Answers, and MOAR! · 5:09am Mar 1st, 2013
Answers to the Questions I've gotten so far. Feel free to ask moar!
First I'd like to apologize for my fans. They don't seem to share your enthusiasm for direct interrogation. The answer, clearly, is that Morgrad wills it. Although last time I checked I wasn't a faggit. Though these things are known to change. Still, my answer is the same. Morgrad.
Ooh. Multiple parts. Let's have at them! My name? Well, that's got two answers. On here, I am known by my Pen Name of Jet Howitzer. A name that I was provided by my brother several years ago when I wanted to change my gamertag on X-Box Live. And, yes, that is my current tag. My real name is Philip Johnson. Philip Alexander Johnson, to be thorough. My quest? A simple answer will suffice. I seek an education. And with a current GPA of 3.5 out of 4 I'd say I'm doing a fine job. Third: It really depends on what kind of swallow it is. African or European. The answer for a European Swallow is, though, roughly 11 meters per second, or 24 MPH. The answer to the ultimate question of life, the universe and everything else? Simple. 42.
Easily the most badass animal alive. I mean, come on! Look at it! How can you even think that it's NOT awesome. How would I describe it, though? Easy. Morgrad doesn't hate them.
Depends on my financial situation. (Read as not likely unless it's really close to where I live.)
Hey, I'm not that old. But yes, I do think I'll make it another year.
Thank you, I made it myself. Hooray for rudimentary artistic talent! To answer your question, no. But I've been sorely tempted many times.
Probably won't do that. Not because I have a problem with that kind of romance, but because I don't know how the hell to write a lesbian romance. I could do an orgy, but I couldn't do believable romance. If you're looking for something of that persuasion, though, I suppose I could try writing something just so you could all laugh at how awful it is.
Not bad, actually. Thanks for asking.
I can't actually slap a pony. Question is moot.
An ethical conundrum! I like it. I wouldn't hire either of them until I called up their references. If they're truly equal in skill I'd go beyond that to see how they fare under duress, and how they act with their coworkers. I'd also see how they relate to me. I don't want to hire someone who won't be able to talk to me, or their coworkers, without having problems. To summarize, I don't really know. If they were equal in all ways I'd hire the white guy. Not because I have a problem with black people, but because I work with only black people now, and I'd rather have a bit more diversity... Yeah, that came out more racist than I thought it would...
I had some hope that I'd get some real questions. I was surprised to see as many as I got.
Oh, this one's actually kind of easy. This guy's profile pic. I'm going to write a story about that picture.
These ideas come from the dark recesses of my mind. I wouldn't say that they come from nowhere, but they do just seem to pop up in my mind from time to time. Often I get inspiration from a picture, or a picture. Hell, I even get some ideas from other people's stories I read. SFC Ponycron, for instance, inspired the start of the Nameless Romance Series. Kody910 also inspired me to do quite a bit of writing. Crowley is another big one.
Favorite type of fanfic... Romance. But it has to be well written. Bad grammar, or poor plot, is a major turn off for me. I'll never give up before finishing the first chapter, but if the plot is bad, or it has awful grammar, I'll just drop it right then and there. I also enjoy reading anything written by the people I am watching. I may not read it all when it first comes out, but if I'm watching you, and you've written something, I'll read it eventually. Real life stories is a different matter entirely. I am a huge sci-fi fan, and an even bigger fantasy fan.
I'd start with my feet. Then the shins. After that I don't really know where I'd go next. Probably left arm. After that would be my upper leg. Don't really like to think about that kind of thing, though.
I actually got some gas today. $39 dollars later and I've got a full tank. But I do still have money left over, so yes. I have $5 for gas.
Sweet Jesus... I wish. Fireflies. Easy choice. After that would be I Would Give to You, Faux Pas, The Color of Apples, Rising Sun. I just really like Icarus as a character, and he's the one based the most after me. Besides, all the rest of them have so much shit to deal with... It's really not a nice life that they lead for most of it.
