The Power Of Magic And A Human
---------- Ponyville, 5 Minutes and a brisk walk with laughing fillies later ----------
I think I am going to need to go to the hospital for cuteness disease because I am pretty sure these three fillies have infected me. For five whole minutes during our brief walk all I have gotten out of them is giggles, tail wagging, cheek nuzzles, head rubs, and adorable commentary at their new height. Thanks to them distracting me I had failed to notice the library which came into view until now. I stopped in my tracks and my eyes became glued to the building in front of me and all I could think to say was “Wow”.
The 'library' was in fact a HUGE CASTLE in a tree! Except the tree itself seemed to be made out of crystal and it shined in the sunlight but it did not blind me as I stared at the beauty of it. When I finally made my way to the top I saw a huge star that matched the symbol on Twilight, which reminds me to ask about that later and why the CMC do not have them. Could the symbols be cutie marks? I'll ask later when I stop gawking at the castle made out of a crystal tree.
All senses left me as I continued to stare until finally I noticed Twilight staring at me, that and the multiple pokings upon my face courtesy of the three fillies. I finally blinked and sported a sheepish smile “S-sorry about that Princess, it's just that when you said library I was expecting a normal, old, and probably plain building and not a crystal castle in a tree!” I exclaimed as the excitement in my voice grew and grew but this made Twilight frown a little.
“Sorry about that Adrian, it's just that I am used to calling it my library and not used to calling it the castle yet ever since it magically grew.” she said plainly but that last bit made me take a step back.
“WHAT?! You mean that Crystal Castle grew OUT OF the ground?!? And with MAGIC? But....how....what....I mean.....duhhh” the words flew carelessly out of my mouth before they became gibberish and my face contorted to one full of confusion which promptly got a laugh out of all four girls.
Twilight spoke up once she had her fill of laughs “Yeah, crazy stuff happens here all the time but I’m sure you have had your share of crazy magic happenings back on Earth, right?” she asked with a normal face and a smile which just made my confused face even more confused.
After a brief moment “No, I don't. We don't have magic back on Earth.” I said which caused all four to drop their jaws in disbelief and I could feel their stares radiating at me.
“You mean none of you can do any sort of magic whatsoever?!” Sweetie Bell said in an alarmed tone, to which I responded with a gentle nodding of my head, careful not to knock her off of her spot.
“But how do ya do stuff then?! What if something is too tall for ya to reach or too high to get to? Oh, wait! I guess whose with wings do that sorta thing right?” Applebloom asked.
“Nope, we do everything by hand or with the help of machines. No humans on earth posses magic or wings, I guess we are all kinda like earth ponies.” I calmly explained which just made the girls eyes bug out even more.
“NO WINGS?!? But....but....that sounds so boring! How do you travel or do anything then?!” Scootaloo said in a mixture of disbelief and confusion.
I slightly chuckled at this “Well like I said, we have machines and tools to help us. Traveling we use cars, trains, airplanes, and boats to get to pretty much everywhere that walking can't.” I stopped for a moment to think “Um, cars for us are like carriages for you here except they drive themselves with us steering them and controlling how fast or slow they go.” I explained.
Once I got done talking I was met the sound of silence as all of them let this new information sink in, but after a minute or so Twilight stepped forward “So Earth has absolutely no magic at all?” she worryingly asked but I nodded my head in response “Oh, I see. That seems so sad. But how do you defend yourselves in case somepo... ahem something attacks?” she curiously asked.
I froze for a moment and thought how to answer but I could not find a nice way to answer and my face went numb as I frowned “Princess Twilight.....I....I do not wish to answer that right now. If you heard how we, the human race, responds then you might think less of us.....less of me.” I responded with a very sad tone “Is that alright for now?” I pleaded.
Twilight saw that my face was filled with pain and sadness and quickly trotted over to me and place a hoof on my upper leg “That is quite alright Adrian, I do not wish to pressure you. Although that makes me even more curious and worried but I will respect your wishes.” she said with a kind and reassuring smile “For now lets get inside” she added. When she finished she took a few steps back and quickly her horn glowed and her entire body vanished! But before I could ponder where she went I saw the front doors open inward and saw her standing there “Well come on you slowpokes!” she said with a laugh.
