Chapter 2: The Living Nightmare of Big Macintosh
It turned out Mac had gotten himself into a never ending nightmare. For the next few days posters were all over Ponyville advertising the auction, and soon every single mare in town was doing extra work to save up as many bits as they could for the event. The whole town seemed to pick up the mentality of ‘Work till you can’t work no more, then get back to work’. When Mac made his trips into the town to drop off apples for Applejack, mares would stare at him more, giggling to themselves, whispering to one another.
If the mares were not bad enough, the single stallions in town also got into a work mentality, or at least a workout one. Unlike Mac, they were excited for this opportunity, and also, unlike Mac, who needed to be forced to sign up, they all came to the town hall to register themselves. Some of them even came to Big Mac to allow them to work on the farm for no charge, each wanting to try to look as good as him. Mac, who was not one to turn down free labor, excepted them, but soon regretted his decision.
Most them were not used to waking up before the sun, some were not even used to waking up till the double digits. By the end of the first day, most of them were limping back home content with doing their own workouts instead of helping Mac. The only ones who stayed past a week were Soarin, Thunderlane, Braeburn, and Spike. Even the little dragon had entered the auction hoping to impress Rarity. Out of all of them, only Braeburn remained seeing that he was used to farm work while all the others swore never to work with the cousins again.
While the two farm ponies worked together, all Braeburn seemed to be able to talk about was the auction. He would go on for what seemed like hours to Mac, talking about how he wanted a cute filly to be the one to win him. He would start to go through a list of fillies he liked and tried to figure out how much he would go for. Mac, on the other hoof, just wanted to get his chores done and to get this horrible event over with. All he wanted from this auction was a sane mare who understood that he didn’t want to be part of this.
But is there a mare like that? Mac thought every night before he went to bed. As much as he did hate this little event, he did have a bit of excitement in him wondering which mare would bid on him and win. Doubt Cheerilee would bid on me, Mac thought, a chill running up and down his spine as he thought about that love poison incident. They had stayed on relatively good terms since then, but it was still a bit awkward to be around one another, especially when the Cutie Mark Crusaders were around. His mind started to go through a list of mares that he wouldn't mind bidding on him. Well there is that Octavia filly, but Ah think Applejack told me about her not being into stallions. Most of Applejacks friends seem nice enough, most of them mighty cute as well.
At that, Mac’s mind started to make a list of Applejack’s friends, trying to figure out which one he would like to have bid on him. There’s Miss Fluttershy, she’s might quiet just like maself. Heard she can talk to animals, that would be mighty helpful around the farm. Mac thought about the possibility of dating Fluttershy. As much as he thought he has a connection with the animals on the farm she would probably have greater insight than him. Doubt it would work though. With the two of us being so quiet we wouldn't even start a conversation of sorts. Heck, Ah doubt that little filly is even going to place a bid. After scratching Fluttershy off the list, Mac began to think of the next.
There that white filly, Miss Rarity Ah believe; she’s a pretty one that’s fer sure. She was the Element of Generosity, a positive if there was any; she might come off as a vain pony, but she wouldn't hesitate to help others. Mac had to admit, out of all his sister’s friends Rarity was by far the prettiest. What could you expect from a mare that seemed to live in the spa? Mac cringed at that. Miss Rarity likes the finer things in life; and Ah’m a farmer who works all day in the dirt and sweating. Doubt she would trade her spa days for apple bucking. Once again, another mare was scratched off Mac’s list. Besides, Rarity would probably bid on a sports star of some kind, he did remember Soarin and Thunderlane trying to help out in the fields.
