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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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“To be honest, it kind of lost its charm when it gouged the roof of my mouth and I started bleeding."
I can't stop laughing!
Nice story man! Keep it up!
Oh that Luna!
images3.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20111104021523/gyropedia/images/7/75/Shrugpony-luna2.png
Woah, some interesting developments are about to happen. I wonder what happens to AppleDash. Maybe make Applejack get found out and go into exile from her family. It would be an interesting plot twist. Depression would set in, and then the real fun with this clopfic would start. And you'd get to play around with Applejacks' and Rainbow's reactions. Overall a change that would spice things up. And the CMC would try to fix things themselves, understanding the full extent of what they had done.
"unlike Ruby, who’s dreams were plagued with Spike making fun of her and rejecting her."
Should be 'whose dreams'.
But otherwise another fantastic chapter.
*LE GASP* THEY ARE GOING TO BREAK A PINKIE PROMISE! *Pinkie pops up from a bush* (you broke a Pinkie Promise)>
I refreshed this page almost every 5 minutes today waiting for this chapter. The storru is excellent so far, it's now my 2nd favorite story of all time. If it keeps on going this good, it will beat bittersweet for #1
"Ooh, they're using the Pinkie Promise. They mean business."
Shit just got real.
Oh God, another CMC invasion of personnal privacy, this will only end terribly.... followed by a wholesome lesson about personnal space
YOU BROKE A PINKIE PROMISE!
Luna? hahahahahaha Ending was best part!
Oh yeah the CMC are spicing up the story. ;) It was intresting to see Applebloom to be bossy with her big sister.
Pinnkie's radar tail was an awsome idea too. I really like in your story that you handle the all thing in more complex way then other authos do in their stories I have been read yet. I mean you don't skip the CMC from the story and I can't wait to see how they'll react to what they'll discover since they all will be effected by that. I wonder what Scootaloo will think and say once she finds out that her ideal is dating with AJ.
Twirity
Flutterpie
Appledash
So much filly fooling I can't stand it! But I want moar! Keep it up!
624530 I think you need to add Lunestia.
LUNA y u so evil?
CMC Y u break pinkie promise
625096 I doubt they're gonna be paired off together. Although I'm not holding off the possibility and I'd be super disappointed if it does happen. (hint hint)
625096 YES. Unfortunately, there is no luna emoticon.. THAT MUST BE CORRECTED.
Okay, just read through all the updates I had to catch up on. And I can tell the following:
There are already cracks in each relationship, which is a good sign for the story plot's sake
There are minor grammar errors (for example 'the the') but are not even close to damaging.
So far there's still a lot of tension, which is highly interesting and keeps the ultimate ending unpredictable.
Suddenly the princesses comes into the end of each chapter, which has potential for several outcomes in future updates.
The story in general seems to be going on for a good while longer, and that makes me happy.
But to be honest, the thing I'm looking most forward to is when Spike eventually have to confront Twilight and Rarity. And minding how influenced Twilight already seems to be of her newfound lover..... well, let's just say that a massacre of emotions is brewing up.
Good job, mate! Don't stop writing for the love of Luna
626118 If you let me know where the errors are, I will correct them. I wish I had time to scope them out myself, but I find it very helpful when readers come up with things to fix for me. Call it laziness if you will but that's my modus operandi.
627421 just go through you three latest chapters and hit ctrl+F. Then type 'the the' and you will find them. I can't remember exactly which ones, but I do recall it was you most recent ones...
How come each relationship has somepony that isn't emotionally stable?
627846 Well, seeing how there are six people, if he didn't do it that way, only one pair would be free of that, and still, one pair would have double... so idk how that works... unless you want it ex mane six...
i love this little story collection!
i can not the idea out of my head that luna is just acting dumb so celestia will touch her ahaha
627451 Well, I fixed one instance in Chapter 9. Hopefully that helps!
I am REALLY sad that Rarity sorta just destroyed all progress Spike has made and that Spike is going through shit while everybody else is fucking and having a good time. Probably because Spike is my favourite and I'm a Sparity supporter, but... well...
Still good.
PINKIE WHY YOU HELP GIRLS SNOOP!?!?!?!?!
“That’s because you’re trying to shove your hoof into that hole,”
Laughed my ass off
625232 I read it as joke. "The waiter flew toward the table." in this context sounds like an expression for swiftly moving across. That's how I read it anyway, and then I recall chuckling when it explained how the waiter was a pegasus.
Oooh...Friend Zone.
That must hurt.
Damn Applebloom. Snoop much?
“I don’t get it,” Luna asked. Suddenly, a royal guard walked into the room.
I can only hear this as two best friends play.
Y'think after a thousand years of isolation, Luna would have this nailed.
700226
I think she is shitting Celestia for the lulz.
And again that bit with Lulu and celestia!
Oh, Spike... You cruel friend-zoner. You really should have kept your options open, buddy!
Okay didn't the CMC learn anything about privacy, well they will really learn after breaking that Pinkie Promise
You characterize the CMC perfectly. That is to say, I want to wring their little necks right now.
i788.photobucket.com/albums/yy162/Awesomelazer/1253485003629.jpg
856597 oh bummer i wanted to see your pic. ............ oh um that sounded wrong im so stupid (kill me now)
pinkie is gona be PISSED when she finds out the CMC broke a pinkie promise!
OMG my mom is forcing me to go to bed! I want to keep reading! WHY MOM WHY!!!
2299325Aren't you a little young to be reading this if your mom is forcing you to go to bed?
Sex ed for Lulu! I find this story rather incredible. I can't wait to keep reading this!
2442611
Why yes, yes she is.
CMC gonna learn not to break a Pinkie promise
they are breaking a pinkie promise NOT GOOD!!!!
Why would a Royal Guard walk into a bedroom without permission and out of nowhere...?