Chapter 3
Rainbow Dash landed in front of the Ponyville Schoolhouse and immediately walked in. While there was nothing that said Cheerlie would be there today, it was the only place Rainbow Dash could think to look because she certainty didn’t know where the pony teacher lived. If she wasn’t there, then Rainbow Dash planned on going to Sweet Apple Acres and see if Twilight or Applejack knew where she lived.
However Rainbow Dash’s planning was not needed, because Cheerlie was in the schoolhouse, along with Rarity and Sweetie Bell. As Rainbow Dash slowly trotted in all three of the other ponies in the Schoolhouse turned to see who was walking in. Cheerlie and Rarity were both surprised to see Rainbow Dash in the schoolhouse. Rarity was the first to talk.
“Darling, fancy meeting you here,” she said. “What brings you to the schoolhouse?”
“I need to ask Cheerilee about something,” Rainbow Dash answered. “What about you? Shouldn’t Sweetie Bell’s patents be here instead of you?”
“Well normally the would be—after all a parent is responsible for keeping an eye on their kids schoolwork—however our parents had other engagements today and were unable to come,” Rarity explained. “So they asked me to come here instead and check up on Sweetie Bell’s progress. I didn’t have any large orders to fill in today so I was more than happy to help out my dear parents.”
“So what do you need to ask me about Rainbow Dash?” Cheerilee asked.
“Well I was wondering. Do Scootaloo’s parents keep a close eye on her school work?” Rainbow Dash was hoping that they won’t ask too many questions about her inquiries because of the situation, however she was expecting too much when it comes to Rarity being around.
“Why in the world would you want to know about something like that darling?” Rarity asked.
“You’re thinking what I’ve been suspecting for a while aren’t you?” Cheerilee said. Rainbow Dash was looking at Cheerilee completely surprised, Rarity was confused, and Sweetie Bell really had no clue what was going on and was getting bored.
“You knew?!” Rainbow Dash asked. “If you knew then why didn’t you do something about this earlier?”
“What are we talking about here,” Rarity asked, still not getting it. “Is there something going on that I haven’t been told of yet?”
“I said I suspected it,” Cheerilee said, answering Rainbow Dash’s question first. “I didn’t know for sure. Because I wasn’t certain about it I didn’t say anything on the chance I was wrong. But I was right, wasn’t I?”
“Will somepony please explain to me just what is going on here?” Rarity asked for the final time.
Cheerilee was about to talk but then she remembered Sweetie Bell was in the room and she didn’t figure this was a conversation to be had around a filly. So she asked Rarity if she could she could find someplace else for Sweetie Bell to be in at the time.
“Right,” Rarity said. To Sweetie Bell she said, “Sweetie Bell, why don’t you go to the playground and play for a bit? I’ll be out in just a moment to get you, but could you be a dear and go out until then. I’ll be sure to make it up to you by doing something that you want. Even if it involves me…getting dirty.” Rarity shuttered.
“Fine. I’ll go,” Sweetie Bell said. She walked out of the building and Rarity made sure she was out and playing before going back to the conversation at hand.
“You told us ‘a parent is responsible for keeping an eye on their kid’s schoolwork’,” Cheerilee told Rarity. It wasn’t a questing but Rarity felt obligated to nod anyways. “Well Scootaloo’s parents haven’t exactly been too keen on doing that themselves. I rarely see them, if at all. I was told they were just busy, and since I had no proof otherwise I didn’t say anything about it. But even if they were busy I can’t imagine they would be so busy that they couldn’t come in at least once in a while. Almost all of my other student’s parents manage to come in.”
“Really now?” Rarity said. “Something must be done of this then.”
“That’s why I’m here,” Rainbow Dash said. “I’m going to take this to court and get Scootaloo out of there.”
“Well that’s all fine and dandy, but what is to be done about Scootaloo afterwards?” Rarity asked.
“Well…if I’m getting Scootaloo out of her house…then I guess I have to bring her into mine,” Rainbow Dash said.
Rarity was surprised at that. “Really darling? Are you sure you’re ready for that? I haven’t seen you babysit yet and now you want to take Scootaloo in.”
“I’m not sure if I’m ready,” Rainbow Dash said, annoyed that this subject is being brought back up. “But I’m not going just leave Scootaloo, and if I take her out then I’m going to bring her into my house.”
Cheerilee was running through some drawers. She eventually found and got out a few documents and put them inside a large yellow envelope. She the envelope inside a saddlebag and then gave the saddlebag to Rainbow Dash.
“Give these documents to Twilight,” Cheerlie said. “She will be able to tell you what you can do with them.”
“Thanks Cheerilee,” Rainbow Dash said.
“No problem,” Cheerilee answered. “I just wish I could have done something like this earlier. I almost feel like I failed one of my students by not looking into this more. If you’re really going to work for it, then make sure to right this wrong for me.”
“I guess I know how you feel,” Rainbow Dash said. “I wish I saw that before as well. But I only paid attention to myself and didn’t worry too much about it when I first heard her parents were not teaching her how to fly. I obviously had a good start at taking care of her.” That statement was said bitterly.
