Discord paced around the library while he read his book.
Relating with your filly is easier said than done. With culture constantly changing around us, you may find yourself behind the times while your filly stays up to date on the-
He threw the book over his shoulder. "So much for that approach."
"I see you're taking the reading seriously."
An about face revealed Twilight standing there, the book hovering in her purple aura.
Discord rolled his eyes. "It wasn't very helpful."
"Really? How far did you get?"
He shrugged. "One...two sentences."
She groaned. "Well of course it wasn't helpful! You have to read more!"
Read more? Discord shook his head. "That book is duller than my sensitive side!"
The alicorn replaced the book on its shelf. "Something that you're going to see a lot more of as you get to know your daughter."
Discord felt something strain in his chest. He wanted to clutch at his heart, but refused to let Twilight know that he felt hurt. He hated to admit it, but he did indeed have to get in touch with his sensitive side if he planned to reunite with Derpy. He blamed Fluttershy. She was the one that made him realize the truth about friendship. But this was....deeper. He had to make a connection with his own child! He couldn't even begin to comprehend how to do that!
"Ahem!"
Discord blinked and looked down at Twilight. She had obviously said something and was waiting for a response. Discord sighed. "What?"
She sat down. "I asked you what you think we should do."
What to do? There were several things... "Hula contest?"
Twilight frowned. Discord tried to hold his smile, but found it slipping away the longer he looked at the princess. He groaned. "Fine! Why don't we invite Derpy over and introduce me?"
"Now that's a decent idea! I'll get Pinkie to go and find her. Pinkie!"
Pinkie came through the kitchen door, a grass skirt covering her flank. "I heard someone say 'hula contest'!"
-------------------------------
Discord sat waiting. He twiddled his thumbs, much to Twilight's annoyance. She was sitting next to him trying not to organize the library for the third time. Pinkie had been gone for nearly an hour. Where was she?
As if the silent question had cued her, Pinkie opened the door. "And this is the library!" She stepped aside to allow Derpy to walk in.
Derpy looked around at the shelves. "Cool!" Her eyes fell on Twilight and Discord. "Woah! You're Princess Twilight! And you're....a mixed-up.....dragon...thing..." Her eyes crossed in confusion.
Twilight smiled. "It's so nice to officially meet you Derpy. Rainbow Dash has told me so much about you."
Derpy's eyes uncrossed and actually focused on Twilight. She smiled. "Really?"
Twilight nodded and motioned to Discord. "This is my friend Discord. He's a draconequus. I wanted to introduce him to you."
Derpy trotted up to Him. "Cool! You're funny looking.... I like you!"
Discord smiled. "Thanks. You're not so bad yourself." He looked at her flank. "That's an interesting cutie mark. What's your talent?"
Derpy looked at her cutie mark. "Uhh....I don't know." She pouted. " I keep trying to find out, but everything I do is wrong."
She sat down causing one of the floorboards to squeak. This squeak meant the floorboard was shifting, unbalancing the table in the center of the library, which tipped it slightly, allowing a ball to fall off and bounce into one of the bookshelves. One of the books was shifted enough for it to fall off the shelf, causing a domino effect. When the entire shelf was empty, the whole bookcase fell forward.
Twilight jumped forward and froze the shelf in place. She carefully placed everything back where it belonged, sighing when she was done.
Derpy looked down at the floor. "Was that my fault? Sorry."
Twilight shook her head. "No it wasn't you. I have a great idea! Would you like to come to dinner tonight?"
The mare went from sad to happy instantly. "Yes please!"
Twilight smiled. "Why don't you come back a little later? We'll have a nice meal all ready to enjoy."
Derpy jumped in place. "Ooo! Will there be blueberry muffins?"
Twilight chuckled. "I'll make sure of it."
Derpy flapped her wings and flew into the door. She backed up and smiled, her eyes crossed again. "The door's closed." She opened the door and flew off.
Twilight looked at Discord. "Was that whole fiasco really her fault? I've never seen such an accident prone pony!"
Discord shook his head. "Accident prone means breaking a couple items in the room, not making everything collapse from sitting down. What you saw my dear Twilight was unorganized chaos. She causes it without realizing. It's something she'll have to learn to control."
