To start over

by Midnight_Song95

Chapter 29

Celestia knew that something was wrong when Sunset didn’t come downstairs before afternoon, however when she went upstairs she wasn’t expecting to find the girl lying curled on her side beneath the covers, expression twisted in pain even though she was asleep.

“Sunset Shimmer?” She called, gently shaking the girl, earning a grumbled response that she couldn’t understand before the teen opened her eyes.

“Ugh, what is it?” she whined as she sat up, rubbing the sleep from her eyes.

“I was worried about you, you usually are out of bed before now even with sleep deprivation.” Celestia answered, earning a confused look from the teen who glanced over at the alarm clock on the table before groaning.

“It’s that late? Dang….I didn’t mean to sleep in this late!”

Celestia chuckled at the internal freak-out that the teen was having however when the girl stood up the light-hearted atmosphere changed as Sunset stood, stumbling forward as if she had been tripped.

“ Sunset? Are you okay?”

Celestia asked, grabbing hold of the teen who glanced up sheepishly.

“Yeah, I’m fine. My head’s just a bit fuzzy this morning.”

Celestia’s eyes narrowed as she helped the teen back onto the bed.

“And do you have any idea why you would be so off balance?” she asked, watching as the redhead hung her head so that she didn’t meet the older woman’s gaze.

“No.”

She lied, though she could feel the look intensify.

“Sunset, I need to know the truth.”

Her voice was measured, though dripping with disappointment at the teen’s attempt at a lie.

“Okay, fine. I have been taking something to help me sleep and I may have taken two pills last night besides one.” Sunset confessed, bracing herself for whatever lecture that Celestia came up with.

“What medicine? Where is the bottle Sunset?”

The woman said instead of anything Sunset was expecting.

“in the top drawer in the dresser.” Sunset answered, not looking up as she heard the woman rummage around, only looking up when she heard the woman speak again.

“Okay, now I know I need to lock all medicine up from you. Now, right now I want you to come downstairs with me, you can sleep on the couch after I get some food in you and I hope it helps your body deal with the medicine.”

Why didn’t she just tell me that she is having trouble sleeping? Why is she risk her health like this when she didn’t understand the consequences of what she was doing? Celestia wondered as she led the shamefaced girl out of the room and down the stairs.

“Sunset, you’re lucky that two tablets are only fifty milligrams and that is the full adult dose. You’re basically just drunk because your body isn't used to that high of a dose. We will talk about this later after you’re not groggy.”

Celestia said as she helped the girl sit down on the couch before disappearing into the kitchen, returning with a plate of eggs of toast.

“I’m not hungry.” Sunset stated, earning a look that reminded her of her old mentor though besides a stern retort the only thing that Celestia did was push the plate into her hands.

“Either eat or you can listen to my rant now.”

Celestia almost chuckled when the teen began to eat almost instantly after she had said that.

I don’t want to hurt the poor girl any more than she has already been hurt but this is ridiculous, she could have killed herself without even realizing that was what she was doing! She thought as she took a seat beside the teen, who glanced up at her wearily.

“I guess I can forget about getting my phone back for the rest of the week, can’t I?”

Celestia sighed, knowing that this was a delicate situation.

“We’ll see after you eat and get over the side effects,” Celestia answered, her tone firm but not unfriendly as she reached over and ran a hand through the messy, tangled mass of hair.

“What were you thinking? You had me worried.”

Sunset blushed and glanced down “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to worry anyone. But that was the only thing I could figure out how to make myself sleep without having nightmares.” She answered timidly

“Sunset, when you have a hard time sleeping you can always come to get me. “ the principal reminded her lightly, careful to keep her tone level and not accusing “I know you are used to doing things on your own but you don’t have to face every single problem alone.”

“I’m no foal! I should be able to handle a bunch of stupid nightmares.” Sunset retorted, earning a sigh as she set the now empty plate onto the coffee table in front of them “I don’t need someone to hold my hand every second of every day.”

Celestia just sighed, shaking her head at the girl as she debated what to say.

“Sunset, no one is saying that you can’t handle it on your own. I am just saying that if it gets too much you don’t have to. You have people that care about you.”

Sunset bit her lip as she glanced down at the floor, trying to keep the turbulent emotions that she felt from leaking into her response.

“Yeah, but for how long?”

The question came out a whisper, though Celestia could hear the slight waver in the tone.

“What do you mean sunset?”

She prompted softly, earning a sigh.

“I always manage to push people away. I had friends when I was really young, three to be exact but I managed to screw that up somehow! Just like how I screwed up with my aunt and uncle and then the Princess!” Sunset confessed, eyes flashing dangerously as she looked up, though the woman could see the slight tremble in her lip.