I smiled as I walked over to the doors and just before I went inside I slowly set the three fillies down one by one, which of course got grunts of disappointment “Don't worry, if we have time later then you three can show me around town and back in your spots, ok?” I playfully said which got three huge grins in reply before they quickly ran off inside the crystal corridors. I stared again at the beautiful design of the hallways before I heard Twilight cough to get my attention.
“Well come one! And be sure to close the doors on your way in please!” she asked politely. I nodded and I made to take my first step inside before I heard something above me.
“WATCH OUT BELOW!” a voice said as I saw a shape fall towards me but before I could respond the same thing crashed down on me and once again I found myself on the ground with something laying on my chest while I saw stars dancing around my head.
“Not again!” I heard Twilight call out before I heard the sound of approaching hoofs on crystal and in a few moments Twilight had reached me “Are you all right Adrian?” she asked with concern. I groggily nodded my head as my sight returned to normal before I looked at who had crashed into me and this time it was only one instead of three.
I saw that laying dazed on my chest but a gray pony with yellow hair and I think her mark is bubbles. The pony groaned and sat up and shaked it head before opening its eyes, to which I saw two yellow eyes that were crossed and were now looking at me in confusion. “Derpy, you need to learn to be more careful! As a mail mare you could accidentally destroy someponies package you know” Twilight said in a gentle but stern tone. So I guess all mares have this same general body shape, but until I see some stallions to compare I will keep on open mind.
The mare looked down and her eyes drooped a bit “I'm sorry, I just don't know what went wrong! I was flying perfectly then I saw this strange creature walking with three fillies on top then next thing I knew I was flying in circles and zig zags! Then I crashed” she looked up at me and stared at me for a few moments “What are you anyway?” she said.
I stared for a few moments longer than I should of before I shook my head, I hope she did not think I was being rude for staring at her eyes, “My name is Adrian and I am a human. Nice to meet you” I polity said as I partially stuck out my hand since she was so close.
She looked at my hand for a second before realizing what I was doing and she smiled “Hello Adrian the human! My name is Derpy Hooves!” she said as she shook my hand then dropped it “Are you sure your ok?”
I smiled “Yeah, I’ll be fine. What about you though? Are you ok?” I asked worryingly which got a small blush from her.
“Yeah, I-I'll be fine. I'm used to it by now” she responded and looked down in disappointment which made me worry a bit.
“Whats wrong?” I asked again.
She sighed “It's nothing, it's just I am used to crashing and worrying ponies since my eyes are messed up. I have to concentrate to fly straight and I know this but once I got distracted I messed up. Like I always do” she said in such a sad tone and she let out of few sniffles. I instantly lifted my hand up and rested it on her head and using my fingers I scratched her ear while using my thumb to pet her mane which startled her for a split second before I felt her slightly relax.
“It's alright Derpy, everyone has something they don't like about themselves. It is just unfortunate that yours causes you a bit of trouble but that is alright. You know why?” I gently asked, which made her look at me with a few tears and she shook her head “Because from I can tell you don't let that stop you from doing your job and living your life. Most would probably give up or let their problems become their excuse for not doing anything. But you have not given up and do your best, which is the right thing to do.”
“And you wanna know what else Derpy?” I asked again and this time she stared at me in wonder “I think you have very pretty eyes” I smiled at her and continued to scratch her ear and rub her mane. She rubbed her eyes to take away the tears and when she looked up at me again she had a beautiful smile plastered on her face before she leaned in and layed her head against my chest and gave it a slight nuzzle.
“Thank you” was all she said before she took a deep breath and continued to lie still on my chest while I continued to scratch and rub. After a few moments she took her head off and looked at me “Thank you so much for helping me and saying all that stuff. I really needed it and truthfully I had been feeling bad for a little while but now I feel so free!” she exclaimed before she quickly lept into the air and did a back flip in the air before hovering in front of me “I gotta get going and deliver the rest of the mail. Will I see you around?” she asked.
