Happy best friends day!

by LePoneh

Friends for life.

Happy Best Friends Day!

By LePoneh

---

In Equestria, everyday something was going on. Whether it be as small as a birthday party or as big as a celebration, there was always something special happening. Today, like any other day, was a special day. Not just to one pony but to everyone since today was best friends day! The 8th of June every year was best friends day in Equestria and on this day, ponies celebrated their best friends, showing them how much they care.

Pinkie pie awoke with a bright smile on her face. Being Pinkie, she knew what was happening on every day of the year so of course, she knew what today happened to be. She quickly hopped off of her bed, running through her morning routine and preparing to face the day. After getting ready, she trotted up to the ice cream by the stairs, tapping it lightly and letting the rest happen. The ice cream shook before the two top layers sunk into the third, opening the floor and letting Pinkie slide her way down.

Upon reaching the bottom of the slide, she immediately began rummaging through piles of supplies and files. From a filing cabinet, she pulled out a box wrapped in rainbow paper. In between balloons sat a box wrapped in sparkly white paper. Under a pile of supplies sat two boxes, one yellow with a butterfly pattern and one orange with an Apple pattern. She stood in the middle of the room for a minute, her eyes scanning her surroundings before diving at a cake. She landed in something hard. Wiping away the cake in the object revealed one last box wrapped in midnight blue paper that had two strips on it, one magenta and one violet. She towered the boxes on her back and went up the slide, ready to see her dearest friends.

---

A loud yawn filled the room in which Rainbow Dash lay.

“Morning Tank.” The pegasus said to her companion who gave her a smile as she got out of bed. Rainbow walked over to her calendar to see if anything was going on today. “Hmm, let’s see.” She said putting a cross on the seventh of June. “Eighth of June.” She muttered. “Best friends day. Right.” She said. She walked away from the calendar and towards the bathroom to get herself ready for the day.

Once done with her morning routine, she walked over to Tank with some food. She placed it in front of him the looked up to see him pointing at a hairbrush. Rainbow let out a laugh. “Not a chance buddy.” She said, adjusting the propeller on his back. After doing that, she walked over to a cupboard sitting by the back wall of her bedroom. When she opened it, items flooded out. “Gah!” She exclaimed as was submerged in her stuff. “I really need to ask Twi for some organising help.” She though out loud. Tank nodded. “Gee thanks.” She muttered, climbing out of the mess.

“Right, where did I put those presents?” She asked herself looking around for the boxes. “Wait, did I even put them here?” She asked before zooming into her living room. On her sofa sat five identical boxes. Identical in shape, size and wrapping paper. The wrapping paper was rainbow like her mane. “Found ‘em!” She exclaimed, grabbing the boxes. “I’ll tidy this up later, gotta get to Twi’s castle. Don’t wanna be late. Bye Tank!” She said, hugging the Tortoise before zooming off towards the crystalline structure known as Twilight Sparkle’s home.

---

5:00 am. Cock-A-Doodle-Doo went the rooster of Sweet Apple Acres. Just like every morning, Applejack was up on her hooves by the time the rooster called. “Good morning Sweet Apple Acres!” She heard Granny Smith call from downstairs, lengthening the o’s in good. Applejack let out a brief chuckle at her grannies antics before heading towards the bathroom to start her morning routine.

Ten minutes later she was downstairs looking at the good spread on the table for breakfast. “Mornin y’all!” She said to her family already seated at the table.

“Mornin.” Big Mac said in his normal, deep voice.

“Mornin sis!” Applebloom exclaimed.

“Mornin youngin.” Granny Smith greeted.

Applejack quickly took her seat at the table, indulging in her breakfast. “Right, ah’m gonna be out fer today, best friends day ‘nd all. D’you think you can handle everythin today?” She asked them.

“Don’t worry, all of yuz take a break. You all got friends to see.” Granny said earning unsure looks from the others. She quickly waved a hoof and told them to enjoy their day.

