A Pokemon Problem
(9) - Stay Frosty
"Oh fuck..."
"Oi!" Ryder head-butted the cage softer than I thought possible, but still with enough force to stir whomever was trapped inside. This had the unfortunate side-effect of scaring the living hell out of the person inside the Swinub: they jumped nearly a foot high within the cage, bounced off of the metal bars, and cowered in the corner. Undeterred, Ryder continued.
"It's us, Ryder and—"
"Oh my God, you guys have no idea how happy I am to see you! Err, hear you. I can't see too well," the Swinub responded.
Well I'll be damned. By the voice, it appeared that Seth was inhabiting the furry little bastard. Instead of having strange warbles, like Ryder's, Seth's voice had actually deepened an octave or two, which was hilarious because he was a Swinub: those little piglets were practically foot-warming beanbags, and they didn't look menacing in the slightest.
And no, I wasn't even offended that Seth didn't care who was with Ryder. Not at all.
Deciding to get straight to the point, I asked, "What the hell are these Pegasi doing?"
"Peg-asi?"
"Yeah, Pegasi. Y'know, the plural of 'pegasus'?"
"I always thought those were called pegasuses," Seth remarked. "Anyway, to answer your question: I have no idea. I can't understand whatever it is they're saying. I mean, I was just minding my own business, out looking for food in the snowy forest, and the next thing I know, these two flying horses come and scoop me up!"
"And they just stuffed you in the cage?" Ryder asked.
Seth nodded his fluffy little head. "They weren't very kind about it, either: They stuffed me in here like an old plush toy."
I heard two voices that weren't Ryder and Seth slowly approach from the crater. They were constantly overriding each other, and it sounded like they were in the middle of a heated discussion. I closed my eye and listened in.
"I don't care how you feel about it," one snapped, a male voice. "What else are we going to eat up here, hmm? What—"
"Something! Anything other than this!" the other overrode, this one a female. "This is sick! We're ponies, not gryphons—"
"Don't you bucking dare compare us to those feathered imbeciles." The male voice responded in an icy tone—and I don't mean that he sounded like he was cold. "I should report you to the Captain for your insubordination."
"Insubordination?! All I said was the fact that this is sick!"
"Sick? Sick! We eat fish; they're alive, aren't they? What makes that furry brown thing in the crate any different?"
"How is it different—How is it not different?!"
"This conversation is over. If you don't want to assist, fine: do something that you think is productive. You can starve for all I care."
The female voice harrumphed. "You'll get yours, Spear. You'll get yours."
I heard the hoofsteps break apart and be no longer synonymous. Turning around and fluttering my eye open, I saw a solitary pegasus trudging its way through the snow—on a direct collision course with our little party. Thankfully, I was pretty sure that he (I was certain that pegasus was the male voice I had heard) couldn't see us: the wind, while not as strong as the Windigoes', was still strong enough to raise the loose snow from the ground, making it difficult for even me to see, and I had a computer-powered eye.
Spinning back around, I interrupted Ryder and Seth, who had been carrying on a conversation while I was distracted. I'd have to ask them about it later.
"I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but we've got a problem."
After getting their attention, I quickly explained the situation we were in.
"They—They're going to eat me?!" screamed Seth. Ironically, his voice went many pitches higher, making him squeal like... well... like a pig. I glared at Ryder for not explaining why we investigated the cages in the first place. He seemed to shrink a little.
"Not if we can get you out of there first," I said, hoping to instil some confidence. I made to speak—think, dammit!—about how we could get Seth out of the cage, but therein laid a problem. With myself only knowing Take Down until (or rather, if) I evolved into a Metang, and the fact that Ryder seemed to only know Lick, I had no idea how we'd actually get Seth out.
"Uhh... Seth, you wouldn't happen to know any moves, would you?"
Seth calmed down a little bit (most certainly from my direct and take-control attitude) and said, "I don't think so. Actually, wait! I can... sort of control the snow around me. I mean, I can't whip snowballs at anyone—nothing like that, but I can kinda... direct it, if that makes any sense."
It didn't, and that wasn't something that seemed to be useful in our current predicament. "Why don't you Tackle the cage?" Ryder offered. "You can do that, right?"
