Chapter 12
There was a lull in the action while Prickly Pear prepared. Applejack, sitting on a low wooden bench beside Sumac, realised that this was a chance to have a good talk with the colt. She wasn’t so sure if Big Mac had good, proper talks with Sumac about anything other than construction, farming, and roleplaying.
That was okay though, Big Mac kept Sumac’s head screwed on straight for the most part.
“Sumac Apple… tell me what you see when you look at Pebble.”
“Um… what am I supposed to see?”
Chewing on her lip for a moment, Applejack tried another angle of approach on what was sure to be a tough subject. “Sumac, that fillyfriend of yours… she’s high strung and she has herself a few problems. She has her father’s fragile ego. Now… Tarnish’s ego… well, it’s got him into some trouble, and the same thing goes for Pebble.”
Sighing, Applejack just spit out what needed to be said with no care for how she was saying it. “Sumac, your fillyfriend thinks that she is a fat little hambeast. Now, tell me, what do you see when you look at her? Be honest, now, this is important and I’ll be upset with you if’n you ain’t honest.”
“She’s chubby,” Sumac whispered to Applejack, “but that’s okay, I like chubby.”
“You scruffy little chubby chaser.” Applejack smiled, adjusted her hat, and continued, “Now, listen here, colt… she don’t see herself as being chubby. She’s not happy with how she is, not at all. And it’s gonna fall on you to help her through those rough moments she’s bound to have.”
“I sorta figured that out on my own.”
“Hmm, I done reckon you did. You ain’t stupid, Sumac Apple. Now, you sit back and you listen to me, and I’ll tell you what you can do to help her…”
Standing with the other contestants, Pebble watched and waited. Prickly Pear was ancient, old, and the undisputed master of Shatterstone. As such, Pebble both loved him and hated him. Loved him, because she admired his work—Pebble had an almost religious reverence for his work—and hated him, because there was no way to beat him.
Whatever colour he had once been was now gone, and his hide was a faded, sunbleached grey. Most of his mane was gone and only a few white strands could be seen on his crest. Pebble knew his history, the story of his life, she had read every word printed about him.
He had started as a miner of exceptional skill, a digger that could burrow into any mountain. With but a punch he could open an entire mineshaft, smashing his way in, and all that had to be done afterwards was clear away the rubble. In time, he had learned the art, and thus, a legend had been born.
Now, there were shrines scattered around Equestria’s southwest that were dedicated to Prickly Pear, and Pebble had visited a few. He was ensconced as a figure of significance to the earth ponies of Equestria. Mothers brought him their foals, hoping for some sort of blessing, and lovers-to-be came to him to be married with the hopes that he would bestow upon them a blessed, prosperous union.
With a gasp, Pebble released the breath that she hadn’t been aware that she was holding and watched as Prickly Pear drew back his hoof. For being so old, so ancient, he had remarkable balance, he was a figure of marvellous kinesthetic perfection. The old earth pony moved with an exquisite slowness…
“Kai-yee!”
Whatever happened was invisible to the naked eye. A shock wave radiated outwards, blowing off hats and bonnets. Little squiggles of blue light danced in the air in a wide radius. The sound was deafening and there could be no doubt that it could be heard from miles away. The block of pale pink marble suffered a radical transformation, and dust poured from it like a liquid.
A statue of an alicorn stood where the block of pale pink marble once stood and Pebble felt her heart leap up into her throat, choking her. Even from where she stood, she could see the details of the feathers, the graceful curves of wings unfurling, and she knew right away that she was looking at a near-perfect likeness of Princess Celestia. Even her serene, beatific smile could be seen. It was all too perfect.
Prickly Pear staggered backwards on three legs, clutching his barrel, and he let out a gasp. His eyes went wide as he looked up at the statue he had freed from the stone, and his lips moved as he said words that nopony heard. His face sagged in an odd way, almost like melting wax, and his left eye went bloodshot. A thin ribbon of scarlet poured from his left nostril and the left side of his body went limp, causing his legs on his left side to collapse beneath him.
He fell over onto the platform and did not move.
“Holy alicorn shit, I think he’s dead!”
As one life ended, another began. Watching with eager anticipation, Pinkie Pie attended a very special birthday party. Some foals were just so impatient, and this one demanded to be born right now. There was no time to get the mother to the town’s clinic—Appleloosa still wasn’t big enough for an actual hospital—so now there was a very special birthday party with hundreds of ponies in attendance.
What a special, lucky little foal.