Twilight Sparkle? Mac had never heard a bad thing about her, though he could remember a certain situation involving a doll. Mac looked over at his night stand where Smarty Pants was still sitting there. Mac had been wanting to give it back, but it was embarrassing to admit that he held on to the doll. She’s far smarter than anypony Ah’ve met, and she has a very kind heart. Always wanting to help anypony that needs it. She’s not bad lookin at all. Mac looked up at the ceiling trying to think of some bad qualities of Twilight. Well she is a bit of a perfectionisht, not somethin that works well with animals and plantin seeds. Then as sweet as she is, that pony can have some major meltdowns, and she’s a princess and Ah’m a farmer. There has to be a rule about dating commoners. Mac thought, scratching another mare off his list of mares he would like to have bid on him.
Then there was only one friend that Mac hadn’t thought about yet, the one that was his sister’s closest friend and a Wonderbolt in the making, Rainbow Dash. Mac thought about her for a few moments. In many ways she was the opposite of him, She’s brash, arrogant, stubborn, a show off, and a free loader at times. Mac couldn't even keep count of how many times Dash had come over for dinner; either because Granny had made one of her apple dumpling surprises, or because he had finished another barrel of cider. To give her credit though, she is the Element of Loyalty, and that means somethin. No matter what them lot get into, she sticks by her friends till the very end. Also she’s an athlete and that shows, might not be a pretty as Rarity but definitely not a bad lookin mare. Heck she is more of my type then-
Mac blushed at this thought and shook his head violently.
What are ya thinkin? Those are yer sister’s best friends! There are so many bad outcomes to come from that Mac. Just hope it’s another mare, no matter how cute they are. Mac gave a nod of this as he closed his eyes. Though his mind kept thinking about his sister’s friends in questionable situations.
--
“Mac yer looking terrible this mornin,” was the first thing Mac heard his cousin say, as he walked down the steps on the dreaded day.
“Thanks cuz,” Mac grumbled as he sat down at the table to have a cup of coffee. It was still early, being around four in the morning as he still had work to be done with Braeburn. The only other pony up that morning was Granny who was sipping on her tea and reading the day’s paper.
“Well ya better look like that stud we know by tonight,” Braeburn laughed putting down his empty mug of coffee. “Them mares will be expectin that big strong work pony they all been savin them bits on,”
“Ah’m not the only work pony there,” Mac said as he took his coffee black.
“But yer the most attractive one by far,” Granny added, making Mac laugh softly while Braeburn placed his hoof over his chest and looked at Granny as if she had just told him she had ran over his puppy.
“Now, Granny, that hurts, ya know Ah’m the most eligible bachelor back in Appaloosa,” He said, puffing out his chest showing the sheriff star that was there. “Not to mention sheriff and owner of the most successful apple farm in the whole west,” he said with a noticeable amount of pride in his accomplishments.
“And from what I hear, yer also sleeping around a lot. Don’t need a pitchfork weddin now, ” Granny said calmly, still sipping her tea while Braeburn’s face went pale. Mac just kept laughing to himself as he finished up his own mug of coffee and started to make his way outside.
“Ho-how did ya…” Braeburn’s face was so confused and pale, that Mac was afraid that his cousin was going to fall over from a heart attack if he didn’t get him out of the kitchen in time.
“Come on now, we need to get them chores done if yer wantin to impress any mares tonight,” Mac laughed, opening the door wide to let the cool morning air in. Without looking back, he went to get his morning chores done so he could have breakfast. If Braeburn was going to move from his spot in the kitchen anytime soon was another story.
The morning chores were easy to do between himself and Braeburn. If it wasn’t for the fact that Braeburn could never stayed quiet for longer than two minutes, he wouldn't mind having him around more often. With the current reason why he was in town, it made everything just more annoying to the red stallion. As they pulled the equipment of the morning’s work back to the farm, Braeburn started to talk about the auction.
“Ya know Mac, I’ve been thinkin,” he started, looking up towards the sky as he walked.
“A dangerous pastime for ya,” Mac replied, already knowing where this conversation was headed, and didn’t want any part of it.
