Huge MLP FIM, Anime, Manga fan and basically any geeky and nerdy things! I'll wite anything to love stories, head cannons, etc. Thank you!!
Love is such a nice thing, so is True Love and Soul Mates but what about Forbidden Love? Both from different worlds, Changelings and Crystal Pony. Their parents had history together and what about an arrange marriage when one of them when that mare or colt turn 18? Will they upcome the odds and stay together, or will their nations bring them apart?
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Yeah... This could really use some editing. Verb tenses are off, there are run-on sentences, there's choppy language ("asked the white unicorn stallion the one the call Blueblood"?) and there's a lot of Shinning Armor instead of Shining Armor (one sounds like soccer equipment while the other is a name).
Interesting concept, but it's kindof messy.
2980271>>2980271
I'm terrible sorry, I know I need an editor but PLEASE don't give up on me!!!! I'll try beter.
So the changeling isn't a changeling? He's a hole-less alicorn prince? WTF?
I saw the concept and loved it, but the poor grammar and typical storytelling stopped me cold.
Find editors and proofreaders and I'll try it again.
Ok, it's better, but there are still some things that seemed off to me.
Spell your numbers out, it looks a lot nicer and more professional.
Sentence fragment.
This feels unnecessary. You already told us what she looked like when she was born a couple paragraphs earlier. This feels just long and unwieldy.
For some reason, it seems like you just picked random names for here. Are the guests important? If not, you could have it be like a gala an djust excuse the mother and let the party go on.
Also, Shinning Armor in the second to last paragraph.
It's better, I'll give you that, and it sounds like it could be entertaining, but it's still a bit rough in places.
Most certainly better, but still irks me.
1. Now Blueblood's a nice guy?
2. Why is Metamorphosis getting married?
3. Random Celestia and Luna background?
4. Run-on sentences.
5. The storytelling is still rather un-unique, people write like that in junior high.
6. Reasons listed in the above comment.
7. And most importantly; THE HOLE-LESS ALICORN CHANGELING PRINCE.
I hope I wasn't too harsh, but I felt this needed to be said.
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All will make since in due time, please just wait
While I find the baby talk amusing, this sentence doesn't feel right to me. Too much punctuation, a misconjugation (it should be 'shook'), and it's somewhat awkwardly worded. I might have written something like this:
But that's just, like, my opinion.
Metamorphosis is way too nice. Something bad's going to happen to him isn't it?
If bahut's comment is correct, I expect another one of... those stories.
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What do you mean one of those stories? If you don't like it then don't read it.
3098940 I forgot. I probably meant something along the lines of a sad tragedy. Eh, I still like it.
I like this. The story is very interesting and I would like to see where you are going with it.
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I have some great ideas for the story, but school comes first you know.... 
Can I ask you a question? What is your favorite character (from this story) and why.
Thank you!
Liberty. She is too cute!
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How is she 'cute'?
Well, I think her little speech just makes her so endearing!