• Published 27th Sep 2019
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Dear Princess Sunbutt - 2Merr



Anon takes over Spike’s job of transcribing Twilight’s friendship reports. He does exactly what you’d expect.

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Letter 120

Hey Tia,

I’m at the dentist with Twi right now. She refused to go under for the procedure and she’s weirdly resistant to the numbing stuff, so they have her huffing happy gas right now. She’s saying a lot of funny stuff, so I thought I’d write some of it down for you and Luna. It’s word for word. Enjoy.


“Luna’s gotta go back to the moon. I did the math: she owes six a billion bits in taxing back tax evader for a thousand years. She would pay, right? Yeah. She’s a good pony, she pays. But she can’t pay. She has no money because she was on the MOON. And dOoOOon’t even hit me with that, “oh, she invested for a thousand years ago blah blah blah.” I did the research money, I know her money is gone after she got gone away. She can’t pay, we gotta send her back. It’s the only way.”

(A few minutes later.)

“Why does she can go and I can’t? I’m good! I don’t even [unintelligible] and no one even listens about it. I’m good. I’m a good pony, Anon. You’re a good pony, too. I miss Trixie.” (Trixie is in the room with us.)


Now imagine that, but heavily slurred and with a lot of slow, exaggerated gesturing. It’s great.

Love, Anon

P.S. - Trixie says hi.

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