• Member Since 23rd Nov, 2012
  • offline last seen Feb 21st, 2021

Xartis


My past is sin.

Comments ( 17 )

Funny. I was just playing "Donkey Kong Country Returns". :pinkiesmile:

I must admit, I can't agree with your Pinkie's opinion on bananas. I hate the things. :pinkiegasp:
Your story here, however is great. Thumbed up.

This was very good. It seems like you have the technique you mentioned in the description nailed down to a T.

My only complaints would be that you overuse the word 'banana' (sounds stupid, I know, but hear me out). What I mean is you write 'banana' multiple times in a paragraph when a simple 'it' will do. It might have been a subtle bit of humour, but I'm not sure. Secondly, sometimes it ventures into "She did this. Then she did that" territory, especially near the end. There were a lot of short sentences that could have been merged into longer ones.

Other than that, it was really good. An upvote from me.

Hmm. Writing a lot about a little, eh? I wish I was good at that. It's something I rather enjoy, for reasons I can't seem to explain.

:pinkiecrazy: all Pinkie Pie could think about was bannans

HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHa:rainbowlaugh:

Thanks for the positive comments guys. I might fix some of the things you pointed out at some point, but this is incredibly hard to do, especially when it has to be a minimum of 1,000 words. There's only so much I can say about bananas.

1897079 Dude. This was amazing :twilightsmile: I could see pinkie tugging at the banana in my mind. So cute :pinkiesad2: But just asking...does Celestia like bananas too? :duck:

Comment posted by Xartis deleted Jan 5th, 2013

1899769
Maybe she does in a possible sequel :moustache:

1908767 THAT WOULD BE AMAZING. :pinkiehappy: Please do it :yay:

After I read this, I saw an ad directly underneath stating one can cut down on stomach fat by not eating five certain foods, and it had a picture of a banana. I wonder if that cannon's still in Canterlot Castle...:trollestia:

1912863
Let's hope. *Maniacal laughter*

epic story is epic!!!!!:pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy: you gained my respect!!!

She pulled the skin off completely, discarding the peel into a nearby bin, and placed the perfectly peeled potassium pabulum onto a completely clean culinary circle.

:pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh: LOLOLOLOL :D

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