Applejack, sitting in the dust, held the mare’s head and stroked her mane. Braeburn, who had a knack for showing up just when he was needed, he had brought the nurse, and somepony was off looking for the doctor. Pinkie, being the helpful sort that she was, sat down in the dirt beside Applejack and let the mare hold her fetlock.
Sumac, who had tried to flee the area, now found himself held by Rainbow Dash, who had him in a very firm and unyielding hug. The colt’s face had turned a peculiar shade of green that clashed with his green eyes. For Sumac, fillies and mares were for fantasising what he wanted to put in them, and he didn’t want to think about what came out of them. That was unpleasant and no doubt, it was going to be very, very difficult to fantasise about what he wanted to stick into Pebble after this.
Up on the stage, a blanket had been laid over the late Prickly Pear and the only pony not watching the birth was Pebble, who sat hunched over beside the still corpse of her beloved idol, looking very sad indeed. Her ears hung limp and she sat on her chubby plot with her front hooves held pressed together, a look of infinite sorrow upon her face.
The mother to be screamed bloody murder and Sumac Apple, his eyes wide, tossed his cookies down into the dirt as Rainbow Dash clapped him on the back. Pinkie Pie squirmed as her fetlock was being squeezed—from happiness or pain it was impossible to tell—and Applejack continued to try and offer a little comfort. Rarity fainted dead away and Fluttershy fanned the unresponsive fashionista with her wing, trying to revive her.
Life went on…
A very sweaty Pinkie Pie had a horrible squishy feeling in her barrel that grew to be unbearable as she looked at her niece. During the commotion, Pebble had been a bit… neglected, and now, Pinkie Pie was wondering what soul shredding guilt felt like. Probably a lot like the horrible squishy feeling that she had in her barrel right now.
It was quiet, the crowd had cleared, Prickly Pear’s corpse was gone, and all that was left was Pebble Pie, sitting on the stage, all alone with the pale pink statue of Princess Celestia. A bright orange ribbon sat on the ground beside Pebble, and for whatever reason, she did not know why she felt this way, Pinkie worried that the ribbon would blow away.
Treading across the platform, Pinkie approached Pebble, and then eased her bulk down to sit beside her niece. She picked up the ribbon, which was face down, and had a look. Honourable mention: technical perfection. Sighing, Pinkie Pie felt a crushing sadness without understanding why she was feeling it.
“Pebble, your ribbon, it’ll blow away if you aren’t careful with it,” Pinkie said, trying to start a conversation with her sorrowful looking niece.
“I don’t care,” Pebble replied in deadpan, “I didn’t win. It’s just some worthless reminder that I didn’t win. I just wasn’t good enough.”
“Oh.” Pinkie felt something heavy press down on her and she tucked the ribbon away in her mane for safe keeping. “Pebble, doesn’t achieving technical perfection mean something to you?”
“It didn’t mean anything to the judges…” There was a faint gurgle from Pebble’s stomach and it sounded as though she was choking a bit on her own words. “They picked stuff that was pretty, stuff that looks good. That’s all that matters in life, being pretty. If you’re not pretty, the best you can hope for is an honourable mention.”
Reaching up with her forelegs, Pebble began scrubbing at her eyes, and her whole body began hitching. Pinkie Pie, not knowing what to do, put a foreleg over Pebble’s withers and pulled the filly closer. Sitting beneath the stony gaze of Princess Celestia’s statue, Pinkie suffered through yet another moment of being an aunt, a moment that she was ill-prepared for.
“I’m not pretty,” Pebble moaned, her voice cracking. “I’m fat and disgusting! My whole life is going to be an honourable mention!” With that, Pebble collapsed against her aunt and began blubbering.
With her niece wailing, Pinkie Pie found herself in over her head once more, and she didn’t know how to make this better. She didn’t know how to make Pebble smile. Sniffling, a few of Pinkie’s curls went limp, and she squeezed Pebble even tighter, trying to comfort herself. As her curls lost their bounce, a bright orange ribbon poked out and stood out in sharp contrast against Pinkie’s vivid pink mane.
With a wry smile, Rainbow Dash set down two bottles of sarsaparilla on the table and gave Sumac a nod. Little wisps of smoke-like vapour rose from the necks of the bottles and Rainbow Dash sat down in a wooden chair opposite of Sumac. Reaching out, she slid a bottle over to Sumac, smiled, and pulled her own bottle closer.
Sumac, still looking a little green, wiped his muzzle with one foreleg and lifted up the bottle with the other. As he held it in his fetlock, he gave the bottle a curious look, and then he focused on Rainbow Dash, who was making herself comfortable in her chair.
