Daring Rainbow: A Novel by Rainbow Dash

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Every pony seems to be writing one of these novels so I thought I'd try my hoof at one. This is the story of Daring Rainbow, the fastest flyer ever! But this is a fiction, of course, because in reality I'm the fastest flyer ever! I hope you like it!
–Rainbow Dash

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Comments ( 13 )

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Rainbow87dash

Rainbow87dash #1 · Apr 3rd, 2013 · · ·

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Bradel

Bradel #2 · Apr 3rd, 2013 · 2 · ·

Another Rainbow Dash writing story! Of course I'm there.

I'm a little conflicted about how to comment on this. I only read the first 1/3 or so before I decided to give it a thumbs up and move on to doing other things. I genuinely feel that this is very well done. You're capturing the new writer tone very well, and it's very clearly intentional. An actual new writer would be much less even in tone, and that would make the work harder to read. You're very consistent with putting this in an amateur writer voice, and I think it works very well. I definitely enjoyed it.

My one real criticism, and the reason I'm quitting out of reading early, is that I don't find it very fun to read amateurish writing, even if it's an intentional choice. There's a reason I like more polished writing better. As I said, I think you've done a great job with what you set out to do here – I'm just not really hooked by what it is you're choosing to do. When I approached the Rainbow Writing problem, I tried to tackle this by throwing her writing inside a frame story of conventional narrative that chronicled her experience of writing as well. I'm not saying that's how this should be handled, or even suggesting that my way was a particularly good way to handle it, just that I feel like Rainbow writing amateur fiction alone isn't enough to catch me up, no matter how well an author constructs her stuff. Frame stories can make things easier to handle; so can things like critical commentary on her writing. I've seen people do something like this and break it up with line edits by Twilight. Personally, I didn't think that worked too well when I saw it, but I suspect it depends a lot on the writer's capabilities and I feel like you've got a better base level of skill than the author of the line edit story I'm remembering. Another potential route for something like this might be to throw the thing inside a very simple narrative account of Rainbow's friends reading her story – it basically allows for an MST3K fic, although with the constraint that the MST3K'ers need to stay in character and not be too mean to Rainbow.

Anyway, just throwing out a few ideas for ways one might tell a pony-written story that I, personally, would find a bit more engaging. Other readers may really like what you're doing here. As I said, I think you show some very solid skill by keeping this as evenly voiced as you did, and I suspect a lot of readers will respond favorably to that. Good work, in any case!

themultiversewatcher

themultiversewatcher #3 · Apr 3rd, 2013 · 2 · ·

Soarin's policy : "F bes, acquire pie and currency."
Rainbow Dash is best author.

MemoryLane

MemoryLane #4 · Apr 3rd, 2013 · 1 · ·

That...that was so beautiful...

Arenae

Arenae #5 · Apr 3rd, 2013 · 2 · ·

2369692 thank you so much for your feedback, comments like this are the most helpful kind. Yeah, the amateurish writing style made this story fail moderation so many times. Luckily a few minor edits and resubmissions pleased the all-powerful mods.
Anyway, I also must thank you for giving me a story idea. It would be a sequel to this one, about Rainbow's friends reading and reacting to her novel. It would be really hard to make it sound good, without ripping off "Naked Singularity" and MST3K too much, and being original with the ideas and plot......welp, if anyone needs me, I'll be in bed frantically scribbling notes and erasing them like a madman.