33,860 words

65536: 15

The Nightguards land in the first calmer alley in lower Canterlot they can find.

“So, where do we begin our foodie trip?” asks Steel Glimmer.

Unfortunately for a certain one of them whose motherly instincts have been receiving a serious awakening so far, they landed just by a plaza filled to the brim with ponies watching what seems to be a light show judging by the blasts of colors swirling through the air, which means only one thing:

“EEEEE! SO MANY FLOATY SHINIES!” 65536 exclaims, bursts of various colored lights reflecting in its eyes.

“Wait-!” Gloom’s words are drowned out by the overall noise of the Summer Sun Celebration.

With one, albeit careful, bounce off of Gloom’s head, 65536 charges forward before she can react, vanishing between the legs of ponies filling the plaza.

“Craaaap!” with a curse, Sharp rushes forward, shoving ponies aside, “Official business! Clear the way, citizens, clear the way!”

“Where could Buzz be?” asks Gloom with no particular target for that question in mind.

“The shiniest thing around is the damn stage!” replies Pink Sunset, pushing through right next to her.

“That’s the last thing we need right now!” she growls.

“AND NOW, FOR THE GREAT AND POWERFUL TRIXIE’S MOST ROYAL OF PERFORMANCES - THE LUNAR ECLIPSE!” shrieks the blue mare on stage so incredibly loud that she outscreams the mob around, standing on her hind legs with her forelegs pointing at the sky, “BEHOLD!”

Something clicks in the back of the stage, quickly followed by the noise of two gears grinding together and getting stuck. The crowd goes silent and waits.

“Official business, coming through!” is the only audible thing for the next two seconds.

“B-BEHOLD!” repeats the stage magician with much less certainty. The crowd begins snickering, until they all unite in a solid:

“Booooo!”

The white-maned, blue unicorn mare on the stage looks around in sudden panic before her eyes lock on a small equine hopping up on the stage via a short set of stairs on the side.

“Where did all the shinies go?” asks 65536, looking up at the once again black sky.

“YOU, TRIXIE’S ASSISTANT! GET OVER HERE!” the stage magician calls out to 65536.

“Nooooooo...” Gloom, roughly two thirds of the way to the stage, freezes in utter disbelief.

Blue aura of magic envelops 65536, lifting the drone up as it starts giggling and waving its legs in the air.

“...buck buck buck buck...”

“DUE TO, EHM, TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES-” Trixie quickly improvises, “THE GREAT AND POWERFUL TRIXIE WILL POSTPONE HER ORIGINAL FINISHING ACT AND PLAY ON YOUR DEEPEST FEARS WHILE YOU REGRET YOUR RECENT LAUGHTER AND BOOING!”

“Booooooooo!”

“Wheeeee!” 65536 keeps floating around her.

“...buck buck buck buck...”

“WITH MAGIC SO BEYOND YOUR GRASP THAT UNICORNS AMONG YOU WILL NOT FEEL OR DETECT IT, THE GREAT AND POWERFUL TRIXIE WILL TRANSFORM HER ASSISTANT INTO THE FORM FROM YOUR WORST NIGHTMARES!” her telekinesis grips 65536’s helmet, “BEHOLD, THE FACE OF THE PUREST EVIL!” sideways, she quietly hisses at 65536, “...just growl or something and we’ll get both out with our hides intact...”

“...buck buck buck buck...”

She removes 65536’s helmet.

“...buuuuuuuuck...”

The crowd gasps.

“EVEN THE GREAT AND POWERFUL TRIXIE ISN’T SURE HOW LONG SHE CAN HOLD THE BEAST CONTAINED!”

She lets 65536 go.

Somepony in the crowd screams and faints.

The drone looks around, waves at the constantly cursing Gloom now stuck in the middle of the unresponsive crowd.

“Raaaawr!” 65536 waves its forelegs in the air with a huge smile, “I can hiss too, look! Hisssss!” it closes its eyes, hissing, “I can make more noises! RAWRGL-HISSSSSS!”

The Nightguards have no idea what to do, their blood turning to ice in their veins.

Until somepony calls out from the top of their lungs:

“WOOOO! EXCELLENT WORK! I FELT ABSOLUTELY NO MAGIC!”