“Funny,” Braeburn growled. Leave it to the pony that never talked to come up with quick little quips to stop most conversations. “But I’ve been thinkin more about what mare Ah hope is to bid on me, and Ah think of gotten it narrowed down, but there is a small problem,” Braeburn said, eyeing his cousin to see his reaction.
“They’re not stallions?”
“Ah shut it you goat lover!” Braeburn snapped, as Mac just chuckled to himself calmly as they reached the barn. “The problem is, all of em are Applejack’s friends.” Mac tried to give any reaction to this, seeing that the previous night he had been thinking about his sister’s friends as well. Try as he may, family could always pick up small details such an awkward step or a slight shudder. “Ah take it ya been thinkin the same thing. Well seein that yer the one livin here just tell me which one to not work my charm on so they might bid on yer sorry hide,”
Mac didn’t answer, his mind had now began to repeat his arguments from last night. He didn’t want any of Applejack’s friends to bid on him; they were her friends! The amount of problems that could cause was unfathomable. He didn’t want to be the stupid reason that tore their friendship apart. Braeburn just kept eyeing Mac, thinking that he was trying to hide the fact he had a secret crush, while in actuality Mac was trying to save the Elements of Harmony.
“Eeyup, Applejack sure has a lot of pretty friends,” he laughed, stealing his cousins catchphrase just to make him a bit more riled up. “Ma first choice has to be that pretty little filly Miss Fluttershy. Them eyes can just make a stallion’s heart stop faster than a herd of charging buffalo!” Braeburn looked over towards Mac for a reaction, but the stallion’s face had gone back to stoic. “She’s a bit quiet like yerself, but Ah’m sure it just takes the right stallion to make her start talkin.”
“Yer goin to help her find that stallion? Maybe find one fer yerself,”
“Ah’m startin to think ya want to get me mad so Ah’d buck ya in the side, makin you unable to attend the auction,”
“You keep doin all this thinkin, yer goin to strain yerself,” Mac was having fun at this cousin’s expense. Braeburn looked as though he was ready to buck Mac so hard that the red stallion might be unable to apple buck for the new few seasons, but the western stallion just took a deep breath in.
“Then Ah started to think about her other friend, the pink one. She seems as crazy as they come, but Ah like maself a bit of crazy in a mare. Makes everyday an adventure!” Braeburn laughed, looking at Mac for a reaction. He really wanted to see if Mac had a crush on any of his sister’s friends; he could use that against him for years to come. Mac just kept chewing on the piece of what in his mouth giving his cousin a blank look.
“She’s our cousin,” Mac deadpan at this moving into the barn while Braeburn stood at the door wide eyed.
“She’s our what?”
“Cousin, apparently the Pies and the Apples were related down the line and makes her about our third cousin Ah believe. Still legal here in Equestria, but Ah don’t think it would be somethin any of our family would think too highly of,” Mac said with a shrug, pushing the equipment into the corner of the barn. Braeburn just gave out a sigh as he scratched his chin.
“Well, that’s disappointin, but Ah guess it narrows it down to two ponies then don’t it?” Braeburn suggested, taking the bags of seed he was carrying and setting them down in the opposite corner of Mac. “This last one though, might be a bit of a long shot for a simple farmer, but maybe ma title of sheriff and my sense of danger will make her think twice before judgin me,” Braeburn rubbed his sheriff badge as he did this and stuck his chest out a bit more to show it off more.
Mac just kept putting seed away, not paying much attention to his cousin. He could already guess what pony he was thinking of, and though he had no more of a shot than Mac did; they were both just simple farm ponies and not Wonderbolts. Turning back to his cousin Mac could see that he was expecting more of a reaction.
“Any guesses on who this mare might be?” he asked, eyeing his cousin for any reaction.
“Nope.”
“Come on, entertain the idea.”
“Nope”
Braeburn gave a loud grunt at his cousin’s non-playful matter. Being the cousin of a stallion who would only speak maybe five full sentences a day could be frustrating at times. Then the fact that he had gotten in some comebacks today that he was not prepared for made him even more frustrating.
