• Published 17th May 2014
  • 16,016 Views, 257 Comments

Even As... - cloudedguardian



"Even as they lied to me, Even as I broke- Even as the world crumbled, Even as it died, Even then you searched for me, And tried to reach my side." Twilight Velvet is going to find her daughter. No matter what it takes.

  • ...
27
 257
 16,016

I remember

Harmony was dead to begin with.

What a marvelous way to begin a story. Solemn, quiet, simple. A resonating curse upon the land as its precious protectors turn away in disgust for the first time in over a millennia. A lovely, fun, wonderful curse.

Equestria had been so dull, all trussed up in order and perfectly planned peace. Oh yes, the land was bright, and pretty, all the little ponies running around in manufactured happiness that had been handed to them on a plate. Perhaps even saying that they had free will was a stretch, each one of them being nothing more than a pawn in a goddess’s game. Celestia had been so righteously indignant, saying that he used ponies as nothing more as toys, but really, what was the difference? Toy, pawn, worshiper, follower, friend, lover, wasn’t it all the same? The strings may be different but they are still there all the same. Celestia may have hid hers better, but that only made them harder to cut. Oh, but they could still be severed, they could still break given the strain, and when they did, they snapped so spectacularly.

Twilight walked alongside him, the two traversing peacefully along an untended path along the lake side, unbothered by the happy-go-lucky fools that were skipping obliviously towards the Royal Wedding. They only passed the occasional pair of lovebirds, other ponies who preferred to ignore the fairy-tale wedding to write one of their own making instead. Even those little lovey-dovey ponies were quickly left behind once the two turned out of the shaded forest to traverse the rough untended paths around the lake instead. Not nearly as good for sneaking kisses perhaps, but much better for dusting off some old magic.

Discord chuckled as a toad backwards hopped its way across the broken cobblestone path, watching it try to unsuccessfully get back into its pond. The little thing looked so utterly confused as every hop towards its home sent it skittering another foot away from it- Until it knocked right into Twilight’s hooves.

The purple mare paused in her walking as the creature rolled onto its feet again. Discord’s grin faded as Twilight looked up at him with a bored look of irritated indifference. She almost looked disappointed in him.

“Awww, come on Dissy, is that really the best you can do?”

The young draconequus span around to glare at Sunbeam, who was practically making a show of yawning. Moondrop was muffling laughter beneath her hooves, as a pair of large bullfrogs, so desperate to fight a moment ago, were now hopping quizzically in circles as they tried to figure out how to go forward.

“I mean, really, toads?” Sunbeam practically drawled the words out, looking over her painted hooves with a look of irritated indifference.

“Well why not?” Discord asked huffily, putting his matched hands to his just as mismatched hips as he attempted to glower back at the white furred shaman.

She, in return, shrugged. “Well I suppose if you only want to play with your little froggies that’s just fine.”

Discord raised an eyebrow as the two sisters shared a look, Moondrop having finally stifled her giggles to smirk coyly at the two of them. Sunbeam rolled her shoulders forward into a half-hearted shrug as she rose to her hooves, flicking her pink mane behind her ears with a practiced toss, and slunk delicately over to Discord, her smirk growing into something a little more daring and mischievous as she placed a hoof against his chest.

“Mm, yes... Frogs are fine and all, but can’t you do something a little... bigger?

Discord blinked, clear amusement crossing his features. He hadn’t quite expected that. If Pinkie Pie had one thing right, it was that surprises were one of the best things in the world.

The tiniest smile crossed Twilight’s face as her spell faded away and allowed the frog to bounce forward into its pond again. The look it gave her as it did so was one more dose of utter gratitude away from being total worship. Discord ran his mind along the strings of magic, and found with a hint of fascination that Twilight hadn’t cancelled out his spell, but had rather... rewired it. She had given the little wretch the guide to the new controls, so to speak. How delightfully interesting.

“Picking on frogs seems a bit petty for you.”

Discord drew his gaze away from the far too content and lazy driftings of the pond to raise an eyebrow at the unicorn mare behind him instead.

“Oh?”

