Ponyville Diaries

by Sylpheed Dashstep

Discovery

“Daaaaaaash,” I groaned, standing on a large stump, sweating my ass off despite the surprisingly cool breeze blowing through the ravine. “How much longer are we going to be going? I’m dying over here.”

Dash looked back over her shoulder, standing at the top of a hump in the path. She gave a small huff, “Are all unicorns this unathletic? Twilight gets a pass, she’s the biggest bookworm I know, and I guess I’ll give Rarity a pass too, but I don’t think I’ve seen a unicorn doing any form of exercise before.”

“Hey, I’ll have you know I worked at Applejack’s farm until about a month ago,” I huffed out, struggling to catch my breath.

Dash gave me a smirk over her shoulder, “Yeah, and? You don’t get this athletic just by working on a farm for a couple months.”

I took a moment to look her over, admiring the sheen of sweat on her muscles. The slight flare of her wings drew my eyes next as they tried to keep her from overheating, while also showing off her feathers in a way that drew my eyes to her breast, heaving slightly from exertion. She flipped her mane, drawing my eyes to hers and I gave her a smile as I said, “Yeah yeah, whatever you say Ms. Future Wonderbolt. We can’t all have such high aspirations as you.” I stepped off the stump I had been resting on, making my way up the hump, bumping Dash with my hip as said, “And besides, it’s not like I have any ambitions to leave Ponyville just yet.”

Dash got quiet for a moment after that, turning to look over the horizon, the setting sun turning the sky a deep red. She finally spoke, sounding somber, “Hey A, what happens if you get your memory back?”

I turned my eyes to the horizon as well, the trickle of the river a few hoof steps away being the only sound between the two of us. I was stuck thinking, wondering just what I would do if I ever got my memory back, but unsure of what I could say. “I can’t say Dash, I suppose if I got my memory back I’d love to go find my old life.” I saw her ears lower a little out of the corner of my eye, and I couldn’t help but feel a small flutter in my chest. “But,” I added, “I don’t think that I could leave Ponyville. You girls have been so good to me, and I feel like I’ve really made a life here in Ponyville, I don’t know how I could ever leave it. Especially not you.” I felt my cheeks heat up slightly as I said those words, but a small part of my mind whispered faintly. There was no timberwolf. I felt like a cold bucket of water had been dumped on me and my mood soured almost immediately. “Let’s get going,” I said, stepping forward down the path. “And you still haven’t told me where we’re heading to.”

Dash seemed stunned for a moment, muttering to herself under her breath and I could imagine her rolling her eyes behind me, putting a small smile on my face despite my mood. She took the lead in front of me, brashly exclaiming, “Well if I just told you then it wouldn’t be a surprise. You’ll see when we get there.”

We were mostly quiet for the next hour of walking, just the heavy breathing as we both followed the path in silence. I used a spell to help light the way once the sun had fully set and soon enough the hill rose and the trees broke away, revealing a clear view of the night sky, the moon barely peeking over the horizon and beginning to give a fair bit of light. I took a step forward and Dash held out a wing, stopping me and causing me to notice that we were at the edge of a sheer cliff.

I turned to her, opening my mouth to ask a question, but she cut me off, “I know you like to look at stars and I heard Twilight complaining about how light Ponyville can get sometimes, and with Canterlot in the way as well I imagine it gets kind of hard to see them sometimes.”

I was quiet for a moment, looking up, my eyes tracing the constellations that I had come to learn over the last few months. I turned to Dash and met eyes with her, a small smile on my face as I said, “Hey Dash…”

“Yeah, what’s up A,” she said softly, so quiet, as if she was scared.

“I don’t have my telescope,” I said bluntly, holding back a laugh and watching as her nose scrunched up.

