983543 lol I kinda have to agree. Is it bad that I'm morbidly fascinated by this and where it's headed? Honestly, I write more than I read on here so I'm no expert but... wow. This was, I don't even have the words. Just wow....
My favorite part is how the protagonist has hands, but he also has a cutie mark. Is he a horse, or a human? The world may never know. Also ponies having breasts
I don't know what's worse. 1. The fact that I can read this perfectly fine. 2. The fact that it still makes no sense.
Your thoughts?
As for constructive criticism... I probably don't have anything to say that hasn't been said already, but I think the primary issue at hand is... Well, everything. The plot (if any) is atrocious. It gives no introduction to characters. It breaks the 4th wall without making sense. There are no quotation marks at all. There is (presumed) self-insertion. A heavy rewrite is in order, at the very least. However, I'll be nice. If you want help rewriting, pm me and I can give you advice and all that.
you know what? I don't hate this. I don't even dislike it. In fact, I like it. It's the bare minimum of HiE fics, the lowest of the low, and for that, I have to root for you. Good on you, author-guy. Good on you.
Angel is a boy, you know.
...
Weirdly enough, that's the one thing that I have a problem with.
God damn Ive never seen so many dislikes
This is a story so bad, it's actually good.
I'd like to see the other chapters.
983543 lol I kinda have to agree. Is it bad that I'm morbidly fascinated by this and where it's headed? Honestly, I write more than I read on here so I'm no expert but... wow. This was, I don't even have the words. Just wow....
forum.ge/uploads/post-50-1316287798.jpg
~Fecler
Okay, you have GOT to be trolling.
I refuse to acknowledge the possibility that I live in the same world as someone whose best effort produces...this.
Anyone else getting flashbacks to Half Life: Full Life Consequences? If you have not listened to the horrible glory
Or worse... DOOM: REPERCUSSIONS OF EVIL?! Again, for the uninitiated
This guy is yanking the chain of all of us, and considering the amount of thumbs down, he's got all of us.
981980 I find it odd that you actually type with decent grammar and spelling when you speak to people...
Is this a troll fic or are you semi-retarded?
981619
static.fjcdn.com/pictures/Quit+yo+bitchin_05fab8_3256397.jpeg
981628 Especially the plot e.deviantart.com/emoticons/moods/love/lust/aroused.gif
dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Octavia_plot.png
31 Dislikes away from shattering the 'Most dislikes for a fic' record. Good job buddy.
media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m7gc5fDac51rqlz5z.gif
media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m5th7kk8Pl1qca6l1.gif
media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lhxok7ACRM1qf4xss.gif
Enjoy the gifs buddy. They're the last clapping ones you'll ever see.
My favorite part is how the protagonist has hands, but he also has a cutie mark. Is he a horse, or a human? The world may never know. Also ponies having breasts
static.fjcdn.com/gifs/LOL_1b3158_1048126.gif
edit: please edit none of this. Let it be immortalized for what it is
I don't know what's worse.
1. The fact that I can read this perfectly fine.
2. The fact that it still makes no sense.
Your thoughts?
As for constructive criticism... I probably don't have anything to say that hasn't been said already, but I think the primary issue at hand is... Well, everything. The plot (if any) is atrocious. It gives no introduction to characters. It breaks the 4th wall without making sense. There are no quotation marks at all. There is (presumed) self-insertion. A heavy rewrite is in order, at the very least. However, I'll be nice. If you want help rewriting, pm me and I can give you advice and all that.
you know what? I don't hate this. I don't even dislike it. In fact, I like it. It's the bare minimum of HiE fics, the lowest of the low, and for that, I have to root for you. Good on you, author-guy. Good on you.
982502 982613 982795 982953
Sorry Canterlot Voice, I couldn't help myself...
[youtube=ClZVF7SYd8I]
I'm so sorry everyone...
985854
985854
The best reading ever! Hell, now I want to do a dramatic reading as well.
To the author: Keep Calm and Write On!
986126
Aheh, thanks!
Maybe it's something I can do again. But uh... no more sexual stuff. It's so uncomfortable to read aloud.
986580
Ahahaha, I see
Still, go on! Maybe we'll even need a 'Dramatic Readings' thread in the Writer's Group!
Reading this chapter reminds me of why I liked, favorited, and featured this fic on my user page.
Bravo, apple short! You're quickly becoming my fanfiction hero~
985854 Dear sweet Celestia... that was horrible to just listen to xD
This fic needs to live on in infamy!
Edit: This fiction made me laugh so much; apple short, you have my thumbs
apple short.
can you please never stop writing?
I NEED TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENS NEXT.
986825 this times infinity, there has to be a next chapter coming!
986629
If the king of trollfiction comments on this. this is by definition awesome.
You know what this is just so freaking terrible I'm going to stop paying taxes and go shoot a cop.
986825
987297 really not sure maybe lol chapter two was written before i submitted it or number one.
983449 really i thought because he was named angel it was a she ill fix that later when i get some time to.
987653
Naw, Angel can be a boy's name too
Like here's an Angel;
upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/f/f7/S101_Angel.png/250px-S101_Angel.png
And here's another Angel;
collegefashion.net/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/rent-angel.jpg
That's a lot of Angels, bro.
987605 Keep making these so people can make dramatic readings! You'll be remembered in this fandom for it!
987728
Here I thought we'd be stuck with only two chapters. Don't tell me I'm going to have to make another one!
987794 I hope you will make more; couldn't stop laughing after listening to it
985854 After HDD update i'm doing gmod visuals and NOBODY IS GOING TO STOP ME
I'm sorry, but we're gonna have to put ya down boy.
encrypted-tbn3.google.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRjtGmbdtiUR-MUECbLtrsr-cmEX6e6iTmDniGw3SjIbd6iJjuL
Your story is sicker than Ol' Yeller with rabies!
This is the best thing since sliced bread.