I stood up and nodded my head “I believe so, just hopefully we won't have to crash into each other next time” I said while giving a playful chuckle to which she gave one in reply before she came in closer and nuzzled my cheek and then flew off. I watched her fly off and continued to smile before I turned around and saw Twilight standing there in awe with a few tears in her eyes which she quickly tried to get rid of the moment she saw me looking.
“Are you all right Princess?” I asked with a bit of concern but she nodded and smiled in return.
“Oh yes. I am quite alright, I just thought it was so beautiful how you handled that situation and I am really happy that you said all those thing to her and cheered her up. You are a really nice pony Adrian. Oops! I mean, human. Oh! I mean...um” she said bashfully as she tried to find a word which only made me chuckle.
“Person is the word your looking for” I said.
“Oh! I see, pursun....no that's not right.....purson.....pur....per...person......Person! Yes! I learned a new word!” she happily exclaimed and she did a small shuffle with her hoofs. “Yes, you are a nice person Adrian” she finally said as she calmed down and continued to wear that smile which made me turn red a bit.
“Well, it certainly helped that I have helped people back home who were kinda the same way after a bully or something made fun of them. But I am just glad that I was able to help her though, makes it all worth while to see someone smile like that” I said bashfully and scratched the back of my neck while I gave a sheepish smile.
This made Twilight playfully roll her eyes before she motioned for me to follow “Lets get inside and make sure the Crusaders haven't destroyed the library.....again” she groaned at that last bit before she began to walk to where I assumed they were. When I stepped in I made sure to close the doors before catching up to her, but it was not long before we made our way into the library and I once again felt my jaw drop and eyes bulge.
It was huge! It was certainly the biggest library I had ever seen! It had two floors and the walls were lined to the brim full of book cases and each one was stuffed with books of all sizes and color but what was nice though was the middle of each floor was spacious and had a couch and table to read on. But the other thing that caught my eye was on the opposite side was a set of double doors that once again had her mark plastered on the front. But before I could ask I felt my legs being assaulted by three fillies.
“What took you so long! I-We! We were starting to get bored waiting for you!” Sweetie Bell said while looking up at me with an overkill sad face and I pulled a Twilight and playfully rolled my eyes.
“We were held up when Derpy accidentally crashed into him but both of them are fine and she went merrily on her way to deliver her mail. So, what books were you girls thinking of checking out?” Twilight said and I could tell she quickly changed the subject so they would not ask. I fazed out a bit as I looked around the library while the CMC began to list off the activities they already tried to get their marks and from what I was hearing it was quite a long list.
I started to wonder a bit and tried to see how Twilight organized the books to which I found that everything was labeled in sections such as 'Education' and 'Fiction'. So I started to see if they had a fantasy section, which was funny since I myself was in the perfect setting for a fantasy book or fan fiction, but I digress.
I had always liked fantasy books and I was curious as to what sort of stories they would write and how it would compare. After a few minutes of searching I finally found the fantasy section, which was right next to the 'The Magic Of Equestria' section, wonder what was in there. But I ignored that query as I began to search for a title that caught my eye and I found one named “There And Back Again: A Gryphons Journey”. I squinted my eyes at the title and thought “This sounds almost familiar, I wonder why” I shrugged and opened it up and began reading.
---------- 30 Minutes Later ----------
I finally tore myself away from the book and stretched out my back and made a makeshift bookmark out of some paper I had in my pocket. Man, I already loved this book! I was very interesting though I would need to ask Twilight about some things in the book that I did not understand, mainly just some of words they used like when one of the villains said “We have had nothing to eat but maggoty bread for three bucking days!”. Bucking, wonder if that was a swear word here. But I stopped for another reason, one of the characters had found a magic ring and though he did not posses magic the ring allowed him to wield magic.
Which made me start to think that maybe this world had magical items as well and I could use them! That would me so epic! I could finally live out the ultimate dream of my D&D days and maybe wield a flame sword or something! Ok, ok, calm down, don't get ahead of yourself. I took a deep breath and regathered my thoughts, I decided to head back and check out the section next door, 'The Magic Of Equestria' section. So I tucked my new book into a pocket, thankfully it was a small book so it fit perfectly like the ones back home.