Back upstairs, Applejacks was searching under her bed. That was where she last remembered putting the gifts she brought for her friends. After searching for a good 15 minutes she came across the boxes. They weren’t too big so they would manage to fit into her saddlebags. She put them into her saddlebags and made for the door. It was now 6:00 am. If she left now and took the scenic route to Twilight’s castle, she’d make it by 6:30 am. She shrugged. Better early than late.

---

Rarity woke up late. That was probably because of the dress order she had to finish yesterday that ran late into the night. She practically jumped out of bed when she saw the time. “8:30 am?!” She screeched. “I’m supposed to be at the castle by 9:00!!!!!!” She lit her horn and things starting flying across the room. Normally she took half an hour to get ready but now she had half an hour to get ready, eat and get to the castle. “Ten minutes for each.” She told herself as she went to start her, only ten minute long, morning routine.

Try as she might, she couldn’t get her hair to perfection in ten minutes so average had to do. The almost ran down the stairs when she saw she had spent fifteen minutes doing so. She froze when she took a sniff of the air. This time she did run. She sped into the kitchen to see smoke everywhere. She grabbed the fire extinguisher in her magic, holding her breath and moving Sweetie Belle away. She sprayed the room. “Sweetie Belle, what is the meaning of this?” Rarity asked.

“I’m sorry Rarity I just wanted to make you breakfast.” Sweetie Belle squeaked. Rarity let out a sigh.

“I understand. I was hoping for breakfast but I’m late as it is and I best be going.” She said, trotting towards the door before freezing in her place. “THE PRESENTS!” She shrieked before racing up the stairs and slamming the door.

“Where are they, where are they!!” She questioned as she ran around her room looking for the gifts she had gotten her friends. Every few second, her eyes darted to the clock. “Gah! This is hopeless.” She shouted.

“Uh, Rarity?” A voice from the doorway asked.

“Yes, Sweetie?” Rarity asked.

“We’re you by any chance looking for boxes wrapped in different fabrics?” She asked and her sister spun to face her.

“Yes, where are they?!?” She asked impatiently.

“Downstairs, on the table.” She said.

“Thank you Sweetie have fun with your friends!” Rarity called as she rushed down the stairs, grabbing the presents in her magic and slamming the door behind her as she left. Sweetie stared out the window then to Rarity’s clock.

“Hey, this clock overturned.” She said to no one in particular. Walking over to it, she turned it to 7:57 am. “That’s better!” She said as she left the room, humming a little tune.

---

Birds chirped, signalling the start of the day. Fluttershy’s eyes fluttered open to reveal the sunlight streaming in through the window. She got out of bed and walked over to the bathroom to start her morning routine. A smile graced her lips as she walked into the main room of her house to see her animal friends eager for food. Flapping her wings, she went towards the food supply.

“There we go.” She said as she finished pouring food into their designated bowls. Once finished with that she walked over to Angel. “Alright Angel, I’m going to be leaving you in charge for the majority of today. The girls and I are gathering at Twilight’s castle for best friends day.” She said. “I’m putting all my trust in you so please don’t disappoint me.” She said earning a determined nod from Angel. “Now, where did I put that wrapping paper?” She asked herself, looking around to locate said wrapping paper. She heard a squeak from behind her causing her to turn around. “Oh, thank you Mr Squeaks!” She said to the mouse that stood by the rolls of wrapping paper. She picked them up and flew over to the boxes that sat on her sofa, beginning to wrap them up in a beautiful flower patterned wrapping paper.

“Done!” She started proudly, staring at the neatly wrapped boxes in front of her. “Now, where is my saddlebag?” She asked. This time, no animal gave a reply for they did not know either where her saddlebag happened to be. “Oh no,” Fluttershy said before beginning to frantically search around the room. The impatient tapping of Angel’s foot managed to get her attention. When she looked ya him she saw him pointing behind the sofa. She flew over and saw her saddlebag. “Oh, thank you, Angel.” She said, pulling the bunny into a hug before taking her saddlebags. She carefully placed each box into the saddlebags before saying goodbye to her animal friends and departing.