The crowd turns its head to the single, tall, white, blond-maned unicorn stallion responsible for the cheering.

“AMAZING!” he starts stomping the ground.

“Me neither!” calls out a different unicorn, which is followed by more and more agreeing out loud.

Gloom’s blood flow resumes when, one by one, the ponies in the crowd join the cheering and stomping.

“MORE APPLAUSE FOR MY AMAZING ASSISTANT!” Trixie adds before jumping into the crowd that lets her crowd-surf across their backs.

“Wheeeee!” 65536 joins in, hopping over back after back towards Gloom until-

-a striped foreleg snatches it from a pony’s back and Gloom loses sight of the drone.

“...buuuuuuuuuuck...”

“WOOO, COGHT ‘NOTHR!” yells an obviously completely wasted muscular zebra mare accompanying the originator of the cheering - the unicorn currently telekinetically holding a big mug of something alcoholic, “EEEEEVL CHONGBLONG!”

The crowd around them bursts out into laughter and, to the relief of the Nightguards, starts losing interest in 65536 and talking to each other about the performance.

As for 65536, it momentarily ponders some sort of new, strange whispering at the edge of its hearing or inside its head entirely but can’t understand it no matter what. Besides, trying to force anything only leads to a minor headache, so 65536 stops focusing on the phenomenon. The drone squeaks as it gets telekinetically pulled out of the zebra’s hooves and finds itself face to face with the tall unicorn.

“Rawr!” it beams at him before sticking its tongue out, “Pplplplp! Different scary noise!”

The unicorn smirks before reaching out, patting its head, and then sliding his hoof over its back, stopping when he reaches the cardboard Nightguard back plate, and moving his foreleg lower to rub its belly between the straps of the faux armor instead.

“Are you feeling okay?” asks the unicorn once he’s done with his examination.

“NEVER BEEN BETTER!” 65536 excitedly calls out, “EVERYONE IS SUPER NICE, ESPECIALLY LUNA, NOT-BLUE, PRINCESS SUNBUTT, AND THE FLUFFY-EARED PONIES!”

“Fluffy-eared p-?”

“Official business, coming through!” rings through the crowd.

The unicorn turns his head and says:

“I see who you mean.”

Sharp Biscuit stops in front of the unicorn, his face carefully controlled and his tone flat and as official as he can muster.

“Your Highness, I-” is all he can say before the unicorn interrupts him.

“Excellent illusion for a common stage magician, wasn’t it?” Blueblood levitates 65536 onto Sharp Biscuit’s back before turning around and pulling at the ear of the zebra swaying unsteadily next to him, “Come, Zamira. We still have a lot to experience.”

Once they’re out of the plaza, Zamira stumbles into Blueblood.

“Wazzat a reel buggo or am I to- too drunksh?”

“Both. Definitely both.”

“Shud wee do… sumshin?”

“More jello shots, maybe?”

Zamira’s unfocused eyes go wide.

“SEE? DES WAI YOO MY FAVOSH BUGGOS! ALL FIVE OF OF YA!” she lunges at Blueblood’s neck, missing entirely and faceplanting into a street lamp.

***

“You complete, utter, silly, little, unbelievably lucky-”

“Evvvveryyyyyythinnnnng woooobbleeeesssss...” 65536’s eyes cross as it finds itself being held and relentlessly shaken by teared-up Gloom throwing out a stream of adjectives at it.

“How could you think that running off was a smart idea?! What were you thinking? WERE you thinking?”

“...dizzyyyyyyyyy…”

“Gloom, let the little guy breathe-”

“RAWRGL-HISS AT YOU IN A NON-ADORABLE WAY, COMMANDER!” she shoots Sharp a not entirely sane glance.

“Oooh-kay...” he backs off, “Glims, a little help?”

“Don’t look to me for disturbing somepony overdosing on mothering instincts, Commander.”

“Hunter?”

“There’s nothing more dangerous than a mare protecting her foal. Despite the obvious differences here, I’m not getting close without one of those enchanted paladin full plate armors.”

“Pink, please? Before she shakes the life out of Buzz?”

“Gloom?” Pink Sunset takes a step towards Gloom who shoots him a bloodshot glare this time.