This has no bearing on the outcome of the story. Honestly, I don't really know. Probably Twilight. She's the one that I feel is like me enough that I would get along with her without any real problems, but she's also different enough that it wouldn't get boring. Icarus will definitely have Twilight by the end of the story.
It's written up to chapter 30 something. Can't remember, and I'm too lazy to go look. It's pretty much as I feel like releasing the chapters. As for finishing it... When I get around to it.
Really? That's your question? (Sigh...) Fine. It would take light 508 picoseconds to travel the length of my penis in a vacuum. I'll leave the math to you.
My mother's homemade, from scratch, lasagna. That stuff is fucking delicious! I left work, on my half hour break, just to go home and have it.
[sarcasm]No. What would make you think I like ponies.[/sarcasm]
Friendship. Ponies is just a way to represent a sentient being. Friendship is something that transcends such physical limitations.
It would take light 752 picoseconds to travel through a length of fiber optics the length of my penis. Again, I'll trust you to do the math.
Never played Final Fantasy. I don't like my RPG games to railroad me. That's why I prefer open world games in the strain of Morrowind, or Skyrim. My favorite color is urrrnge. It's the most badass shade of orange. It's pronounced urrrnge. Easy, see. I have never heard of Chumawumba. Nor do I want to. I have written small blurbs for myself, but nothing really worth pursuing. I never really had the drive to write anything more than a few hundred words in length. Heh... Now I'm doing 4K and up. The progress, when I look at it, surprises me.
No, actually, I don't. I do believe in aliens, but I don't think that you are their king. Or that you're even one king amongst countless.
That's all I've got so far. Feel free to keep pelting me with questions, and I'll keep answering them. Still no off limits questions. Hit me with whatever you've got, and I'll answer.
AVANTE!
-Jet Howitzer
Hey Philip, or Phil if you don't mind. I'm Alec. Nice to make your acquaintance. I'm on XBOX Live as well, under, wait for it.......Lucky 424
One final question, if the answer to the ultimate question of life, the universe, and everything else is 42..........that what is the question?
Haven't played FF either. Being a Kingdom Hearts fan exposed me to it's weirdness and pointiness and too-many-belt-buckles-ness. Overdressing seems to be an RPG staple. Besides, The World Ends with You is best RPG.
Do you ever learn a new word and immediately have a burning desire to use it?
If my memory of a picosecond and light in a vacuum is correct, your penis is approximately 6 inches in length
(I hope I got that right, I love physics and would make me dreadfully sad to get that wrong from my mental math
)
876681 Physics is my waifu. And yes, you're right. Hooray for math.
876693 Indeed, hooray for math
(I once wanted to be an engineer who also majored in Math
.... now I am working to be a pharmacist... damn it, I want to go back ; ;
)
As a fellow Sci-Fi fan, perhaps you can advise. If I wanted to make a crossover fic, should I write the ponified version of Rendezvous with Rama or of the Foundation Series?
876693
Math.
Mental Abuse To Humans.
if the mane six some how magically transported into your house and was stuck there for like forever, how would you react?
Wait, Jet's telling everyone his penis size?
To the comments!!!
Yay for being lazy...
Oh, and if everyone (all 2 people) is just going to start posting their Xbox Live Gts, might as well post mine: DHR ZUKA
Which came first, the chicken or the egg?
What is the WORST possible thing?
do u even lift?
And where exactly in the world are you and/or Waldo?
Because I feel like asking an actual question (I'm such a jerk):
Any tips for others just getting started on the path of fanfiction writing?
Chimie cherry or cherry chonga.?
hot or cold?
boxers or briefs..?
Jet,
If I gave you an idea for a story, would you possibly use it?
Well hell, you answered my question. Tip my hat to you sir, I appreciate it.
Will you marry me...
in friendship!?
What would you be wiling to do to survive?
I fucked the math a bit, but 15cm or so?