So I meandered over to the next section and began to look around and only then did I realize I had no idea was I was looking for. So I began to look at random book and see if one of them would be useful but for a good five to ten minutes I could not decided which one to read, such as “Star Swirls 1001 Tips”, “A Hyrda And You”, “Ancient Forest Dwellers And What Not To Do”, “The Magic Of Beauty And You”, and so on. I was about to give up when near the bottom I saw a book labeled as “Unicorn Magic 101: A Beginners Guide”, sounds reasonable and maybe I will learn a bit more as to what to look for, for future reference.
So once again while standing I opened up to the first page and began reading.
---------- 10 Minutes Later ----------
“UGH! I feel like I am reading a chemistry book” is all I said after I gave up reading for a moment and rubbed my tired eyes “Guess I should of known that magic was not as easy as I thought” I groaned. For the past ten minutes the book was telling me to know all the properties of whatever I wanted to do, like making a simple ball of fire I needed to know how much oxygen to burn and keep in contained which meant how big or small to keep it and blah blah blah. The only good thing was that it said that due to the properties of magic that once you learned how to make that fire it would be engrained into your memory and all you had to do was think of whatever fire you wanted to make and you could make it.
I went back to the index and looked to see if maybe they had a simple spell and seeing none I decided to go to lightning magic since that was one that always intrigued me and began reading again. Thankfully this time I somewhat understood the concept of making magic so I only needed to read how to produce the element, not that it was any easier. But it did seem to click a little bit since it reminded me of how I produce static when I shuffle my socked feet on carpet or how rubbing a balloon in my hair causes it to cling. So after taking a few more minutes to properly read all the way through the chapter I set the book on the ground and moved my hands so they were facing each other, like I was holding a ball.
Remembering what the book saying and how I have to feel the flow and push my mind into making the desired thing through myself and out I began to urge my whole being into producing a spark..........
….......
….......
I sighed “Nothing”. Nothing came out and I did not feel or see anything happen and I once again sighed in defeat “Well, the book did say for the magic to come out of a unicorns horn. Guess that means that in Equus that only unicorns and whatever Twilight is, an Alicorn I think she said, can produce that spark of magic. Oh well, can't say that I did not try.” I picked up the book and closed it before returning it to its proper place and began to walk back to where I think the others were. “Darn, that would have been so cool to just hold out my hand and produce a bolt, like 'Phooof'” I exclaimed and I snapped open my hands behind me as to imitate in my mind the action and result.
What I did not see though was behind me a small little arc of electricity zapping the air before dying out, unseen, unfelt and forgotten.
After winding my way back to the middle I saw a mountain of books stacked on the middle table while each of the four had a book in their hoofs and were all reading intensely and only when I was right next to Twilight did she break away and look at me “Oh! There you are! I was wondering where you went. So, what did you find?” she asked while she pleasantly smiled.
“Well, I went to the fantasy section to see how you ponies wrote books to compare with ones back on Earth. Fortunately the one I picked up was very good and was just a good and better than some back home!” I happily replied.
“That is excellent and I am very happy to see that you like to read! I love reading books! Books, books, books!” she merrily exclaimed as she clapped her front hoofs together excitedly while the three fillies groaned.
“Geez Twilight, now I understand why Rainbow Dash keeps on calling you an egghead” Scootaloo haughtily replied which got a small giggle out of the other two. This made Twilight gasp and she gave Scootaloo a stern look.
“Just because some ponies like to read ten to fifteen a books does not mean they are an 'egghead' Scootaloo” she replied while clearly annoyed which only made the three give her a deadpan look.
“Miss Twilight, it ain't normal for a pony to read ten to fifteen books, heck most ponies only read one maybe two books a week! Yer an egghead” Applebloom said.
This cause Twilight to get extremely flustered which caused her to turn to me “ADRIAN! Since you like to read, tell me! How many books do you finish within a week?!” she rapidly said with growing anticipation while eying me.