She was silent for a moment, looking like she couldn’t make up her mind if she wanted to yell at me or if she wanted to laugh with me. And then her lips were on mine, drawing a surprised yelp from me as she leaned into me, fast and aggressive. I lost my balance a bit and I tripped back, falling onto my rear with Dash following me, leaning farther into the kiss before she had to adjust, pulling back with a small flap of her wings to help stabilize herself. I blinked, unsure of what had just happened. I met eyes with Dash again and her face gave away the worry and the fear in her eyes, scared of how I would react. And how was I going to react? My brain felt scrambled, thoughts flying left and right, each of them trying to find a place, but none of them able to find any grip except for one.

“There was no timberwolf.”

Her face paled and the worry in her eyes turned to pure fear. “W-w-what do you mean?”

I sat solemn for a moment, my mind pushing out the moment that had just happened and focusing on the statement I had just made. There was no timberwolf. I was so sure of that but I had been so worried about confronting her about it and I had finally done it. It felt awful, but I had already started this, and I couldn’t back out now if I wanted to get any answers.

“Dash, I know,” I pressed, taking a small step forward, almost pleading with her as I spoke. “Please, I know that there was no timberwolf. I don’t know why you lied about it but I need you to tell me. I just want to know.”

She was quiet, looking away, trying to gather her thoughts together. “I...I don’t know what you’re talking about Astra. I saved you from a timberwolf, and I brought you to Twilight,” her voice took on a hard tone, as if she was trying to convince me simply through conviction. But I knew, and I wasn’t going to let go that easy, I needed answers.

I took another step forward, rising off my haunches and almost getting in Dash’s face, “Look, Dash. I went to the woods. I found the spot. There was no magic there. There was no timberwolf. There never was.” I leaned even farther forward, my nose almost touching hers. “Why are you lying to me, Rainbow Dash?”

I felt my head snap to the right and I felt a pain fill my jaw, a groan leaving my lips, and something warm filling my mouth before I spit, seeing a dark liquid splash on the ground, glistening in the moonlight. I looked up at Rainbow Dash, finding her standing there, one hoof hanging in the air, a shocked look on her face. I took a step back, followed by another after a moment, and before I knew it I had turned and I was walking, the blood rushing in my ears and my jaw aching, occasionally having to spit the blood from my mouth. I heard hoof steps behind me and I turned, catching her following a few steps behind me.

“Stop following me,” I growled.

“I have to go back to Ponyville too you know,” she said, not meeting my gaze.

“Then fly, I want to be alone right now,” I said, continuing forward.

“A, I’m sorry,” she shouted after me, causing me to pause and turn.

“For punching me, or for lying to me?”

She was silent, and I turned away for the last time. I arrived back into town, making the lonely trek to my house, only one or two ponies out this late at night. The door closed behind me and I flicked the light on, looking at the mess on the floor, sighing to myself and picking my way into the kitchen. I made my way to the cabinet above the fridge, opening it and using my magic to reach the top shelf at the back, pulling out a bottle of Sweet Apple Acres Hard Cider. The amber liquid sloshed around and I felt the pain in my chest swell for a moment, causing my eyes to water and I had to sniff, forcing the emotions down.

“Thanks for the housewarming gift Applejack,” I muttered to myself, pulling the top off and taking a hard swig straight from the bottle.

---

It had been two months since the visit to Luna, and Twilight hadn’t been able to get any form of a response from her. She had asked Princess Celestia about it but was told that Luna had a lot of work and unfortunately couldn’t respond. I didn’t believe her, but I couldn’t tell Twilight that. I didn’t know what to tell her anyway, that there was something about Luna? That wouldn’t do anything, especially because if she pressed, I wouldn’t even be able to tell her what it was that I was so intent on because not even I could figure out what I wanted to confront Luna about. Anytime I thought back to that moment, frozen in time, the two of us just staring at each other. The look in her eyes and on her face, betraying something major that she was so...afraid of. And then there was the mansion that we saw, that I could almost desperately feel myself drawn towards, but I couldn’t force myself to go back. How would I explain being there? Hey there, I just had a really weird moment looking at the gate to your mansion, could I just come in and look around real quick? I couldn’t see that going very well.

Rarity spoke, breaking me out of my thoughts, and I had to glance up, unsure of what she had just said to me. “I’m sorry, what was that,” I asked, trying to politely tell her that I wasn’t listening to the conversation.