“So Ah’d take it you know the mare Ah’m talkin ‘bout?” Braeburn asked, giving up on any attempts of getting even with his cousin.
“Eeyup”
“Think Ah got a chance?”
“Nope”
Braeburn glared at Mac for a few minutes, trying to figure out the stallion in front of him. Finally he gave up on trying to figure anything about which mare Mac wanted to have bid on him and followed him back to the farm house.
“Yer a terrible cousin ya know?”
“Eeyup”
--
The entire town looked like it was closed for a holiday or a festival of some kind. There were closed signs in almost every window, saying that they were at the auction and would not return till the following day. Everypony was gathering in the park, where a large stage had been built. To Mac, the stage looked as though it was supposed to be used in a musical or a performance of some kind. It was much larger than any auction stage he had ever seen, being draped with velvet curtains, made out of oak, and seemed to be big enough to hold at least twenty full grown stallions on it.
Mac had to enter the park from the rear, where all the other stallion that were being auctioned off were supposed to enter. With his ears laying flat on his head, he entered the park with Braeburn by his side, who was smiling wide with a noticeable skip in his step, both wearing saddle bags filled with the items they were required to bring.
The back entrance led to a changing room that was behind the stage, which Mac had not seen before. There were a few mirrors scattered around for the stallion to check themselves, chairs to rest, and drinking fountains as well. What really surprised mac was how the stallions were acting. It what it must be like backstage a beauty pageant or a fashion show. Stallions were checking themselves out in the mirror, making sure that their manes were well kept and looked strong or handsome.
Others were gathering in small groups, talking amongst themselves. They were making estimates on how much they would go for, what mares would bid on them, and what mare they hoped picked them. Mac tried to get through the crowd without being noticed, this whole thing was so outlandish for him and truly it was making him uncomfortable. Before he could even move five steps into the room somepony was shouting to him.
“And there he is! Big Mac! That stallion is going to beat any of our prices by at least a few hundred!” It was Soarin, he had been standing in a group with what seemed to be other Wonderbolts. Mac could only recognize two others out of the group as Thunderlane and the muscular pony Buff Bicep. All of the other stallions turned to look at Big Mac, whose ears were still folded against his head and had sweat starting to roll down his face.
“I don’t see what is so special about him,” a pony in the back said, his voice was just dripping with arrogance. “It’s not like he is royalty or anything. In fact, he is just a common dirty Earth Pony,” Mac heard Braeburn give out a growl as the pony started to laugh. Mac looked around and finally spotted a pony in the far back, he had on a white tuxedo with a red rose in it, a white coat, blond mane that looked like it was done by a professional, and bright blue eyes. Now Mac didn’t judge a book by it’s cover, he wanted to get to know a pony before making any decision about them. However, something about this stallion just rubbed him wrong, and if he ever saw him on the farm he would not hesitate to buck him off the property as fast as possible.
“Now don’t be throwing a hissy fit Blueblood. Just because there is another stallion prettier than you doesn’t mean you have to throw a tantrum,” Mac looked around to see another pony coming up from behind Blueblood. He was a well-built earth pony dressed in the armor of the Royal Guard, the armor itself so polished that Mac had to squint away as he approached, the sheathed saber at his side clinking with every step.
“Wha...” Blueblood sputtered before scowling at the soldier. “How dare you, you... you servant! I am a member of the Royal Family—”
“Not by blood,” the guard said with a grin.
Blueblood’s brow creased so hard Mac thought his eyes would pop out of his head. “I will have your rank for that insult!”
The guard seemed unimpressed. “You don’t write my evals, you don’t raise the sun, and you ain’t my momma. Buck off, pretty boy.” Mac did his best to suppress a chuckle as Blueblood’s face turned a choice shade of pink.