Twilight rolled her eyes at him as he flicked her side with his tail, continuing their walk forward as she rolled her shoulders into a half-hearted shrug.

“I suppose I expected you to be celebrating your release with something... Bigger, I guess.”

“Something bigger, is it? Oh well now that can be arranged!” he laughed, sweeping an arm out to the area around them, “I could turn the whole forest into forsicles! Make the bugs ten times their size! Make the cobblestones into a chessboard perhaps, or set the skies clicking into a clock!”

The mares just rolled their eyes and walked away.

“Or perhaps I should make it rain chocolate milk from cotton candied clouds,” he mused, and was rewarded with Sunbeam pausing to look over her shoulder at him with interest.

“Or perhaps make the hills bloom in icing sugar flowers, let the bees get drunk on bourbon nectar.”

Twilight stopped and looked at him with a hint of curiosity, and his grin didn’t quite fit the mask he’d chosen as the air snapped. The rolling green hills suddenly burst into checkerboard blue and orange, the sickly sweet scent of sugar and alcohol filling the air. Magenta magic reached out, and Discord chuckled as Twilight pulled a sapphire blue blossom to her nose, before biting it cleanly in half. It was all he could do not to burst out laughing as she wrinkled her muzzle at the strong taste. Then, she laughed, something he joined joyfully in on, even if hers was something a little bitterer, a little darker, than how it felt it should be, but it wasn’t as if it mattered.

“Impressive,” Deadpan or not, there was genuine admiration hidden underneath it, even if it was a bit reluctant.

That’s more like it,” Sunbeam could barely contain the delight in her voice even with that perfected deadpan of hers, but Moondrop wasn’t even bothering, and had already managed to pounce one of the smaller clouds, and had buried her muzzle in it.

“Of course! I am the Spirit of Chaos, after all. I can do this and much more! Including making more after your sister eats them all on you...”

Sunbeam’s head whipped around with such speed that it sent all her jewelry clinking, and Discord was treated to the most undignified squawk to ever come out of her mouth.

Moony!Don’t eat it all- Leave some for me you twerp!”

Discord burst out laughing as Sunbeam’s attempts to push the other earth pony off the cloud not only utterly failed, but got her soaked as Moondrop jumped off the cloud and bucked it, showering her elder sister in a wave of chocolate milk. The two stared off for a moment, the pale violet mare prancing proudly, blue mane flouncing around silver bands and jeweled chains, looking quite the contrasting picture as she stuck her tongue out in perfect childish glee at her now brown-furred sibling. Then dust flew and Discord laughed louder as Sunbeam tackled her, gold and silver jewellery ringing like the start of a tournament bell as it devolved into a full out fight. It was a truly ridiculous sight. Two proud, high and mighty shamans, just out of their apprenticeship, rolling around in a squabbling wrestling match in the summer grass like a pair of colts.

He was broke quite suddenly out of his laughter by a large dirt clod hitting him in the back of the head, and he span around, teeth playfully bared at the two panting mares, each with a mischievous grin on their face and leaves in their hair, one of whom had just nailed him one. The draconequus gave out a loud, rolling growl, creeping along the ground towards them like a lion, before lunging forward at Moondrop, who ran off in shrieking laughter, her bracelets the only ones caked in mud as her sister laughed at her for getting caught red-handed. Then Moondrop was laughing back that that phrase didn’t make any sense as Sunbeam ran shrieking off, the high-pitched giggles escaping past pants of breath as Discord wheeled on the elder mare instead, knowing full well that she had been about to soak the both of them with a water bubble.

Discord blinked, staggering back as he shook his wet mane out of his eyes. Twilight’s shoulders were shaking slightly as she stood stock still, water dripping off her now soaked bangs to run down her cheeks, and leaving him to be the one to glare up at the pegasus who had just unceremoniously doused them.

“May I ask what that was about?” He growled, trying to keep his voice to the pitch and tone of the noble-pony form he had taken.

“Oh, sorry, I didn’t see you two there. I’m clearing clouds for the wedding, you know, I guess that one had a little more rain water in it than I thought.”

