A stain on her pride

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That One Strange Fellow

That One Strange Fellow #1 · Apr 10th, 2023 · 5 · 5 ·

I don't have much to say on the contents of the story since this is absolutely disgusting, but I did want to read it through just to comment on it. Yeah, a lot of unreasonable people downvote based on present themes (scat, watersports, foalcon, incest, even rape sometimes, etc) rather than reading the story to judge it based on its actual quality. They take one look at the content warning, get pissy about it, downvote, then leave.

That being said...

*SNIP*

Take your pick of paragraphs. They're too damn long! Break them up a little!

A tight grab on her underarm bracer by her sister, Celestia pulled her down the remaining stairs as the lunar princess tried to talk the white furred goddess out of this and over to the before-mentioned spot.

SHOW, DON'T TELL! This is a prime opportunity for dialogue!

A large brown log had started to make its way to her splinter.

I think the word you're looking for is sphincter.

Said tongue got its first taste of her sister shit and almost thru up, but there was no way Tia would let her sister off with only the tip of her shit staining her mouth.

*threw

...

I'm not too familiar with the content format, so I can't comment on the quality of the fetish pornography, but I do have some remarks. Spelling and grammar mistakes are present throughout the document (capitalization issues, junk vs chunk, other words misspelled or just wrong, etc). Maybe run this through a free spelling/grammar checker before publishing just to iron out these issues.

I've seen shittier stories out there get a lot more upvotes. I would take the actual comments more seriously than the ratio on a story like this.

Questionmark x3

Questionmark x3 #2 · Apr 10th, 2023 · · 5 ·

11553371
Thanks for the objective critic.

I did write this story in one sitting and did not intend to go very far with it to be honest.

I see thanks to your input that I have to put some more work into the next stories and would recommend some of my less "fetish" stories like the casting couch one.

I will try to put some more detail into my next project. Definitely more explaining on the scenes.

zachary12