---

Twilight woke to a delicious smell. Having revised her to-do lists and checked the calendar the day before, she knew exactly what today was and what she was going to be doing. It was 6:08 am. Her friends weren’t coming until later so she had time to get ready, have breakfast and finish some work. She walked over to a drawer, pulling it open to reveal a small box wrapped in green paper with purple stripes. She smiled at it, levitating it over to her vanity and placing it down. She let out a content sigh before walking over to the bathroom to begin her morning routine.

Twilight stepped into the dining room to reveal a large spread of food set on the table. Her mouth fell agape as she stared at the various foods set up. From pancakes to freshly made croissants. “Wha.” Was all she could say.

“Happy Best Friends day Twilight.” A voice from behind her said. She turned around to reveal Spike standing in the doorway, a bright smile on his face.

“You made this all?” She asked in fascination.

“Yep, took a while but I managed to get every last thing.” He said proudly.

“Oh Spike, it’s wonderful!” She exclaimed before a realisation struck.

“Oh Faust, this all makes my gift look quite petty.” She said with a small chuckle. “Hey,” He said sternly.

“Don’t sell yourself short. I’m sure whatever you got is amazing.” He said before adding, “Even if it’s a book.” The two broke into a fit of giggles.

“Don’t worry Spike, it’s not.” She said, handing him the box. Spike took ahold of it and ripped off the paper. He carefully opened up the box and gasped.

“I-it’s us as the power ponies!” He exclaimed. “And me as Humdrum!” He looked up at a smiling Twilight. “With real gems. How?” He asked. She tapped her horn and laughed as his mouth fell agape. “No...” he said in a disbelieving manner.

“Yep! Now come on I’m starving!” She said walking towards the spread, Spike following behind her.

“Sweet Celestia, I’m stuffed!” Spike exclaimed.

“No kidding,” Twilight muttered, rubbing her stomach. “I think we can save the rest for the girls if they're hungry.” She said, getting up from her chair. “Now, I’ve got some work to finish before they get here, if they do can you let them in?” She asked and Spike nodded.

“Should you really be doing work now?” He asked.

“Spike, I need all my spare time to finish this. I’ve been at it for five weeks, I need this time.” She said.

“Alright, but when the girls come, your gonna stop.” He said.

“Alright.” She said before walking towards her study.

---

“LATEEEEEEEEE!” Rarity screeched, her eyes shut as she ran through the streets of Ponyville. She really should’ve looked where she was going because she crashed into Applejack and Pinkie Pie who was casually chatting as they made their way to the castle.

“Geez Rares, what’s the rush?” Applejack asked, dusting off her Stetson.

“What’s the rush??” Rarity asked. “We’re late!!” Pinkie and Applejack gave her confused looks.

“No we’re not silly, we’ve still got plenty of time and hey look it’s Dashie and Fluttershy!” The pink mare exclaimed, pointing towards said pegasi.

“Dash, Shy, over here!” Applejack called, catching the attention of both mares and getting them to land in front of the three others.

“Hey, guys!” Rainbow said to them.

“Wait, so I’m not late?” Rarity asked.

“Late?” Fluttershy asked.

“Where ever did you get that idea?” Rarity looked towards the boutique then back to the group. “I uh. I think my clock overturned.” She stated calmly.

“Right, lets quite the dilly dalllyin and get ourselves to the castle.” Applejack said earning several nods of agreement. “Yep, let's go!” Rainbow exclaimed, taking to the skies and flying towards the castle, the others following close behind in the ground.

When they arrived at the castle, they knocked on the doors. Instead of Twilight opening it as they hoped, the door was opened by Spike. The others froze.

“You guys okay?” The young dragon asked the mares.

“Oh my gosh. Spike, I forgot to get you a present!” Pinkie exclaimed.

“Ah forgot too.” Applejack said shamefully.

“Here here.” Rarity agreed. Fluttershy and Rainbow just nodded in embarrassment.

“Oh, it’s alright, I got the best gift ever from Twi.” He said with a smile as he opened the door.

“Are you sure sugar?” Applejack asked him.

“Positive, Twilight should be in her study, said she had some important work to finish off.” He explained.

“Work? Seriously?” Rainbow deadpanned.

