The Suicide of Twilight Sparkle

by Dream Daze

Rules

"Say something, Princess," said Celestia.

"Oh! Um..." Stuttered Twilight as she steped forward to the balcony.

She cleared her throat.

"A little while ago, my teacher and mentor Princess Celestia sent me to live in Ponyvile. She sent me to study friendship, which is something I didn't really care much about.

"But now," - Twilight signaled her friends forward - "on a day like today, I can honestly say I wouldn't be standing here if it werent for the friendships I made with all of you. Each one of you taught me something about friendship, and for that I wil always be grateful,"

"Today, I consider myself the luckiest pony in equestria. Thank you, friends! Thank you, everypony!"

A few hours later...

The three princesses were walking towards Celestia's chambers. It was a huge day for Twilight. A day that would change everything.

As they reached the entrance of the room, Celestia hugged her sister, as to say goodbye, then hugged Twilight. She had never before received a hug from the Princess. As she returned the kind gesture, she pondered about what it could've meant. As they parted, Celestia looked at Twilight-- an assertive stare. A congratulations? No... that wasn't quite it.

Twilight inspected Luna from the corner of her eye, she was looking at the floor, as if weighed by a great amount of thought.

"Walk with me, Twilight Sparkle," said Luna, as her sister closed the beautifully crafted double doors leading into her chambers. The sun was put to sleep, and it was the Princess of the Night's duty to watch over equestria until dawn.

Twilight nodded in agreement, and they both crossed the long tall hallways that made up the inside of Canterlot's castle. There was a heavy silence between the two ponies. Twilight stopped and looked out a window, there was a beautifully warm night outside.

"Let's go the castle's outpost. The night breeze is the purest there," Luna interveined, as if she read Twilight's thoughts.

The two ponies continued in silence down the hallways and up the stairs towards the outpost, not much was said in between, with the exception of a few of Twilight's attempts to break the ice that were blocked by Luna. It was obvious that she had something very important to say to her.

Twilight inhaled the fresh air from atop Luna's watchtower. The wind carried faint scents from foreign flowers. She thought about the ponies that lived on equestria before Nightmare Moon came to be, and how they could've possibly ignored the beauty and subtlety of the night.

But then again, maybe she appreciates it more because of what happened. Maybe if she had lived back then, she would've ignored it, just like anyone else.

"Twilight, there are not many ponies whom I can call a friend," Luna said, interrupting her thoughts. There was a sorrowful tone in her voice.

"Friendships last considerably less than princesshood."

It was clear as water now, what all this was all about.

"I understand." Twilight sat near the edge of the outpost.

"There are many things about friendship that you indeed do understand, Twilight Sparkle," continued Luna, "your vast knowledge about the magic of friendship was what allowed you to ascend," Luna closed her eyes, "This, I'm afraid. You do not.

"There's no greater pain than the loss of a loved one."

There was a force crushing Twilight's chest. The mere thought of watching her friends die-- no. She couldn't even think about such thing.

"You can't avoid the truth forever."

"But--" sobbed Twilight, "what am I supposed to do then?"

"You'll find a way to deal with the pain. My purpose bringing you here was to offer my shoulder and my wisdom." Luna paced towards Twilight and placed her hoof on her back "Ultimately, the answer must come from yourself. And it's best that you reach it on your own terms than to have it forced upon you when you're not prepared."

Twilight held back the tears were escaping from the corner of her eyes, "I will be prepared, when the time comes." She looked away into the night, "Thank you... Luna."

The two shared a long hug and proceeded to spend the night together, watching the stars, and talking. Twilight didn't want to sleep anyway. Not yet. And Luna had many stories to tell about ponies that she had loved... and watched wither away.

Twilight didn't realize it at the time, but that night was the night in which she mourned the death of all her friends.

***

There was a strong scent of apples and dirt in the air, which was no surprise, since it was basically all that was around them. Yellow-ish, brown-ish, orange-ish dirt and apple trees tall enough to block out the sunlight. It was surprising that anything was able to grew on that soil. Twilight concluded that they couldn't be in Sweet-Apple Acres, for the trees that grew there required plenty of water and a tender soil to grow. These were obviously a different species.

Bzzzzzt! The pain in the hoof returned, and this could only mean one thing.

