65536: 5
“You know, Luna… you could use a shower,” Sharp Biscuit smirks as he sniffs the heavy and stale air of the princess’ suite. Then he wipes his forehead, “Huh, and so could I.”
Luna looks behind herself at the sheets drenched with fresh sweat from the nightmare they’ve just escaped and takes a long breath before sticking her tongue out, “Bleh… you’re absolutely right. It’s not just us, though,” she glances at the drone sleeping on its back and firmly biting down on plush Celestia’s foreleg.
“How did you not notice it earlier?”
“There were more pressing matters at hoof!” Luna huffs indignantly, “Now shoo! And tell the serva- no,” she stops herself. Revealing a live changeling to castle staff would be a terrible idea, no doubt, “Hmph, it seems that I have to ask for a favor-”
“I’ll get the fresh sheets, don’t worry,” Sharp smiles, sniffs the air, and winces, “Possibly some air-freshener, and...” he looks at the changeling, “You know, that buggo could use a bath too.”
The changeling suddenly sits upright, looking around in visible panic and hugging Not-Blue. When its eyes stop on Luna, Sharp, and nothing else in the room, it visibly relaxes and breathes out.
“Thanks, Sharp.”
The Nightguard commander turns around.
“Shaaa!” 65536 gives him a wave, finally letting go of the now irreparably ruined plushie.
He waves back and leaves.
Luna wrinkles her nose. Now that Sharp pointed it out, she can’t get the assault of stench on her nostrils out of her mind. Come to think of it, the part of her bed where the changeling was sleeping is a crusty mess of caked dust, lint, green goo, and chitin shards.
“Ewww. You stay there,” she pats 65536’s head and points at its spot. The changeling puffs out its chest and remains solid as a rock.
Luna wipes her hoof on the sheet, rushes to the window, and opens it wide while shoving her head outside and taking in the sweet lungfuls of fresh air. The warm late summer night wind does wonders to wash away the uneasiness of the recent nightmare, and Luna soon hatches a plan for the few remaining hours of this horrible night.
With 65536 still sitting in its spot, Luna leaves the window open, walks over to the bathroom where she proceeds to draw a bath. She desperately wants to take a shower but doing so would be pointless before cleaning the ball of smelly mess that’s 65536. Splashing some cold water in her face, though, is definitely a step number one.
Sharp returns soon with a load of fresh, clean laundry, and unloads the messy stuff on Luna’s bed onto the two guards always standing outside of the suite.
“Anything else?” he asks.
“I need you to stay here. I’ve got an idea but I’m going to need you. First, though, it’s bath time.”
“Oh my, you require such personal services from me?” Sharp smirks.
Luna rolls her eyes, her horn lights up, and her telekinetic grip levitates up the changeling whom she shoves directly on Sharp’s back.
“There you go, trash collector.”
65536 hugs the back of Sharp’s neck.
“Does this go into paper, plastic, or glass?” he asks, unfazed.
“Bathtub,” she nods towards the bathroom and follows him there.
The bath is full by now, foam and bubbles casually floating above the water surface.
Sharp furrows his brows.
“You know, this might not be the best-”
“In you go, you disgusting little ball,” Luna telekinetically plucks 65536 off of Sharp’s back and tosses it into the tub.
“HISS- BLUBLUBLUBLUULBUBBLBLBLBL!”
***
“So, Luna, what have we learned?” asks Sharp bleeding from his neck with clumps of his coat missing.
“Don’t throw a changeling half the size of a normal pony into a walk-in tub big enough to fit an alicorn filled to the brim with water?”
“That,” he nods, “and also don’t send your personal bodyguard to physically fish it out when you can levitate things.”
“Sorry, I panicked,” says Luna sheepishly, “Also, it’s a lot more difficult to grab something that doesn’t want to be grabbed.”
“Alicorn...”
“I said more difficult, not too difficult,” Luna looks upwards where 65536 is hanging upside down, its hooves glued to the ceiling, It catches Luna’s eyes and-
“...hissssss!”
Sharp grumbles something to himself and swabs the bleeding spots with a freshly disinfected piece of cloth.
“Also that the holes in their legs make it really difficult to swim,” she adds.
“If I catch some yet unidentified infection, I want you to know that I might add a sun-based decoration to my official armor.”
“Don’t say things you might not be able to take back!” Luna gasps.
“Filling my application to join the paladins the first thing tomorrow.”
“TRAITOR!” Luna splashes some water from the tub at him.
“Ewww,” Sharp winces, “It was in there for just a few seconds and now the water is rancid. How about you draw a fresh bath and lure it back down while I get the bleach and wire scrubber from the kitchens? Perhaps an amount in which it can comfortably stand.”
He leaves again.
“Alright, you little disaster, get down from there.”
“HISSSS!”
Luna sighs, lets the bath drain, and starts scrubbing.
***
65536’s head has been feeling progressively heavier and heavier for the past few minutes as it watches Luna scrub the artificial pool she tried to drown it in before. Thankfully, Sharp pulled it out and wasn’t even too angry about the panicked bites, scratches, and bruises 65536 left all over him.
It carefully buzzes its wings, twists itself to lick and dissolve the goo bonds keeping its hooves glued to the ceiling, and fights a bout of dizziness after it spins in the air to be the right way up.