“What’s this about?” Sumac asked.
Lifting her head, Rainbow replied, “We’re celebrating.”
Sumac looked around the saloon and his ear twitched in time to the piano music. “We are?” After a moment he added, “What are we celebrating?”
“Yes we are.” Rainbow Dash took a sip from her bottle, tipping it back, and her throat bulged as she had herself a refreshing drink. She then raised her bottle to Sumac and said, “We’re celebrating that today, you are now a stallion, and you deserve to have a drink with a mare like me, ‘cause I’m awesome and good looking.”
Confused, Sumac’s head tilted off to one side. “I’m a stallion now?”
“Yes you are!” Rainbow Dash’s eyes glittered with gleeful playfulness.
“I don’t get it.” Shaking his head, Sumac’s eyes focused on the bottle he was holding.
“I’m gonna talk to you like an adult,” Rainbow Dash said to Sumac, “because you are one now. Well, adult enough for this talk, anyway.”
“Okay.”
Leaning forwards, Rainbow Dash’s playful expression vanished. She now looked very serious, and Sumac, a little scared, slouched down in his chair as he felt Rainbow Dash’s eyes penetrating into his very soul. He held his bottle close, clutching it, and he doubted that he was the adult that Rainbow thought him to be.
“Sumac,” Rainbow Dash began, “you just took your first real step towards being a good stallion, the right kind of stallion. The best kind. For the first time, you’ve realised that a mare is more than your spunk receptacle. She’s more than just a fantasy for you to wank off to or use to scratch your itch. You’re a smart one, Sumac Apple, and I’m betting that what you just saw is gonna change you.”
Eyes narrowing behind his round glasses, Sumac gave thought to Rainbow’s words.
“You’re being raised by three mares that love you and adore you, and I know they think you’re innocent, but I know you and I’ve been watching you. I see everything, Sumac Apple, I am one observant pegasus, and I know what you do in the apple orchard when you think nopony is watching.”
Sumac’s ears turned reddish pink, standing out in contrast to the greenish tinge still seen upon his face.
“It’s fine to do that. Heck, I do that every chance I get. It feels good, it’s good cardio, and I see it as part of my workout routine.” Rainbow Dash waved her bottle around as she made a gesture, and a serious smile could be seen upon her face. “There is nothing wrong with what you are doing and it’s perfectly natural. But things can go wrong if you try to treat the real thing as you would your fantasy. That’s where a lot of males screw up, and they treat mares more like masturbatory toys than living, breathing ponies, who have feelings, needs, and fantasies of their own.”
Squeaking, Sumac slumped down in his chair just a little bit more.
“Mares bear the consequences, too,” Rainbow Dash continued. “Sure, you can just climb right on and scratch your itch, and that’s gonna happen soon, I don’t care how innocent and sweet the others think you are… I know differently.” Grinning, Rainbow returned to making her point. “Once you scratch that itch, you’re free to go your own way. But Pebble”—here, Rainbow paused and her grin vanished as she became quite stern and solemn—“or Olive, or Silver Lining… don’t you dare look surprised, I told you I see everything!”
Sumac gulped.
“The point I’m trying to make is, the females in your life are more than warm, wet, willing holes for you to scratch your itch with. You can keep up the sweet and innocent act with the others all you want, but I’m onto you, and I’m gonna keep you accountable, because you are my friend. I know for certain that at some point, you’re going to bang one of them like a screen door, or maybe all three of them, and that’s fine too, and I’ll even give you some pointers to keep everything nice and fun… but you are going to be responsible… I am more than willing to be your wingpony and help you out, but I swear to Princess Cadance, if you fronk this up, I’m gonna be the one to make you regret it. Got it?”
With a squeak, Sumac nodded.
“Now, you can’t exactly go and ask your mothers for rubbers, because let’s face it, you wouldn’t survive whatever would happen next. Out of all of the dangers you’ve faced, and there’s been quite a few, those three mares would be your undoing. I’m thinking that Twinkleshine would be the one that ends you. She values your innocence the most, but Lemon Hearts, we all know what happens when she loses her shit.”
Again, Sumac nodded and he clutched his bottle in mortal terror. All lived in fear of Lemon Heartless, and for good reason. The colt shuddered.
“So…” Rainbow Dash popped her lips and her ears pivoted around a bit as she considered her next words. “So… when the time is right and you plan to lay some pipe into a willing, consenting partner, you come and you find me, and I’ll hook you up with what you need so you can have your fun, consequence free. You got me?”
“Yes,” Sumac replied, sounding as though he was five years old again.