“No, you think?” Twilight hissed, her voice cracking slightly as she lifted a hoof to wipe the water out of her eyes.

The pegasus either didn’t catch it, or didn’t care, because he shrugged with barely the slightest hint of apology before turning to fly off to the next cloud.

“Shall I turn his wings around backwards?” Discord asked lazily, a snap of magic drying them both off in a blink.

Twilight’s look of surprise at the assistance disappeared under a glower a second later. “You know what, yes. Go ahead. Please do.”

He smiled, a sadistic smirk that split across his face as the air vibrated with a loud, second snap. The moment of silence that followed was like the anticipation of a faulty firework’s bloom. Then the very quiet, very satisfying, and very familiar noise of a pegasus’s crash landing rang out. Discord’s grin only grew at the brief, darkly gleeful smile that flickered across Twilight’s face.

“I enjoyed that way too much...” She chuckled slightly, a laugh that almost sounded forced as she walked forward again. There was an odd look of pain, or perhaps guilt in her eyes as she turned away.

“Oh, I don’t know about that. What’s wrong with a little chaos?” He asked lightly, and was pleasantly surprised to see her eyes spark with curiosity at his words. Just for a second, it wasn’t just the hollowed mare there, but it wasn’t just the perfectly prepared and sculpted pawn of Celestia’s either. It was something between- Something greater. And something he very much wanted to see more of.

“What do you mean?” She asked, turning to look at him, even now the attentive student.

He would have to be a fool to let such a perfect opportunity go to waste, now wouldn’t he?

“I mean that the world needs a little chaos, don’t you think? Where’s the joy in never stepping outside of order? Everypony never looks past what they have right in front of their noses. It all just falls to rhythm and habit in the name of perfect harmony without anyone looking outside the box at the possibilities!”

What possibilities?” Her tone implied it was more of a sarcastic statement, but Discord caught the flicker of hope in her eyes in the moment before she turned away. That silenced voice betrayed it for what it was, an honest question wanting to look past what she knew. Wanting to look past what was just "possible."

A millennia back, two earth pony shamans stood together with a spirit of chaos underneath an eclipse. The three stood quietly in a darkness that everyone else feared, and whispered blasphemous things. They spoke of the forgotten spirits of the world, of the gentle fire of the sun, and the lonely songs of the moon.

The youngest would close her eyes and speak about how the stars above could be just so much more than lost little lights towed across the sky by uncaring magical fools who could see nothing of the possibilities that was so plainly there above them. About how the black canopy above the was simply waiting for a masterpiece to be created, to be forged into beauty with a caring hoof.

The elder would grin wildly and laugh, daring the world to defy what it thought was possible, to not just stand there happy in peace and quiet, but to craft their new land into something greater than the three kingdoms of old. She spoke of ancient magic locked away, of immortality and dreams. She would spread her arms to the sky and sing of such forbidden things as rebellion and power, order and chaos, gods and mortals... And when the eldest of the three wrapped his lions paw around her shoulders, and asked what possibilities it was that she seen so far off on the dawn's horizon, she'd turn to him, fire in her eyes and a manic grin upon her face and hiss;

All of the possibilities.”

Twilight’s gaze snapped back to him at his words, and he smiled. The realm of possibility meant nothing to him anymore, for he had long ago become the Master of The Impossible. And perhaps, he thought as he wrapped an arm around Twilight’s shoulders, he had a new apprentice.

“Just think about it. When you throw away order, what’s left to chain you down? You can do whatever you want, whenever you want. The figures in the olden tales never let little things such as laws, or limits, slow them down, and they reached heights nopony else could. The greatest goods, the most extreme evils, they wrote themselves immortal in a way that even the alicorns cannot match, by making sure they would be remembered for eternity. Even after the Sun burns out or Love finally dies, people will still whisper of the stories of Starswirl the Bearded and Sombra the Great, because they are stories that push the limits of what equine kind knows. It reminds all of you of what is past order and harmony, past the fake smiles and polite lies. The things of my age that you have forgotten.