“I would take a look at Scootaloo’s grades over the past few years before you jump to those conclusions. You might find them surprising,” Cheerilee said. “Though speaking of grades; remember Rainbow Dash, when you gain custody over Scootaloo you are in charge of keeping an eye on her progress.”
“I understand,” Rainbow Dash said. “I spend my weekends in Ponyville, so I’ll be able to come in then.”
“Ok. Remember, if you need anything else, don’t hesitate to ask,” Cheerilee said. “I’m willing to do whatever I can to help my student.”
“Thanks again Cheerlie,” Rainbow Dash said before turning to leave.
“Darling, just give me a few seconds to drop Sweetie Bell off at my place and I’ll join you,” Rarity said.
~
Rainbow Dash and Rarity both walked into the library together to see Twilight, Spike, Applejack, Fluttershy, and Pinkie Pie all there as well. Twilight was levitating up the same document that she was looking at before Rainbow Dash left and everybody was looking at it with her. So it took them a while to realize that Rainbow Dash and Rarity walked in. Rainbow Dash was about to interrupt them, but Rarity stopped her and had her wait. Eventually everybody looked away from what they were doing and saw Rainbow Dash and Rarity.
“Hey Rainbow Dash and Rarity. Good to see you two,” Twilight said with obvious forced cheer.
“Uhh Twi,” Applejack said. “Ya’ll are bein’ kinda obvious here. Ya might as well just tell her.”
“What’s going on?” Rainbow Dash asked, starting to get worried by her friends’ reactions.
“Fine, I’ll tell her,” Twilight told the light brown Earth Pony. To Rainbow Dash she said, “Do you remember that document I was looking over?”
“Yeah, what about it?” Rainbow Dash asked. As she asked that both Soarin’ and Spitfire walked into the library. In acknowledgement to Spitfire, Rainbow Dash saluted and said “Captain.”
“I’ve heard about your situation and I’m here to help,” Spitfire said. “So what’s on the agenda right now?”
“This,” Twilight said as she levitated the document higher. “Rainbow Dash, this is a copy of your contract for the Wonderbolts. And while everything else is fine on it, even with the amount of money your making, you’re not making nearly enough to match the amount Scootaloo’s parents are.”
“Are you sure there is nothing Rainbow Dash can cut?” Rarity asked. “After all, whenever I need to make ends meet I will usually attempt to cut some things.”
“I’m looking at how much Rainbow Dash makes, not how much she makes and spends,” Twilight said. “So even if Rainbow Dash cut back on a few things it still wouldn’t be enough.”
“Hey Spittie!” Pinkie Pie said. “Maybe you can give Rainbow Dash a raise! Or maybe two raises. Or maybe you can give her so many raises that she will be able to reach the moon and the stars! Wouldn’t that be great, seeing the moon from space! You’d be able to see what Luna saw; well except for she didn’t see it much because she was inside of the moon. What does the inside of the moon look like anyways? I bet it looks so cool inside there! Maybe I should ask Luna some time!”
“Pinkie Pie!” Everybody except for Fluttershy yelled.
“Sorry,” Pinkie Pie said.
“No I can’t give Rainbow Dash a raise,” Spitfire said. “The Wonderbolts can’t afford to pay for a raise especially since we could lose a contributor from this. However, there is something that can be done. Right Soarin’?”
Soarin’ was thinking about how exactly he was going to ask Rainbow Dash and when to do it and was only half listening to the conversation at hand. So he was caught completely off guard when Spitfire said that. He wasn’t exactly sure when a good time was, but he was certain this was not it.
“Hey…what?!” Soarin’ stuttered.
“Don’t you have something to ask Rainbow Dash?” Spitfire continued.
“Wait now?!” Soarin’ asked. Spitfire nodded and Soarin’ almost groaned. When he imagined this happening he imagined it at a much better time. In fact right now he almost couldn’t imagine a worse time to be doing this.
Everybody was looking at the two with various levels of confusion from “What the heck is going on?” to “Pinkie Pie.” The only pony who wasn’t looking with confusion was Rarity, who was looking with anticipation. Soarin’ was really uncomfortable at their glances and wanted to do anything but ask, however he know that if he didn’t do anything the situation would get even more awkward.
So he walked up to Rainbow Dash and stared straight into her magenta eyes, eyes that he admittedly loved gazing into. He sat down and lifted Rainbow Dash’s right hoof with his own. All the while he was thinking of exactly what he was going to say…while thinking, I’m so dead. She is so going to kill me for saying this. He took a deep breath and then began to speak.
“Listen Rainbow Dash. You don’t have to worry about any money issues. Because if you want to, you will have two Wonderbolt salaries to your name. Mine and Yours. Rainbow Dash, I love you. I love you more than a nice crisp and juicy Apple Pie.” Soarin’ reached inside his saddlebag and grabbed out a small jewelry box. “And I want to be with you forever. Will you marry me Rainbow Dash?”
“Soarin’…” Rainbow Dash started.
“I’m not just doing this because you need the help,” Soarin’ cut her off. “I was planning on proposing to you in a month when we’re off season anyways. So I’m only doing this a month earlier than planned. You can even ask Sptifire, I hid the ring with her.”