“Good.” Rainbow nodded. “Now, I am going to talk to you about the H.A.L.T. rule and I’m going to teach you the super-secret sexual sorcery that is consent. Consent is a special form of magic all its own, and it is powerful, sexy magic. Now, listen up and pay attention, ‘cause I’m gonna lay some heavy stuff on ya, Sumac Apple…”
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Rainbow sharing some wisdom. Awesome.
There's either a full stop or a comma too much.
I wonder what Pebble thinks of Olive after all those years.
Is this a potential Herd in the making I see?
7948695
Or, you know, just a horny colt that likes to shout the names of his friends at the worst possible moment.
Every guy needs a Rainbow to remind them of these simple truths. Too many men have spent so much time fantasizing that they have forgotten to separate their fictions from reality.
Now this is my kind of Valentine's Day read. It's blunt and awkward, just like love.
...you forgot the kitchen sink.
7948732
A sink cannot offer consent.
7948699
Ah. I did wonder.
7948733
Ah, but if you use a come to life spell and give it enough knowledge that it can give or deny consent then it could.
Rainbow Dash, the pony spy satellite.
7948742
And when it orgasms, the garbage disposal comes on.
It is a little disturbing that RD would hang out and watch Sumac while he's otherwise "engaged". Sounds like it's happened a few times. She probably means well.
Well, probably...
7948753
Or, you know, she's flying over to bug Applejack and there he is, off in the orchard, practicing his telekinetic technique.
And then there was the time that Rainbow Dash was napping in one of Applejack's trees, as she is wont to do, and then she hears this sound...
How is anything with "perfection" right there in its name only worth an honorable mention?
7948753
Rainbow Dash sees everything that goes on in Ponyville whether she wants to or not.
Was that statue Pear's Magnus Opum? Cause if not, that sucks on multiple levels.
And what was with the birth? That came from nowhere, and I honestly am still very confused.
And R.D. Is laying it on thick! She ain't messing around
7948746 Well thanks for THAT horror story idea.... *shudders*
Ah Rainbow Dash the uncle/aunt who doesn't live in a dream world that helps you out buy keeping you safe AND hooking you up with the knowledge you need to get you some.
7948971
Big burst of magic... Sometimes it brings friends together. Other times, it causes births.
7949024 ... I'm still lost.
I expect Pinkie Pie or Applejack will come looking for Sumac, to get an explanation as to why he wasn't comforting Pebble.
When that reckoning happens, I'm hoping Rainbow Dash will be there, to say that Sumac's been training with her.
7949027
On phone. Laying down. Big punch. Big magic. Side effects. Birth happens.
7949058 So some unamed character just entered labor when Pear made his statue? That's all we'll hear of that?
Okay.
My Little Pony: Sex Ed is Magic
Damn Rainbow is really on a roll here. First she comforts Twilight, then she supports Pebble, and now she gives Sumac a good talking to of his desires and safety.
She is truly a loyal friend
7949061
Do you need a novel?
7949102 ... WHAT!?!?
And no, im actually reading one now.
7949104
A mare was startled into foaling by a big bang. It really is that simple. I honestly do not understand how this is even an issue.
7949117 oh. Yup, definitely over thinking it. Sorry.
7949100
Each character has played into their element, for good or bad during this story.
Rainbow has been loyal.
Applejack has been honest.
Fluttershy has been kind, even if it is the hard kindness that her friends need.
Rarity has been generous.
Pinkie Pie is feeling the effects of being a party pony.
And Twilight, Twilight has been on the receiving end of friendship this entire story if you've been paying attention. She is reaping the rewards of cultivating good friends.
I think that the foaling was a bit random there, but I think it's good that Rainbow Dash forced Sumac to stay and watch. It's good for Sumac to see the real consequences of sex, to know that this is what would happen if he's not careful. It's also great to see Rainbow Dash be a responsible adult, telling him not only about the importance of consent, but also giving him a way to get condoms when the need arises.
7949035
Sumac tossed his cookies a few times and Rainbow Dash hauled him off. (Obviously) He was in no condition to refuse her.
Rainbow is also being a bit more of a realist. Really it is safer to assume Sumac is going to get sexually involved sooner rather than later--he already came extremely close to having sex already, he has a earth pony filly friend who being an earth pony gets really horny when under stress and has more reason to feel stressed than 99% of ponies her age, he has a unicorn friend who literally tried to lay down her life for him at one point out of devotion to him, and he thinks he is regularly surrounded by adults who enjoy more herd like relationships which would likely lead him to feel no real conflicts having deep relationships with more than one mare. Heck most of the adults seem fairly unfazed by the fact that Sumac and Pebble are willing to make sexually suggestive jokes in front of them and treat it as if any other adult in their group made such jokes.
