Realms of Discord

by Chilly Quill

Chapter 11

Earlier at the Shop...

Rose Wind fluttered over Wild Mint's head as he walked upstairs. “So you two live above your shop now? It doesn't seem like a good deal.”

Mint grinned. “You'd be surprised how good the place is.” He paused to let Rose go past him as he neared the top of the stairs. She caught sight of the living room and almost forgot to keep flapping her wings. “complete living room and kitchen with two beds and a bathroom. We even have a spare room, which you'll be sleeping in soon enough.”

Rose's jaw almost didn't comply as she talked. “This place is better than the house I lived in. All I had was a single room that I used for everything.” she paused, looking at the spare room. “Even that was paradise compared to my other lodging though.”

Wild Mint walked into the spare room, pulling out a mop, broom and feather duster. “Well as soon as we get you a bed you're more than welcome to take this room. After all, if you're going to live here you need your own room.”

Mint tossed the feather duster to Rose, who caught it absently. “Well I suppose if your offering, I can't refuse. Don't think this is permanent though.” Rose flew back downstairs, somehow moving with a spring in her wings.

“Yeah,” Mint mused, “I'm sure your just thinking of somewhere else to be.”

before Wild Mint could even reach the stairs, he heard a loud crash. He glanced downstairs and saw Rose had crashed into the stack of chairs, knocking them over.

Rose Giggled, fluttering over the fallen stack. “I guess I wasn't paying attention. Don't worry though, I'll get it.” Rose shifted out of her disguise, using her horn to levitate the chairs back into their stack. “Why'd you put these right near the stairs?”

Mint glanced at the railing that Rose had flown over. “Normally we don't expect ponies to fly over the stairs.”

Rose glanced behind her and blushed. “I guess I'll just get to work then.”

Wild Mint walked downstairs, mop and broom balanced on his back. “You can work on the ceiling for now. I'll sweep down here.”

The first half hour passed by in silence, the quiet brushing of floor and ceiling the only noise to occupy the two. Wild Mint tried to whistle to amuse himself, but found the silence would always return. The lack of noise finally got to him, making him speak up. “So where do the Changelings live when they aren't mixing in with ponies?”

Rose sighed. “If we aren't feeding on love we go back to our hives and hibernate until we wake up.”

Mint dropped his broom and started filling up a bucket of water. “So you just sleep? I thought Changelings follow the orders of their Queen or something?”

“Not around here. Your cities are full of false love. It's hard to sustain a Queen's hunger with so little love to feed on. All of the hives in Equestria are sleeping. Any Changelings that wake up either leave to try and survive on their own or give themselves to the Queen.”

Wild Mint snapped to Rose, looking at her in shock. “Do you mean you guys-” Mint paused though, unable to finish. Rose nodded though, knowing what he meant. “I can't believe your Queens are so desperate.”

Rose grinned. “It's not so bad, actually. Without the Queens there's no hive mind. Without the hive mind, we're allowed to think and act for ourselves. We get a choice.”

Mint grinned. “I suppose that's always nice.” Mint finished his mopping, setting the mop against a wall. “Do you miss your hive though? They are your family.”

Rose shook her head, floating onto the floor to start dusting the tables. “A hive isn't really a family for us. Without the Queen, we don't have much reason to stay with one another.”

Mint nodded absently, picking up a duster himself and dusting off the bar. “With competition for food, I suppose it's not a good idea.”

The two resumed their work in silence, dusting off table after table. Niether paid attention to the other, only backing up as they dusted. Soon the two reached the same table, unaware of the other. Mint bumped into Rose as she was dusting, making her jump up in shock. “What are you doing!” She shouted from above.”

Mint looked up, his eyes wide for a moment. “I was dusting. What are you doing?”

Rose glared at Mint, her wings fluttering only a bit. “Trying to get away from you, freak! What did you do?”

Mint backed away a bit. “Nothing, I promise you. But could you stop flying for a moment?”

Rose blinked. “What is this, a joke? Why would I stop in the middle of the air?”

“Just do it.”

Rose sighed, folding her wings against her back. Something yanked her horn and Rose found herself suspended in the air, a great pain in her horn. “AH! What's going on?!” Rose screamed. “Why can't I get down? What's holding my horn?!”

“Just calm down.” Mint said calmly. “Just relax.”

“RELAX?! THERE'S SOMETHING YANKING ON MY HORN AND YOU WANT ME TO RELAX!?”

Mint grinned. “Yes. All you did was jam your horn in the ceiling.”

