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Hey Hey Hey, Stay Out of My Head!

Fluttershy doesn't want to go through the pain of loving someone, and eventually having to let them go. So instead of loving, she commits to killing. Anypony she falls in love with, or falls in love with her, she brutally murders, no matter how innocent they may be. Of course, no one suspects a thing from the kindest pony in Equestria. But when a certain mare shows her the joy of love, she opens up about everything.

Chapters (1)

Comments ( 2 )

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Ragnar100

Ragnar100 #1 · Apr 22nd, 2015 · 1 · ·

Speaking as someone who hates these kinds of stories about murderous killing ponies with a gore tag, I must say the first chapter isn't so bad. If I had read the first chapter without checking the tags or the description I would probably continue reading the story. There really isn't much wrong about the first chapter, it does lack a strong hook to get the readers and none of the friends should be shocked over a sleep over, seriously that was already an episode in season 1 with rarity and applejack having a sleepover at Twilight's due to a storm and this is after season 4 so it shouldn't be too much of a shock/surprise that Twilight would want to have a sleepover with them, but otherwise it seems fairly alright.
I might check again later if I end up curious over how the story goes, but for now the first chapter is an alright start.

Dashie4Life

Dashie4Life #2 · Apr 22nd, 2015 · · ·

5893137 Thank you very much! Yes, the shock was a bit of a stretch. I'll most likely fix that up later. The other chapters will be more gory, but I didn't want it to start out gory. Your praise means everything to me! And I'm happy to hear what I could have done better. Thanks again!