A clattering noise filled the alleyway as hooves made contact with cobblestone in one of the dark alleys of Fillydelphia. Shortly after was the sound of a pony being pushed to the ground. Fancy Pants groaned. The long, weeping gash across his cheek began to ooze scarlet as fresh blood stained his matted coat. Behind him was the sound of muffled crying. The unicorn made to get up, but was stopped by a hoof pressed against his side. The owner of the hoof spat out the cigar butt in his mouth, laughing cruelly. He was a unicorn as well, a fedora on his head and sunglasses covering his eyes. He was Shades Slick, the most feared mobster in Fillydelphia.
"Oh Fancy Pants. When will you ever learn? You can't hide from the mob. Especially me." The loan shark leered at the grounded pony through his aviators. They were his trademark pair; he was never seen in public without them. After all, he did have a reputation to uphold, and what would he be without his glasses? The two other mobsters that were behind Shades Slick snickered as Fancy Pants squirmed against the hoof that was pressing him down.
"What do you want from me, Shades?" Fancy Pants rasped. The mobster's hoof was limiting his breathing, causing him to speak in a ragged whisper. One of his ribs had definitely broken, a sharp pain in his side confirming this. He tried to groan, but all that came out was a shaky rasp. At this, the trio of ponies, all dressed smartly in midnight black tuxedos, laughed even harder.
"You might want to lay off the cigars, my friend. They aren't good for your lungs," Slick said, at which his two henchmen continued to laugh. The mobster let the commotion caused by the two die down before he continued. "But you know why I'm here, Fancy Pants. You see, I'm a busy guy. I have things to do, places to be. And you're a busy guy, too. I'm sure you have things of your own to do, and places of your own to be. The thing is, when you're late on your payment, things don't work out. And when things don't work out, I get angry." He paused, picking up the cigar butt he had discarded moments ago.
"Tell you what, Fancy. We're friends, right? Yeah, we're friends. The best of friends, I dare say," the pony confirmed, not waiting for Fancy Pants to respond. As he talked, he animatedly swung the cigar butt about, punctuating his lines with a jab in the air. "Because we're such good friends, I'll give you a deal. You give me the money right here, right now, and I let you off, no strings attached. So what do you say? It's an offer you can't refuse." He emphasized the last word by pressing the still-glowing end of the cigar butt into Fancy Pants' shoulder.
The unicorn did his best to not cry out. In a sense, he succeeded; he managed to remain silent as the cigar burned against him. Seeing as his attempt to make his victim break didn’t work, Shades lifted the butt from Fancy Pants’ shoulder. However, the victory was short lived as he turned his gaze towards another unicorn, behind Fancy Pants. Instantly realizing what was going through the mobster’s mind, Fancy Pants surrendered. "Fine! I'll give you the money!" The crying had grown louder and more desperate in tone. Shades lifted his hoof off of Fancy Pants, who shakily got up. He pulled a wallet out from his soaked petticoat and tossed it at the mobster's front hooves. "That's all I have," Fancy Pants said, head hung low.
"And it's enough. Congratulations, Mr. Fancy Pants, you're free to go." The loan shark bowed, pointing Fancy Pants out of the alleyway in mock courtesy. "A pleasure doing business with you." The following laughter from his henchmen was ignored by Fancy Pants as the unicorn turned around, limping over to the crying figure.
"Let's go, Fleur." He grabbed her hoof, pulling her off the ground. Fleur had been there the whole time, witnessing her husband being beaten and mugged. She had been curled up, crying to herself. Fancy Pants helped her to her hooves, and the couple began to walk past the three mobsters.
"Whoa, hold up there, Fancy. I said you were clear to go. I didn't say nothing about this pretty young mare here. She's staying with us." Fleur recoiled in fear as Shades Slick began to make his way towards her. She looked at Fancy Pants, desperation in her eyes. "It's about time this dainty little whore gets what she deser-"
A hoof connected with Shades' jaw, interrupting him mid-sentence. The loan shark came crashing to the ground, yelling out in pain. Moments later, Fancy Pants was on him, raining blows over his face and upper body. “You. Do. Not. Speak. About. My. Wife. That. Way,” Fancy Pants grunted, enunciating every word with another heavy blow. The mobster's two companions made for the assailant, but hesitated once he turned towards them. There was no rage evident on the unicorn’s face. There was only a determined calm, which unsettled them even more. Instead, the two mobsters looked at each other and simultaneously came to a decision, and they turned and ran down the alley, running into the streets of Fillydelphia, leaving their leader to experience Fancy Pants' fury first-hand.
