New commission option: Pay me to post your story on Equestria Daily! · 10:23pm Apr 1st, 2013
This one probably won't last long, since the moment those fun-haters that are the rest of the pre-readers will catch wind of this I'll be banned, but hey, I figure I'm gonna get a few takers and I'm super poor!
Tired of having to have correct grammar? Want to thumb your nose at all those silly "strikes" that got you permabanned? Wnat yer sturees on eckdew to reed liek this and still get posted? Want to see your delicious pony porn featuring Derpy and Crackle on the biggest pony blog on the net? Want your epic tale of an OC alicorn fighting for the New Lunar Republic while shagging Prince Blueblood and murdering Sethisto while dropping dope rhymes about how your brony music is the best to get tons of hits from EqD coverage?
GIVE ME MONEY AND I SHALL MAKE IT SO!
I also offer a guaranteed "pass moderation on Fimfiction" option for slightly cheaper.
Ready to screw the rules with your money? PM me and let's make a love connection! (Note: stories featuring Rarity automatically cost 50% more to smuggle through.) 
HEY! I thought we had agreed that was OUR deal only!
Oh, the possibilities...
970403
SHH NOTHING TO SEE HERE MOVE ALONG
i175.photobucket.com/albums/w128/Timon1771/130257785671.jpg
What if it only features Rarity as a background character? Only 10% more?
Do you take cash, credit or gift cards?
970446
Why yes, all of those!
970423
Thirty.
Just 'cuz I'm whoring my position for money doesn't mean I don't have any standards. Sheesh.
970455
Okay, okay. Relax. Do you take bits of string, pop tarts, or used electronics for payment as well?
970470
Ramen noodles or the souls of the damned are preferred for non-monetary payment, but I'm sure we could work something out.
This is exactly the sort of forward-thinking entrepreneurial spirit this place needs! Vimbert for CEO!
Finally, I can get the exposure I deserve for my crossover clop, "All the Vampires in Twilight Sparkle"!
Is there a discount for gold members?
970504
Pfft, of course!
What do you take me for, a barbarian?
SCREW YOUR MONEY I HAVE YELLOW GLASSES!
Err, I mean... SCREW THE MONEY; I HAVE RULES!!!
Finally! The perfect entrepreneurial idea that appeals to pony lovers, fic lovers, and money lovers everywhere! At last, my dream of sharing my idea of an Alicorn Ninja named Sepiroth Goku can come to life!
How many words will $2.37 get me?
970745
Around 500.
Better work on telling rather than showing like a boss!
970770
The only solution will be to write in all caps! That way, I'll be telling extra loud! That's just as good as showing, right?
*Furious typing*
Do you take cash or check?
World's gone mad. MAD I SAY. D: *starts foaming at the math, flops on the floor, starts doing the DINOSAUR*
[Comment only available for Fimfiction® Gold™ members].
971335 [Comment only available for FiMFiction® Gold™ members]
971370:
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971370
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970770
I know this is an April Fools joke but...
Fifty bucks.
...was that a YGO:TAS reference?
972358
Damned right it was.
972364
You sir are fantastic.
EDIT: I'm a gold member! Hadn't realized
971421 Try this:
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973043
It's too late, the day has already past!
973077 ._.
The frist chapter of Fluttershy the werepony, how much
She needs some love
Absolutely disgusting. Yet another system adopts the freemium model after its inception. This isn't just something that you can tack on as an afterthought! Freemium models can be a huge disincentiviser if applied carelessly... Did we learn nothing from Real Racing 3?!
...how much to ban all
stories?