“Grrrrrrrrr…!”

“I understand that you’re upset, but-”

“Upset? UPSET?! WE’RE IN A CITY WHERE NOT EVEN TWO WEEKS AGO IT WOULD HAVE BEEN SKEWERED BY-”

“And you screaming these things out loud and holding Buzz for everypony to see is helping how?” Sunset tilts his head, “Besides, I don’t know what they throw up but you’re halfway to finding out.”

“Hurrrrrr...” 65536 clamps its forelegs over its mouth.

“And the cupholders will just make the stream more accurate,” he adds.

“A-hem,” Gloom clears her throat with only the tiniest hint of shame, and puts 65536 down where it wobbles unsteadily around on the spot, “I may have gotten a little carried away-”

“A little-” Sharp makes a mistake.

“Shut up!” and so does Gloom, one which she realizes when met with Sharp Biscuit’s raised eyebrow, “Ehm, I mean, shut up, Commander. With all due respect, of course.”

“That’s better,” Sharp nods, “Now, how about we all calm down and agree that if Buzz here tries to run off again it will get its little hooves stapled together.”

“Ugh...” 65536 sits down to stop the world from spinning.

“Agreed!”
“Definitely!”
“Yep.”
“If it’s an order...”

“Eeeep!” 65536 freezes, getting rather nasty flashbacks to whenever it used to be scrutinized by a high rank.

This time, the high rank is extremely angry.

“Private-on-probation Buzz,” Gloom stands over 65536, “For the rest of tonight, you will not leave my sight. Understood?”

*Wibble attempt?*

“NO WIBBLING! I’M TOO FURIOUS FOR WIBBLING!”

The flashbacks get worse.

*.elbbiW*

“Do you understand?”

*Nod nod nod!*

“What do you understand?”

“NotleaveyoursightMissGloom!”

“Good. And what happens to bad privates who disobey?”

“Theydon’tgetfedortheygetrecycledorjustgointothecrusher!” 65536 is shaking now.

“Great... now I feel awful,” she sighs, sits down, and picks 65536 up, “Look, I was so terrified when you ran off into the middle of a crowd full of ponies. I don’t want you to get hurt. Got it, you little idiot?”

*Nod nod nod.*

“But you still need to be punished so the lesson sticks,” she frowns, “If you do something this stupid again, no candy for you.”

“Those burning things? Luna didn’t want me eating those anyway. They’re mushy but not stingy mushy like soap.”

“How do you know that?” asks Sharp.

“I only licked one!”

“Can-dy, not can-dle,” Gloom raises her voice, “That’s like...” she pauses, “Who do you like the most?”

“Luna!” 65536 replies immediately, “Her love is super special.”

“And do you like my- our love?”

“Yup!”

“But you like Luna’s more, right?”

“Yup!”

“So… think of candy as the better kind of love but not healthy.”

“Uhhh...”

“Different worlds, Gloom. Different worlds,” Sharp shakes his head, “I think that a practical demonstration is in order.”

“Agreed,” says Night Hunter, “But seriously, Buzz, don’t run off no matter what. If you want to try or see something, ask us and we’ll come with you. That’s what we’re here for, after all.”

“I’m sorry for making you worry,” 65536’s ears droop.

“You’re on probation and that’s the end of it. We’re not about to keep giving you Tartarus for the rest of the night,” Sharp glances Gloom’s way, “Anypony got an idea where to start with, as Glimmer called it, our foodie trip?”

“The majority of the vendors should be on Spiral Avenue,” says Glimmer, “We can clip it and then turn towards the mountainside to visit the griffon shop I talked about.”

“Sounds like a plan. Is everypony on board with that?” Sharp looks around at the nodding group, “Good. Lead the way, Glims.”

***

Spiral Avenue is, in contrast to its name, the main street of lower Canterlot, leading from the outer gates directly towards the road spiraling around the entire mountain and connecting the upper city that’s halfway up and the lower city at the mountain’s base. Currently it’s, just like the upper city, filled with vendors, food stalls, and cheaper attractions mostly designed for earth ponies and pegasi. Tourists from all over Equestria and beyond are welcome to shop around and enjoy themselves, and the crowds are much more diverse than in the upper city where the majority of them were unicorns.

