Shenanigans

by Sunset_Shimmer83

OH CANEIGHDA

A four day weekend up in the Crystal mountains was just what the Sunset and the girls needed. Flash Sentry handed Sunset the keys to his grandparents' cabin, reminding her playfully not to destroy the place but still have fun. The girls had packed Rainbow's black Range Rover with their suitcases, with Rainbow managing to nick one of her dads’ large coolers, putting it under the bags. They left out of Canterlot at seven in the morning on Friday. It was a four day weekend in October, so the girls knew they needed to take advantage of it. The Sentry's’ cabin wasn't too far from the Caneighdian border, and Rainbow, being Rainbow, knew the drinking age was eighteen in the Quebuck. She also knew Applejack just had her eighteenth birthday in September, and she also knew Rarity could speak some French, if needed.

Rainbow connected her phones playlist to the car, the first song being their bands song "Awesome as I wanna be." Rainbow merged onto the highway, just outside of Canterlot, tapping her fingers on the steering wheel as she sang along, "Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Awesome as I wanna be."

Applejack reached over from the passenger seat and smacked her on the arm. "For the love of God, Dash, don't sing."

"It makes the baby Jesus cry," Pinkie sang from the back seat, playing a video game on her gamejoy.

Sunset took off her shoes and turned so she could put her feet up on the back of Dash's seat. "I smell rancid pony feet," Rainbow said. She turned. "Sunset, take your pony feet off the leather." Sunset shrugged, but slipped her shoes back on.

Applejack smacked her again. "Watch the road Dash!"

Rainbow slammed on her brakes the bumper of the Range Rover coming within an inch of a Volvo wagon. "Damn mom-cars," Rainbow grumbled.

"Damn impatient drivers," Rarity said, not taking her eyes off her compact mirror, as she attempted applying some make-up.

Rainbow nodded. "Yeah, them too...HEY!"

Applejack nodded towards the highway. "Rainbow, just pay attention. Traffic's moving."

"Fine," Rainbow replied.

Traffic was slow, as most of the drivers were heading into Neigh York. Rainbow and AJ got into an argument as to why Rainbow decided to go through the city when it took them out of their way. Rainbow argued it was faster. Applejack arguing that taking I-95 to 146 through Hoofington towards I-90 and then I-91 straight up to the Crystal Mountains would have been more direct. Rainbow told her to shut up.

The two continued to argue through Manehattan and Neigh Jersey, despite Fluttershy and Twilight trying to keep the peace, most of the arguments fabricated to give them something to do. Sunset was growing tired of listening to them bicker like an old married couple and had climbed into the trunk to sleep easier, not having to worry about putting her legs onto Twilight's lap. She situated her long, lanky body in between bags, and she drifted off. Rainbow crossed into the Crystal State earlier than everyone had thought, mostly due to her pulling eighty-five and ninety, well over the posted speed limit. She bought herself a new radar detector for this trip, so what should have been a seven hour trip was going to take five. She crossed into Crystal State two hours earlier than planned

Sunset woke up a few hours later to see they were in a rural small town, and she rubbed her eyes, wondering why she wasn't seeing any mountains. The Range Rover was empty, and she got out to see they were at a gas station. She was groggy from her nap, her mind still fuzzy, she saw the girls walk out of the convenience store with cases of beer while Rainbow downed a bag of Skittles.

"Finally," Applejack said, hand holding cases of Molson Canadian. "You're up."

Sunset rubbed her eyes. "What's with the beer?"

"What d'you mean?" Rainbow asked, chewing the candy loudly. "We told you we were getting beer."

Sunset shook her head. "In Verhoof?" It was then she saw everything around her was written in French and that the speed signs were in kilometers. "We're in Caneighda?" she screeched. "We're in Caneighda?!"

Twilight and Rarity put down the bottles of wine in each of their hands and ran to her. "Sunset, what is it?"

Sunset was still letting out high pitched screams in short gasps, her orange skin turning white. "We're in Caneighda! That's what it is!"

Rainbow took out another bag of Skittles from her jacket. "Yeah, so what? Sure they speak Prench and use funny road signs..."

"I can't be in Caneighda!" Sunset screamed.

Dash chuckled. "Why? You have priors?"

"I'm from a parallel universe, you asshole!" Sunset growled.

The girls all groaned, realizing the cause of Sunset’s distress. Sunset bit her lip. "How could you forget I wasn't born in this world...I'm an illegal citizen," The girls all winced. "Shit this is bad, this is very, very bad.” Sunset took a deep breath trying to calm herself down, as Twilight, Fluttershy and Rarity all rubbed her back.

Rainbow started laughing. "Oh, my God! This is hilarious!" Applejack turned and punched her on the arm.

"Damn it, Rainbow" AJ growled. "How the hell are we going to cross the border with an actual illegal alien in the car who doesn't have a passport or proof of citizenship?"

Pinkie shrugged. "Like we did before...Sunset's gotta hide in the trunk."

---

A black Toyota Land Cruiser, turned off of the highway towards the small road leading to the cabin in the Crystal Mountain range. Flash, along with several of the Crystal Prep Shadowbolts decided they'd surprise the girls for the weekend, and Flash figured this way, he wasn't lying to his grandparents.

