Becoming Great and Powerful

by HitokiriDashie

And So It Begins

< Just thought I'd give you guys a note. I'm currently in my last week of class, finals week. Thus, I'll have a lot more time to write starting next week. I'm gonna try and finish this over the summer, and turn it into a legitimate thing.

Also, I'm going to be publishing mostly short chapters like this one, as it's just better for my writer's block to do so. However, I'm trying to get away from this. So, I'll be extending this chapter as my next project. I'll happily take any critique on the story. I'm still working on getting the character of Trixie down, and I'm currently trying to decide how to go with the character of Luna, as she seemed to be able to talk fairly normally in the most recent episode. >

Trixie woke up bright and early, eager to learn. "Today's the day!" she squealed as she leapt from her bed. She trotted over to her clothes rack and donned her robe and wizard hat, ready to face the day as it came. She stopped for a moment to ponder as she realized how incredibly happy this turn of events made her, even immediately after the Ponyville incident. Maybe things were going to get better for her, she thought.

She brushed the thoughts aside and happily began galloping to Canterlot Castle to meet Luna. Out of nowhere, somepony trotted in her path. A head-on collision happened as Trixie slammed into the poor mare. As they both stumbled back to their hooves, the mare looked at Trixie through her dark mane that had fallen down over her face. "I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry. I wasn't looking where I was going."

Trixie brushed herself off and affixed her hat back to her had, as it had fallen off in the collision. She steeled herself and glared back at the pony. "Damned right you weren't!" The mare shrank away from her. "Don't you know who I am? You two-bit hack! I'm Trixie! The Great and Powerful Trixie!" The mare had fallen to the ground in tears as Trixie screamed such harsh words at her. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have a meeting to attend at the castle. Good day to you." Trixie trotted toward the castle, breaking into a gallop as soon as she was out of sight.

She hung her head as she galloped and starting sobbing as she went into an abandoned alley and slumped down against the wall. "Who am I kidding? I'm not great and powerful. I'm nothing compared to my parents." she stopped crying and picked herself up, "But that's what I'm going to Luna to fix. Surely an alicorn princess can teach me enough to make them proud." She galloped out of the alley, arriving at the castle shortly thereafter.

She was met by the castle guards, who stopped her. "Halt, what is the purpose of your visit?"

"I wish to meet with Princess Luna for training, now move aside."

"Ah, she told us about you. Go on in, but mind that mouth of yours when speaking to Her Highness." They let her pass.

She trotted proudly into the castle, head held high. That didn't last long, as she skidded to a halt when she realized she had no idea where she was going. She looked up to see Luna swooping down from a balcony. "There you are!" she exclaimed with a smile on her face.

"Hello, princess." Luna hung her head. "I mean, hello Luna." She perked up again.

"Hello to you too, my pupil. Are you ready to learn some magic?"

"Of course! I came for exactly that, after all."

"Let us go to the archives. Held there are many spell scrolls that could further along your training." Luna lead Trixie down a winding spiral staircase. "What is it you wish to learn first, apprentice?"

"Something amazing. I want to be able to truly wow everypony." She drops her head, "Including my parents." She mutters under her breath.

Luna wraps a wing around her. "Little one, you should know that it isn't that easy. I can teach you what you want, but you must train. It won't happen today."

Trixie wilts. "I know, I guess I can hang in."

Comments

[NandatmosNightLurker]

I'm sorry, I just can't get over the short chapters...

But I like where this is going. It has a good storyline, from what you've described so far. Could you possibly give an explanation between Trixie and her parents? It seems a little muddy.

[HitokiriDashie]

566548

I might try to just splice together shorter chapters then. My writing process involves finishing short thoughts, and I like publishing what I have to get feedback and make sure I'm not screwing up something before I go too far with it, but I suppose if the short chapters are generally disliked I can get past that.

In regards to her parents, that's something that will be explained later in the story. I have plans for that, don't you worry

[NandatmosNightLurker]

566596

The splicing chapters together seems like a good idea. It just, one of the first things that turns me off of a story is seeing a chapter (or even worse, all of the chapters) being 1,000 words or less.

And ooh, I suppose I can wait.