• Published 12th Apr 2023
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The War Diaries of Countess Sweet Bun, New Lunar Republic - CountDerpy



A dramatic retelling of the 2023 Derpibooru April Fools Event, told through the eyes of a mare fighting for harmony.

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Last Bastion: Entry 173-174

“If you will not die for us, you cannot ask us to die for you.”

― Jacqueline Carey, Kushiel's Dart


The Wonderbolts made these high-speed flights look easy. Every flex I’ve felt in my wings this morning leaves me with an ache unlike any I have felt before. Basic training didn’t even feel this bad in the beginning.

At least the food the medics had bought for me was good, though I’m not as keen on mango fruit salad as some of the herbivorous thestral around are. They tend to go crazy for the stuff, but I do not see the appeal of breakfast without fresh muffins and a nice cup of herbal tea. Call me an old-fashioned mare if you’d like, book, you cannot argue with a tried and true combination. Well you can’t really argue at all to be frank.

I struggled to get out of bed against the advice of the medics, though I assured them I would take it easy and just walk for now. I prefer walking over flying, honestly. Gives me a strange comfort in being grounded, while the rush of the skies felt too wide most times. I flew enough last night to last a small lifetime anyways

I would have called it morning when I stepped out of the tent, but I could not really tell with the perpetual twilight that hangs like a fog beneath the canopy. A humid mist hung in the air from the rains, dark shapes morphing and disappearing as they moved about at a rapid clip. The Night’s Guard was the most diverse of the Royal Guard by its very nature. Thestrals, ponies of all races, creatures of all kinds who have been cursed by the dark magicks that linger in the Wilds. The strigoi, the lycans, the carnivores and the undead. They always had a place to call home under the dark side of the Moon.

The ruined town was bustling with activity. Unicorns raced to cast their enchantments, airborne and earthbound alike working to fortify the run down buildings into defensive shelters. The Cursed wandered the edges of the town, I imagine to drive away anything looking to make a quick meal of some unsuspecting patrol in the cover of the mist.

And above it all stood the castle, not unlike a small version of Canterlot Castle, had transformed overnight from the ruined state I saw on my flight into a fortress of metal and magic. A gothic monument of steel offering its shade to all of those who asked for its protection. Cannons mounted proudly along its wall in a show of force. It’s oddly beautiful in its own right, much like Luna herself. A little ragged around the edges and needing some serious TLC, but willing to take and give forces unimaginable to protect those they harbor.

The only blemish is that flag, flying high and proud from the tallest tower like a tumor. The ancient flag of the New Lunar Republic, lacking the nightmarish motifs of old in favor of a sigil of wings and stars. Equestria is truly divided among the lines of faith and loyalty once more. The offer of protection it gave, as if Luna herself were extending her wings to bear the brunt of it all, was not a comfort.

I spoke with a few of the creatures I met along my walk, gathering what information I could on the state of affairs here. It’s going to be important to know what’s coming from now on, know who I’m fighting alongside, try to get an understanding of a world I had not been a part of for a better part of a decade.

Forces of all kinds had been mobilized for this conflict. The name “Night Terrors” came up a few times, must’ve been some specialized team recently formed but they seemed to speak of them highly, however talk of the leader of the group was met with stern looks from the other guards. Never got their name, maybe I’ll meet them sometime.

The current tactic in play was to wait and fortify. A counterattack was of the greatest concern. While minimal lives were lost in the initial attack on Canterlot Castle, a full scale counter attack would be much more deadly. Especially if Flux was among the ranks leading the charge.

Finally I learned about a group of captured Solar Guard that had been taken during the escape. No one knew what the exact plan for them was, bargaining chips for the captured Night Guards back in Canterlot most likely. Maybe I can convince Celestia into negotiations for release from both sides.

That’s another thing that worries me now. Sending a letter by conventional means would risk another accusation of treason, and the creatures here would be more likely to act immediately than to let justice be served through the systems. I’ll talk with some of the artificers later, see if a Sending Stone could be acquired from their stocks. I’ll wait on that until I talk with Luna. Making my return into the ranks will keep the suspicions off me.

I can see the Lieutenant coming back towards the medical tent now, hopefully to lead me to a meeting with her. We’ll just have to see.

-Diary of Countess Sweet Bun, Entry 173. Hour 31 of the War.