“Soarin’…” Rainbow Dash said with even more intensity. Soarin’ stayed silent waiting for Rainbow Dash’s response. Rainbow Dash closed her eyes for a few seconds thinking of what she was going to say as well. She opened her eyes and looked around at everybody else.
“Spitfire?” Rainbow Dash asked to be sure.
“Yes, he was hiding the ring with me,” Spitfire said. “He bought it a few weeks ago and his plans were to propose to you next month. Everything he has told you he first told me when he asked to hide the ring.”
Rainbow Dash sighed. She then looked Soarin’ right in his emerald eyes. “You know I don’t really like this. If Twilight is right, I’m not given much of a choice here. I basically have to either accept your proposal or I’m not able to help Scootaloo. I hate being trapped with nothing to do and forced to accept some other pony’s help. Even if it’s from you.” Rainbow Dash took another deep breath. “But you were planning on doing this anyways. And I guess…in any other situation I would have said yes. But as for this one…while I wish you could have proposed at a better time I won’t look a gift horse in the mouth. Yes Soarin’, I will marry you.”
A large cheering resounded from Twilight, Pinkie Pie, Fluttershy, Applejack, and Rarity. Spitfire looked at them while trying to hide a small smile from her face. And Spike…was making a gag face. Soarin’ and Rainbow Dash embraced, and when they backed up again Rainbow Dash had one last thing to say on the subject.
“Just…don’t ever compare me to food again,” Rainbow Dash said, playfully and seriously at the same time.
“Can I say that your kiss is sweeter then Apple Pie?” Soarin’ asked.
Rainbow Dash thought about it for a few seconds. “Ok you dork," Rainbow Dash said with a small chuckle. "I’ll accept that every once in a while. Just don’t overuse it ok?”
Spitfire cleared her throat to get everybody’s attention. “Now that we have that over I recommend we put together everything that we have and go over it for when the trial starts,” Spitfire said. “I know you two have some wedding planning you want to do, however we have more pressing issues at hand.”
“Right,” Rainbow Dash said. She gave her saddlebags to Twilight. “Cheerlie gave these to me to give to you.”
“Thanks,” Twilight said. “Let’s see what we have to work with. We need to use everything we have if we want to save Scootaloo.”
Stats
Page generated in 0.034 seconds
Total duration
1,018 users online
2,010,606 hits today, 2,280,440 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
I'll say this was good and awesome.
I'd say this was well done, though there were a few spelling issues here and there.
However, there is definitely room for improvement, especially in the area of character development and interaction. While I can say that you probably captured Rainbow Dash and Twilight pretty well, I think you could've done the others better. With Rarity you used the term "darling" way too often, and Pinkie Pie....well, actually, you did pretty good with her, but whenever she says something, you need some adverbs and stuff to go along with the spontaneous things that sprout from her mouth. That also gives her character and allows the reader to see what she's doing more clearly, which is crucial with Pinkie Pie, seeing as almost everything she says has a movement to go with it. Applejack I think you did okay with, but again could use more character development. Fluttershy I can't really judge, because she didn't say much in this chapter, but perhaps that was the point (what with her being Fluttershy and all).
So there's just a few things that I thought could help improve your story by a lot. Also, an art cover would be beneficial to you. Do you have one that is currently being done for you?
I laughed my head off at the Apple pie.
So far it's okay but there's one big thing bothering me, what about Scootaloo herself? Where's her say in all of this?
2205113 That is the million bit question, as is the issue of the fact that we've had no interaction with Scootaloo's parents whatsoever over the course of this story. It's hard to believe that anypony would even attempt to start a custody battle over Scootaloo without actually meeting (or perhaps covertly observing) her parents to determine the level of care that they actually provide her. The big thing is that the characters are coming to a lot of conclusions about Scootaloo's parents without actually investigating them directly. So things are looking kinda shaky. At this point, I'm suspecting that the author may be deliberately keeping them out of things to keep us in suspense as to the true degree of their negligence or mistreatment of Scootaloo.
I'm enjoying this! Still a few issues with grammar, but nothing major. Although it's 'Cheerilee', not 'Cheerlie'. :)
I'm just wondering what's gonna happen when Scoots finds out about all this. ^^
So many comments to reply to!
2204552 Thanks
2204923 Would you mind pointing some of the spelling errors I made so I can fix them?
Good to note for when I continue writing.
And no, I don't have any cover art being made for me.
2205025 I was thinking of the song lollipop while writing this so...
2205113>>2206380 Scootaloo will be told in the next chapter. So Scootaloo's feelings will finally be revealed.
2205276 You may or may not be right. You'll just have to see
I know its too late now,but you should focus of detailing it more.
It's a great story and a nice plot,but you are going a little too fast.
This song was going on in my head when soarin purposed to rainbow
2207271 If you re-read it, it says A.J. is brown... but she's orange...
this is a good story
Dawwww
. That's so adorable!
SWEETIE BELLE with an "e" Good story though
I'm curious as to this scale of confusion, is "Pinkie Pie" it's highest or is there something higher
applejack is orange and soarin' is a very light blue.
It's funny how Scoots don't know nada 'bout dis yet...