“APPLES, CANDIED APPLES, APPLE PIES, APPLE FRITTERS, APPLED APPLES!” calls out one of so many voices ringing everywhere around that 65536 could almost believe it’s inside the hive again, this one slurred by a strange, drawn-out accent.

“Appled apples?” Pink Sunset looks directly at a brownish-orange mare with blond mane wearing a stetson operating a rather well-done modular mobile cart filled with, by the smell of it, apple products.

“Exactly!” somehow, the mare heard him and replies with a wide smile, “They’re apples from trees that are only watered by apple cider stored in barrels made of apple wood, all produced by the Apple family,” she presents her wares.

“Isn’t that, like, cannibalism?” Sunset snickers, getting a stink-eye from the mare in response before she smiles her professional, business smile again.

“Excellent joke, Mister Guard. Now, is there anything Ah can offer to you or...” she trails off, circling her fetlock in the air.

“A candied apple, please,” Gloom shoves Pink Sunset aside.

“One cand- is that a changeling on yet back, if ya don’t mind me asking?” she narrows her eyes.

“A stage illusionist cast a spell on my friend’s foal and it- he now looks like that. Not sure how long it’ll last,” Gloom shrugs, “Hiss at the nice mare, private Buzz, would you?”

“Hisss, woOoOoO!” 65536 waves its forelegs, “I’m totally spooookyyyy.”

The mare visibly relaxes and shoves an apple on a wooden stick into a vat of some sticky, semi-liquid mess.

“How about one of your appled apples candied in apple sauce?” snickers Pink Sunset, “You can call it apple cubed.”

“Har har,” the mare rolls her eyes and presents the candied apple to Gloom, “There ya go, ma’am. That’ll be five bits.”

Gloom presents the coins to the mare and gives the received treat to 65536 who carefully sniffs it from all sides as the Nightguards resume walking.

65536 licks it, its eyes going wide.

And finally bites down on it.

“Uh oh...” 65536 shakes its head vigorously, the apple stuck in its mouth, “Mmphmhpmh!”

“Next time try a smaller bite?”

“MMMPHHP!”

“Do you need help?” asks Sharp, walking by Gloom’s side and watching the drone’s attempts to ineffectively pull the apple out of its mouth by the stick.

“Nngh!” 65536 shakes its head.

A short burst of minty scent later, 65536 manages to bite down and swallow half of the apple in one go.

“Wooh, much better,” it pauses, “I can’t taste much of it over my venom.”

“That’s because you swallowed like a python,” replies Gloom, “Take small bites and either chew properly or suck it for a while.”

*Nom nom nom!*

“Hey! That’s delicious,” 65536 resumes looking around while nibbling on the rapidly disappearing apple.

Out of nowhere, Gloom says:

“Buzz, hop on the Commander’s back for a moment.”

The moment she feels 65536’s weight leave her back, she vanishes into the crowd. Sharp and Sunset exchange glances but Gloom returns in a few moments with a small pack from which she pulls out a green sphere and presents it to 65536.

“You want one?”

The drone sniffs it before tensing up and scowling.

“Oookay,” Gloom shrugs, “I guess sour candy isn’t everypony’s thing,” she raises her hoof to put the green candy into her mouth.

“Noooooo!” 65536 suddenly reaches out from Sharp’s back, attempting and failing to swat it out of Gloom’s hoof, “That’s melty muncher spit! You can’t-” 65536 pauses when Gloom’s mouth fails to dissolve amidst terrifying screaming and gurgling, “What? Why aren’t you screaming and exploding? Are you ponies melt-proof?” it tilts its head with visible suspicion.

Gloom just offers the drone the bag again.

“It’s just sour candy, it’s not acid. Look,” she pops another soft candy into her mouth.

“Technically-”

“I swear to Luna, Hunter, if you finish that thought I’ll bucki-” she glares not daggers but a single griffon two-hander Night Hunter’s way before realizing 65536 is around and swallowing the curse, “be extremely unpleasant to you for the next few weeks.”

65536 looks at Sharp who simply nods.

“She’s not acid-proof, buddy. Try it.”

The drone narrows its eyes, pulling out a piece of candy from the bag, sniffing it from all sides, and giving it a lick.