I sometimes wish I had been born a unicorn, or at least added runic magic to my education at some point. Wouldn’t mind writing my thoughts down in the moment rather than waiting and trying to describe every thought in my mind that became replaced by another just as quickly, but it’s rather clunky to write by hoof while you’re trying to walk.

The interior of the Bastion is surprisingly large for the ruins it was built on. I still cannot fathom how much work they’ve done on the place in such a short time. Iron covers most of the walls, held in place by bolts half the size of any regular pony and weighing thrice as much. Enchantments flow over most of them in wisps of pale teal aether, serving to fill the hall with the same light as much as they do to add magical protection to the structure. The ceilings stood around 30 feet above me, I could vaguely see movement and the faint glow of eyes in the darkness, thousands of thestrals using the crossing support beams as resting places.

Much like in Canterlot, the main hall was flurry of activity. Soldiers carried crates of bullets, cannonballs, spell canister grenades, and other terrifying munitions. Some of which I swore were illegal, or at the very least unethical by most standards. Others were practicing with close-quarters weapons, slashing through training dummies with electrified claws and swords I could never dream of wielding without being crushed by their weight. All the hallmarks of a nation ready for whatever Celestia could throw at them. There were some things that disturbed me on a level I have never felt.

Creatures of all shapes and sizes walked the halls in floor length robes, flipping through spellbooks and mixing various ingredients at potion stations. Stuff one might assume was fairly normal, but even I could feel the energy coming from the spells they were practicing. It came off them in waves, making me break out in a cold sweat as we passed by them. My eyes locked with one of the mages and it felt like my very soul had turned to ice. Their robes were colored in a way similar to the ancient flag of the NLR, dark blues and blacks in swirling mists adorned with bright stars. Cultists, no doubt, bringing their forbidden magicks to aid the being they paid tribute too. The very one that had been destroyed by six friends long ago. Why Luna would ever allow these psychopaths into her midst baffled my mind. The Cursed I understand, they couldn’t help what they are and many do not deserve to be destroyed by those seeing them as nothing but abominations. Cultists, especially ones trying to bring about the return of everlasting night, are never anything but trouble waiting to happen.

Away from them I encountered a couple of members of the so-called Night Terrors, though I didn’t get the chance to speak with any of them. They seemed like they could be a friendly bunch outside of war, most of them anyways. I got a quick glance from their leader, a thestral who went by Dark as I later learned, and I felt the urge to flee. They didn’t seem like they were a bad creature, far from it, but there was something off about them. Ancient, primal, predatory. I felt like a gazelle staring down a hungry manticore at dinner time. Once the glance was gone, so was the feeling, though part of me still glances down the hall where they are addressing their troops as if I almost expect them to appear in front of my face in the blink of an eye.

I heard from the Lieutenant guiding me through the halls that there had been a number of defectors running from the Empire in the last few hours, and much to his dislike a many number of the Night Guard had chosen to flee or stay behind in Canterlot. Rat was a name that came up among the ones choosing to side with Celestia. I vaguely remember them, another creature as unusually skilled and driven much like the Red General, one I never got the honor of meeting in person but heard of their accomplishments. With Flux and Rat by Celestia’s side, even by themselves, maybe this war will end without too much bloodshed on sheer will alone.

Whatever the reason for this rebellion, it leaves the Night Guard with an uphill battle the way the chips are stacked.
My meeting with Luna is to start soon, the Lieutenant mentioning that she demanded my presence as soon as my name was brought up to her. I wonder if that is a good or bad thing? She cared enough about our friendship and my service to her to warn me about the initial attack on the Castle, so maybe it will be a good talk. Maybe I can finally make sense of the reasoning behind all of this, though I imagine I may be a bit miffed if it’s over something extremely petty.

Getting mad with one princess and betraying another in the span of a day? That’s got to be some kind of record.

-Diary of Countess Sweet Bun, Entry 174. Hour 32 of the War.

Comments ( 4 )

i wish i was on the NRL and not that stupid sun empire. the stupid moderators had to place me on the wrong team and losing team. and i hate losing! i dont even have a NRL badge like everyone else does.

11556373

Unity under the sisters is what we should all strive for!

(It's all good friend. We're still throwing around similar shade in the forums from time to time. It's pretty fun so no worries.)

I remember the war.

:D

11844811
Same

I actually need to get around to finishing this ^^"

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