I thought about the best answer and decided to be truthful “Well, if I am not busy with work or other activities then maybe two a week, if I am lucky or one is a short book then possibly three” I replied with a shrug then I asked “Do you really read ten to fifteen books a day Princess?”
She looked shocked at my answer then she shifted her gaze down and began to fiddle with her hoofs “Well, back in Canterlot when I thought I did not need friends then yes” she said with a quiet voice and a slight blush which caused me to chuckle.
“Well it's not bad to like books but with most things in life, too much of a good thing can be bad” I declared which caused Twilight to sigh but nod in agreement.
“I suppose that is true, so what book did you end up reading?” she quizzically asked.
I retrieved the book from my pocket and held it up “ There And Back Again: A Gryphons Journey, it is quite good actually! I read it non-stop for a good thirty minutes before I stopped to stretch and wander a bit more” I said.
Twilights face lit up “Oh wow! I have not read that book in a long time, if you really like it then I can see if I can get the rest of the series for you! I believe they have another three or four books in this series before it goes into the sequel series!” she happily told me with a slight spring in her step to which I could chuckle at again.
“Well, lets get me a place to live first before I bury my nose in books eh?” I said with a smile.
“Oh yes, of course! Speaking of which, let me show you to your room! Girls, could you follow me please” she stated.
The girls all jumped off the couch and were instantly at my side and giggling “That's fine, we were getting bored of reading anyway” Scootaloo said which caused Twilights right eye to twitch for a second before she turned and lead the way to a side door.
I noticed this and looked back at the big double doors then back to Twilight “Excuse me, Princess Twilight? What is through those huge double doors back there?” I asked while pointing with my thumb behind me.
“Ah, well through there is the main throne room where me and the elements of harmony hold court, or at least we will when we figure out how to do that” she exclaimed as we turned a corner and went up a set of stairs while I continued to look around and saw that a lot of the spare rooms contained books.
“Why do you have separate rooms for books on this level?” I curiously asked.
“Ah, these books are special. These have some more deep level magic spells and other higher knowledge information that could be dangerous in the wrong hoofs so I keep them separate unless the pony who seeks the knowledge proves that they can handle the information and not use it for to harm others” she explained.
I simply nodded at her explanation while I thought “Makes sense, sometimes knowledge in the wrong hands can prove disastrous, even if the person does not know what they are reading” with my thoughts concluded I made sure to remember the way back down and not get lost, which was not too hard as we finally stopped.
“And here is where you will staying for now Adrian” Twilight explained as she pushed open the door and showed me in and I was amazed at the size and condition of the room. Like the rest of the castle, it had crystal walls but the floor was carpeted and it held a desk, most likely a closet door, another door that was open and led into a bathroom, and a huge bed! I explored the room and peaked inside the bathroom and found a nice sized sink, toilet, a cabinet, and a shower big enough for three!
I went back into the main room and I walked up to the bed and tested it with my hand and it was so soft and squishy that my hands sunk a bit into it before I pulled them out and I jumped into the center of the bed and I let out a comfortable sigh as I let my body be consumed by the softness, though to my surprise I was quickly joined by three giggling fillies as they jumped up and down like silly monkeys.
Twilight laughed at our antics before speaking up “Glad to see you like the bed, it is called a cloudbed and it is made up in Cloudsdale. What they do is they make a big cloud and they condense it into this size and using a magic frame to contain it allows one to feel the softness of a cloud without falling through it. Oh! Speaking of that, in Equus only pegasus can walk and lie on clouds naturally, unless you have a cloud walking spell cast on you! You have no idea how big and popular these became when they came out a few years ago, it was chaos for the economy when everypony threw out their old beds and most used almost every bit they had to buy one! Though I cannot complain” she added with a grin.
Hmmm, interesting. You can walk on clouds here too? Man, magic is awesome or whatever it is. An amusing thought entered my mind “Hey Princess? What room number is this room?” I asked while holding in a laugh.
Twilight looked at me before quickly checking the front and started counting before coming in “Room Number Nine, why?” she asked before I busted out laughing at the thought that I was literally laying on Cloud Nine. After spending a few more moments laughing I took a few breaths to calm down.