The princess slowly nodded. "I'll leave that teaching to you." She giggled. "She was so funny about dinner. I've never quite understood that pony's love for muffins."
Discord smiled. "She obviously gets it from me. I love muffins above any other food!" He snapped his fingers and a muffin popped into existence. He grabbed it and took a bite. "Mmmm!"
-------------------------------
Discord admired his handiwork. He had conjured a table set for three with a floating, blue-flamed candle as the centerpiece. He snapped his fingers again and three plush chairs appeared around the table. He smiled. "Perfect."
Twilight entered from the kitchen with several trays floating behind her. "I think I've got a good variety for the main course. I'm sorry, but I wasn't entirely sure what you liked to eat."
He looked over the platters; small sandwiches, fruit, vegetables, muffins, and some various cheeses. He nodded. "It'll do. I'll tell you about my usual diet another time."
She set the trays down on the table and smiled. "It looks wonderful!"
'Knock Knock Knock'
Discord flew over to the door and reached for the handle. He paused and took a deep breath.
Twilight smiled. "You're going to be fine. Why don't you let her in?"
He nodded his thanks, grabbed the handle, and opened the door.
Derpy jumped as the door opened. "Oh! I'm in the right place! This is the right place, right?"
Discord smiled. "Yes. Come on in."
She trotted in. "It smells good in here. Are you cooking something?"
Discord held his tongue. He would have made a critical remark thick with sarcasm, but he didn't want to make her sad or embarrassed. Had she really forgotten they were having dinner? The accident must have done more harm than Celestia knew about. All of this raced through his mind in a split second. He smiled and responded to Derpy's question. "The food just came out of the kitchen. Have a seat."
She skipped over to a chair and sat down. "Ooo! Muffins!"
Twilight sat down and Discord joined them at the table. They began to eat, Derpy taking several muffins for herself. It was a few minutes before anything was said.
Derpy looked up at Discord. "Sorry about your nose yesterday."
He nearly choked on his sandwich. "What? How did you know that was me?"
She shrugged. "I don't know. Is it feeling better?"
He responded by rubbing his nose. "Yes. A lot better."
Derpy smiled and went back to her muffins. Discord looked at Twilight. She seemed just as surprised by the exchange. Discord nodded towards Derpy, hinting he wanted to tell her something. Twilight shook her head and mouthed 'not yet'.
He was about to obey, but changed his mind at the last second. "So Derpy, do you have any family in Ponyville?" Twilight glared at him, but he ignored her.
Derpy tipped her head to the side. "I don't think so. I think I have a mother somewhere..."
She remembered Startail! Discord felt his heart breaking at the thought of eventually revealing that her mother had passed on centuries ago.
The gray pony frowned. "But I don't think so. I don't know where they are."
Twilight smiled sympathetically. "That's too bad. How about friends? You must have tons of friends."
Derpy shook her head. "Nope." She went back to eating.
Discord looked at Twilight. He could see the tears welling up in her eyes.
When the last of the muffins on her plate was gone, Derpy stood and smiled. "Thanks for the muffins! I guess I should go now."
Discord shook his head. "No! You can stay as long as you want!"
Derpy tipped her head to the side again. "Really?"
-------------------------------
They spent the next few hours joking and laughing. Discord kept trying to think of a way to tell Derpy about her parentage, but couldn't find the right words or moment. He eventually resigned himself to enjoying the evening. And it was fun. True fun with good friends. He knew that he would hold this evening close to his heart for the rest of his existence.
Daaaaaw...poor Ditzy and Dissy...
NEW CHAPTUR! HURRAY!
D'aaaaaw overload
Finally, a theory in Derpy/Ditzys love of muffins.
Enjoying what I have read so far. Hope for another update ASAP
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Dawwwww
Nice job. Both a great chapter and I didn't find any spelling or grammar errors.
This looks extremely interesting and looks like it has a lot of potential to be hilarious. Definitely adding to read-later list.
