The Kingdom of Equestria, United by Princess Celestia,
During the long years of her reign she was able to defeat all foes of her realm.
All except one....
The war against the Horde took its toll,
And the prisoners of the kingdom were to pay the price,
The Princess needed magical gems for her army,
And every pony guilty of a crime,
No matter how insignificant,
Was forced to work the gem mines on the captured Zebra Island of Korinis.
To make it impossible for them to escape,
The Princess sent out the best unicorns in the kingdom,
To make a magical barrier around the entire valley.
I was one of them....
Ah, but something disturbed the delicate structure of magic...
We were trapped inside our own barrier...
One second of negligence was enough for the prisoners,
Korinis was now under the control of the convicts...
The Princess had no choice,
She had to negotiate,
She needed the gems.
Month after month,
The Princess supplied everything the prisoners needed,
Month after month,
They brought the gems to the edge of the barrier in exchange...
Until the present day...
Another convict was brought to the edge of the cliff,
She did not know it, but she would change everything....
((Main characters will be updated along with chapters.))
[I ask that if you down-vote, please let me know why so I can improve.]
A crossover between Mlp and one of the best games I've ever played?
Lunar Republic fic? Been awhile...
1645341
This story has been in the making for a while, Lunar Republic was the original iteration, but for quite a while that only plays a part in that intro bit. I'm considering changing it, but haven't decided yet, so please feel free to comment on it.
1645376 I wasn't aware that people still knew that trope existed!
Prepare for a long and detailed comment.
So first off, I am a huge. No. HUGE! fan of the Gothic series of games. The first two games and their expansions were just incredible. You've faithfully portrayed the original intro, whilst making it unique by having characters from the show appear as characters and not just an OC. I really like that you used Pumpkin Cake, sure she's just a baby in the show currently, but that means this could be either an alternate universe where events from the show occurred before the Gothic crossover or it could be an entirely original universe.
I also like how in the first chapter, you've established the bleak and desperate situation Equestria finds itself in, using its criminals as a slave labour force to hold off their enemies in the New Lunar Republic (NLR). Thereby establishing that like in Gothic, Equestria is involved in a war against an outside aggressor. Would you believe I also thought Pumpkin Cake was Applebloom originally, dunno if you intended that, but Pumpkin Cake's reveal did actually surprise me, so nice work there.
One thing I do know, is that MLP videogame crossovers can work and they can be very successful and entertaining stories. For instance Pony Age: Origins does what you're doing and retelling the story of Dragon Age, but it adds in it's own unique elements and plot twists. Basically what I am saying is I see a bright future for this story if you use stories like Pony Age to serve as examples of how to write this type of story. Anyway, I wish you the best of luck and look forward to seeing where you take the Gothic story and if you can give the classic story a unique edge.
I’ll have you know man, I actually subscribed to FIMFiction just to leave a comment under this awesomeness that you presented here. I thought that I wouldn’t see the day when someone posted a crossover fic with my first and most favorite RPG game/series of all time.
On a more review-ish note –it seems that you’re going more for a ponyfication of the actual game than for a crossover. While I’m down with it (
loved the first two games to death
), some might think that it’s a bit lazy on your part. If you’re planning on diverting from the game’s plot at some point, might want to give a heads up, so potential readers won’t decide to skip it entirely.
I actually like your characterization of the cast. It’s not every day someone sets the story so far in the future to feature the Cake Twins as grownups, but still keeps the mane cast. Although Rarity as Corristo (at least I always considered the mage giving the player the scroll in that cutscene as the Archmage himself) doesn’t exactly work for me, I’m willing to give it the benefit of the doubt. Who knows what she did over the years. As for Applejack –you couldn’t have chosen a better mare for the part of Diego
. Hmm… If Applejack and Braeburn are locked in the Colony, than what about Big Mac? Is he perchance the one and only Gorn?
Oh, and calling it now: the new Xardas is actually Twilight. Either she or Trixie, though I doubt the second one is true.
All in all, the story seams fairly interesting so far. I hope to see MOAR!
soon. Cheers.
Oh, and have a mustache.
You deserve it.
1649123
Hey, I’m cool with that. Even if it would be a ponification I would still read it, but if you’re going to add your own flare to it than all the better. Also I was just guessing who would play what character in this, I didn’t actually count on you revealing anything. It’s gonna be fun to see who got what role in your story.
On a side note: you mentioned that you considered changing the Lunar Republic bit from the prolog/monologue. If you were to ask me, I would indeed change it into something else. Consider either the Changelings or the Diamond Dogs, both would fit the role of orcs perfectly, the latter even more so with their built. Still, whatever you decide I’m down with it.
How was this idea not continued - it's beyond me...