Sunset Shimmer and Vinyl Scratch have been dating for some time, but the fact that their sex life relies on drugs is pushing them apart. Vinyl does her best to change that.
An entry for Oroboro's Sunset Shipping Contest: Endings. Rated T for strong language (a single F-bomb is dropped), drug use, and discussions of sex.
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Huh. Not sure what I even think about this story.
Your writing is good, and it feels like something from personal experience which gave the whole thing a realistic edge which kept it all grounded. Vinyl's dialogue, especially in the beginning, was funny and real.
I never quite bought into the chemistry between them, which made me relieved when they broke up because it didn't seem like a long-term healthy relationship (and that might have been intentional, given how much we see Vinyl's dependence on Sunset, so yay!). However, something about the story as a whole didn't work for me, and it might have simply been that there was a certain dreariness to the whole fic.
This was a very different Vinyl, but it ultimately worked. This whole world is so dark and older, it threw me off a bit, but then I got into it. Having her interact with the different EQG characters was a nice part of the process.
And frankly that ending nearly made me upvote on reflex, that was great!
(PS- I upvoted anyway. Good luck in the contest!)
9834428
Thanks for the comment and the upvote! The dreariness of the atmosphere in general was actually what I was going for; withdrawals from acid, and especially ecstasy, tend to make everything seem dark, gray, and unappealing. After being such a heavy user, of course everything would look like mega-crap to Vinyl. I'm glad to know that I got that part down.
I don't know that I can get behind Sunset's logic at the end there, but guilt is a helluva drug. You did a good job with this Man! I loved the part you had Wallflower play, especially with the flowers.
This was... a bit of a mixed bag for me, but a good read overall.
I think my biggest issue with it just comes down to what's told and what's shown. I think this story leaned too much towards the latter for its key moments--I was told how Vinyl struggled to recover from her withdrawals, told how big a deal intimacy was for her, told how dysfunctional she was when she wasn't high. And I think the end result of that was that her struggle to get through her withdrawals felt really easy in a way that didn't click with me so much when the story made her drug issue out to be such a big deal.
Wallflower was a definite highlight, though. I think her having more of a full scene with Vinyl went a long way here, and let awkward bluntness give her some nice character, and I love that it's arguably the most troubled of the bunch besides Vinyl who ends up getting that more pivotal role.
9834787
Indeed; guilt and self-abhorrence really can hurt you, and make you feel unworthiness to the nth degree, especially if it involves a loved one. Sunset's logic behind it is mostly that, if they were ever to get together again, there wouldn't be a moment where the both of them were truly happy because they either wouldn't get intimate, or Sunset would guilt trip herself if they did, and thereby spoil everything for herself all over again.
9835055
Yeah, I blame my knack for procrastination when it comes to how a lot of Vinyl's recovery was kinda skimmed over. The last time I had much of a timeframe for a written project was when I was back in high school, and so I'm used to taking my sweet time on stuff, which kinda bit me in the ass when it dawned on me the precious few days I had left to finish the story. If I had known earlier that there was a contest, I'd have gotten more detailed with things than just having skimmed over a lot of her interactions with the others. But alas, neither time nor my attention span were on my side.
As an aside, seeing you and Tethered-Angel comment on my work makes me feel like a millionaire! Aieee, I love you guys!
This is one of the most sad depictions of Vinyl I've read about, and while I am glad she got better in the end, this does feel like an entirely different character then what I'd expect from her, but I ain't complaining.
Love the character to bits, and it is always a shame whenever she is put into tragic circumstances like that as I always will feel bad for her, no matter what. You wrote her pretty well too and her chemistry with Sunset was really sad but also beautiful, in a way.