"Stop! Please! I'll do anything!" Shades Slick cried out, his front legs raised over his face in a futile attempt to stop the wrath of his attacker. Fancy Pants aimed one last swinging blow for the loan shark's jaw. A solid crack confirmed that he had broken it. Ignoring the pained cries of the mobster, Fancy Pants got up. He trotted slowly over to his companion, the pain from his cracked and broken ribs causing him to limp. Reaching Fleur, he put his front hooves on her shoulders.
"Listen to me, Fleur. This is the last time anything like this will ever happen. We're going to become rich and famous, and live in a big house in Canterlot. You hear me?" The pink-maned mare nodded shakily. "Listen to me, Fleur!" Fancy Pants repeated, shouting at his wife. "Never. Again. Will I let you be this unhappy. I promise." A quiet sob escaped Fancy Pants as he embraced Fleur. Her crying eventually stopped as he held her there in the alley. When both of them had calmed down, he helped her up, and turned to the prone figure behind them.
"Shades Slick?" Fancy Pants began, looking at the pony in disgust. "I believe these are yours," he said, throwing a pair of broken sunglasses at the loan shark. Shades, his suit now ruined, didn't seem to notice as the glasses landed besides him. "Let's go, Fleur." He made his way down the alley, his arms around his wife.
Things will change... I'll make them change.
"Fancy Pants! Fleur! So nice to see you both!" a female voice cried out. Fancy Pants' mother hadn't been expecting either the couple to drop by, as they seldom did. The aging unicorn pulled her son in for a motherly hug, Fancy Pants reluctant to return it. She also gave Fleur a hug; the two ponies grew quite close after the marriage. They would spend hours talking to each other about various topics, like two friends would.
"Mother, may we step inside? I have something to ask father," Fancy Pants said, revealing the reason of the couple's sudden appearance at the doorstep of the small home in Canterlot. It was well into night, and the beautiful moon and stars took their place in the dark sky.
"Well of course dear! Come in, you'll catch a cold if you stay out in this weather too long." She stepped aside, allowing the couple to enter the house. Fancy Pants couldn't help but feel a wave of nostalgia sweep over him as he entered his childhood home. It wasn't by any means a decorative house, but it gave off a cheery, cozy feel that no mansion or condo could even come close to mimicking.
"Your father is in the study, if you’re looking for privacy, that room is going to be as close as you can get. Fleur will stay here with me, we have many things to catch up on. Besides, I'm sure you'd rather talk things out father and son." Fancy Pants nodded in appreciation and made his way to the study. There wasn't a door that separated the study from the rest of the house, but Fancy Pants rapped on the wall with his front hoof. Seeing as there wasn't a response, he went in.
His father was sitting in a large armchair, apparently engrossed in a newspaper. Fancy Pants' father had a remarkably groomed mustache, as well as his trademark pipe, which was between his lips. Strangely enough, it didn't seem to be lit. Fancy Pants strode over to the seat opposite to his father, and sat down. His father was intent on ignoring his presence, and it took several long moments before he slowly and deliberately folded his newspaper away.
"What would you like, son?" He said the word with contempt. "After all, you only visit when you need something."
Fancy Pants chose to ignore his father’s snide remark. "Father, I come to you today to ask if we, Fleur and I, could use the second house." The second house was a one-story home that had fallen under the ownership of Fancy Pants' father. It had been where it is today for as long as he could remember, at the edge of Canterlot.
Fancy Pants' father gave his son an incredulous look before he spoke. "Let's say I comply with your wishes and allow you to use the second house. What would you use it for?"
"I wish to start a jewelry business along with Fleur," Fancy Pants said. He and Fleur were matched in the art of gemcrafting, both unicorns able to chisel and shape the jewels just right to go perfectly with a ring or necklace.
Surprisingly, his father seemed to take the thought into consideration as he . Could this be? However, Fancy Pants proved himself too easily excited when he heard his father's answer. "No. You are not to use the second house for any of your selfish ventures."
Frustration began to boil in Fancy Pants' chest. "I apologize father, but I was unaware that assuring that my wife and I have enough money to feed and shelter ourselves was considered a selfish act." The tension between father and son grew, as insults began to be thrown back and forth.
His father turned on him. "Don't act like this is my fault; you only care about yourself. You only listen when you find it convenient to whatever foalish ‘rise to success’ plan you have in store."
"You are in no position to criticize me on my selfishness," Fancy Pants said through gritted teeth.
His father laughed coldly. "You should visit more often. Visits like these always make your mother so happy."
"You couldn't care less about mother. All you care about is yourself. You're every bit as selfish as you make me out to be." Fancy Pants retorted, his voice beginning to rise.
His father matched him in volume, the two voices getting progressively louder. "After all, what kind of son doesn't even visit his parent? Especially after his father had done everything he could for him, yet the son still manages to ruin his life.”