As the prince stormed off, the guard turned back to Mac. “Heh, that right there is why I ain’t an officer. Never did get the whole ‘politics’ thing.” He held out a hoof to Mac. “Name’s Tweak, Staff Sergeant, Equestrian Royal Guard.”
“Macintosh Apple,” Mac said, bumping the proffered hoof. How many ponies know of this auction? he thought to himself as he looked down at Tweak. Mac was still a few inches taller than this pony, but Mac had to admit he was a intimidating looking pony. Looking at the others, they all also seemed to register this fact as well.
“Pardon me for askin, but what brought you down to this shindig?” Mac asked, unsure if he should even ask a pony this. Tweak, however, just laughed as he pointed his hoof at another stallion.
“Well, Command heard about this here auction”—he gestured to the crowd of stallions—”and thought it’d be a bit of good PR to have a few Guards come down and participate. Also Prince Armor called in an old favor and got me on the detail.”
“Shining Armor? He asked you here? Why?”
“You see that colt right there?” Mac followed his gaze towards a orange Pegasus who was chatting with Spike. “That there is Corporal Flash Sentry, a young up-and-coming hot shot. Got a good head on his shoulders, but apparently Shining’s little sister has a crush on him and he might have a crush on her as well. While I have no objections to two ponies finding love, Shining just wants to make sure he understands that if he screws up he will have every Royal Guard on him in an instant,” Tweak laughed at this while a few of the stallions around Mac paled a bit, especially Soarin. Mac on the other hoof, gave a nod of approvement. As an older brother, he understood the need to protect his little sister.
“Now if you gents will excuse me, I think I need to give him a little bit of a scare. I was his drill sergeant back at basic. I want to see his reaction when he see’s me…” Tweak trailed off as he started to sneak up behind Flash Sentry. Mac and the other kept quiet wondering what the drill sergeant was going to do, half excited, half scared for the pony.
Across the room, the orange pegasus—apparently Flash Sentry—was chatting quietly with another stallion. His back to Tweak, he never saw the earth pony as he crept up behind him, grinning like a shark, until he was right behind him. Tweak took a deep breath and bellowed, “Corporal Sentry! Post!”
The young pegasus flinched and spun to face the voice. The instant he saw the predatory grin on Tweak’s face, terrified recognition filled his eyes and he locked all four legs with a clang of his armor, his neck going ramrod straight. “Drill Sergeant, yes, Drill Sergeant!”
Tweak scowled at him. “Corporal, are you a mare?” When Flash didn’t offer a response, Tweak leaped towards him, bringing them nose to nose. “What, you as deaf as you are ugly?! Are you a female?!”
“Drill Sergeant, no, Drill Sergeant!”
“Then stop making me a Luna-damned sandwich! I know I’m sexy enough for ten, but I’m just one stallion, so just one Drill Sergeant!”
“D-Drill Sergeant, yes!”
“At the end, genius!”
Flash cowered under the assault. “Yes, Drill Sergeant!”
Tweak frowned again. “Look at you,” he growled, circling around the shaking Flash like a wolf, “all gussied up, lookin’ all pretty. I bet you think yer a real mare-killer, eh?” He ended back in front of Flash, once more breathing down his face. “That why you’re here, Corporal? To score some candy vag?!”
To his credit, Flash winced at the crude term. “No, Drill Sergeant!” he said emphatically.
The entire time Tweak chewed out Flash Sentry, not a single stallion made a noise, each afraid that they would have the former Drill Sergeant’s wrath thrown upon them next. That was until there was a burst of laughter coming from the opposite side of the group. All eyes turned to a dark blue Earth Pony with a red and black mane, what was laughing so hard tears were rolling down his eyes.
“H-he said can-candy...Pfft! Bwhahahahaha!” the blue pony almost fell over in laughter at this. Each stallion looked at one another, unsure who this new pony was, for he didn’t seem to be from Ponyville, but Mac knew who the pony was at once and a fire seemed to build up in his chest as he remembered the stallion. Shock n’ Awe. The stallion that had tried to date his sister.