Seth shook his head sadly. "I tried that already. All I got was a headache for my trouble."
"Join the club," I muttered. My headache hadn't gone away ever since I used Take Down on Second Sight's home, but I'd learned to deal with it. Christ, it felt so long since that happened, although in reality, it was only earlier today.
"Dammit! There's got to be a way out of this mess!" Ryder exclaimed, thinking furiously, his eyes scrolling from side to side like he did back in his old body. Occasionally, one of his eyes would go all the way around from the momentum.
I heard a crunch of snow behind us, and I whipped around, bumping into the heavy cages when I did. They were heavy enough that they didn't budge, even with my two-hundred pound form hitting them.
Staring at us, slack-jawed, was a pegasus. Up close, I could see that his mane and tail were a dull grey. What parts of his body that weren't frosted white were a sickly yellow colour. I couldn't see his eyes, mainly because of the snow goggles.
After staring at us for almost ten seconds without moving, he finally spoke, quietly, but loud enough that I could hear—and what he said would've made me gulp had I still a throat to gulp with.
"My-oh-my. What have we here?"
Is it raining men? Because that would be gross. Men falling from the sky, falling on pavement. Bones breaking. Blood everywhere. Yeah... Not fun.
...pretty good. Here:
i.imgur.com/aHUFntf.png
Hmm. How many pegasi were there again? I highly doubt one Swinub would be enough to feed even one (assuming they're mostly fur), so I don't know why they'd bother.
2417255 What story is THAT!??!!
2417255
2417280
Not to spoil anything, but there may or may not be other ice/woodland creatures that they managed to get their hooves on...
2417298
There's a little thing in google chrome called "Inspect element" when you right click something.
2417300 That's a funny way of saying Mudkip
2417370
ENOUGH WITH THE MUDKIPS.
art.ngfiles.com/images/113/teddybearkiller1_retarded-mudkip.png
2417376 Ok
Um what is he worried about beldom are metal and gastly are ghosts.
2417306
Wisps are better qq
2417491
One of which he can't hit, the other is basically a 200-pound missile.
2417253 VAT!? XD
2417574
The Author's Note
2417253 You call it gross. I call it gravity assisted art.
Well good zombie-ish sir, there is an icy pig, a floating spirit ball, and a 209.9 pound floating metal cyclops rod. Btw, your mind might be frozen too.
Hm, doesn't the Beldum basically eat metal? Couldn't he just put his ass to the case and start chomping?
Don't worry, guys! We can totally eat a ghost and a 200-lb metal monster!
...
...
...crap.
2417540
Beldum used self-propelled meteor...
...Half a square mile was just leveled.
2417726
Beldum leveled up!
Beldum learned Explosion!
2417753
Beldum found a Focus Sash (does that counter Explosion's death effect on the user? I never tried it out.) and used Explosion. Beldum completely annihilated the enemy.
2417769
Beldum found uranium….Well shit.
2417784
Beldum found Kim Jong-Un and learned "Enrich Uranium into weapon-grade Plutonium."
...Oh no...
Metal cage? Why doesn't our floating metallic friend just EAT his way in?
2417796 Oh no…
*battle music*
Kim Jong Un wants to battle!
Kim Jong Un sent out Metagross!
Metagross used Transform!
Metagross transformed into a ICBM Launcher platform…
Metagross is preparing missile…but will it fail?
2417814
US used missile preparation. The US is preparing it's B-2 Stealth Bombers...
Kim Jong-Un used Copycat. It failed...
2417799 He eats with his butt. It's kind of embarrassing.
It just keeps getting better and better.
What about doctor who?
Since there are only pegasi and no unicorns I think he won't have a problem taking them all out with take down.
2418820
I meant the real government...
Who else thought of a gruff Russian accent when Seth talked?
2417280 Only a few are keen on eating the poor guy
2420018
4. Crush Seth.
Yeah, not a good idea, well, assuming they DO want him alive. :P
2419366 Understatement. So. Much. Understatement,
If the British government doing something useful is a miracle, the US government doing something useful must be a sign of the apocalypse
2419366
No, more like a balloon introduced to a napalm-nuke combo. The closest thing to being erased.
2417726
Pegasi body parts and blood were found with no trace of the three strange creatures.