It is really safer to just assume it is an inevitability than he will be sexually active soonercrather than later. Rainbow is just doing her part to keep him responsible with all these things in mind. She is loyal to her friends which include smSumac and she has a lot more practical intelligence than she is given credit for. I think Trixie might have similar views as Rainbow even if Lemon and Twinkle would freak out.
Since we already are on the topic, as a pharmacist I have to ask - how safe is the pony version of the contraceptive pill? A similar Pearl Index to the human version, or does magic and earth pony fertility play a role in the Weedverse?
7949181
I've actually thought this far ahead and have a few notes about the subject.
Trixie still regularly snuggles Sumac any chance she can get, and she'll run him down and catch him if she has to. Being asexual, Trixie hasn't thought of Sumac having sexual interest even once. She still thinks of him as being wholly and completely innocent. Trixie is, of course, making a mistake of perception here, and she is also willingly wearing blinders as she wades into the waters of that river in Africa.
Sumac, being the canny little grifter that he is, actually behaves differently around Trixie than he does the other adults around him, and cultivates his innocent, sweet equona. He still wants to be his mother's colt, and is terrified that there relationship will change.
7949193
Magic plays a part.
I had an aunt like Rainbow Dash. I miss her.
Lemon Heartless? That's somewhat concerning.
7949369
As I said yesterday in one of the new chapters, do not piss off someone who is nice or kind as they are the most terrifying when angered. I even showed what Doctor Who did to The Family as an Example.
7948699
Come on Sumac, basic stealth!
This was very satisfying to read, juxtapositions on juxtapositions, a good symmetry.
Sumac: Wait, you do realize that while you keep me hear for a talk we could have in the hotel, I can't go talk to Pebble and cheer her up?
Dash: Oh, right. Yeah, you should probably get on with that.
EDIT: I would like to clear up before someone tries to cut my head off through the screen of my laptop that I understand the importance of making Sumac understand that Pebble and the rest of his possible harem are more than just masturbation fodder and virginity-killers, but Sumac's been doing the emotional support thing for a long time now (I assume, which I hope doesn't make an ass out of me) and that really is kind of important for someone with an ego as fragile as Pebble's.
7949711
Eh, Pebble needs her aunt. And truth be told, Pinkie kinda needs her niece right now.
7949717 Hmm. She could have support from more than one pony, though.
7949145 If you been hitting that rum hard enuff!
How bout this oldie, Aunty (Apple) Jack
She'll come round an' rip your bloody fetlocks off!
7949961
Wut?
7949972 Sorry had a low sugar Aussie reminisce from the 70's. Seriously messed up decade.
Aaaaah best way to make sure your kids avoid sex a little longer. Give them the means and explain ABSOLUTELY everery....single...detail.
7949972 So there's a Celaeno in the new MLP movie.
vignette1.wikia.nocookie.net/mlp/images/d/d6/Zoe_Saldana_as_Captain_Celaeno.png/revision/latest?cb=20170212012232
And so once again, Rainbow Dash shows herself to be The Best. Seriously, these are some straight facts of life that everyone could stand to hear when they're young. Mind you, Rainbow's being pretty cool about the fact that she's clearly seen more than she probably wanted to.
I can't help thinking of Spike again. A prolonged childhood means that there's a very real chance that he'll never get to have deeper conversations like this with his closest friends. Even if he makes friends with other kids, they'll continue to mature while he can't. At least there's an upside to Twilight's longevity in that regard. Having Boomer around will help, too.
Mind you, I am clearly overthinking this. Something that has never before happened while reading a story in the Weedverse.
What I like most right now is that a lot of people would probably spend the rest of this trip treating Sumac and Pebble almost like convicted felons. Instead, we have Applejack and a surprise entrant Rainbow Dash being cool and understanding about this, giving conversations that need to be had. Of course, Applejack's talk with Sumac ended up being somewhat superfluous, but she still made the effort, and I appreciate that.
I feel for Pebble. Luckily, she has a father who understands what it's like to be talented in an unconventional way.
Lastly, props for narrative construction. Rainbow Dash's whole H.A.L.T. thing and feelings about consent was established earlier at a time where it made sense to, which made her conversation with Sumac feel much more natural. I'm not saying it would've been bad otherwise, but it would've felt a bit out of nowhere. Good work on that one.