Now as Applejack’s older brother, he felt like he had to inspect stallions before they could date his sister. Call him old fashioned, over protective, and sometimes a jerk of a brother, but it was his duty to make sure that only the best stallions got to date his sister.
And after his conversation, there was no way on this green earth that Shock n’ Awe was one of them. Before he could go over to the stallion in question Tweak beat him to the punch, storming across the room to the still laughing stallion. “Do you mind, sunshine? I’m trying to talk to this fine young soldier here.”
Shock let out a sharp breath. “Talk? Seems to me you’re more trying to scare the crap out of him with the whole ‘Rah-Rah’ Guard shtick. Ya know, that gets kinda old after a while, gramps.”
“G... Gramps?!” Tweak took a deep breath, but Shock continued.
“Dude, I was in the Guard. Special Forces, ya dig? The yelling don’t work on me.”
Tweak blinked at him several times, then scowled. “Ooooh, I see. Yer one of them prima donna SF types. Need an entire airship just to carry yer ego to a drop zone. Well, lemme tell ya, sweetness, that don’t impress me none!” He stepped back so he could address both the unimpressed Shock ‘n Awe and the still-shaking Flash Sentry. “Now you both listen here! All three of us are representing the Equestrian Royal Guard at this little get-a-long.”
“Dude,” Shock said with a sigh, “I told you, I got out.”
“Once a Guard, always a Guard!” Flash cried.
“Damn right!” Tweak said, his face briefly twisted into something that, if viewed with a microscope and a scholar’s patience, could have been a prideful grin as he eyed the young Corporal. “Now, that being the case, both you little knuckleheads better be on your best behavior, or I swear to Sweet Filly Luna, I will slam-buck your souls into the next plane of existence! Do you understand me?!”
“Yes, Sergeant!”
“Meh, whatever, dude.”
Tweak nodded and turned to walk back to the table with the snacks, but cast one last glance over his shoulder at Shock ‘n Awe. “And I’m twenty-eight, ya putz!”
“All right, all right you had your fun but now it’s time to listen up!” Everypony turned their attention over to Mr. Cake who was sitting behind a desk with two stacks of paper next to him and a few pencils next to it. “Now I’m going to be the host of this little auction, seeing that every mare that was more qualified than I is wanting to bid on a stallion, so you will have to deal with it,” the married stallion laughed as more of the stallion that were to be auctioned looked to him.
“Now in front of me are blank pieces of paper and a stack of numbers. When you come up you will take one of the blank pieces and give a short description of yourself. This is what I am going to be reading to introduce you when you first go on stage. Please no longer than three lines. Then you will take a number, they are in a random order so it doesn’t matter when you get to sign up. Just tell me your number and that’s the order you will appear all night. Now no switching numbers, I don’t care when you want to go out it’s all up to mare luck,” Mr. Cake looked to the stallions who all seemed to be able to grasp the the concept. “Now get your flanks up here gentlemen! There are a lot of lovely mares out there that would love a date with one of you!”
At once a line started to form in front of Mr. Cake and his desk. Mac was filed somewhere in the middle of all of it, with Braeburn in front of him and Soarin behind him. Both stallions were still highly excited for this auction, while the dread as just growing in Mac. He didn’t know what number he wanted exactly, but he knew he didn’t want to go first or last. Both ends were trouble for him, first stallion out and all those mares would go crazy. If he came out last for everything, well that would just be horrible! He would be the grand finale! The one all the mares would wait for. Oh Celestia, please don’t make me last! he prayed to himself as they inched ever closer to the table.
Taking in the room again, Mac started to apply one of the skill not many ponies knew he was good at. Math. Only Apples knew that Mac took great pleasure in knowing how to do. Mac started to look up and down the line, doing a quick count of all the stallions in the room. With them all in a line it made things a lot easier. Alright, there’s jus about twelve of us here. Now if Cake shuffled them numbers like he does cards on poker night, those cards are going to be all scrambled up like leaves after a storm. The chances of me getting the last spot is a hundred to one! Mac thought happily as Braeburn finally reached the table.