It realizes its mistake as the nefarious blue shimmer of Luna’s telekinesis wraps around it again. Flailing its legs ineffectively in the air, it tries to kick itself off of the water surface and hits the hard porcelain bottom.
“Stop!” Luna makes it face her. 65536 doesn’t understand her but her angry face makes its ears splay back. Her expression softens as the changeling tries to make itself look as small as possible and she slowly lowers the now limp drone down right to the water level.
And lower, and lower.
65536’s legs touch the bottom, it opens its eyes, and realizes the water is only fetlock-high and that Luna stopped more water from coming in from a silver pipe-thingy coming out of the wall.
It takes a hesitant step, slips, and flops on its belly.
The unusually warm water is still reaching barely to its muzzle. It smells weird too, not bad but weird. Kinda… kinda like Luna, in fact.
“What’s taking Sharp so long?” mutters Luna, eager to get going because she’s not sure how long the changeling is going to stay still.
65536 submerges its foreleg into the shallow water, raises it, and watches it drain out of its leg holes.
It tickles.
Concluding that this requires more testing, 65536 reaches for the water pipe thingy and starts prodding its many moving parts.
***
“Eeeeeeeeeeee!”
With a bucket of cleaning products in his mouth, Sharp peeks into the bathroom, confused by the quiet yet high-pitched mix of buzzing and screeching making his bat ears twitch.
“What went wrong n- huuuuh?”
“It’s been doing that for the past five minutes,” Luna shrugs, “Since it figured out how the shower works.”
The changeling is sitting under a stream of water, forelegs and its strange hole-y wings spread, and its eyes open wide, seemingly not minding the stream of water whatsoever.
“Well, at least it’s doing most of the cleaning work for us.”
“It still didn’t figure out how to make the water warm, so get in and start scrubbing while I fix the abomination that’s my bed,” Luna flashes Sharp a smile which makes him roll his eyes and walk into the bathtub which is in reality more a small pool.
“Shaaa- blublblblbblblb!” 65536 opens its mouth to greet the batpony and immediately starts coughing out water. During its fit, Sharp turns the shower off and looks down at the murky grey pool he’s sitting in.
Once the changeling stops choking, it longingly looks up at the shower nozzle again. Sharp turns it on again but this time it’s not lukewarm but hot in order to get rid of the mess caked on the changeling’s carapace. Wisely, he opts against the bottle of bleach in his bucket, grabs the liquid soap and a sponge, and gets to work.
It’s slow but works well, at least until he gets to the changeling’s leg holes.
“Eeeeee!”
It goes quiet when Sharp stops pushing the sponge through, looking at him with a wide smile. He moves onto the next hole.
“Eeeeeeee!”
“It certainly doesn’t seem like you hate it,” he comments, earning a quizzical look quickly replaced by more buzz-screeching.
Contrary to his own experience, the reports Sharp heard from the Nightguards, and the nightmare he visited, this changeling is far from the sawtoothed feral beast. In fact, it’s more like a… foal?
Sharp soaps up the sponge and the changeling’s leg hole again, and asks:
“Wanna see something?”
“Bzzzzt?”
He grabs its leg and blows into the hole, releasing a stream of soap bubbles.
65536’s jaw drops and its eyes go saucer-wide.
***
Shiver runs down Luna’s spine as the buzzing suddenly goes drastically louder. Expecting another mishap, she bolts into the bathroom.
“MWAHAHAHAAAAA! Revenge is mine,” laughs Sharp, aiming soaped-up 65536 at her, “FIRE IN THE HOLE, BUGGO!”
The changeling raises its forelegs, blows, and Luna’s world drowns in bubbles.
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This series has been most interesting, fun, and all in all enjoyable! I would hope you make the front page, as this has been nice to read!
10649603
I'm just kinda filling up my world's main storyline holes between Chrysalis' disappearance after Riverside events, Blazing's trip with her through the Everfree, Boss' wipeout of the hive mind, and eventually Sharp saving Chrysalis from mirror Sombra's army. Which section of the timeline this is going to cover I'm still not sure about.
Now, trying to do that WITHOUT the reader needing to know any of the other events is the challenge. Or maybe in my case making it happy and fun is the real effort.
Been featured once, and I'm not expecting it to be again, but I'm glad at least some people are enjoying it. Thanks for reading so far.
Not to bothered about plot when the chapters this cute!
This fic is ..well, GREAT!
“MWAHAHAHAAAAA! Revenge is mine,” laughs Sharp, aiming soaped-up 65536 at her, “FIRE IN THE HOLE, BUGGO!”
The changeling raises its forelegs, blows, and Luna’s world drowns in bubbles.
Simply adorable
10672138
I'm trying my best to balance the lore/plot parts with some sort of cuteness. Hopefully it'll work in the long term.
MWAHAHHAAHA THWAS ABSOLUTAMENTE MAGNIFICENT!!!!
Changeling drones nay be absolutely adorable, but it appears that they’re also a handful.
10871858
They mean well and that's the important thing in the end.
10871858
Reminds me of the story were Ponyville is invaded by small changelings with the personalities of cats/dogs, as long as they got cuddles and scritches they where adorable and useful. I imagine the drones in this story are similar when you get into the really big numbers. Though maybe they are just mentally children when not connected to the hive mind.
10934203
What is that fic called
These are the best changelings
Gunner, Identify, Alicorn, traverse right, five meters, bubble!