Closet pegasister. Lover of chickens, parties, derping, and of course DJ PON-3
Six ordinary highschoolers get drunk and die in a car crash. But when god gives them a second chance in another world he created called Equestria because of their strong friendship, can they save their new home or will they be sent back to hell? When faced with Discord's brother, Nightmare Moon and Celestia and Luna's father, it might take more than friendship. Slight gore in fight scenes.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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my reaction after reading the description
Read the description, but I didn't read the story.
Sounds worse than Sonic the Hedgehog fan-fiction.
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Dude... have you read anything even related to HiEs on this site?
Really?
REALLY?!
...Really?
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Have a tip that I picked up a while back.
If you're going to write about characters that have the exact same personalities/abilities as the Mane Six, then you might as well just write about the Mane Six. Other than that, you also have the standard Mary Sue-ness that comes with any HiE story (Three teenagers can influence divine will?). As for chapter length, since you asked, 2155 isn't that bad, but it's also not great. Most stories of this magnitude exceed 3000 per chapter.
But, on the upside, your grammar is just fine, and you seem capable of describing a scene. You just need better subject matter.
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er.
Someone make another story about humans going to Equestria after dying in a car crash. I dare you. I TRIPLE DOG DARE YOU motherf
If you're interested in improving your stories from people working to help new writers, you should really check this out.
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i thought it was good. sometimes the start of a story is hard to make original but when you keep writing and continue with a story it develops its own personality. in other words it BECOMES original. it doesnt have to start that way. :)
i agree with nonameknight i think its good and its like a saying i once herd the start of an original never sees at first but sees in the next.....