“Yep,” Spike said as he walked off towards the kitchen.

“Well, let's go.” Rarity said, taking the lead.

“So, do we knock or what?” Rainbow asked the other girls as they stood outside Twilight’s study.

“That would be the most civil thing to do, yes.” Rarity said before lifting her hoof and knocking three times.

“Come in!” A muffled voice said from inside the room. Pinkie Pie opened the door to reveal Twilight sitting at a desk, a quill scratching furiously at a piece of parchment.

“Twilight?” Fluttershy asked softly to not startle the mare.

“Hey girls, I’ll need about 20 minutes to finish this off, feel free to eat anything, thanks!” She said in a rushed manner.

“No way, today isn’t about work, it’s about friends,” Rainbow said before grabbing the paper from the desk, startling Twilight. Her shock quickly vanished and turned to anger.

“Rainbow Dash! Give that back!” Twilight shouted angrily.

“No way, you're supposed to be hanging out with us, Twi. Plus, this can’t be that important.” Rainbow said, continuing to hold Twilights work in the air.

“Rainbow, give it! It’s important work I need to get done!” Twilight lit her horn in an attempt to snatch the papers from her pegasus friend.

“Hnng. No! You're not gonna ditch us for some pieces of paper!” She exclaimed, tugging at the sheets. Both sides kept up the tug of war not realising the papers were ripping.

Rip.

Both of them froze, letting go of the papers and letting them flutter to the floor. The room was silent.

“No,” Twilight whispered. “No no no no no!” She screeched, picking up the ripped papers.

“Hey, Twi! I got that coffee you asked foAHHHH!” Spike shouted as he tripped over a box on the floor causing the tray and mug of coffee to fly through the air. The coffee spilt all over the papers before falling to the ground with a crash. “Oh, that’s gonna hurt in the morning,” Spike muttered before looking up. His entire body froze. “Oh...oh no.” He murmured. “Twilight?” He asked. Twilight was frozen in place, staring at the papers. Ripped papers, she could fix with a spell or two. Soaked papers though, unsavable.

“Five weeks.” She mumbled. ”Five weeks I poured all my time and effort into this.” She said. “And it’s destroyed.” Rainbow felt guilt overcome her.

“Hey, it can’t be that bad.” She said. Upon seeing Twilight’s face, she regretted it.

“Not that bad?” She asked. “NOT THAT BAD!” She shrieked. “AS IF YOU WOULD KNOW! ALL YOU DO IS LAZE AROUND EVERY DAY. YOU WOULDN’T KNOW REAL WORK IF IT SMACKED YOU IN THE FACE!” Everyone was taken back by the sudden outburst. Rainbow quickly recovered and she was mad.

“Of course I know what real work is! All have you know being a worker at the weather factory is no easy feat!” She exclaimed. Before Twilight could say a thing, Applejack spoke.

“Yea cuz pushin aroun clouds is so hard.” She said, her voice dripping in sarcasm.

“Why you little!” Rainbow began only to be cut off by Rarity.

“Applejack, for once, has a point.” She said.

“Hey!” Applejack exclaimed but Rarity promptly ignored her

“All you do us push around clouds, that can’t even begin to the level of work I do.” She said.

“The level of work you do?” Applejack asked. “Spare me the laugh. All you do is put together yur little dresses! That ain’t nuthin compared to the work I do on the farm.” Applejack stated.

“Why I never!” Rarity said adding a ‘hmph’.

“Applejack’s right!” Pinkie said. “You don’t work as hard as I do.” Pinkie claimed.

“And when did you come into this,” Fluttershy asked, much to everyone’s surprise.

“Could ask the same question to you.” Pinkie replied. “But like I was saying, none of you work harder than I do on a daily basis!”

“Oh please!” Twilight said. “All you do is bake confectionery and throw streamers around.” She said, putting a hoof at Pinkie’s chest. “There’s nothing oh so complicated in that!” She jabbed at her chest causing Pinkie to stumble back.

“What about Fluttershy!” Rainbow exclaimed.

“Stop trying to downgrade my job Rainbow Dash!” Fluttershy shouted.