“AAAH! MY TONGUE IS MELT-nngh” it sticks its tongue out and crosses its eyes to examine it. The strange sensation vanishes quickly and 65536’s tongue flicking in the air remains undissolved, “Whuh?”

“Told you,” Sharp smirks.

Finally gathering courage, 65536 pops the candy into its mouth.

“EEEE! MY WHOLE MOUTH FIZZLES!”

“Want another?” Gloom wiggles her eyebrows.

“YESYESYESYESYESFIZZLERSARETHEBEST!” it snatches the bag from Gloom’s hooves.

“Don’t shove it all into your- too late,” she sighs as 65536 starts foaming, its tongue repeatedly lapping the sizzling drool dripping from its mouth.

“Are you okay?”

“Blrblrblrblrbrlllblbrl!” 65536 nods.

“Welp,” Gloom shrugs as bubbles start coming out of the drone’s nose too and it starts sneezing, “I guess we can go look for something else to try out.”

“Blllrbllrlllr- achoo! Blrlrlblr!”

“I’ll take that as a yes.”

With twitching 65536 riding on Sharp’s back, Gloom takes the lead, looking at more potentially interesting kinds of candy to taste.

Several minutes later, 65536 finally stops foaming and sneezing. After a moment of gasping for breath and recovery, it points to a stall ahead:

“That pony is making pink clouds!”

“Ah, a cotton candy machine,” Sharp identifies 65536’s target, “Not exactly my thing but let’s check it out.”

As they’re waiting in queue, 65536 can’t help but be mesmerized by the pink fluff swirling around and around in the closest of the three vats on the big machine/vendor’s stall’s counter.

It stares and stares and stares.

And sways, sways, sways, and keels over.

“Oh shi-” Sharp turns around as the weight from his back slips away.

“BLRLBRLBRLB-IT’S LIKE CANDY AND THE SPINNER THINGY AT THE SAME TIME-BLRLBRLB!”

By the time the terrified stall owner, assisted by Sharp, pulls 65536’s head out of the vat, it’s completely covered by a cloud of pink fluff.

Two blobs in the front of the pink ball move up, revealing 65536’s teal eyes.

*NOM!*

A chunk of the cotton candy gets sucked into its mouth, revealing an excited grin.

“THAT WAS FUN! CAN I GO AGAIN?”

“Whatever else happens tonight, I’m going to die a happy mare,” whispers Gloom, jingling a pouch of gold on a string in front of 65536, “This is our budget. Buy anything you want.”

Night Hunter, standing behind Gloom, asks:

“Are you sure? You could rent an apartment down here for that much-”

Strangely enough, the heavily muscular stallion finds himself in an irresistible one-foreleg lock, his nose scrunched against Gloom’s.

“Don’t. Take. This. From. Me!” she hisses before shoving him away. Turning back to 65536 currently busy ripping chunks out of the cotton candy covering its head and loading it into its mouth on an industrial level, she adds, “So, what do you want to eat next?”

“Mhmmmhh!”

“Don’t worry. Just point,” she smiles.

“Mhmmyaaaaaaaymhm!”

And so, the changeling hive is finally victorious, devouring everything in Canterlot.

Well, the one hive representative currently present.

And everything candy-related on Spiral Avenue.

Details. Details.

***

The next hour finds the group sitting inside the griffon bistro recommended by Steel Glimmer. The owner brings them a bowl of mixed dried jerky from which Glimmer immediately grabs a piece and starts chewing.

Night Hunter picks a piece as well, sniffing it and coughing.

“Whoah! I’m gonna need something stronger to wash this off with,” he looks at the griffon, “Got any Stalliongrad vodka?”

“Nope, only our stuff,” he shakes his head, “Since you’re new here, I’d recommend Drachenberg Distilled. It packs a punch despite being surprisingly low on alcohol.”

“Sounds good.” Hunter nods and the griffon walks off, quickly returning with a plate containing five glasses and putting one down for each of the Nightguards.

“Anything for the colt?” he asks, giving a look to 65536 sitting between Gloom and Night Hunter and sniffing a strip of beef jerky.

“Hmmm...” Gloom examines the menu inside a stand at the center of the round table.