“Sunset, you were handed a bad card as a child. I understand that but you need to understand that not everyone will turn their backs at the first sign of trouble.” Celestia said before adding “what brought all of this on anyway?”

Sunset sighed and closed her eyes, the images from the previous night’s nightmare played through her mind.

“No one cares about a demon.”

“Do you think we ever were really your friends?”

“I keep having this dream where everyone just leaves me floating in this black void…Then that…thing starts taunting me. Sometimes the dream changes into something worse…other’s I wake up before it happens.” Sunset admitted, glancing down before adding “and what people said online isn’t helping.”

“What did they say Sunset?”

The redhead’s shoulders slumped as soon as she heard that question.

“They overheard my friends and I talking earlier evidently…and they said that I was still that…thing. That I must have used mind control to mooch off someone.” It was only half the truth but Sunset didn’t want to talk about that post, and she just hoped that Luna wouldn’t disclose what she found online either.

“Sunset, that isn’t true and you know it.” Celestia sighed before closing her eyes for a second.

I know Sunset was outright nasty to other students there for a while but this is uncalled for. I need to try to stop this before it gets any worse. The only reason I couldn’t stop Sunset was that she was as cunning and manipulative as a snake and had a lot of people afraid to tell who was behind what.

Opening her eyes the woman regarded the girl in front of her, taking note of her hunched frame and how she had her head rested in her hands. This wasn’t the same girl who had tried to rule the school, no whatever persona she had adopted during her reign of terror was gone now, replaced by a broken, confused, young woman who had no idea where to go from there.

“Sunset, can you tell me what you would do if you could use magic now?” Celestia asked, suddenly having an idea as to how to approach this topic.

“I-I don’t know. I mean, it would be nice to levitate stuff again so I didn’t have to walk across the room to get a book when I’m studying.” She answered, earning a chuckle.

“So you’d just get lazy?” she teased, earning a hint of a smile.

“I guess so.”

“See, you’re not a monster, you’re Just a regular girl who has struggled to find her place.”

Sunset grew quiet as she thought about this, wondering if Principal Celestia could be right.

“How can you be sure?” She questioned after a few minutes only to feel a hand rest along the scars on her back.

“Monsters don’t worry about being a monster nor do they regret what they have done.”

Sunset thought about this, it was true she did regret what she had done. Especially after the blast had made her feel every ounce of emotion she had locked away after coming to the human world.

“What do you think makes me have those nightmares then? I mean in most of them I turn into that demon and….I end up hurting everyone.” Sunset asked, turning her attention toward the woman who’s brow scrunched up in thought at that.

“I don’t know but I know someone who does. If you think you can trust me not to let you get hurt like you did with Discord.”

Celestia knew that this was a big thing to ask, especially after what had happened with Discord however to her surprise Sunset just nodded, her teal eyes boring into Celestia’s.

“I do trust you. More than I ever thought I’d trust anyone.”

Comments

[Vaguely Demented]

Ah, self medication. Always a tricky prospect. I used Benadryl as a sleep aid for close to a decade before studies showed it could have long term damage.

[Midnight_Song95]

9001672
same here. Frankly, I ended up taking too much when I was about 18-ish and ended up basically drunk. needless to say, that was the last time I tried to self-medicate and actually broke down and went to a doctor about my insomnia.

[Charli13]

And another amazing chapter glad to see sunset getting help with the medication

[Vaguely Demented]

9001684
I’ve been to several. Near as we can tell my body is on a 25 hour clock. Nothing can fix it but there are a few things I’ve tried that can at least mitigate some of the symptoms. Worst medication I tried was called Slow Niacin. It made me feel like I was getting a sunburn.

[Charli13]

midnight is online im ready lol

[Speedingninja]

Why didn’t she just tell me that she is having trouble sleeping? Why is she risk her health like this when she didn’t understand the consequences of what she was doing? Celestia wondered as she led the shamefaced girl out of the room and down the stairs.

You could argue that about your pony counterpart when she puts twilight in life threatening situations with out giving her context to the situation.

[ForNeverMore20]

“Sunset, you’re lucky that two tablets are only fifty milligrams and that is the full adult dose. You’re basically just drunk because your body isn't used to that high of a dose. We will talk about this later after you’re not groggy.”

She’s near to the age of a young adult, Tia. You don’t need to baby her.

[Bookwurm666]

9001672

9001684
Sleep aids don't do squat for me, I'll stick with warm milk.