876726 Oh hey look I'm not Darkwing! You're still getting a recommendation from me though
Personally, I'd love to see a ponified version of Rendezvous with Rama, so that would get my vote; but hey! You're the author! and if you don't pick up RwR I may have a crack at it :P
877383 To be honest I already wrote a small prologue because the prospect excited me so, but alas, I am an inexperienced writer who is bad with details and has a severe lack of free time. Perhaps I will give it a more serious shot--I was simply fishing for encouragement when writing my question to Jet up there.
Yeah being on a desert island just sucks in general
If you cut a crumb in half, do you have 2 crumbs?
Or 2 halves of a crumb?
My name is often stated as Kalreas, however my real name is Jeffery Wallace.
Nice to meet you, real name. Now:
I have a question that seems important to me.
You may recognize my name.
Yeah.
Hi. Been a long time.
Trust me, I am making progress on stories still.
Slowly but surely. I'm sorry for the wait.
However, my question.
How do you write these situations in your stories so seemingly effortlessly? I can't seem to write any good heartwarming or funny moments in any of my stories, and I think it's just my mind setting that I only see things on a serious side when I write. I can't think of anything funny or smart or anything, and when I do, and I get on the PC to write it, it goes from my head as another serious concept or thing-to-say interrupts me.
I just feel that I need multiple people to help me write. Maybe I do. I need a better reputation so I can meet people and get them to help me...
But I have no one. I'm all by my serious, depressed lonesome when I write, and I can't seem to write any funny dialogue or describe any heart-warming moment very easily. How do you do it?
Have you ever had a sick, twisted, and strange fantasy about yourself with the mane 6?
If so, care to describe it to us?
Adam has ten apples that cost $7 each, and he left his car in the Stop 'n' Shop parking lot. His car is worth $55,000 and his mother smokes weed in it. Using this information, calculate the mass of the sun.
#everyalgebraexamever
879661 We can use parallax, and the two vantage points offered by the mother and son to determine the size of the sun. Since we know the distance to the sun is about 93,000,000 miles we can deduce the diameter of the sun to be 864,300 miles, give or take a bit. Since the composition of the sun can be determined based on spectroscopy we can assume a uniform density. From this, we have everything we need to figure out the mass is 4.384x10^30 lbs. Glad I could help.
879423 Nope. I mean, other than what I've already written.
879319 Effortlessly? Pfft. No. It often takes me quite a while to get started on something. I have dozens of ideas that I've ended up tossing out simply because I didn't like how they were going. You only see the product of my writing, and I try to make sure that what I provide is of the highest quality I can produce. But if you need/want help on a more regular basis, PM me, and I'll see if I can lend a hand.
878980 2 Crumbs. Conservation of matter ignores crumbs.
877258 Yeah, approximately.
877231 I'd punt a baby. Well, actually, I'd do that just for laughs. But I'd do it srs face if I had to survive.
877222 Depends on your gender. Marriage is srs bsns. Even friendship marriage.
876989 Why wouldn't I?
876934 Maybe. Depends on what you're willing to do to give me motivation.
876861 There is not one question mark in there, so I can't answer it.
876824 Oooooh.... This would take forever to answer. PM me, and I'll give you advice. I don't feel like taking up a page with just advice.
876807 1. The egg. Laid by an almost-but-not-quite chicken. 2. Dying. And running out of ideas for stories. 3. No. I'm too lazy. 4. I'm in New Jersey (Go ahead, laugh. It can't be all bad, since I'm from there.) And Waldo is dead. He died years ago.
876768 I'd probably face palm for a few minutes. I mean, seriously, why to me? I'm an awful host. After that I'd probably teach them about the world, and give them the option of leaving, and exploring. I won't keep them here against their wills.
876726 Foundation. I love that series. Is good books.
876635 What is 6x7?
879823 I've just woken up at 1050 GMT. I saw your reply, and now I in a very good mood.
You sir, have just made my day!!!
879823 hehe don't know. Best of luck Howitzer