"I'm a bad son? You were the one who smothered me to death, forcing me to adopt your snobbish way of life. And yet you wonder why I don't visit you. If it was only mother, I would be glad to."
"Do not criticize me, Fancy Pants. You are the most clueless unicorn I have ever had the misfortune to call my son." By now, the two mares that had been speaking to each other rushed into the room, attracted by the commotion.
"You were and always will be a terrible father. You do not even give your one and only son the opportunity to prove himself, instead choosing to shoot me down and criticize me for doing so."
"Give you a chance! Just how many chances have I given you? And any supposed son that shares my blood would know to listen to me when I give you a command, not completely ignore it and do as you please." Their voices escalated, and the argument had become a shoutmatch.
"Bloodline has nothing to do with this situation! You are the only dimwitted unicorn to still have beliefs in that pathetic form of a caste system."
"Bloodline has everything to do with it! For example, you choose not to marry a sophisticated, classy mare, but instead you choose to run off with a foreign simpleton. You are no son of mi-"
Fancy Pants exploded, his shouts turning into bellows. "You do not speak ill of my wife. You are the saddest excuse for a pony I have seen yet. To think that I ever looked up to you makes me want to have my family tree erased from the royal archives. The amount of hate I harbor for you is unmatched by any other pony in all of Equestria." His face was centimeters from his father's, his words black with hatred and eyes red with fury. He turned to his wife, who's expression was unreadable.
"Come on, Fleur, we're leaving." Fancy Pants reached the entrance of the room before turning around to address his silent father.
"You are no father of mine." Without another word, he exited the house with Fleur, leaving his parents in silence. His father sank back into his seat, eyes cast downward as he brooded.
Dearest Fancy Pants,
I am writing to you today in regards to your visit. You caused quite a scene here, surely it’s the most commotion this house has ever seen. However, that’s far from the point. You’re father was affected heavily by your words; he barely touches his food, and he spends all day sitting in his chair, looking towards where you had stood.
I don’t think you realize just how much you mean to your father, even if he doesn’t show it. He’s only one stallion, and those were tough times. He was bound to make some mistakes. I’m asking that you forgive him, Fancy Pants. If it’s any help, I convinced him to let you use the second house; may your venture be successful.
-Love, Mum
It was a beautiful day in Canterlot as a certain blue-maned unicorn made his way down one of the main streets of the city. There wasn't a cloud in the sky, and there was a fresh spring breeze passing through. However, Fancy Pants didn't have time to enjoy the weather. Multiple jewelry boxes surrounded the pony as he used his magic to levitate them in place. He had to get to the shop in time to lock these away. Hopefully, Fleur waits until I arrive before locking the display cases...
Fancy Pants was deep in thought, so deep in fact that he did not notice a group of ponies walking in his direction. Unfortunately, the group hadn't been watching where they were going either, and Fancy Pants inevitably collided with one of the unicorns in the group.
"Oof!" Fancy Pants grunted as the two ponies fell to the floor. The jewelry boxes he had been levitating fell to the ground, several of them opening. "I say, I am sorry for that, I wasn't watching where I was going." He began to pick up the cargo he had been carrying until then.
"Oh, it's quite alright," the other unicorn dismissed, brushing himself off. His eyes traveled to the boxes strewn about, as well as the jewels some of them contained. "May I ask you a question? Where are you going with such exquisite jewels?" For the first time, Fancy Pants looked up. The few boxes in his arms immediately tumbled back onto the ground when he realized who he had bumped into.
"P-Prince Loyalheart!"
"Yes, that is me," the prince replied. "I must say, you have amazing taste in gems." The boxes that laid open on the ground showed brilliant rubies and sapphires, as well as elegent topazes and emeralds of varying color.
"O-of course. I am a jeweler after all," Fancy Pants replied, showing his cutie mark as evidence of his profession. Three crowns were displayed proudly on the stallion's flank. "These jewels are for an order I have received earlier today. I'm on my way to my shop right now."
"Well, Mr..."
"Fancy Pants."
"Well, Mr. Fancy Pants, will you do me the honor of allowing me to accompany you to your shop? A unicorn with such good taste in jewel selection must have equally as magnificent wares."
Fancy Pants couldn't believe his ears. The prince, asking to come to his humble shop at the edge of Canterlot?
"The honor would be mine, Your Highness. I would be beyond glad to have you in my store."
"Well that settles it, then!" Prince Loyalheart turned to the ponies that accompanied him, which were evidently his entourage. "You are free for the night, I'm sure I will be safe without your protection." The ponies nodded, and began to make their way back to the castle, where they would receive their pay for their work that day.
"Now, Mr. Fancy Pants, where might your shop be situated? I'm sure you were in a hurry before I bumped into you, and I would hate to impose."
