Zim, an Invader serving with the Irken Empire, is tasked with conquering a distant planet known as Equestria by the Almighty Tallest. Inhabited by a race of talking ponies, will Zim outwit them and clandestinely conquer the planet in the name of the Empire? Or does he underestimate their ability to see through his subterfuge and fight back?
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Wow... this is really good!
When's the next chapter?
I hope in the story's on coming chapters that Zim's control over fluttershy will shatter causing Zim's whole progress to die out
4306
Later this week, hopefully.
I am happy by the response so far. However, I do know that Gir is slightly out of character, and I did this because I wanted to keep the spotlight on Zim. Gir is pretty insignificant in this fanfic.
Heh, this is actually turning out pretty good! Considering people in Equestria are a bit smarter than the people from the earth Zim originally intended to invade, I'm sure everypony will come to their senses and...
*takes an extra long look at Cheerilie's segment telling Applebloom to apologize to Zim*
... Right then, I guess Equestria's fallen prey to the obliviousness virus. The only hope for their race at this point is Pinkie Pie and Applebloom. Well, let's hope nothing bad happens to anypony while Zim's being his usual careless (and cruel) self.
It's a great story so far, but there's one thing you should probably fix up. Fillies aren't kid ponies, they're young girl ponies. The word you're looking for is Foal
4323
Thanks for the critique. I will fix the terms up as soon as possible.
the story is nice but a filly is a female horse zim would be a colt a male horse
need more chapters! and it would be awesome if gir meets derpy they are hilarious and they both like muffins
4587
More chapters are coming soon, I assure you.
WHEN'S THE NEXT CHAPTER!
7582
I'm still working on it. But school and other obligations have cut that time away. It's over 4,000 words at the moment.
You may want to change the title to leave out the "Kidnapping of Fluttershy." It just seems like giving away a little too much information about what happens in the chapter right away.
genius! never would have thought of this. please make more soon!
oh, and make sure not to mix Gir with pinkie pie, the results could be catastrophic (ly-awesome).
It be funny if the cmc/spike were stop by gir and he did this.
"COME ON LET GO TO THE NIGHT CLUB!!" GIR said insanely as he picked up scootaloo and began running to the night club.
the remaining three watch this spectacle weirdly
"Okay..." Sweetie belle said a bit creeped out.
It be funny if the cmc/spike were stop by gir and he did this.
"COME ON LET GO TO THE NIGHT CLUB!!" GIR said insanely as he picked up scootaloo and began running to the night club.
the remaining three watch this spectacle weirdly
"Okay..." Sweetie belle said a bit creeped out.
Applejack picked up her paintbrush and continued painting the barn door. “Well, Dash, Applejack just came running in here like you wouldn't believe, and she was raving about how Fluttershy had been ponynapped by this 'alien' she saw at school. Can you believe that? Never thought she had such a rich imagination.”
55899
Thanks for catching that one. Will be corrected.
The one thing I'm finding to be a problem with this story (other than the fact that you went like 2 months between updates) is that in the actual show Zim isn't nearly as smart as you're making him out to be. I can see that you're trying to make him look stupid, but in the show itself he's such an idiot that the only reason he goes unnoticed is because almost all the other characters are even dumber than him. Also, in the show, it's not just that he's stupid; he's also incompetent, whereas in this fic he's actually showing a rather proficient MO.
56030
Thanks for the feedback. While I agree that I am making Zim seem a little smarter than he really is, Zim is far more intelligent than what his mannerisms suggest. But I do agree, he is very incompetent and doesn't have a great capacity for carrying out his plans.
For example, he tricks Dib in "Future Dib" by sending an imposter (of Dib) back in time to warn the present day Dib of Zim's plans to destroy Earth by sabotaging Professor Membrane's free energy machine. And he nearly succeeded, if it weren't for Gaz.
The only way this fic can work is if Zim wins a little. But, rest assured, the ponies are going to win.
And, sorry for the delay. I had this on the backburner for a very long time, but I kept re-writing certain parts because I was unsatisfied with previous results.
Wow I had to wait a lot for this, but I got to say, great job. Although Zim seems a little too competent, Also try to make him sound like him, like when he calls humans pig worms or something, maybe calling scootaloo a chicken.
Invader Zim crossover.YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Zim seems surprisingly competent this time around.
YOU MUST MAKES MORES!!!
The theme in the first chapter was surprisingly Bridle Gossip/Zim's version of human world.
Eeeeeh...
I'm sorry but I'm opting out of this story early.
Not far in and the dialogue is already distracting. I'm pretty damn skippy that Gir was never on a first-name basis with Zim.
It really is the details that tell you if a crossover is gonna be worth a damn, because it's ESSENTIAL to be able to duplicate the characters to an impeccable level so as to be able to believe them when their voices speak inside your head. It's a bad sign if the first scene's worth of lines don't scream the character's names.
I mean, you don't need to start GIR out yodeling while swinging from a chandelier... but... say this scene:
See, even GIR saying "creature" feels out of character, unless he's in Duty Mode or something.
I'd have gone for something more like this:
I'm surprised no one spotted this when you were writing it but why is applebloom so hell bent on saying he's an alien? It comes out of litarely no where? All she knows is he's not a pony and seeing as theirs plenty of them on their planet so it could be anything, she hasn't seen him out of disguise at all and don't say that she heard him talking about the irken armada and that suddenly made her think aliens because that makes no sense. Why would that make you think alien the only one who should be thinking alien is pinkie and that's because she saw it all applebloom knows is that a non pony went to school as a pony and some armada is trying to invade non of that should scream alien to her because again unlike earth theirs multiple races on her planet.