Braeburn took his number first and gave a whistle of excitement. “Now lookie here! Ah’m the first one up!” he looked behind at the line of stallions. “Ah feel sorry fer you fellers! Them mares aren't gonna stop screaming for me till my cousin Mac here shows up on stage,” the cowcolt laughed as he started to write his little segment about himself. As soon as he was done, Mac reached for a blank piece of paper first, wanting to hold off on the number part as long as possible. Writing down just a few words, Mac reached for the numbers when they all fell to ground, as if a burst of wind had just came through the changing room and aimed right for them.
“Now why did you go and do that, Mac?” Mr. Cake laughed as he bent over to started to pick up the numbers again, “Jealous that your cousin got the number one slot?” he said smiling as he put the cards back up on the table, but, before he did thought Mac saw his hoof reach into his apron and pull out something. The movement was so fast, that Mac blinked his eyes a few times, trying to make sure it wasn’t his eyes playing tricks on him.
“Now what did yea-”
“Just some gum, want a piece?” Mr. Cake asked holding out a pack of gum towards the farm pony. “And pick a number already Mac, you're holding up the line.” Mac just nodded, still giving his old friend a questionable look. Mac slowly reached for a number and turned it over to see what is was.
Twelve
He was the last stallion. The last one to be go on stage for each event, the last one to be auctioned off at the end of the night. He looked at the number and then to Mr. Cake, who was already writing it down without even seeing it. “Now hold up there! You made them numbers fall over so you could-”
“I have no idea what you are talking about Mac,” Mr. Cake said calmly as he finished putting Mac’s number down in his notepad.
“Now move along, there are other stallions needing to go through,” he said. Before Mac could argue anymore, Braeburn pushed Mac to the side so Soarin could go next.
“Now that is how it should be!” Braeburn laughed, looking at the number Mac had taken. “The two best looking stallion going first and last. Them mares won’t know what hit them!” While Braeburn was finding this to be an act of divine intervention or fate. Mac could only grumble lowly as he looked down at the number. Act of fate it was not, but an act of some ponies trying to make some extra bits for the town. Most definitely.
PLEASE go faster for the next update
I've got a feeling that Blueblood is going to get the worst bid:
Maybe Granny Smith,
Maybe Rarity so she can torture him.
Whatever happens, Blueblood will be comically shocked at his highest bidder.
poor Mac, I'm just waiting for the bidding to start and Fluttershy dumps a royal treasury worth of bits to get her Mac'y
Hahahaha poor Big Mac...
*Sentry
It was expected
3973610 two words dude his MOM
Macdash is in the near. Future
any want to see the princess take one of the stallions my money is on Spike
agreed, faster update.
3973755
you think his own mom is going to bid on him?
I hope you're not thinking what I think you're thinking.
Updates shall appease us lot...
"Just get it ov'r...."
"Eenope!"
3973789 depends on the universe some guys have her play mom others friend and some say Twi it the mom. adn besides it makes sens an immortal gets with another imortal
This is going to be either one of two things completely epic, or an utter cluster F!@#, the auction not the story. Can't wait for more kind sir.
Hmmm perhaps someone could set up a side operation on betting who will win the bids as a secondary source of income, it will give the married, straight single stallions, and homosexual mares the chance to contribute as well.
Of course I wonder what kind of mess the auction will devolve into...
I want to see the stallion auction of its entirety!!!!!
Everyone's talking about update frequency, and I'm just waiting for Luna to empty the treasury on one lucky dude.
To the auction my good man, we have a mare filled stampede to watch.
Next chapter looks to be good, and Flash Sentry is shaking like a leaf. Today is a good day.
