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Ponyville's first not-winter

Alright! It took some doing, but Ponyville will officially be winter-free this year. And you know what that means? I get to not wait three months before seeing Tank again! Sure, ponies aren't all that happy, but surely I can get them to see things my way.

Written for the "Rainbow Dash succeeds in stopping winter. This makes nopony happy, including Scootaloo." prompt in ScifiPony's Writer's Training Ground.

Chapters (1)

Comments ( 4 )

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superfun

superfun #1 · Apr 4th, 2017 · 1 · ·

This is a weird story for me, in that it's well written, and in-character for the ponies involved, yet I can't help but feel something is missing, but I can't quite put my finger on it.

DoContra

DoContra #2 · Apr 5th, 2017 · 1 · ·

8073723 That'd probably be an actual story (I've been correctly described by most of my humanities professors in high-school as "finds a minimal way of answering the test question/assignment, and then writes less than that"). For this fic, I just thought "Sabotaging the weather can't be the end of it" and got to work.

Glad to hear you liked the characterizations (the one thing I've paid attention to in my writing so far), and doubly glad you think it's well written!

scifipony

scifipony #3 · Apr 5th, 2017 · 1 · ·

8073723 I agree — that was in an interesting narrative voice. Why?
It's almost like RD is telling the story to an audience, or confessing it. I feel that comes from telling it mostly in first person present tense.
8074783 The story comes off as very ego-driven and self-conscious. Very much the way I think RD would story-tell in-character were she put on the spot. Good second story, there.

Alex Warlorn

Alex Warlorn #4 · Aug 16th, 2018 · · ·

What are the 'rules' anyway? I've never found a lot. Definitely an interesting tale, and completely told with Rainbow Dash's personality! And it seems NOT hibernating might have an adverse affect on Tank's health. And I love the little bit of reasoning in here!

Personally, I always be in the camp of, "So pegasi and Earth ponies can use their magic, but unicorns can't use theirs? That's racist!"