“Darling, she would if you had a job.” Rarity stated, smugly.

“You didn’t,” Fluttershy muttered.

“Oh but I did.” Rarity sneered.

“YOU BU-”

“SHUT UP!” Spike shouted. All attention fell on him. He let out a sigh and began to speak. “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t speak. You all need to calm down so take your stuff and get lost.” He said. The girls were about to complain but Spike said in a louder voice, “Get lost!”

Silently, each of the girls left the room. Twilight went up to her room and the others left to calm themselves down elsewhere.

---

The second she got out of the castle, Rarity fled. She had no intention to be near those ill-mannered brats. “All I do is make dresses.” She said. “The nerve of her!” She exclaimed.

She trotted through the, now bustling, streets of Ponyville. Everywhere, ponies were with their friends, exchanging cards, gifts and even the simplest of hello’s. Rarity couldn’t help but smile at the amazing friendships that ponies had made. She then frowned as she remembered her situation. She let out a sigh. This was supposed to be a day we’re they celebrated their friendship, not ruined it. She shook her head clear of these thoughts. She didn’t know where she was going but it was far away from them.

“Rarity?” Rarity almost broke something due to the sped she turned around.

“Sweetie! Girls!” She said, walking over to the crusaders.

“Aren’t you suppose to be with yer friends?” Applebloom asked.

“Well, uhm, we, uh, sort of...” She tried to explain but no words formed.

“What?” Scootaloo asked, curiously.

“We might have had an argument,” she said.

“Oh.” The three girls said in unison.

“Well, did y’all say sorry?” Applebloom asked.

“You see Applebloom, it was quite the heated argument and we might have all stormed off.” She said going quite at the end.

“Well, go back! Apologise. That’s what friends do! You said things out of anger. They’ve probably got over it by now. Plus no one should be apart from their friends on the day you’re supposed to appreciate them!” Sweetie exclaimed. Rarity

stared at her before a determined look appeared on her face. “Your right! I’m going to apologise to them and set things right!” She said before running off.

“Oh, and thank you, girls!” She called.

“Bye Rarity!” They all called back before running off towards Sugarcube Corner.

---

Pinkie let out a sad sigh as she walked into Sugarcube Corner. Everyone in the shop was having a great time with their friends but she was alone. She silently walked into the kitchen. She mindlessly pulled out supplies and started to bake. Her mind was filled with thoughts. Mainly recalling the argument they had had earlier.

“Pinkie pie?” She heard a voice ask from behind her.

“Mrs Cake? Something I can help you with?” She asked.

“Pinkie, is something the matter?” Mrs Cake asked worriedly.

“Nothing, why would you think something was wrong?” Pinkie asked, an unnatural smile on her face.#

“Pinkie.” Mrs cake said sternly.

“Oh alright! Me and the girls had an argument and we said things that we’ll regret and I don’t know what to do because we made each other so upset and it was awful!!!”

She cried, falling into Mrs Cake’s embrace.

“Well, Pinkie, have you tried apologising?” She asked.

“We kinda all stormed off after the argument.” She said sheepishly.

“That’s alright, I’m sure they’ve come to their senses now so why don’t you go back and apologise.” She asked.

“Yea, I should and I will! Thanks, Mrs Cake, your the best!” Pinkie exclaimed.

“It’s no problem dearie. Go have fun.” She said as Pinkie hopped away happily. Mrs Cake looked around at the baking supplies lying about.

"Just finished cleaning too."

---

Rainbow Dash was staring at a cloud. “Stop looking at me like that.” She growled. The cloud stood still. “I’m not an idiot!” She said to the cloud. “I messed up. I shouldn’t have taken her work from her.” She said guiltily. “Don’t rub it in my face!” She snapped. “It was her hard work and I completely destroyed it!” She said, her head drooped. “I’m an awful friend.” She concluded. Hopping onto the pillow and drifting slowly across the sky.