2162261 well consider this: she was in the crowd for Twi appearance as royal student, and in the crowd of rarity's play, at the same age she is now.
and to that that she is the unofficial princess of muffins and all things pastry or delivering and yeah, she is.
You know, even though I could rag on endlessly about the premise and how 'she jumped forward in time' is a really horrible handwave explanation and really doesn't help me suspend my disbelief, your really, REALLY huge problem is sentence structuring.
Look at your second chapter. Take a VERY good look at it and tell me what you see. Every single line there is constructed in the exact same manner: [character] does [facial expression/tone change] "[dialogue]"
and this sadly carries over into the rest of your chapters as well. Even if I somehow accept your premise, the fact that it's written like such makes it... I'm sorry to say this, but it just makes the story read in an exceedingly boring fashion. Try to add a little color into your writing because as it stands, it's really dry.
Discord was fidgeting in his chair.
you could easily spin this into, just off the top of my head:
He kept fidgeting in his sit, his discomfort obvious to them. Considering his nature and the events though, this wasn't surprising at all. His wings twitched and even his fang seemed more pronounced than before.
Obviously this is rushed and everything, but I think it drives the point across. You need to at least try and mix up your sentences a bit, because the way they are right now is the most basic setup ever and unless it's a book for little children, it gets really tiring to read after a while.
2166716 Dang.... Them's some harsh words my friend....
Don't worry. You didnt hurt my feelings. Thanks for the feedback! I realized this rather quickly myself. I'm hoping my next chapter will read a lot better.
2166726 Sorry, I really wish you no ill will. This is just something that, in my opinion, needed to be stated quickly and firmly, before you start heading into more and potentially larger chapters. Trust me though, there are a lot of people on the site who could and probably would tear into your much harsher than I do. Good luck in your writing!
This would make since a bit, but a bigger fan of Screwball being his daughter. But I'll read anyways.
this is my new headcanon
Man I really am enjoying this story. To be truthful I wasn't one hundred percent sure if this was worth a read. I thought maybe this would be too our of canon. Great explainations to cover that up, good job.
2166767 I am a mean critic.
If you need any help proofreading, or doing any of that, I'd be more than willing to help. I am just that kind and generous ...
I can't handle all these feels. You're killing me, man.
YOU GOT FEATURED YOU LUCKY DUCK!
*Sees title picture*
I knew it.
Wait... Derpy DERPY! YES! A NEW DERPY STORY! Thogh I do belive his daughter is screwball, this should be one great story.
dtlux1
Dayum, Derpy's screwed up.
Hmmm... Relevant silly song:
[youtube=JuMBj7YBYGI]
this is beyond interesting
please proceed.
Finally an original fucking idea.
Looks at title, looks at picture. Should've known...
Neat.
I almost die. when pinky came out in the grass shirt it was funny.
New headcanon: Discord loves Muffins
2168283 Dear Twilight,
Discord's magic is very different compared to ours. And besides, it was a simple mistake on his part. He didn't know that imagining a life with the one mare he ever loved would be enough to create a child.
Wow.... I had not realized so much had been overlooked. I won't lie and say I wasn't a little hurt by all the comments mentioning my errors , but I've taken them to heart and am glad that there are so many willing to point out said errors. You ponies are saving my flank here! Thank you. I've gotten a few comments on structure as well and would like to say that I have been dong some minor revisions to previous chapters. No, it isn't a complete overhaul, but it does look better. I will be making sure all future chapters have better structuring and NO spelling/grammatical errors. If one slips by.... please be kind . Again, thank you all!
Speedy Quill
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2168610 Even in fixing something, I screw up.
2168647
Don't worry its only natural.
You just need to recruit some proofreaders!
Damn, I honestly don't think Derpy is THAT impaired, a little clumsy around the edges in my opinion. I do also think she has a social life too, I don't think she's "popular", but I do think she has a good amount friends, regardless, amazing story so far. Some grammar errors, easily fixable though. Well, looking forward to the rest.
2168610 "Gay" means happy or content, generation these days. -_-
2168690
No gay doesn't mean happy or content in general opinion these days.
You could stiff use it to that definition. but anyways the author admitted it was a mistake.