65536 shoves the strip into its mouth and chews for a few seconds.

“EEEP?!” its eyes bulge, and by now the Nightguards are familiar enough with the drone’s reactions to know it’s not the usual excitement.

“What’s-?!” asks Gloom.

65536 grabs Night Hunter’s big glass of griffon vodka and downs it in one go.

“Pheeeeew! That tasted like fire!” it breathes out. Faced with shocked stares of everyone around, the drone scratches its head nervously, “Why is everyone looking at me? Did I do something?”

“Are you feeling alright?” asks Gloom.

“My mouth burns a bit but yeah. I’m not sure I want that chewy stuff, though,” it looks at the griffon owner, “Sorry.”

“Note to self,” comments Sharp, “No drinking contests with the recruit.”

“Welp, another glass, if you will,” Night Hunter breaks the stunned silence.

“Got anything sweet to drink?” asks Gloom.

“Traditional Griffonstone mead, Miss,” he says, “We even have a non-alcoholic version.”

“A tankard of that then, if we’re going full traditional.”

“Sure thing,” the griffon trots off again.

After starting off with the jerky and several drinks, the Nightguards finally enjoy a full meal while 65536 nurses its mead. Surprisingly, 65536 is mostly quiet, listening to the casual chatting of everyone about their lives, the incoming shift schedule, and the overall situation regarding Canterlot.

Eventually it’s time to leave, and the group does exactly that.

“So, how was it?” asks Steel Glimmer.

“Gotta admit it wasn’t half bad,” Hunter nods appreciatively, “A bit of an acquired taste, definitely, but I might make this a regular thing.”

The overall agreement is interrupted by a loud growl from 65536, namely its belly.

“Is everything okay?” asks Gloom.

“Hmmm,” 65536 cranes its neck to frown at its belly, “I’m not sure,” more growling and gurgling, “Ah!” it looks around and disappears behind a trash can for a moment.

The group hears-

“Hurk-blargh!”

-before 65536 returns, saying:

“All good now!”

“I’m starting to think that this guy could digest concrete,” Pink Sunset snickers.

“What’s that?” 65536 looks up at him, “A new kind of candy?”

“Building material.”

“You build stuff out of candy?!”

“No-”

“That’s just like us!”

“Uhh, what?”

“Yeah! We make love-infused goop and reinforce cracks with it. We can even make it glow and stuff!”

Quiet hissing from behind the trash cans immediately stops the conversation as the Nightguards go to examine as a group, finding a blob of pink goop sizzling and sputtering while slowly sinking into the ground…

...through solid flagstones.

Sharp pushes the trash can over the hole.

“I think we’re overstaying our welcome,” he says after whistling innocently.

“You’re truly a moral compass for us all, Commander!” Glimmer salutes.

***

Returning back on Spiral Avenue, Gloom stops by a seemingly random stall and presents 65536 with a strange, slippery bag.

65536 experimentally nibbles on it without any result.

“Bleh, tastes weird. What is this, a pillow? It’s pretty soft.”

“My mistake,” she takes it back and rips off the top of the bag separated by a line of perforation, “The candy is inside.”

Presented with a now open bag, 65536 reaches inside and pulls out a solitary small, white, extremely soft cylinder.

Step two.

*Nom!*

65536 chews.

Its jaw drops.

“THIS IS THE BEST THING EVER!” it blurts out, spitting the half-chewed up candy accidentally out past Gloom reflexively leaning to the side.

“Those are marshmallows.”

65536, sitting on Sharp’s back, holding the small bag with its hind legs and reaching inside with both forelegs, shovels two hooffuls into its mouth.

“Shmellows!”

“No, marshmallows,” Gloom corrects it.

65536 shoves the remaining contents of the bag into its mouth in one swoop, quickly chews everything up, and gulps down.

“More shmellows!” it cheers.

As instructed, Gloom rushes off, accompanied by snickering from Sunset and Sharp. This time, however, she returns with the same style of a strange bag, although one bearing ‘FAMILY SIZE!’ print in colorful letters.

65536 immediately rips into it like a buzzsaw into soft wood.

“So, I’m guessing these are a success,” comments Gloom with a smile.