She gave a sharp click of her tongue and leveled her gaze at me, clearly slightly frustrated, “I asked if you had seen this new pony moving to town. Are you alright Astra? You’ve been very out of it lately. Have you been working too hard again? I know that you work for the Princesses but that shouldn’t force you to work too much.”

I gave a small huff, “I’m fine Rarity, I’ve just got a lot on my mind. And I’ve told you before, I don’t work for the Princesses, they just subsidize the research that I do.”

Rarity waved a hoof at me, sounding slightly haughty as she spoke, “Yes, yes darling, of course, but it sounds so much better if you get introduced as working for the Princesses.”

I rolled my eyes, scoffing, “And no, I haven’t met her yet. I did see her stuff getting moved in though, saw a lot of books, and some telescopes.”

“Oh great, another egghead,” I heard over my shoulder, turning and catching sight of Rainbow Dash.

“Rainbow Dash,” Rarity exclaimed, feigning a swoon. “How brutish!”

She waved a hoof, “Yeah yeah, whatever.”

It was the first time I’d been this close to Rainbow Dash in the last two months, and the sight of her put a small pain in my chest. I elected not to push the issue, leaving the comment hanging, and turning back to the front door of Sugarcube Corner just as Pinkie rushed in the door.

“EVERYPONY DOWN, SHE’S COMING,” Pinkie shouted, causing me to cringe a little at the volume she reached.

“Well if she didn’t know about the party before she definitely knows now,” I heard Rainbow Dash mutter from behind me.

The lights cut out and everypony got quiet, waiting in anticipation for the door to open. The door slowly opened and a pony slowly stepped in, her frame being lit by the light coming in through the door, obscuring her features. She took a step in, letting out a quiet, “H-hello?”

The lights kicked on and we all gave out a hearty, “WELCOME TO PONYVILLE!” I trailed off in the middle of mine, the lack of a voice not noticed in the crowd. I recognized the mare, but I couldn’t figure out where I’d seen her, and it took a few moments of studying her for it to click. The white coat, the black mane, and the light green eyes, it all clicked and I found myself remembering my trip to Canterlot, right before we had left. The door had opened and I met her eyes, feelings dredging themselves up that I had been too tired to try and figure out. But now I wasn’t exhausted, and all of those feelings came rushing back, making me very aware that she was staring wide eyed at me. The mess of feelings slowly untangled and I felt panic rise to the top, and I began to hyperventilate until Pinkie appeared, breaking our line of sight as she spoke to the mare. I quietly ducked to the back of the group, looking to get away from her. I made my way into the empty kitchen, spotting a door leading outside that I quickly made my way towards.

“Are you okay,” a voice asked, causing me to freeze. I turned, locking eyes with Rainbow Dash. I felt short of breath and I opened my mouth to speak, struggling to gather enough breath to answer but she took one look at me and moved over, wrapping a wing around my side, pulling me to her barrel and opening the door. We found ourselves in the alley behind Sugarcube Corner and she led me a couple steps farther down, finding a chair sitting against the wall that she helped me sit down in. “Hey, look at me,” she said, lifting my chin and locking eyes with me. “You’re okay, A.”

I searched her eyes, feeling myself get lost in the deep magenta, and my breathing slowly returned to normal, my heart rate slowing back to a normal pace. I still felt shaky but I leaned forward, pressing my forehead against hers, just breathing slowly. Dash was silent, giving me time to collect myself and eventually I leaned back.

“Thank you,” I said softly. Dash didn’t respond, just sitting there silently, letting me get back to normal. “How’d you...know what to do,” I asked, still quiet, almost afraid of setting myself off again.

“Being the coolest all the time isn’t that easy, turns out,” was all she said, standing up and taking a few steps down the alley, stopping in front of the door to the bakery. “Can we...talk? Later. There’s something I need to tell you.”

She hadn’t looked back at me so I couldn’t see her face but I could almost hear the tremble of fear in her voice as she spoke. I opened my mouth, trying to speak but not able to find my voice until I cleared my throat, replying softly, “Yeah...I’d like that.”