"So how are we getting in if Sunset has the key?" Sugarcoat asked.

"There's a key my grandparents hide for emergencies," Flash said. "I think surprising the girls is an emergency."

The cabin was a six bedroom, two bath with a kitchen, den, living room, basement, and a pool and hot tub. It was within driving distance from the ski resorts and near the Camel's Hump State Park. The Camel's Hump mountain was visible from the back of the cabin, and it was one of Flash's’ favorite sights. He and Sunset had once hiked up to the peak when they had dated briefly and had come to Verhoof with his parents and the Camel's Hump was where they had first kissed.

Pulling up to the cabin Flash noticed that Rainbow's Range Rover wasn't parked at the cabin.

“That’s odd,” Flash said in confusion. “Rainbow should have definitely beaten us here, especially with how she drives.”

"Calm down, Bro," Lemon Zest spoke as she exited the car. "They might be in Caneighda getting the beer."

Just a little over an hour north of them, the girls were coming to the Quebuck-Verhoof border. Sunset was hidden under the bags, jackets, and blankets in the trunk. Rainbow pointed to the duty free shop, laughing that it said "HORS TAXES".

"What kind of country is this where they tax their whores?" Rainbow asked.

"Dumb ass," AJ sighed.

Pinkie patted the driver's seat in excitement. "Let's go in. We can get more booze and candy."

"Booze and candy?" Rainbow asked, her face lighting up. "I'm for it!"

"Hey, what? NO!" Sunset's muffled voice came from the back.

Pinkie reached over the back seat to uncover Sunset. "We're stopping at hors taxes."

Sunset sighed. “Fine. I might as well check it out, maybe get a souvenir for Flash and use the washroom while I'm at it.”

The girls all walked into the duty free shop, separating to check out the place. Rainbow humming Coloratura's "Razzle Dazzle" under her breath. Rainbow got a cart, filling it with all kinds of liquor, all being put on her credit card. AJ would have to purchase it, of course. Pinkie went straight to the candy and snacks aisle, and started grabbing a very unhealthy amount of sweets and chocolate.

The girls went to check out, AJ. taking care of the alcohol first. The cashier asked for a license plate number, and Rainbow gave it to her. "Quebuck?" the cashier asked.

Rainbow raised her brows and laughed. "God, no. Canterlot." Rarity smacked her on the arm.

The girls walked out to the Range Rover, AJ. packing the alcohol, and they got in. starting the car, Rainbow headed for the Border checkpoint, and the girls all handed over their passports.

"Business in Caneighda?" the officer asked.

"Just visiting, and getting some fries, with gravy and cheese" AJ said before Rainbow could say "To get beer".

"How long was the stay?" the officer asked.

"Just a couple of hours," AJ replied.

The officer nodded, handing the girls their passports. The let out sighs of relief, and Twilight patted the bags in the back. "Sunset, you can come out now." There was no response. "Sunset?" She turned around and uncovered the area to find there was no Sunset. "Girls, we left Sunset at the duty free."

Rainbow slammed on the brakes, sending Fluttershy flying back into the driver's seat. "eep!"

AJ hit her. "Go! There are cars behind us!"

Rainbow hit the gas pedal, and the tires squealed as she took the first exit. She quickly made a sharp U-turn, going back towards Caneighda. There was more traffic at the border now, and Rainbow banged her hands on the steering wheel. "Shit dammit! Let's go!"

They finally got to the checkpoint, and the Caneighdian border officer stuck his head out. "Registration."

The girls handed their passports over. "Listen, Canuck," Rainbow said. "We need to just get over to duty free. We left our friend over there."

"Rainbow!" AJ hissed.

"Ma'am, I would watch how you speak to me," the officer said, reading her passport.

"Look, we just need to get over to duty free, okay?" Rainbow asked. "We've seen Quebuck...it sucks, okay? All we need to do is go to goddamn duty free!"

The officer motioned with his fingers. "Ma'am, step out of the car."

"I'm not going to step oot of the car!"

Both Rarity and AJ hit her, as the officer called for backup. "Ma'am, pull the vehicle over there." He handed their passports back.

"Way to make this an international incident, Dashie," Rarity said.

"Never would have happened if that loser had just let us through," Rainbow said, pulling the Range Rover off to the side. "We should have just used fakes at Kappy's."

"Never would have happened if your fat, mouth would have just kept quiet," Twilight shot back. "And you already tried the fakes at Kappy's. We left there with nothing."

Rainbow turned around. "I am not fat!"

The officers got Sunset and brought her to the girls in the station. Two officers sat the four down. "You're over the limit on illegal citizens you can smuggle into this country," one of the officers said, his tag reading "Oudekirk". The other was "Conway".

"Well, what is the legal limit on that?" Rainbow asked. "We only had one illegal."

Oudekirk shot her a look. "The limit is zero."

"Dammit," Rainbow sighed.

"Sunset never told us she was an undocumented citizen. We don’t want any trouble,” Twilight lied nervously.