2168658 It's hard when you're talking about a background character. Almost anything goes. I'm not trying to make Derpy look like the village idiot, but she is supposed to have a few cards missing from her deck. And social life.... Well that's more speculation and opinion. I'm glad that you have a better opinion of her than I do. I'm still getting to know the lovable klutz.
The whole thing feels rushed. I mean, less than a day has gone by since he's found out, and he's already accepted it and is trying to reunite with her. The timejump feels forced, though I can understand the reasoning behind it. Also, it seems odd that they're only now mentioning that he has a daughter. It seems like it would have been a way to rehabilitate him much faster.
2167342 derpy and screwball are sisters
Discord, you dirty cop-out.
2168986 I see it this way: Discord's been reformed for a bit now and he's kept his more chaotic tendencies to himself. At the same time he's also begun to understand friendship. We saw that he was willing to stop destroying Sweet Apple Acres to keep his friendship with Fluttershy. Why shouldn't he be open to seeing his newly discovered daughter?
The time jump is the only way I could rationalize Discord having a relationship when he was free and Derpy still existing without making her immortal.
Finally, I can see what you mean by the knowledge of Derpy helping with his rehabilitation quicker than Fluttershy. But since Discord has already been officially reformed, I decided that it would become step two of his reformation.
MOAR! The story is cute.
2169132
My problem is more the pacing. I don't have a problem at all with Discord wanting to see his previously-unknown daughter. It just seems like he went from learning about it to wanting to see her and being in her life in an awfully short span.
I don't actually have a problem with the timejump, for exactly the reasons you stated, it just feels odd and a bit forced (admittedly, this is probably partly me, given that my headcanon has Derpy as the Doctor's companion)
You might want to mention something, though, about how Fluttershy wasn't actually Discord's first friend. I mean, "In love enough to want to have a child and spend the rest of his life with her" probably counts as friendship.
And don't take this the wrong way- I'm absolutely not saying this is a bad story. It's good, and I'm interested in what you do next. I'm just offering some criticism.
poor Derpy she tries SO hard and she fails EVERY time
Dawwww Derpy.
is
Uwaugh, my heart, it is kill.
>>>Twilight entered from the kitchen with several trays floating behind her. "I think I've got a good variety for the main course. I'm sorry, but I wasn't entirely sure what you liked to eat."
He looked over the platters; small sandwiches, fruit, vegetables, muffins, and some various cheeses. He nodded. "It'll do. I'll tell you about my usual diet another time.">>>
*Discord drooled as he thought about his favorite food of all time... "Ah humans, so tender. I really should have left a few for breeding stock. Oh well!"
2169132
Will Dr. Whoof and/or Dinky make an appearance? Now that I think about it, wow Dinky has both genes from a Time Lord and a Avatar of Chaos. Eep.
Also, does Discord or Celestia know about his other Fanon kid Screwball? Or for that matter is that "Barking Pony" from "Read It And Weep" a child of Discord too?
Muffin Proof 20% Tastier, It fits well.
What to do? There were several things... "Hula contest?"
Twilight frowned. Discord tried to hold his smile, but found it slipping away the longer he looked at the princess. He groaned. "Fine! Why don't we invite Derpy over and introduce me?"
"Now that's a decent idea! I'll get Pinkie to go and find her. Pinkie!"
Pinkie came through the kitchen door, a grass skirt covering her flank. "I heard someone say 'hula contest'!"
Derpy jumped in place. "Ooo! Will there be blueberry muffins?"
Twilight chuckled. "I'll make sure of it."
Derpy flapped her wings and flew into the door. She backed up and smiled, her eyes crossed again. "The door's closed." She opened the door and flew off.
Twilight looked at Discord. "Was that whole fiasco really her fault? I've never seen such an accident prone pony!"
Discord shook his head. "Accident prone means breaking a couple items in the room, not making everything collapse from sitting down. What you saw my dear Twilight was unorganized chaos. She causes it without realizing. It's something she'll have to learn to control."
The princess slowly nodded. "I'll leave that teaching to you." She giggled. "She was so funny about dinner. I've never quite understood that pony's love for muffins."