"Fourty-five minutes," said Twilight, irritated. "To what?"

As she began to boil under the pressure of her own frustration, she noticed Fluttershy getting up, moaning softly as streched her limbs.

"Fluttershy, are you ok?"

She nodded, but was irresponsive otherwise.

At least she's not crying anymore... Twilight thought to herself.

"We have to work together to get out of this mess," Twilight began, with a cheerful and imperative tone, "first things first, we need to figure out what this timer is about."

Fluttershy was hiding behind her mane an awful lot more than what she used to, but still managed to show that she understood what she said. She got up on her back hooves and clopped her two front ones together.

An eerie, mechanical voice sounded inside their minds:

"Find the truth behind the voiceless pony. You have fourty-five minutes. Fail, and face erasure."

"The riddle!" Twilight yelped "That's what we need to solve before the timer runs out!"

Fluttershy nodded, still frowning.

"What else do you know about what's going on Fluttershy?" Twilight rose her voice, mostly out of concearn. She had to get them out of there, and she had to do it as soon as possible.

"Please, you have to tell me everything you know!"

Fluttershy turned her head down and avoided eye contact with her.

"What is the matter with you, Fluttershy? I've never seen you like this! Talk to me!"

In response, she began tearing up again. Twilight was suddenly aware of her tone.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Fluttershy. I didn't mean too--"

"--You should show more understanding," someone interrupted, "If you wish to help those who are hurting."

The two ponies froze in place and scouted the trees around them.

"Or maybe you're hurting as well?" The hooded figure reveled himself on atop of a tree. His brown cloak had massive pockets on the sides, filled to the top with apples,

"Tell me, Princess Twilight Sparkle--" he jumped down, landing a few feet away from them, "What brings you to the gates of Hell?"

The creature before them wasn't a pony-- it was a Zebra.

"Who are you? What do you want?" Shouted Twilight, hiding Fluttershy behind her, ready to zap the smirk out of that Zebra's face.

"Where are my manners, your highness? Kazir is what I am called." He bowed his head slightly. His mane was longer than Zecora's and had the same cut, but was combed to the side. It was covered by small, round wooden ornaments of many colors, but most of them were orange and black.

"Who'd knew the Princess who vanished would be in the Underground?"

His figure was heavily decorated. The ornaments he carried were strange, mostly exhibiting a heavy ammount of craftsmanship: the dozens of necklaces he had on his neck were woven together with colored string, leather and bits of wood that were sculped into tiny totems and figurines; the wood discs streching his ear lobes to at least four times their normal size had seemingly random circular patterns carved onto them.

"Vanished? Underground? What do you mean?"

"How unfortunate, it must be. To have that part of your memory as your entry fee. Someone must not want you to leave."

Twilight's horn stopped shimmering and she sat on the floor, hanging her head. "I just... don't know what's going on."

"I'm betting she does." Kazir nodded, pointing to Fluttershy. She remained silent, but her body language signalled she agreed with him.

"But... why--" Twilight stuttered, shoked at the fact that Fluttershy would hide something from her.

"--From the players, I would usually stay clear," he interrupted, "But one does not simply ignore royalty, so I must interfere."

"You're going to help us out of here?" Twilight asked.

Kazir shook his head, making the wooden disks on the lobes of his ears clop about.

"That I can't do, even if I wanted to. Come with me, disregard the time. It's only day two, you should be fine."

He turned about and started walking through the forest, signaling the girls to follow him. What were they supposed to do? Twilight let out a relieved sigh. That Zebra made her feel unneasy, or maybe it was the situation itself? Regardless, it felt great having someone willing to help them.

29:54; The clock was unforgiving. They must've lost at least ten minutes thanks to that Zebra. Feeling the pressure of time on her mind, Twilight began do distrust her new "Friend"

Maybe it's a trap?, she thought, if it is, I was blind enough to lead both me and Fluttershy right to it.

"We're here."

Kazir pointed to a natural cave to which a front wall made out of clay had been added. The wall had nothing more than a couple of windows and a makeshift wood door. He went inside and left the door open behind him.

She hesitated at the door, thinking to herself, This is it, Twilight. Your last chance to turn back and run.