Conway raised his brows. "Didn't tell you she was a alien. Seems convenient, eh?"

Pinkie nodded. "You got us." She stood up. "We're here to take over your country."

Fluttershy bit her lip and let out a nervous laugh. "Pinkie, I know it seems funny when you say stuff like that, but, uhm, for the love of God, don't."

Oudekirk nodded and walked around them. "No one leaves until we get answers."

They sat the girls down one by one to see what answers they'd get. Conway asked, "What are you doing in Caneighda?"

Pinkie's response, "We're part of an elite, high school terrorist team bent on making Caneighda number fifty-one. Call us Strike Force Canterlot High."

Twilight's response, "We just came here to get the beer, and...I love Hot Hot Heat...bandages, bandages, bandages!"

Rainbow's response, "Well, if ham's Caneighdian bacon, then what the hell do you call bacon?"

Sunset's response, "No habla inglés."

Fluttershy and Rarity refused to answer.

Conway's next question, "What's your business in Caneighda?"

AJ shrugged and looked at them with disbelief. "Getting...beer."

Rainbow scratched her ear and eye, "Do you ever get an Amareican quarter in your change?"

Pinkie smirked. "Seeing where we could build Six Flags Over Caneighda."

Sunset continued to look like a scared deer and said, "¿Puedo ahora ir de nuevo a la Canterlot?"

Conway and Oudekirk were getting agitated, and Conway asked, "What's your reason for coming to Caneighda?"

"Beer!" Rainbow. said. "Beer, beer, beer!"

"Yeah," Pinkie said, "I'm here to bang Stephen Harper."

AJ scratched her nose with her arm. "What the hell's with all the Tim Horton's? Where're the Paneras?"

Sunset bit her lip and said, "Tengo que utilizar el cuarto de baño."

The officers were getting agitated and brought the girls together. "You girls are in real trouble if you did what we think you did," Oudekirk said.

AJ. raised her brows. "What do you think we did?"

Oudekirk raised his brows back. "What do you think we think you did?"

Rarity crossed her arms. "What do you think we think you think we did?"

"Something involving a Caneighdian citizen being smuggled into the Amarica," Conway said. "That much is for sure."

"And now we're gonna get some answers," Oudekirk said.

"What are you gonna do? Torture us?" squeaked Twilight nervously.

Rainbow started to laugh. "Yeah. You gonna make us listen to Celine Dion records?"

Conway pointed a hard finger at her. "Hey! She's a wonderful performer, and you're not funny!"

"No," Oudekirk said, "I think what we're gonna do is call your parents."

Fluttershy covered her face. " Oh, my parents are going to kill me...”

Rainbow jumped to her feet. "No! We had to smuggle Sunset. It was the only way for her to see her great homeland...with its spacious skies and fruited waves of...plain. And..." She swallowed hard and began to sang in a beautiful soprano that shocked the girls, "Oh, Caneighda... Our home and native land..."

Oudekirk smirked, "Nice try, missie."

Pinkie stood up and added in her alto, harmonizing with Rainbow, "True patriot love... In all thy sons' command."

Conway shook his head. "It's not gonna work."

AJ, Twilight, Sunset, Rarity, even Fluttershy jumped in, the seven of them making a beautiful a cappella group, "With glowing hearts...we see thee rise the true north strong as..." They began to falter, but Sunset saved them, "From far and wide...Oh, Caneighda we stand on guard for thee..."

The officer joined the girls, "God keep our land...Glorious and free...Oh, Caneighda...We stand on guard for thee...Oh, Caneighda...We stand on guard for thee."

The officers nodded to each other, and Conway said, "You know, there must be some way to put this all behind us."

"We'll give you our beer," Rainbow said, wishing right away she hadn't.

Oudekirk nodded. "Oh, God bless you. Now...leave Caneighda, please."

The girls nodded and ran out. Sunset curled up in the trunk, and the girls decided to go get more beer. They managed to get across the border with no problem, a different officer letting them in this time. They drove down to the cabin, and they were surprised to find Flash's Land Cruiser parked out front. They walked in to find the Flash, and the five Crystal prep girls barbecuing in the back, Sunset ran to Flash, holding him in a tight hug.

"Well, to what do we owe this so-called pleasure?" Rarity asked.

"Hey Twilight!" Indigo and Lemon shouted, seeing their former classmate.

“Flash, being whipped, missed his woman, so he dragged us up here to watch them do it.", grumbled Sour Sweet.

Rainbow shot Flash a look. "No one needs to see that."

"Where were you girls?" Sunny Flare asked.

Sunset let go of Flash to get herself a beer. "It's quite the story, it is."

Author's Note:

this was just meant to be a silly bit of fun

Comments

[Skyblazer9]

This reminds me a lot of an episode of That 70's Show where the guys head up to Canada to get beer, Fez misplaces his citizenship papers and gets them busted after he opens a can of beer while hiding in the trunk of the station wagon.

Also I remember Eric saying "Beer. We came here for beer." while being interrogated by the Canadian Royal Mounties.

[Sunset_Shimmer83]

heh yeah, its actually based on that

[Skyblazer9]

11102197
Cool.