“What?” She deadpanned. “I know I should apologise but they probably hate me.” The cloud didn’t do a thing. “You’re not going to leave me alone till I go apologise are you?” She asked the cloud. “Oh alright! I’ll go just leave me be.” She exclaimed, getting off the cloud and flying towards the castle. The cloud smiled.

---

“Ah wasn’t bein a good friend.” Applejack said sadly.

“Eeyup.”

“And ah shouldn’t have insulted any of them like that.”

“Eeyup.”

“And you ain’t gonna say anythin else?”

“Eenope.”

“Right.” Applejack said. Picking up her (not alcoholic) cider and taking a swig.

“Y’all should go back and apologise Jackie.” Big Mac stated. “It’ll help with yur problem.” Applejack stared at him before taking another swig of her drink

. “Ah dunno, d’you think they’ll listen?” She asked unsurely.

“Eeyup.” Big Mac replied.

“Oh alright.” She huffed. “See ya later Mac.” She said.

“Bye Jackie.” He said calmly before picking up his cider and finishing it in one gulp.

---

The cottage was a debate room. Animals were screeching at each other and Fluttershy was in the middle of it. “Please calm down everyone, I understand you want to help but this isn’t really doing much.” She called but the animals kept at it. “Please everyone!” She pleaded but to no avail. She knew what she had to do but did not like it one bit. “EVERY CREATURE QUITE!” She shouted. That got their attention.

Fluttershy let out a small sigh. “I’m sorry everyone but your arguing wasn’t helping it was giving me a headache.” She said. The animals present all sheepishly apologises. “That’s what I’m gonna do.” She started earning confused looks from her animal friends. “What I mean is I’m going to apologise.” This warned protest. “I know I didn’t say much but I did say something and I regret it.” The animals didn’t want to argue any longer so instead, they cheered in support. Fluttershy smiled. “Thank you, everyone. I’ll see you later!” They all said bye as she left.

---

Twilight flopped onto her bed. All her hard work had just been destroyed and along with that her friendship. Tears threatened her eyes as she lay there alone. She curled up into a ball and was about to cry herself to sleep before she felt something stroke her back. She lifted her head to see Spike. “Spike?” She asked.

“Shhh, it’s alright.” He said soothingly. “I’m sorry Twilight. I should’ve been more attentive.” He said.

“It wasn’t your fault Spike, you were right, I should’ve stopped when they arrived, now I’ve ruined everything.” She said tears spilling from her eyes.

“Twilight, you guys have argued before, just apologise.” He said.

“I doubt they’ll want to see me anymore.” She said.

“Twilight they're your friends, they’ll come around.” He reassured.

“Your right.” She sighed.

“I know.” He said with a comforting smile. “What about your work?” He asked her.

“Friends first, work later.” She stated calmly.

“Twilight.” He said, a knowing look on his face. She sighed.

“Five weeks of time and effort all lost.” She said.

“Oh Twi, I’m so sorry.” He said.

“It’s alright Spike. I could always do it again. So much rewriting. It’ll be so much fun!!” She exclaimed.

“There’s the Twilight I love.” He said with a smile. “Happy best friends day.” Twilight pulled him into a strong hug.

“Happy best friends day.”

Knock knock

---

Rarity, Pinkie, Rainbow, Applejack and Fluttershy ran into each other outside the castle. The best word to describe this was awkward.

“Hey,” Rainbow said, getting hey’s and hello’s in response. Rainbow sighed. “Listen, I messed up. I shouldn’t have ticked Twi off like that and I shouldn’t have said anything. I’m sorry.” She said.

“As am I.” Rarity said. “I said some rude things to you all and I regret it. I’m dearly sorry.” She finished.

“Ah’m as well. I was awfully rude to y’all and it was wrong. I hope y’all can forgive me.” Applejack said, moving her Stetson to cover her eyes.

“I shouldn’t have been been such a meany pants grouch to you all. It was wrong and I’m sorry!” Pinkie exclaimed, getting a laugh out of everyone.

“And I’m sorry too. I almost lost my temper and if I did I would’ve said things I regretted.” Fluttershy said.

“Well,” Rainbow said turning to face the door. “One more pony to apologise to.” She finished before going to knock.