“S-sorry about that, it is just there is a phrase back on earth where if you are feeling extremely happy that you describe that feeling as being on cloud nine, or in this case laying on cloud nine” I explained as I continued to stifle my laughter. This earned a giggle out of her, though I could barely hear her over the sound of the fillies continuously giggling and bouncing.
“Alright girls, that is enough jumping on the bed, lets get back downstairs so you can go off and do some more crusading” she said with the thought of getting them out of here so she can ask me more questions and get me settled in.
“Awwwwww, alright I suppose” Sweetie Bell said as she went in for her last bounce but instead of bouncing up she went off a bit and landed on my chest which caused her to sheepishly grin “Oops, sorry about that. He he” she said but I laughed as I reached out and scratched her head which caused her to smile.
The other two bouncing fillies saw this and both of them 'accidentally' bounced to me. Applebloom bounced over to my other arm while Scootaloo landed short and was by my arm that was scratching Sweetie Bell and they both looked at each other and tried to muffle their laughter. “Do ya mind if we play with Adrian a bit before we leave?” Applebloom asked.
Twilight tilted her head and smiled “Weeeellllll I suppose that would alright, since I have to go and get Adrian a set of towels and other toiletries. Just don't bug him too much alright girls?” she playfully said as she turned to leave.
“We promise!” all three declared in one voice which got a laugh out of Twilight as she left. I continued to scratch Sweetie Bells head which made her yawn a bit and she decided to lie down and curl up on my chest. “Your really warm” she sleepily said with another yawn.
These three must be perfectly synched cause the other two yawned as well, I lifted my arm up and around Applebloom which cause her to curl up and soon I heard her breathing slow down and she was out. Scootaloo also curled up and tucked her head in by my arm that was scratching Sweetie Bell and soon enough she was asleep as well. I took a quick look at the three and simply smiled and thought my heart would explode at their cuteness.
“Have a good night Sweetie” I said while I rested my hand on her body and felt her body move up and down as she breathed and feeling all three sleeping soundly caused me to drift off to sleep on the comfy cloud bed and before I realized it I fell asleep as well with these three fillies.
“Alright, so I found you a couple of towels and-” Twilight had started to saw before she saw that all four of us were sound asleep and that caused her to sprout a huge smile “Awwww, that is so sweet. They must really trust and like him already. That's good, the more friends he has the better! I'll just drop these off and get dinner ready for them when they wake up” she said as she quietly put everything in the bathroom and just before she left she gently moved a pillow down and under my head before heading down with a huge grin and spring in her already bouncing step.
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He has magic... but does not know... I can't wait for the next chapter! (I can, but I do not want too...) Keep up the great work!
5174220
Thank you! Glad you liked the new chapter!
That was cute
5174463
Thank you!
Some things I noticed:
I've noticed these bolder and underlined errors several times throughout the story and I thought I could use this as an opera unity to help out. First off, let's start off with the conjugation problems. I'm assuming these are simply typos that didn't get corrected. "I'll" needs that apostrophe there to make it "I will" otherwise it just says "sick or ill."
The other thing I noticed was that when you transitioned to Derpy's line and finished her statement, you neglected your punctuation. There should be a comma there or if you want to be final about the statement you could end on a period. As I said before, "punctuation is key."
Over all I love the story dynamics and the direction you're taking. The energy of the fillies and the curiosity of Twilight. It gives a sense of whimsy and rambunctiousness.
I do have a question of an interesting nature though, do you have either a proof reader or an editor yet? Near as I can tell, you don't need an editor for spelling or grammar corrections, just someone to read through the story initially and to correct for punctuation.
If that's the case, I do recommend finding a friend here or elsewhere that can do that for you. If you don't have someone, give me a private message and I'll see if we can work something out until you can find a suitable replacement.
5175175
Ah, well thank you very much for pointing that out. I am usually pretty good at catching those but I guess I miss one or two now and then. I will go over and fix that as soon as I can (or whenever I feel like it haha)
I am happy that you like the story and the characters so far, will be sure to keep it up then!
