A belated introduction sparks a friendship between one of Equestria’s recent villains and Ponyville’s resident human. As the two draw closer, their friendship slowly becomes something more.
One thing though, I think it meets the criteria to be added to this group, and I've always thought it strange that we, the readers, don't need the author's permission to add their story to a group of our choosing. (As far as I know, that might've changed with that whole 'Applebloom fluff fic in all the bad folders' thing a while ago)
9149980 You are correct. I honestly didn't know that group existed, but yes, it's an RGRE fanfic (some people don't know what that is so I tried to explain it in layman's terms). I've added it to the group now.
9150006 Don't worry! We all make mistakes. I just wanted to be sure you weren't telling the same scene from, say, starlight and Tom's perspectives seperately.
If that had been the case, we would have needed to talk about making retellings more interesting than a copy/paste, though...
Tom struggles as a human in an Equestria where mares are the dominant sex. Stallions are traditionally home-makers while the mares make the money for the household. Will Tom conform to traditional Equestrian values or will he pave his own path?
This will probably be the reason why he is more happier with Starlight later, but is this again a story, where they usually tread the human the same even if he is not a pony and their world probably works differently for other species?
I haven't read it yet, but if it's true that Starlight will be the only one treating him differently because that's what she still wants to achive in this story, then this could be a story for me.
9151060 Probably, but so far she seems to just be treating him as if he is a male pony, when it has been made clear he doesn't like being looked down on. As-is I don't see him developing any feelings for her until she changes her tune.
Read through it one more time. If you're going to try and stay on the front page I suggest you pay attention to what you spell or at the very least get yourself an editor.
Last line,
“Ok, then. Bye!” Starlight waived at Tom as she hurried out the door.
Should be
"Ok, then. Bye!" Starlight waved at Tom as she hurried out the door.
Sorry, I've become cold hearted in my years of being on FimFiction and posting some edit suggestions.
9200315 A crack story (as in: was the author on crack when he wrote this?) Usually means an extremely bizarre or ridiculous story. Annoying when done badly, hilarious if it's well written. Might include a crack-ship: a totally unexpected pairing ( like Maud pie x tirek)
Tom put on his best customer service smile as the stallion closed the register, a heavy thunk as it locked. “I hope you have a wonderful day Mr. Shine.”
Very much liking this so far.
One thing though, I think it meets the criteria to be added to this group, and I've always thought it strange that we, the readers, don't need the author's permission to add their story to a group of our choosing. (As far as I know, that might've changed with that whole 'Applebloom fluff fic in all the bad folders' thing a while ago)
9149980
You are correct. I honestly didn't know that group existed, but yes, it's an RGRE fanfic (some people don't know what that is so I tried to explain it in layman's terms). I've added it to the group now.
Great start, but I think the middle section got repeated... that or it's so similar I didn't notice any difference.
9150003
So THAT'S why the word count was so off from expected... Fixed now.
9150006
I wanted to make a tea pun but I couldn't think of any
9150031
A missed opportuni-tea is always such a shame.
9150006
Don't worry! We all make mistakes. I just wanted to be sure you weren't telling the same scene from, say, starlight and Tom's perspectives seperately.
If that had been the case, we would have needed to talk about making retellings more interesting than a copy/paste, though...
Hmm a fascinating and quality story. I shall be looking forward to more chapters to come good sir.
9150048
that it is
I like it.
Keep it going!
I demand moor I say.
But for real man this is top of the line.
niceee
I like this so far. I liked and faved it. Can not wait to read the next chapter whenever you get it done.
This will probably be the reason why he is more happier with Starlight later, but is this again a story, where they usually tread the human the same even if he is not a pony and their world probably works differently for other species?
I haven't read it yet, but if it's true that Starlight will be the only one treating him differently because that's what she still wants to achive in this story, then this could be a story for me.
Everyday I'm hustlin'
You have my interest.
one chapter in and already in the feature box. Congratulations.
Nice. You have my attention. Grats on the feature.
9151060
Probably, but so far she seems to just be treating him as if he is a male pony, when it has been made clear he doesn't like being looked down on. As-is I don't see him developing any feelings for her until she changes her tune.
Someone add this to the reverse gender roles group
Yes!
Make Starlight being given the D! Otherwise she may devolve into a communist dictator again. Just remember the break-up with Sunburst ;)
This has potential. Also, add some Clop so I can add it to the Naughty Shelf, where this story should be.
Guess I've been around for a while. Guess this is pretty nice. He said 'guess' a few more times than I'm comfortable with but it is a good start.
Is nobody gonna mention this guy, considering the title?
vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/fallout/images/4/42/Tinker_Tom.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20160131212528
9153562
The title definitely reminded me of him, but I figured the comment section already had mentioned him.
This has a lot of potential! Looking forward to much more!
Am enjoying this and can’t wait to see what else you come up with.
All I could think of during the pool scene was...
Decent set-up. A bit bare of description, but well-written. I'll be keeping an eye on this one.
I love a good human x Starlight fic. The RGRE is a nice little bonus, as well. This certainly has potential.
Have a like and a fav, good sir.
This has all sorts of amusing implications for Rarity in a role-reversed universe.
nice la
Read through it one more time. If you're going to try and stay on the front page I suggest you pay attention to what you spell or at the very least get yourself an editor.
Last line,
Should be
Sorry, I've become cold hearted in my years of being on FimFiction and posting some edit suggestions.
9155733
Fixed. I appreciate it.
Is this a more sensible rgre? Because that's all I've wanted for a while. Can't wait to read more
9156528
You're going to have to give some context for that one. Not sure where your baseline is. What do you mean by "more sensible"?
Honestly this is the first official Starlightxhuman fanfic I'm reading so far, this is getting up to a great start and can't wait for more!
9156542
I would imagine either not cringey nor a crack fic. Seems like a nice story.
9188229
wtf is a crack fic
Oh wow, early century sexism here, the "stay in the kitchen" styled preference for males
9200315
A crack story (as in: was the author on crack when he wrote this?) Usually means an extremely bizarre or ridiculous story. Annoying when done badly, hilarious if it's well written. Might include a crack-ship: a totally unexpected pairing ( like Maud pie x tirek)
Mr. Shine, him diamond!
I have great intuition too trixie. So does my mom. Must be a family thing. Wonder who Your mom is trixie?;)