I'm liking this story so far, though I have to be honest, if it goes TwiSentry like it's hinting you might lose me.
ARE YOU READY TO SCORE SOME CANDY VAG?!
NO DRILL SERGENT!
THEN WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO GET?!
A NICE MARE TO DATE! ...Hopefully...
3973610 Or even worse, he gets a completely ugly mare that's madly in love with him, and when she pulls him in for a kiss he runs off screaming.
Is just me or somepony just trick BM?
Guh, Flash Sentry. Just the name brings back chills from watching that 'movie'.
3973504. I would like to but you have to remember Jake and I.have jobs and a life to manange first. Just be patient. Good things come to those who wait.
My bet is no one will bet on Blueblood. Rarity might've told all the mares about him and they hate him now.
evil cake-man. gotta love it
Not a huuuge fan of the writers OC being in the story. But hey as long as you don't hook your self up with one of the Main 6 or popular backgroud mares i could care less. anyway I'm looking forward to the next chapter.
3975200 Oh we are going to make fun of ourselves so much
3975246 Well then ima definatly gonna stick around to see this through.
Your very welcome my dear Captain ^^
Great chapter. Can't wait for this to continue.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA can't wait for the next chapter.
3975384 Should work now
Ohhoho poor Mac
Nice! Poor Mac, always singled out
Keep up the great work!
3974957 I don't know about that. Rarity's just one mare, and it's her word against old Blueblood's. There's bound to be some mare (probably a gold digger) that will be dumb enough to bid on him. But it's obvious all the mares will be focused on Braeburn and Big Macintosh. Braeburn because he's got that Southern Hospitality, and Big Macintosh because he's got swag. Soarin at best might cause a conflict between Rainbow Dash, Spitfire, Fleetfoot, and any other Wonderbolts or Wonderbolt recruits that might have a crush on him.
Found some things you may want to edit.
That should be, "accepted".
I think the word, "not" should be in there somewhere.
That should be "stallions".
And that should be capitalized.
3976447 Wait...why just his? Mine is a Earth Pony and you don't want to destroy it? It's because I am not in the Army! *Sob*
The probability of Mac getting last place is one in twelve. Not one in a hundred.
There are twelve numbers in total, the probability of picking a single specified number, in this case twelve, is just that 1 over the number of numbers available. 1/12
3977211 I am not Big Mac. I suck at math.
Braeburn is a western pony? Isn't Appleloosa located in the south, so technically he should be a southern pony.
Also, sweet another chapter, can't wait for more!
3974302 Bring popcorn. A situation such as this demands popcorn.
This is gonna be good
I'm real excited to see this updated, and am very happy with the story so far. I'd like to see more Turner/Whooves, but that's just personal preference. So far it's great. Keep up the good work!
More than likely, Rainbow will bid on Soarin. Twilight on Flash. don't know about the others.
... As I've mentioned before, we had a pageant much like this in the little Thruingian town I grew up in. Much like in your story, we were given a flash card and told to right how we would describe ourselves, our hopes and dreams - nonsense like that. Now, reading this got me thinking, 'I bet I still have one of those flash cards from so many years ago.', and I did; up in the attic is a box full of useless junk I brought with me from Germany. And so, I'd like to relay to you what my younger self so eloquently put on that flash card dated April 17th 2007:
Name: Gustauve W. A. Drakenhime III -note- call me Gus
Likes: Solitude
Dislikes: People
Hopes and Dreams: I hope that this will all be over soon, and I dream of a world where people would leave me the hell alone.
... I really seemed to have been a very well adjusted kid back then...
Anyways, sorry for wasting your time; this story is incredibly fun, if only for the massive amount of nostalgia it gives me. Please do continue on with the next chapter.
Mark was the last stallion on stage to be auctioned? Spike was sold then? Who bought it? Diamond Tiara?
3979376 What?
3977256 I will like to point out again I have only watched two episodes so I do not know.