So far, I do not have any proof readers (I have not really considered it since I am not a big writer or anything yet) or editors. What's funny though is that I have another story up that I have been doing for a while and it has not gotten any attention but the moment I started this one I have gotten a lot of faves and new watchers so I am now starting to see the need -laughs- Thank you again for the commentary and the help!
I really like the ideas you use in this chapter
I know he can´t have more than one real romance, but the cute scene with Derpy caused that i want him to be together with her.
At the moment i would like (1.Derpy, 2. Pinkie Pie, 3. well from what i saw so far i think Fluttershy.) I don´t know about Twilight, she looks more like a very good friend and a possible teacher for his possible Magic, and reading Buddy. I would like one which trust him as much as his Marefriend would do.
Well i think this story earned his favourite from me today
Somehow everything seems to be alright for me right now, three chapters are enough for me to understand how his personality have to be and i don´t mind it anymore if he is doing something that feels a bit off i think.
I would like it if you take yourr time with the story, i mean make more chapters than you maybe have planned or make room for a possible sequel. In the last time i say thing like this maybe not to rarely, but it is rare that i feel as happy as i was right now, because i got to read a chapter of a good story. I mean it earned his favourite from me today, and for the moment i think i take it into my top favourite folder
Well i have a still favourite folder (for those story´s i don´t like as much as the other ones), and i have the normal favourite folder (top favourite)
PS: For the sake of the story, he can maybe be able to learn a bit faster, maybe his ancestors were magicians. I think i forgot to say something .....
Good Job
that was good story cant wait for the other parts
5176468
Yay! Thank you again for the amazing feedback! As for the romance part, I think its going to be another few chapters before I make him realize that option since it is still technically Day One for him (I know, 4 chapters = One Day = Ugh).
I am very happy and grateful that you have a good feel for the story and have it high on the list of your favorite stories! Means I am doing something right with my writing!
As for the magic learning bit, it is going to be a little bit before he starts to develop it since right now he thinks he cannot do it but I am going to make it where something happens and he accidentally uses it to help somepony (like defending against a manticore or something, though I do not want that to be too predicable since a lot of stories usually go with that setting).
5176607
Thank you! Glad you enjoyed it, I shall begin working at once!
5176760 i don´t mind to wait for the romance part, i just want to say already which i think is good for him after i read the new chapter, i think i do it with the new one too.
Well of course for a little bit i say it to read about a new Human pairing, i mean i only found a good one about Fluttershy and i think it was Twilight, because of that both of them are more or less off the list for me.
And no problem, the story looks really good for me.
I would assume the possible resscue part could cause (psychokinesis or a magic blast for his first magic), ahh i think i let you suprise me
I don´t trust the tragedy tag yet, but maybe i try it out too, that measn i think about to read your other two storys too.
5177071
Yeah, the tragedy part will come much later in the story but I decided to put it up now so that when it comes people wont be "Why didn't you put the Tragedy tag in it?!" and what not.
I got bored and looked this up
Seriously somepony needs to do a fan art of Adrian and the CMC Napping in color, it would be SO cute!
5660544
That would be the most amazing thing ever! Not just cause it would be about them but just in general if someone did fanart of my story! It would be an honor to see such a thing!
I really hope he isn't one of those kinds that are somehow ashamed of the human race and thinks all knowledge of our nature needs to be kept hidden or is some kind of shameful confession when he finally tells.
I got it. Adrian is some sort of sick species of succubi that steals a bit of your soul every time they scratch your ears. RUN FLUTTERSHY RUN!!
Oh fuck he's one those crazy anti human, humans. So many hie stories have the human ashamed of humanity it's really annoying.
6927537
Not at all! Adrian just simply knows how humans are and he is still new to Equestria, so he just wanted to keep things rated G instead of rated R.
Adrian: I AM A SITH LORD ZAP ZAPPY ZAP
m.quickmeme.com/img/c7/c7511d555edf386f87fd25da4e2ffdcd35a892f47490fff0813dd73cd5b24996.jpg