Lacuna is the son of Wrath, ruler of the sixth level of Hell. He is everything you would not expect from a demon. He doesn't like fighting, he doesn't like torturing, he doesn't like fire or lava, he doesn't like possessing people to potentially create a Paranormal Activity 26 or something. But he does like flying, and he definitely loves reading, especially about the World of the Living.
Check it out! Someone actually made us a cover pic!
Also, for anyone giving the fic a 'thumbs down,' I'd like to hear why you didn't like it. I'm a stickler for criticism and I'm interested on how you think we can improve. Thanks!
Chapters (7)
Let's see where this goes
2626317 Let's do this thing!
2626577 Jw, do you have any pictures of Lacuna?
2626586 Drew one of him in his upcoming pony form. It'll become the cover pic when I get a chance to scan it in. I'll describe him more thoroughly in the next chapter, until then, something like this except his skin is dark grey? http://browse.deviantart.com/art/Demon-273585001
2626634 There is only one thing i can say to that picture ...
Co-writer and I just completely re-did this, if anyone's interested
Look, I'm not trying to piss you off when I say this, but this story needs some serious re-working. For starters, you have here a classic case of Gary Stu. A flying demon with teleportation who is the best swordfighter in hell is over-powered and unidentifiable. With some nerfing, such as only being able to glide and only blinking to familiar or visible points, the character would be a lot more likeable. Unfortunately, that isn't the only problem with the character. He also reads like a pubescent teenager, talking about being under-appreciated and how everything should just go his way. On the other hand, your descriptions, mythology, and concepts are excellent. You obviously have the skill to write an excellent story, but the character held you back and hindered an otherwise outstanding story.
Great story, granted he's a bit of a gary stu but i'm fine with this one. He doesn't really need nerfing in my opinion, he isn't THAT overpowered.
2646698 Funny story actually. Serious nerfing will occur in the living world. Mortal body, mortal rules. He gets an attitude change as well, no worries.
2646698 oh, and thank you for the tips. This is (obviously) my co-writer and I's first attempt at writing something that isn't for English class. We're open to any criticism you feel is necessary.
2647611 Well, that's something to be glad of. I've just become so used to OP OCs and bad characters that it didn't even occur to me that it was intentional.
2651545 Which is why I will do anything I can to avoid that. For now, just think of him as new Dante from that Devil May Cry reboot
After that, everything will be fixed... hopefully.
Interesting so far looking forward to see what happens next.
Looking forward to the next.
Please tell me this story isn't dead :(
4908421 Don't worry, it's only mostly dead!
I'm just kidding, I've actually decided to rewrite a lot of it. The story just wasn't quite jamming right with me. I want Lacuna to be the kind of character you'll really enjoy reading about, not just one of those overpowered perfect characters. Therefore, some the earlier chapters are being revised and I'm getting some new help with editing and writing.
It's coming someday, I haven't given up!
no update since 20th Jul 2013, RIP yet another HIE story