5 Words at a Time

by mBrooksBrony

...because 425 Words isn't Enough to Submit on FimFiction.net

Feeling confident he had won, the evil menace decided to keep his distance, for now, as revenge was indeed imminent. Just then, Twilight showed up to punish her rebellious dragon. She wielded a fiery paddle. Spike remembered it too well, while planning to escape punishment. He ate some magic tacos to boost his speed stat before growing giant pegasus wings that would easily embarrass Zapdos. However the tacos were sentient, giving him a wing boner. This turned him into a magical dragon taco that flies.

Twilight couldn't stop him, unless she gave him some GAK. She binned it, and proceeded to calling the U.S.M.C. to send an Apache helicopter with machine guns and missiles. She had a bite of cheese. Spikes rage was over 9000, and so it turned out he had full Dragon armor because Daedric was too mainstream. This Hipster-ism angered the army. Nevertheless, they unleashed a barrage in the direction of the nuclear powered tree library, causing a massive explosion, destroying the facility and exposing Twilight's gigantic, long, black, hot and juicy sweatshop of filly book arrangers.

She was terrified, especially when one of the bodies began to move, twitching like a salmon in sexual acts, because of the radiation caused by Bieber's music. Spike had fled to Fus Ro Dah valley, home of the true Dovah. The Dovah saw Spike and realized his child had returned! He alerted the other dovahs who swiftly took the young dragon to their private quarters. Spike then began to remember Twilight's dream.

Before him stood the dreaded Mr Cheese Grater. It all made sense to him now. Twilight's dream. Her lust for cheese, her gigantic nuclear tree factory. Cheese is notorious to make you dream! She desired to harness the awesome power of dreams with a reality converter, causing ANYTHING the mare dreamed up to manifest in the physical world... and that was her plot.

Spike stood bewildered as Mr Cheese Grater stood over him grating cheese all over, menacingly. Emerging from the shadows, came a manifestation of Rarity. She would save Spike, but had to choose between him and Tom. Before she could decide, a whistle sounded signalling the attack of the fore-mentioned parasprites, returning. Then Gandalf arrived to help, and so did Bilbo Baggins.

Gandalf's staff tuned into a banjo. Only one instrument, but just enough to assist Spike in destroying the Death Star taking the parasprites with it. "It's a trap!" said Gandalf as Tom tackled Spike to the ground despite being inanimate. "Spike, I am your father" revealed Tom, Spike's tail crushed. That instant, the Death Star fired a laser, disintegrating Tom, Spike's armor protecting him from the blaze. Rarity began to cry as she had witnessed her love's eternal demise. Of all the worst things that could happen, this was definitely the most worst possible thing.

Derpy swiftly appeared, donating Rarity one of her fresh muffins, also giving her a letter. Rarity opened it. It read:

"Fuck you. Now my muffin is working its way to your stomach where it'll explode. You must find the antidote. I hope you're happy. The antidote can be found in Cloudsdale. Good luck in flying all the way there.

Signed, Derpy Hooves (Derpy Mail)"

Rarity hadn't eaten the muffin, therefore she was safe! It began to speak a plan. "So we grab the kids, bring Spike, kill Derpy (sorry!), grab a balloon, go to Cloudsdale, drink the nice cold antidote and wait for all this to blow over!" But before the muffin's plan could begin, a giant black wet dog appeared out of no where.

And then Spike woke up.

"WHAT THE BU-"

The End.

Some very special thanks to all that took part in the writing of this fic. It was definitely more fun to write than it will be for the rest of y'all to read!

"JK Rowling and Terry Pratchet can't touch deeez literary skills. Well done bronies."

-David Beeby

Author's Note:

This chapter was originally never meant to be. After over 80 comments, we had our FimFic pretty much done. However, FimFiction.net ask a minimum of 1000 words total before a fic can be published. Myself and the Bronies in the "Anything MLP" Facebook Group decided to continue with this fic until the 1000 word benchmark had been reached.

~ mB95

Comments

[the ghost]

well this will be fun

[Paint Splatter]

Wow... I think the only thing to be said is WHAT THE FK!?

[Stiggerzz]

my random meter could not handle this fic
ahh. i love dem 3, 5 word at a time stories

best. procrastination method. EVER!!!!!

1960095 i approve of this description of the story

[Mr Chiddy]

1960214 that moment when you realize that we were actually writing this over an entire month.

[Stiggerzz]

1960294
you managed to keep this going for one month?
cdn.memegenerator.net/instances/250x250/32402008.jpg

[Mr Chiddy]

1960345 we were quite on and off with it to be honest :P

[Stiggerzz]

1960354
you had to ruin it by saying it how it was didn't you
still.....you did manage to keep it alive for a month

longer than i've ever had one, most ones i start usually go
me: <insert text>
someone: <insert text>
someone else: <insert text>
sompony else: "this sucks let's stop"
me:

[Mr Chiddy]

1960369 Yeah I'm pretty much a buzzkill in all facts of life

I actually have no idea how we managed to pull this off

[Stiggerzz]

1960415
cdn.memegenerator.net/instances/400x/24217873.jpg

[the ghost]

1960468 friendship

[Stiggerzz]

1960878
could be both
because, well, friendship IS magic after all

[Time Ponies are cool]

This thing was way to much fun to make (This is Karl)

[Sparx EmberFlame]

This was funny reading!

But it didn't break my random meter You have to know me if you want randomness in it's purest form

[MoonSparkle The Vampony]

i think my random meter broke. IT'S OVER 9000!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!