She looked back at Fluttershy, and pondered for a short moment on returning. The feeling of dread and of nowhere to turn returned fast as a heartbeat. Where would I go anyway? If his intentions aren't pure, I'm sure he knows this woods better than us. He would find us if we ran.

Twilight swallowed hard and stepped inside. The interior was dimly lit, but was surprisingly clean and cozy. Colorful hoofwoven wool carpets decorated the floors and spherical glass doohickeys hanging by a thread dangled from the ceiling, holding some sort of light source within. A firefly, perhaps.

"I would offer you something to eat, but given your condition, I doubt you are hungry."

Kazir laid a plate of apple sauce on the table and sat down in front of it. He then signaled the girls to sit across him. Twilight sat on the chair that was furthest from the door, and Fluttershy sat on the other one. Her chair squeaked loudly, which made her jump a little in her seat.

"What do you mean by your condition?"

The Zebra let loose a hearty laughter, "You're in the Reaper's Game, my dear Princess! There is only one way in: lifeless"

"I'm dead?! That's absurd! That's-- that's more than absurd, that's downright impossible!"

"And yet, here you are. Surely you did not follow me to my home to question the knowledge I have to offer."

She paused, feeling her heart race. Her -heart- race, how could she be dead? She felt blood rushing through her veins.

Twilight calmed herself down... and lost it completely shortly after: When she placed a hoof on her chest, there was nothing beating inside of her. What she was feeling must be an illusion of some sorts, a remnant of the life she once had.

...the hollow pony... Am I... hollow?

"This can't be happening," she cried out.

Kazir was clearly getting impatient, which was funny, given his speach about pacience awhile ago.

I understand now. Twilight thought, this was what she was feeling yesterday, why she couldn't stop crying.

Rubbed her hoof on her forehead and signaled Kazir to carry on. This is it Twilight, gather as much intel as you possibly can. She arranged her posture and flicked her ears wide up. She was about to do what she did best, learn.

Kazir explained all that were to explain about the Reaper's game. It was a game where ponies who passed before their time got a second chance at life-- the one's who survived the game would be sent back home to their loved ones, those who lost were erased. Forever.

The game lasted for seven days, during which Players would race against the clock to complete the daily mission assigned to them. If any of the players completed it, all the players were safe for one more day, but if no one figured it out by the time the clock runs out-- pfft. Global Game Over.

He warned them, however, to never rely on others to fulfill the mission for them. As days go by, less and less players remain, and the missions tend to get worse. Today was a required exception to the rule.

The clock stung on the girls hoof. It stopped at 11:45, confirming Kazir's explanation. After the clock stopped, the Game Master could choose to set them asleep at any time.

Twilight's brain was in full throttle, assimilating new concepts and developing connections so fast that it was a wonder how her cutie mark wasn't about learning. She countered what she was being told by the little she already knew and had already seen, not only to verify the source, but also to give the much required explanation to the last twenty four hours that drove her half to madness.

The Game was supposedly hosted by "The Game Master" and the Reaper-ponies, who carried out his orders. He decided when, where and essentially if we woke up. He assigned the mission, he decided how much time we had, he was responsible for this, the Reapers moderated the whole affair.

Twilight felt conflicted. On one hoof, she felt like what this Game Master was doing was reprehensible, but on the other... he was giving ponies a second chance.

...well, if he can do such a thing, he should just give everyone the same chance, instead of handpicking someone like this, she concluded.

Kazir talked and they listened for a few hours. Fluttershy's seemed to be somewhere else during the entire time, but Twilight soaked up all that information like a sponge. As soon as the next day came, she would be ready for it.

Soon enough, without any warning, the girls fainted and vanished into thin air, leaving Kazir alone to his affairs once again.

He reviewed what he said briefly in his mind, and concluded that he did a decent job.

Good luck.

Author's Note:

I -was- supposed to upload this on Friday, BUT, since I managed to finish it early and Friday I'll be up to my ear lobes in textbooks and birthday cake, I decided I should just go ahead and publish it 8D

Again, I hope you enjoy the second chapter of my very first fanfic and I'm looking forward to writing the rest! ^-^

If you completely lost interest at some point, or if there was something that REALLY turned you off, do me the favor and post about it in the comments so I can avoid repeating that mistake :D thank you<3

Comments

[Reeve]

hang on, there were only 11 minutes on her clock, but it said they listened to Kazir for a few hours ... still a good chapter, its certainly shaping up nicely

[Dream Daze]

2517552

I reread that part, what happened exactly was:

1) They heard him for awhile;
2) The clock stopped at 11:45;
3) Then they continued to listen, and it lasted a few hours.