“I have seen things you could never imagine. I have watched as ponies have dared to bend the laws of magic and pull them into shapes that everyone else feared to even dream about. I have seen civilizations fall through stagnant perfection, and others rise through rebellion and war. It is everything your perfect picture of Harmony isn’t. There is no success without failure, no progress without defiance... And it all starts with a little chaos.

Twilight was staring at him with nothing short of amazement. There was light in her eyes again, he could feel her mind churning, pushing away the fog to think over what he was saying. With her brow furrowed, mane ruffled and fur matted, her gaze glued to the ground without seeing a single stone that passed beneath them, Twilight looked like the typical academy student pondering carefully over the newest professor’s great speech. Discord couldn’t help but chuckle at the sight.

“I’m... Surprised.”

Discord looked over to Twilight with no small amount of curiosity. They’d been silent for over five minutes now, and he was quite looking forward to hearing what the pony who had been so groomed to be the epitome of Harmony would say.

“I honestly never would have thought of any of that. It’s such a foreign idea... It’s like, throwing away the concept of sense and logic itself in the name of discovery. It’s everything I’ve loved about science while completely ignoring every method I’ve had drilled into my head for the past... I don’t-know-how-long. It’s ridiculous, and yet...”

“It’s fascinating, isn’t it?” Discord hissed sweetly, and Twilight’s look of deep thought slipped for a moment to the most delightfully devilish smirk.

“It really is... Except-” And the smirk was gone, the darkness was back, and Twilight shrugged out from under his arm as she sped up to walk ahead. “Except it goes against everything Celestia taught me about magic.”

Discord scoffed so loud that he was sure he’d been heard across the street, and going by the glare he was getting from Twilight, she though so too.

“Celestia, bah. Are you really still so stuck on everything that self-righteous Princess spouts?”

A mixture of emotions flickered across Twilight’s face, and it wasn’t long before she broke his gaze and looked away. “I... I don’t know any more. I’ve always trusted her-“

“Oh, yes, trust- like that’s never screwed anypony over.” Discord snarked, rolling his eyes in exasperation. Perhaps he’d been a bit... Impatient thinking she’d be able to see the light so soon.

“What do you mean?”

He nearly did another double-take at the honest curiosity in her voice. Amusement quickly replied his surprise however. How long had it been since someone could so easily keep him on his toes like this?

“I mean that blind trust is a fool’s folly. If you’re going to trust your back to someone, then they better have earned that place, don’t you think? You really have to stand back and say, “What have they done for me lately?” You better have a good answer for that too, otherwise the next thing they might just do for you is stab you in the dark.”

That delightfully devilish grin was back. “The latest thing you’ve done for me lately is try and turn my hometown into your Capital of Chaos after trying to drive me to despair. According to that, I shouldn’t trust you one whit!”

“Exactly!"

Now it was Twilight’s turn to double-take, and she stared at him slack jawed as he beamed. There was hope for this mare yet.

“Of course you shouldn’t trust me, if I had Elements, Betrayal and Dishonesty would definitely be among them. But. You know I’m not lying right now. Why, you’re even clever enough to know why.”

She stared at him, stock still. There was a moment of perfect quiet, him grinning wildly while she slowly frowned, her mind refusing to ignore the riddle she’d just been presented.

“...You don’t have any reason to lie to me,” Twilight said slowly, realization dawning proudly in her voice. “You don’t have any reason to hide your intentions at all. You never have. The only thing you intend to do is... Do. No great plan, No vast scheme- Just... One. Big. Game.

“Correct, Twilight Sparkle. That’s quite correct indeed. My plans tend to extend no farther than lunch, really. Maybe an occasional plotted game or riddle... But the only one I really feel the need to try and out-scheme is Celestia. But that’s mostly because I hate people being better than me at something,” He chuckled, “that, and she truly is a fascinating opponent.”

“You make Celestia sound like she’s some grand chess-master,” Twilight protested, “Sitting back on her throne and barking out orders to move the board into position.”