*Nom nom nom nom!*

“WITHOUT THE CARAPACE, IT’S LIKE EATING HUGS AND CUDDLES!”

*Nom nom nom nom!*

Ponies, attracted by 65536 yelling, begin converging towards the marshmallow vendor, much to the unease of the Nightguards. Thankfully, nopony seems to be paying much attention to the actual identity of the yelling “foal”.

“I want a bag!”
“Same here!”
“Two bags, please!”
“If that foal loves it so much, I need three! Village-sized!”

Suddenly completely swarmed by business, the vendor calls out over the other voices:

“Miss, Miss, Miss guardspony!”

“Yes?” Gloom walks over and gets a family-size bag for free.

“Thanks for this!” is all the vendor can say before Gloom gets pushed away by a growing crowd of ponies surrounding the stall.

With a shrug, she returns to the others.

On Sharp’s back and holding a freshly open bag that’s close to half of the drone’s own size with its hind legs again, 65536 extends its forelegs towards Gloom’s bag.

“No!” Gloom pulls it away from 65536’s legs.

*NUCLEAR WIBBLE!*

“You haven’t even finished the first bag!” objects Gloom. A critical mistake.

65536 grabs the bottom of its bag, puts the open side to its mouth, unhinges its jaw, and simply shoves with its forelegs as hard as it can. Its cheeks and throat bulge.

“MHHHMHO HOOOWEMHMHM!”

“Whatever that was supposed to mean, no,” Gloom leans away in a mix of amazement and disgust.

65536 tries to wibble again, but the gesture fails completely since it can’t close its mouth due to the incredible mass of ‘shmellows’.

With the constant fidgeting accompanied by the sounds of someone apparently trying to chew up a particularly lively slinky, Sharp leisurely follows Gloom through the streets until they reach a smaller plaza filled with dance music.

*Dunn dunn dunn dunn!*

“Huh, an outside rave,” Steel Glimmer is the first one to identify the occasion.

*Dun dun dun!*

*Nom nom nom!* 65536 begins chewing in rhythm with the music.

*Dududududu!* the drumbeat quickens.

*Nomnomnomnomnom- HAAAAAH!*

65536 gasps for breath as it finally manages to chew through the fluffy mass in its mouth, successfully depositing everything into its now visibly bloated belly.

“Hey, those ponies are sniffing sugar through their noses!” it points in the direction of several mares, “I didn’t know that was a thing. Can we get some?”

“Sugar through-?” Gloom freezes, “Noooope! Nope nope nope nope! We’re leaving. NOW!”

“Should I go sort it out?” Night Hunter glances Sharp’s way.

“Can’t we let it slide just for tonight?” Steel Glimmer chimes in.

Sharp looks around before shrugging.

“We’re off duty. Let them have their fun. If we find an active patrol, we can mention it to them.”

He feels a hoof on his backside as Gloom begins pushing him away from the rave.

65536’s stomach RUMBLES.

“That didn’t sound good-” she looks up at the drone clutching its belly.

“BURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRP!”

“Sweet stars above!” Sharp clamps a hoof over his nose as a visible cloud of strange, semi-sweet scent rolls over his head.

Steel Glimmer nudges 65536, offering it a mint chewing gum.

“You know what? Take three, just in case.”

*Nom nom nom*

*Gulp!*

“You weren’t supposed to eat those...” Glimmer facehoofs, earning a second smack to the back of her head from Gloom.

“And how was it supposed to know?”

“H-eep?!” 65536 freezes, “What was th-eep??!”

“Eeeeeeeee!” Gloom clops her hooves together, “Even the hiccups are adorable!”

*Heep?!*

The confused and visibly distraught drone keeps looking around.

*Heep?!*

“Sorry,” Steel Glimmer reaches out towards 65536 before freezing and stating flatly, “No, nope. I refuse. This is too adorable to be real...”

*Heep?!*

A heart-shaped bubble made of chewing gum and whatever mess 65536’s stomach concocted slowly floats through the air.

*Heep?!*

Another one, prompting a confused look from the drone itself.

*Heep?!*

More and more.

“IT’S SO CUTE I’M GONNA DIE!” Gloom grabs Sharp by his shoulders and begins shaking him which, of course, makes the situation so much worse for 65536 on his back.