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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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I have no idea of what to think about this. I see trouble coming for the next chapters.
6491001 Things are moving. Liking the flow so far?
6491243 Yes, I am. I like the crossover with your other story. The one with the pony virus. I like Pinkie's part of it with her three new friends.
this these too story's are intertwining so nicely this is really getting hot.
Unnoticed by either, the silver shape in the sky drew closer, drawn by unseen forces. Though it had been forgotten, it had not forgotten them.
wonder what this is going to lead to?
and was pinkie really with Silvers foal? I am guessing only time will tell.
Harts Fire
I kinda feel like I'm missing some story. Is the encounter Twi had with this disease in another story or just an event that is referenced?
6492188 It starts here: http://www.fimfiction.net/story/265511/113/one-step-two-step-three-hoof-four-dead/113---finding-answersclop
6492448 Over 200k? Well now, that's gonna take awhile to catch up with.
6492468 I meant that chapter specifically and a few following it.
6492612 Perhaps, but I find these chapters to be like chips. You can never have just one.
I've been meaning to start One Step, but busy keeps happening.
It is indeed strange that he's kept his form for so long, spells like that don't typically last long without being fed, and it's obvious he's not intentionally feeding it...
Keep going! ;)
6493276 Which spell?
6493685 non-permanent physical alteration. For spells that are more than mere glamour, the replaced/altered parts are usually kept in stasis somewhere, and that costs energy.
Of course, you being the author allows you discretion, but I'd like to think Silver isn't permanently altered...
6494040 He shan't remain an earth pone forever, even if he makes a handsome one.
"Lest" Pinkie return.
Using "press" right after "pressure" sounds awkward. I'd change that to "put" instead.
Delete that second quotation mark.
I think that "Sisterhooves Social" needs to be capitalized.
End that sentence with a question mark, rather than a period.
There are two spaces between "to" and "burn."
6498613 Just so you know. I am on the way back from the store, and we'll put in all of your fixes soon.
Presumably that wraps up this sub-arc...though that last line is worrisome. What could it be?
It's nice to see that Pinkie and Silver made up, but I'm rather surprised they didn't even mention how she's got a bun in the oven now (I just know there's a joke to be made there, what with her love of sweets and all). The only implication regarding that was that she's an "honorary" member of their herd now...which strikes me as a bad idea. Being part of their herd, honorary or not, means that she's essentially married to all of them, primarily Silver. Which, in other words, means that they can legitimately have sex without it being an affair (though that distinction is largely technical at this point).
To be fair, it doesn't seem like that's in the cards for the immediate future, as Silver and Pinkie seem to have gone back to just thinking of each other as friends, but that's not the point. The point is that, for the next nine months (if all goes well) there's one less barrier between Silver and Pinkie starting a relationship. That's not what you want when the goal is for them to go back to their prior feelings of "friendship, not attraction." The proper course of action would have been to make sure she knew she'd have all of their love and support, but not to make her an honorary wife.
...why do I think that this is going to throw a major monkey wrench into Rainbow Dash and Applejack's current relationship issues? After all, they had a big brouhaha about having Silver stud for them, which didn't end up working. Now he studded for Pinkie by accident...that's like being poor, and having an already-rich friend win the lottery on a lark. I doubt this will be casually overlooked.
Moving on, the scene with Shei was quite sweet. Silver was showing a great deal of insight and empathy to have her speak about the merits of sisterhood. He's right to see her as one half of a pair of sisters, since that really is how she comes across.
I'm not sure what to say with regard to Twilight being apparently immune to fire. I get the thematic connection, but it seems kinda...tossed out fairly easily. I never saw Celestia as having that much of a connection to the sun; yes, it's her cutie mark, but it's not like she is the sun itself. That said, the entire issue with Twilight banishing the disease in waves of energy (which is basically what the heat and light and noise is) seems like a reference to the other story, which I can't really comment on.
Ah well, so from now on, things will go back to normal, right?
...right?
6498622 I figured that real life was demanding your attention. No rush.
6498653 Normal, that is how the story always works, right?
6498613 All fixed!
Or not. This works too, I still need to read that story.
6498653
Fire immunity isn't that troublesome. It's like assuming Pinkie to be an eldritch being, just that one assumes non-metaphorical a different event in the cartoon: Twilight's ignition post-hydra rather than Pinkie appearing in the mirror.Nevermind, re-watched; Twilight had burn-marks.And this isn't either of two fics (that I know of) with Twilight being in an active foundry. (One is Melt.)
Ok. So this was indeed another connection. Damnable void. Corrupts so much.