She nodded and walked back into the bakery, leaving me alone in the alley, a small smile gracing my face. I took my time in the alley, just sitting there collecting my thoughts as I let my eyes slowly wander. A mirror caught my eye and I turned to gaze at myself, taking stock of the orange fur, the grey eyes, and the green fur. Different again. I stood up and made my way back into the bakery once I’d recovered from the panic attack. The party was in full swing, with Pinkie having turned the music on and already dragging the mare to the dance floor. From where I was standing I could see her cutie mark, a crescent moon, with two shooting stars passing through the crest. I felt that tangle of feelings dredging themselves up again but I pushed them down, forcing myself to ignore them for now. I took a few steps towards her, stopping abruptly as Pinkie sidled up to me.

“Heya Astra! Where have you been,” she asked, bumping my hip with hers. “You missed the cake cutting!”

“Sorry Pinkie, had a quick emergency,” I apologized, “I had to step outside for a second.”

Her face turned serious for a moment, “Are you okay?”

I waved a hoof in the air, trying to brush off the question, “Yeah, yeah, I’m fine Pinkie, thanks for worrying.” She smiled in relief, and I turned my attention back to the room, looking for the mare, but not able to spot her through the crowd of ponies. “So, who’s the new pony? I never caught her name.”

“The name’s Illiad,” a voice spoke from my other side, causing me to jump. I turned to see the mare, and she held out a hoof, “Pleasure to meet you.”

I composed myself and took her hoof, shaking it awkwardly, “Astra.”

She paused for a moment, searching my face for a moment, before muttering, “Astra...have we met before? I feel like I’ve seen you.”

I opened my mouth to speak but paused, feeling like I was being tested, but I was unsure of what. I considered the writhing ball of emotions that was threatening to explode within me, still trying to understand what could possibly make me react this way about a pony from Canterlot that I’d only ever seen once. The only thing I could come up with was that I’d met her before I’d lost my memory but yet here she was, acting like we’d never met before. Except, a part of my mind muttered, she wasn’t acting like that. The question that she’d asked had been leading, as if she was fishing for information.

I realized that I’d been sitting there for a few seconds without responding, and Pinkie gave an awkward laugh, nudging my ribs as she said, “Sorry, she gets like this sometimes. Likes to be in her head a lot. We try to get her out, I Pinkie Promise.”

Iliad gave a small giggle, and I finally found my voice, huffing as I said, “Yeah, sorry, I get kinda lost in my own head sometimes. I did visit Canterlot a few months ago, I think I saw you there.”

Her eyebrows peaked, her voice probing as she asked, “Oh really, what’d you visit Canterlot for?”

I felt a part of me being scrutinized as she tried to pull information out, sounding almost innocent as she asked questions that I would answer with no thought if it wasn’t for the tumultuous feelings. Something was wrong here, and I didn’t know enough about myself or her to know what.

“Just wanted to take a trip to the big city,” I explained cautiously, trying to gauge her reaction.

She gave me a cool look, her voice almost dripping with venom as she said, “I didn’t realize that they let tourists into the castle.”

“I suppose they make an exception when you’re in the company of Princess Celestia’s student,” I shot back.

“Hey wait,” Pinkie interjected, “isn’t that the trip you, Twilight and Rarity took because you were having a dream and you wanted to see Pri-”

I raised a hoof, planting it on Pinkie’s lips, trying to shut her up, but realizing that she’d already said too much. I gave a small chuckle, trying to brush it off, “Okay so maybe I visited Luna, I was having a weird dream.”

Illiad narrowed her eyes at me. “Are you sure that we’ve never met each other before?”

I felt my chest seize up, a small moment flashing through my mind, a push, a scream, falling. But it was gone in a moment, and I was left unsure of what I had just seen, the vision fading immediately, just an impression left on my tongue. “No, I don’t think I have,” I spat, a feeling of regret welling up to the surface of the ball of emotions. “I have to go, if you don’t mind, something’s come up.”