I don't think I switched the timeline o 3o but it's still a possibility. I switch up things all the time -w-"

Thank you for the support, Reeve

[Dream Daze]

2577974

Thank you for the review, Csquared :)

I'mma gonna go ahead and reply to your reply -w-

1) The hyphens escape me mostly because where I'm from, - is used instead of " to signal dialogue, so it's hard for me to notice them when they slip by my fingers xD

2) About the comma splices, yes, I'm aware I probably do that a lot more often than I should ^^U I'll give that situation extra extra attention from now on!

3) I use double hyphens instead of em dashes because they look similar and because my keyboard doesn't have an em dash xD Alt+0151, I'll keep that in mind ^^

4) I like your correction better :3

5) Naughty hyphens. I shall correct the rest.

6) I'll think of something to fix that phrase up. I need to underline the fact that she doesn't have total memory loss, she just doesn't remember what happened recently, so I can't use your fix this time :<

7) Splicing = Bad. Periods = Good.

8) I wasn't aware I was being unclear, I thought what needed to be said was implied, but I guess I stretched it a little. Better to keep it simple and clean, right?

About the last grammar correction paragraph:

Verb consistency isn't really something I'm aware of. I'm not very knowledgeable of the english language and most of the time I'm writing or talking by instinct, from hearing others or reading what other's have written. Sometimes my instinct is wrong, and correcting it isn't easy. I'll try to do something about it though :)

The cardboard cutout issue worries me quite a lot :< I made an effort to explain what they were feeling, and tried to make Kazir have some personality...

I'll review the second chapter and pay more attention to Twilight. I'll remove Kazir's rhymes and try to improve his character :) rhyming kinda limited what I could do with him ><

The infodump on chapter two was the bare essential, there are many other aspects of the game that weren't explicit there and that I plan on displaying later on, by-and-by. I'll reduce the amount on the second chapter even further to make it easier to swallow :D

I'm aware it feels kinda rushed, some of it is intentional. They're always against a clock. I'm also aware that there's a good kind of "feeling rushed" and a bad kind. I'll be more careful next time :3

Response to the summary:

Again, I can't thank you enough for taking the time to do this. I already learned so much since I joined fimfiction and I joined like, a month ago! xD

Also, I'll try to dig for a couple of editors, but I'm not exaclty sure of where I'm going to find some. :/

One last time, thank you very much for your help :D

[Csquared08]

2594899
I apologize for the late reply. I've been busy the past couple weeks, so I hadn't seen this.
I also just checked, and apparently I didn't get a notification for this. Odd...

Anywho...

1) I think I've seen hyphens used for thought before, but I'm not sure I've seen them for dialogue. So you have me curious: Where is it that people are taught to use hyphens for dialogue?

3) Actually, in conversation with other WRITE guys, it turns out the double hyphen is acceptable. However, this was only the case back before the internet and some word processors couldn't produce the em dash. To compensate, people using those substituted the double hyphen for the em dash. However, even if Alt+0151 fails, the em dash is now merely a quick Google search away. Thus, the need for the double hyphen replacement has passed, so I'd strongly suggest using the em dash.

I'll reduce the amount on the second chapter even further to make it easier to swallow

It wasn't the amount of content, or the even the content itself. Rather, it was the presentation of it. It read very much like a textbook. Yes, I got the information I needed. However, it was rather bland in its presentation. For a textbook, that's fine. However, I don't think you wanted a textbook, so you should change the presentation to make it more interesting. As I said in my review:

The first suggestion that comes to mind is to have Kazir make his explanation a story. Have him paint a picture for Twilight, a picture painted with words and explanations. Be creative.

Also, I'll try to dig for a couple of editors, but I'm not exaclty sure of where I'm going to find some.

I've heard that this group is good for that. However, I've never tried to use them myself, so I have no idea. Still worth a shot, I'd say.

One last time, thank you very much for your help

Not a problem, good sir!