The Divine Comedy: Twilight's Inferno

by Mint Tea

Canto V

Canto V

So I descended from first to second circle-
Which required a smaller pace and greater pain,
Which spurred more lamentation. Pinos the dreadful

Snarls at the gate. Almost towering Luna herself the pony
stood tall with a thick black mane and grey coat holding
no pupils to speak of. His cutie mark imitating

The gate behind him. Luna began, "This
is where all ill-begotten souls come down.
They come before him and confess all;

For every spirit its proper place in Hell.
A crowd of ponies always waiting, One
learns their judgment and are cast down."

Just as Luna finished her monologue, Pinos'
hoof hammered down on the stone floor
"YOU," he began, "who have come to sorrow's hospice,

Think well." Pinos stepped away from his current soul
to look at me with a furrowed brow.
"Beware how you come in and whom you trust,

Don't be deceived because the gate is wide
young pony." Luna met Pinos with her own
stomp of her hooves, shaking the same.

"Must you too scold this way?
Her destined path is not for you to impede;
My will be done Pinos."

With a grunt Pinos slowly made his way
back to his work, but not before passing me
a worried glance. I shivered.

The gate opened releasing a crescendo of agony;
Now I am where the noise of lamentation finds
its source. Comes at me in blasts of sorrow, I am where

All light is mute, with a bellowing storm of wind and ash.
Turbulent in a storm of warring winds,
A hurricane stood stories tall in perpetual motion.

Tossing all forms of pony, the wind tore at their flesh.
Twists of air torment them. If not above,
the ruined land only brought scars of tears, groaning, and laments.

Ash and sand slowly scratching away at helpless souls
crying out in anguish for some form of relief.
Their cries went unheard under the bellow of the storm.

I saw a couple uttering cries-wind tossed,
and scarred by the storm. "Princess," I cried,
"Who are these ponies, that suffer such pain?"

"These ponies defiled themselves to the pleasure
of the flesh," she began, "Those who have no convictions
towards their desire live here in unrest."

Pity overwhelmed me. Half-lost in its coils,
"Princess Luna," I asked, "is it possible to speak
to these poor ponies?" And she:

"When they drift closer-voice your request.
In the name of their love, that leads them, they will respond."
Soon the weather battered a red pony with a teal mane

towards us. I called out against the wind,
"Please...um sir! Can you explain
what could reason such a terrible fate?"

Luna spread her wings far and sheltered the quivering red
pony and myself from the wind. His form rose with pain
in his face. Bruises and cuts deep in his coat.

He gave shallow breaths, and finally a cough before
opening, "Must I relive my tale again Princess?"
He sighed seeing Luna's nod and began to weep.

"We suffer from this wind for many reasons;
whether it be a primal or selfish desire, we are
cast here for our disregard of restraint."

Each sentence ended with another hiccup.
The sensations in my chest could only prove
how weak and helpless I was to this pony.

"Love," he began, "which in gentle hearts is quickly born,
can torment a soul in more than one way.
Innocent at first, we join the herd with good intent.

We embrace friendship and the teachings it provides.
Yet soon enough for those such as myself, we indulge.
We enjoy too much. We turn love into lust."

A smile crept across the red ponies face as he wept.
I stood speechless listening to his monologue.
"That innocent manner you held yourself,

becomes consumed! With joy so strong you see it cleave;
the lust gets only stronger! His voice grew loud now in full grin,
The escape we long for did not reveal itself during OUR lives!"

"AND SO, WE LIVE HERE IN A NEW ETERNAL SHAME AHAHA!"
In hysteria the red pony galloped outside of the
safety of Luna's wings. Swept back into the

wind, the scream of the red pony echoed in my mind.
I wept under Luna, unblinking. My pity
Overwhelmed me and I felt myself go slack:

Swooning as in death, I fell like a dying body.

Comments

[The Commander]

GOD DAMMIT I WAS WRITING ALMOST THE SAME STORY! Well played

[TheMareinTheMoon]

I have to say, I'm interested tracked.

[wildberk]

[Dergmann]

Having read this in its entirety, I have to express mixed feelings. This was very well written, derived in Dante's style and utilizing all the right themes thus far. You also captured Twilight very well, I thought, and how she would react to all of this. That being said, the first canto could have used a little more explanation. I felt a bit confused as to why it was necessary for Luna to lead her through Hell. In the original work, the journey served to show Dante what would become of him if he continued along that Path. Now, perhaps you were trying for something different, perhaps at this point you dont really care. Ive personally found only a few of these stories, none ofthem finished, and thought that you earned a bit of constructive criticism. I encourage you to persue this story, as it has the makings to be something great.

[Diokno44]

Huh, considering its in game crossovers, I thought it would be the game. But still, nonetheless awesome. Now you should Ty your hoof at Paradise Lost!

[Aslfrasle]

One question I'd like to ask before reading, if you would. Are you planning to do Purgatorio and Paradiso as well, or just Inferno? I ask because your title includes "The Divine Comedy" which refers to Dante's trilogy of stories and not just Inferno.

[Starlight Nova]

Will Twilight be badass in this story?

[FolkloreBrony]

4619278
It's Dante's Inferno, not a James Bond film