Back at her old Cloudsdale school, Pixie Dust was teased and bullied for being the weakest flyer as well as being a blank flank. Her mother decides to move them to a small quiet town where she hopes her daughter can fit in and make friends. Although Pixie seems to have given up hope, three fillies hope to change that.
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like the concept but you need to go back and add some detail to it also dt and silver spoon would be fine to make her cry.
A decent first draft. It needs more expansion of the ideas. Not only more descriptions, but maybe more about what's going on. What does Fairy Dust do that she can just up and hop from town to town? What happened to Pixie's Dad? Does the lack of a parent pull her closer to Bloom and Scoot, since they're bereft of parents as well? After that, then go back and edit it to fix all the sentence fragments and errors you can find. Then have someone else do it. All in all, a good attempt at the feels, now just apply some polish.
I can only think of the fact that the story is lacking in detail... It would be great if you added more of it.