“Oh no, Celestia doesn’t bark out orders, she whispers them,” Discord replied simply, enjoying the look of shock on Twilight’s face as realization once again began to dawn. “Sweetly. Gently. Like a mother teaching their foal that the stove is hot, or that the lake is deep. She doesn’t take her pieces as needed, she grooms them decades ahead of time. Perfectly loyal little knights and bishops, all lined up, stars in their eyes as they look up at their beloved Princess Celestia. You even know this yourself. You’ve never feared or doubted anything Celestia’s done, have you? You’ve always known it’s all just part of the plan while ignoring the fact that it means that you’re nothing but part of her plan too.”

He could tell he’d hit something there, he could see the recognition shoot across her face, and it was all he could do not to stop there and ask her what devilish little thing Celly had come up with that she was only now starting to recognize.

“I wonder...”

So he took a guess.

“How long has she been so carefully shaping you for her oh so great plans? Twilight Sparkle, the Princess’s personal protégé. Her perfect, precious student. Her little Queen. Her Element of Magic. She needed new bearers to free Luna, and she’d need perfect ones to face me. You did the job marvelously too, I might add, to be honest I‘d underestimated her. I didn’t think she’s do such a good job...” he chuckled slightly, scratching his chin, “I wonder how much of your life she’s planned out... Your friends, your home, perhaps even your future husband?”

A blast of magic zipped past his head. It was quite the wide miss for her, and he stifled his chuckles to read her face. Anger was there, oh yes, bright and blazing, but doubt was burning there even stronger. So he smiled, sweetly, apologetically, and the anger on her face slipped away a little. Oh, Twilight... Still so tired, still so scared... Still so very lonely.

“Oh come now, Miss Sparkle, I‘m not your enemy. Don’t take an old coot’s ramblings to heart, I don’t mean any harm. I have nothing but sympathy for you, all tangled up in her webs and only now just breaking free. We’ve both said it, you have no reason to trust me, but you know I have no reason to try and deceive you either. I don’t hide what I want behind honeyed lies; why I’m sure you already know what it is I want. I imagine it’s really quite obvious.”

“...Me,” She said quietly, and he nodded gently as she spoke, “You want me. I don’t know why but-“

“Because every King needs a Queen of course! Not another piece on a chessboard, oh no, but an equal. Another factor in the equation, a yang to my yin, someone to keep things interesting! I’m no Princess, with their punctual plans for perfectly poised pawns, prompting and positioning so everything all falls into pretty petty pathetic lines. That’s all just so boring. There’s no freedom in it! What is life but a game, and what is a game with no choices?”

“I could choose to blow your head off right now,” Twilight snapped, but her voice was trembling, and he could practically see the exhaustion winning out, the desire to fight fading to nothing but a big show.

“Oh I don’t doubt that one bit,” He said sweetly, still smiling as calmly as could be, “That lovely dark magic you’ve got going there says volumes- But I don’t believe you will. Oh you can, of course, I won’t even stop you. It is after all your choice, and I won’t make any moves against it... Heh, I’m sure it would hurt like the dickens...But it wouldn’t actually injure me. So go ahead, blow my head off if you so desire! Why, I take myself apart all the time! Makes cleaning out the cobwebs a lot easier, you see.”

They stood off like that, for a while, her glaring at him, horn crackling, and him just smiling back. Then, as suddenly as a magic tank finally sputtering out at empty, she closed her eyes and straightened up, the magic and anger disappearing in barely a blink.

“...There’s no point. I’ve already lost my friends, I’ve already drove away my brother, I don’t want to make an enemy out of you as well.”

Discord nodded and smiled, and walked forward to rejoin her at her side as if nothing had happened at all.

“Quite the wise choice, Miss Sparkle. I don’t think Celestia gives you nearly enough credit-”

“-But if you think I’m going to agree to be your Queen of Chaos, you’re a fool. I have no intention of choosing any path so utterly against what I stand for. In fact, if you try the tricks you tried on me and the other Bearers on anypony else, I promise I will make you regret it.”

Her exhaustion was clear, but he refused to underestimate her again, so when she said those words, so perfectly calm, her eyes dark, sharp, and promising pain if defied, he listened with every note of solemn respect he had in him.

“Why, of course, Twilight. I wouldn’t expect anything less.”