"Oh, it's no trouble, Your Highness. My shop is at the end of this street, it will take some time to get there by hoof," Fancy Pants answered. He had picked up the rest of his jewelry boxes, and the two unicorns began to make their way to the jewelry shop at the end of the street.
Fleur sighed as the grandfather clock in the jewelry shop struck seven. It was unlike her husband to be late, and now the mare would be in charge of making sure everything was locked and double-checked before closing the store for the night. The one-story house that the couple had started with had undergone a drastic transformation, from a drab home to a modest jewelry store. Where could this foal be?
As if on cue, the entrance to the shop swung open, admitting Fancy Pants into the small store. His jewelry boxes flew in behind him, landing themselves on various flat surfaces. "Fancy Pants! Where have you been? I was worried out of my mind!" Fleur began.
"Relax yourself, darling. I simply ran into somepony who was interested in our wares, that's all." Fancy Pants dismissed. Fleur gave him an incredulous look.
"Who in all of Equestria was so important that it took you so long to get here?" Fleur asked, hardly believing her husband's excuse.
"That would be me," a stallion chimed in as he stepped through the doorway. It took a moment for Fleur to recognize who this pony was. The blonde hair, the green eyes, the pristine suit... Fleur gasped, rushing to bow before the prince.
"Hello there, fair lady. I suppose you are Fancy Pants' significant other?" Prince Loyalheart asked. He took a moment to scan the display cases as Fleur responded.
"Yes, I am. My name is Fleur-de-Lis, most ponies refer to me as Fleur." she said as she went over to stand besides Fancy Pants.
"Fleur, is it?" the Prince asked, turning to face the mare. "Je dois dire, les bijoux en exposition sont merveilleuses."
Stunned at the sudden shift in language, Fleur responded. "Merci. How did you know I speak French?"
The prince chuckled to himself as he spoke. "Fleur is a name of French origin. Other than that, I took a wild guess," he added, winking. The prince turned to Fancy Pants, who had been surveying the scene before him with particular interest. "I can't help but admire your craft. It seems as if everything is done with the utmost mastery. Take this tiara, for example," he said, levitating a nearby tiara over." This sapphire is socketed in the perfect position, and the deep blue compliments the silver wonderfully."
"Oh, it's nothing, really," Fancy Pants dismissed. Surely, the prince was being courteous, complimenting his wares regardless of his true critique. It was to be expected of a prince, who no doubt had been taught the art of conversation. Loyalheart seemed to read his mind, as the words he spoke were a perfect response to Fancy Pants' thoughts.
"I am not simply saying that to be polite, Mr. Fancy Pants. Your wares have been the finest I have ever seen. So much, that I would like to fund your business, as well as hire you as my personal jeweler." Seeing the disbelief in the couple's faces, he went on. "If you accept, I will pay for the expenses of having the shop moved to the Market Square next to the castle, as well as supply any materials you need for your orders."
Fancy Pants was too stunned to speak. He simply stood there, mouth agape. Fleur was the one who broke the silence. "Y-you can't be serious, Your Highness. To do so would cost an enormous amount of money!"
"Ah, not to worry, chérie. Although it may seem like a substantial amount, it is really not too much for a pony with access to all the riches his heart desires. I would be glad to help, especially when two ponies with talent like yourselves require it." The prince turned to leave, but was stopped by Fancy Pants.
“Thank you, your highness. You don’t understand how much this means to us.” He made to speak, but chose against it. Fleur picked up where he left off.
"We have been going through tough times, Your Highness. The shop was getting to the point where we would have had to consider closing down due to lack of business. Both of us have lost many hours of sleep because of our financial situation. It is a great justice you have done for us today. I cannot begin to thank you enough. Je vous remercie."
The prince was visibly touched by the behavior of the two unicorns before him. "I had no idea that you two were so in need of the small act of generosity I have committed. Not only shall I fund your business, I shall provide you with as much money you need to afford adequate food and shelter here in Canterlot. It is the least I could do, seeing as you two will put the money to much better use than I ever plan on doing." He politely turned down the shower of thanks and praises that the couple gave him. He turned to leave, and the couple followed him out the door. For a long time, they stood there, watching the prince grow smaller and smaller, and eventually disappear as he rounded a corner. Even long after he had disappeared, they stood there together, lost in thought.
Short and sweet oneshot, took a little over an hour to write.
Special thanks to the people over at #EquestrianStudy. You guys are always a great help.
Cover by AngryLacers.
B'awwwwww.
So that's where Fancy picked up his kindness, good for him
I'm surprised no-one's liked this yet.
Consider it long overdue but well deserved.
Well done!
I am the only one who thinks Charles Dance would be great to voice Fancy's father?