writer, why the heck is she doing this?"
Heh, glad you like my silly, little story. Laughter was indeed all I could hope for. And thank you for the review.
I remember really enjoying Pegasus. Moff is one of those writers who maybe doesn't quite have the name recognition of the very top tier (in fame terms) but whose stories I reliably like.
5183123
Awww, you're too kind my friend!
5182802
Thank you so much!
And same to you, Present! I'm so glad you enjoyed the story. :)
To be fair, this story was kinda rushed! Did it in under a week! Though I'm surprised it's even as remotely as entertaining to you as it ended up being. For context, this was done during the time I just wanted to pump stuff out and... well, given what little there was to be said, it shows.
In any case, thanks for reading. I haven't checked on the story since I released it years ago, so I appreciate you bringing it back to a spotlight of sorts.
5183385
You're welcome. :)
Oh hey, my colab with mids got a high rating 👌
Actually knew the author at the time (not sure what became. Heard some things even I still plan to, edventualy, finish the pride of the apples reading)
Either way, even for an older thing, I still find bad colt as one of my more proudest production still ^^’ I think a lot had to do with how I was able to focus some of my frustrations I was dealt with as a kid into the audio