Knock knock

---

The door swung open revealing Twilight. Her eyes were red from obvious crying yet a soft smile was on her face. Her expression quickly went to one of surprise. “Oh, uh.” She started but couldn’t finish. Rainbow pulled her into a hug.

“I’m so sorry Twilight. I didn’t mean to ruin your work!” She cried. Twilight returned the hug.

“It’s alright Rainbow, you didn’t mean it.” She said, but Rainbow wasn’t having it.

“But, five weeks of hard work down the drain!” She exclaimed.

“Which I can do again. That includes rewriting, re-experimenting and so much more!” She exclaimed happily. Rainbow pulled away from the hug and they all stared at Twilight before breaking into laughter.

A little while later, they were all sitting together in one of the many rooms of the castle. They were seated with mugs of hot chocolate as they chatted the day away. They had set aside the presents so they could just spend time together. “I’ll have to say, today has been hectic!” Twilight exclaimed and the others agreed.

“Yeppers! But it only proved even more that our friendship is unbreakable!” Pinkie said, throwing her hooves in the air.

“Indeed, no matter what happens we shall get through it.” Rarity proclaimed, her voice had not a single trace of doubt in it.

“Ah’m just glad we did sort everything out.” Rainbow nodded.

“Mhm. Now we can all relax.”

Spoke too soon.

From outside they heard screaming.

“MONSTERRRRRRRR!!!” Someone shouted.

“You had to jinx it?” Fluttershy asked as they got up.

“Apparently.” Rainbow grumbled as they left the room. All except Pinkie Pie. Pinkie made sure the others were out of the room before saying,

You know today is also world oceans day but you didn’t write about that.” Then waving and saying,

“The end!”

Author's Note:

By now, it probably isn’t the 8th of June anymore but this was fun to write anyways. I feel like, whether it’s on the 8th of June or not, this day is perfect for a world that revolves around friendship.

Did a major edit of this. Thank you for the feedback received. Fixed the majority of the dialogue. I would love it if you tell me if you find anything else that I need to fix.

Hope you all enjoyed!

Comments

[Melody Song]

I really like this, the only nitpick I have is the character's dialogue isn't spaced out in separate paragraphs. Usually when a new character starts talking there's a new paragraph. But it's a very good story otherwise.

[Uz Naimat]

My apologies if this sounds rude, but I have to say this.

I want to like this story. Really, I do. Bit I can't. It's... confusing to understand. Melody Song said itʼs a ʼnitpick,ʼ but it's more than that.

When you write dialogue, you need to separate your paragraphs according to your speaker. When the speaker changes, change the paragraph. Otherwise, you'll get huge walls of text like this one.

Again, I don't mean for this to sound rude. Would you like an example?

[LePoneh]

10277745
Thanks a lot for telling me, I picked out quite a few problems in my writing that I'm planning on fixing as soon as I can get to it and that includes dialogue and paragraphing. Again thank you for your feedback, it is greatly appreciated!

[Uz Naimat]

10277883
No problem. I really enjoy helping others when it come to their writing. Let me know if I can help you some more.

[LePoneh]

10277398

10277745
Thank you both for your feedback. I have fixed the dialogue problem! Or at least I believe I have. Thanks again for your help, hope this is better!

[Melody Song]

10277973
It is a lot better, less confusing. It's alright too, in my earlier days of writing I did the same, and now I've gone back and corrected the paragraphs myself. Still, this was a great story, I really liked it.

[LePoneh]

10277986
Thanks a lot, glad you enjoyed!

[Melody Song]

10277995
No problem

[Uz Naimat]

10277973
Okay. The story's much more readable now. Have an upvote. That said, there's still a few problems with dialogue.

This is wrong:

“We might have had an argument.” She said.

You don't put a period if the dialogue is followed by ʼsaid Character.ʼ You put a comma. Furthermore, the word ʼsheʼ is not to be in uppercase.

Right:

”We might have had an argument,” she said.

[LePoneh]

10278065
Thank you for the upvote and the help I’ll fix it right away.

[Uz Naimat]

10278083
My pleasure.