Rose glanced up at her horn, noticing a portion of it had lodged into the wooden ceiling. Rose sighed, flapping her wings so she couldn't feel her horn being subject to gravity. “I blame you for this.” She growled. “Now you get to find out how to get me out!”

Mint glanced at her horn and at the floor. “Why don't you try pulling your own head out?”

Rose flapped her wings until she could plant her hooves on the ceiling , with all he might she pressed against the wood, trying to yank her head out. She gave up a moment later, her head no more free than before. “Any other ideas?”

Mint walked around the Changeling, surveying her horn with great focus. “I could always just cut the wood around your horn...”

Rose shrieked, covering her horn with her hooves. “You are NOT coming ner me with a saw!”

Perhaps a knife then-”

“NOTHING SHARP!!”

“Alright!” Mint shouted. “Nothing sharp. God.” Mint glanced at the horn again. “But you don't have many options. Can't you just get rid of your horn with your disguises?”

Rose's eyes gleamed. “Great idea! Let me try.” Rose lit up her horn, the light rising from her forehead up her horn. As soon as the light hit the wood of the ceiling, though, the light backfired, going back to Rose and shocking her. “Alright, that's not gonna work.” Rose said wearily. “Anything else?”

Mint sighed. “Why don't I try pulling you out myself?”

Rose grinned. “Great idea. Fly on up and pull the sword from the stone. How are you supposed to get up here?!”

Mint frowned and sat down. “Do you want my help or not?”

Rose looked down in fear. “Yes!”

“Then stop berating me. It's not my fault your stuck up there.” He glanced back up only to be met with a cold glare. “Well it's not completely my fault anyway.”

Rose sighed. “Fine. Just please help me.”

“Thats the spirit!” Mint jumped back up on his hooves, surveying Rose one more time before grinning. “I'll be right back!”

Rose frowned. “Where are you going?” Mint didn't answer but ran out the door. “What are you doing?!” Rose was left alone for half an hour, fluttering around and occasionally yanking against the ceiling. Wild Mint finally returned, four plungers and a roll of duct tape in his mouth. Rose glanced at the supplies in disbelief. “This isn't exactly a plumbing problem.”

Mint unscrewed the plungers from their handles. “Just trust unorthodox ingenuity, my friend.” A few moments and some duct tape later, Wild Mint had taped the plungers to his hooves. A few tests against the wall had Mint struggling to get his hooves off the wall. The suction finally gave way, making Mint fall over. “I think this is going to work well!”

Rose watched incredulously as Mint slowly placed all four hooves on the wall, holding himself firmly against the vertical surface. “I don't believe what I'm seeing.” Rose said out loud.”

Mint grinned as he slowly ascended the wall. “If a unicorn and pegasus can reach a ceiling, so can I!”

A few agonizingly slow moments later, Wild Mint had reached the ceiling, making the steady transition from vertical to complete inversion. Rose grinned as he walked over to her. “Never thought I'd be saved by a plumber.”

Mint grinned, slipping a hoof out of a plunger. “Actually I'm a carpenter.”

Mint Placed his hoof against Rose's forehead, making her flinch. He pressed against her head a few times, Rose squeaking with each press. “What are you doing? I'm not a toy!”

Mint grinned. “I didn't think Changelings were squeaky toys.”

“We're not! Stop messing around!”

Mint slipped another hoof out of its plunger shoe and placed it on the other side of Rose's forehead. “You may feel sudden pressure to your forehead!” He shouted.”

Rose glanced up at Mint. “What are you going to-” Mint pressed his hooves against Rose's head with all his might, forcing her head down. “OW! Stop that! You're going to break my skull!”

Mint grunted, pushing against her with more effort. He watched Rose's horn slip out of the wooden ceiling a bit. “We're making progress though! You'll just need to tough it out!”

Rose gasped. “But it feels like my brain's going to be crushed!” Rose started flying in every direction, trying to get Mint's hooves off her head.”

There were noises from below, but Wild Mint had devoted his focus to keeping his hooves in place. “Would you hold still for a moment?” He growled. “I've almost got you out!” His hooves lost their purchase on her forehead as Rose slipped to his side. In an effort to keep hold, Mint wrapped his hooves around her waist, now trying to use gravity to his advantage.

A groan of wood and a final shriek from Rose later, the two fell from the ceiling, hitting the ground head first. Mint looked up and found Nigma staring at them.He grinned as the two looked up at him, both rubbing their heads. “So what did I miss?”

Rose groaned as she used her magic to go back into her usual disguise. “You don’t want to know.” She trotted over to a dropped feather duster and fluttered off, resuming a long forgotten dusting job.
Nigma glanced over at Wild Mint but was answered with a shrug. “It’s a long story.”