I broke away from the two, not giving Illiad a moment to speak, hurrying out the front door to the bakery. I took a step out, tumbling as I collided with another pony. I tipped forward, going head over heels over the barrel of the pony and I landed on my back, head spinning as the sun beat down on me. A pony appeared above me and it took a moment for me to be able to focus to realize that Fluttershy was standing above me.

“Oh dear, I hope I didn’t hurt you,” she said, looking concerned and reaching a hoof out to me.

I took it and groaned as she helped me up, “No, no, I’m good Fluttershy, just going too fast out the door.”

I took a look back, Fluttershy following my gaze as she asked, “Oh, is the party over already? I was a little late because of an emergency.”

I shook my head, “No, I just...needed to get out. Had to get some air.”

Fluttershy smiled at me, “I know the feeling.” She looked back to the door, then at me again. “Want to take a walk? I can apologize to Pinkie later.”

I was silent for a moment, unsure of what I wanted at the moment, but deciding that I’d rather be in the company of a friend rather than be alone right now. I nodded and began to walk down the path from Sugarcube Corner, Fluttershy falling into step next to me. It was silent for a minute, me lost in my thoughts, and Fluttershy just being a comforting presence.

“Do you want to talk about what you’re thinking about,” she eventually asked.

“I...There’s a lot,” I said, unsure of where I would even start.

She gave me a comforting smile, “I’ve got the time for a friend.”

I felt the tightness in my chest loosen a little at the smile, and I gave her a slow nod. I spotted a bench and led the way to it, taking a seat at it and beginning to explain the reaction that I had when I’d seen Illiad. I tried to describe the tangled mess of feelings that I couldn’t even begin to unravel and understand but from the look on her face I hadn’t done a great job explaining it.

“It’s just like...I feel like I might know who she is, and that she might know who I am. Or who I was,” I finished lamely. “I don’t know though, and from the way she didn’t come out and say something makes me feel like she doesn’t know, or…”

“Or…” Fluttershy prompted, interested in hearing me finish the statement.

“Or maybe she has a reason that she wants me to not remember.” Fluttershy was quiet after that and I was quick to stammer out, “Ahhh nevermind, I’m just overthinking everything. I’m probably just looking for meaning where there is none. I’m sure she’s a nice mare, and she’ll fit in just fine.”

The look on her face was unconvinced, and she reached a hoof out, brushing mine as she said, “Hey, I’ll talk to the other girls, okay? We’ll be on the lookout, and see if we can find anything out.”

“Thanks Fluttershy,” I said softly, a small smile gracing my features. “I really needed this.”

She shook her head, “What kind of friend would I be if I didn’t help you out when you clearly needed it?”

After that we talked for a little bit, Fluttershy explaining what had been happening with her animals, with me politely listening, and her returning the favor as I explained the movement of the stars over the last month. We parted ways after a bit, exchanging a hug and going on our ways across town. I made my way to the market after that, buying some groceries that I’d been meaning to buy for a while and making my way back home. I opened the door, making my way in and turning the light on, pausing at the mess and sighing before closing the door and heading to the kitchen, grumbling to myself about cleaning up. I put everything away and made my way back into the living room, my eyes glazing over as I stared at the trash littering the floor, before I looked at the bookshelf, my eyes locking on one particular book. I used my magic to levitate it out, the deep crimson cover flipping open as it drew near, opening on the bookmark that I had left in last time I’d stopped to read. I settled down on the couch, getting lost in the pages as I tried to distract myself from the thoughts raging for attention now that I was alone.

A knock on the door caused me to jump, and I slowly focused, realizing that I’d been sitting here for a few hours at least as the sun had gone down. I put the bookmark back in the book, frowning as I noticed I was still on the same page, and got up. I made my way to the door and opened it, coming face to face with Dash.

“Oh,” I blinked.

“Hey,” she said lamely, giving a small wave. We fell into a silence and I felt a tension appear that I could almost choke on. “Could I...maybe come in?” A breeze blew by and I was suddenly aware of how cold it had become outside without the sun high in the sky and I silently made way, still unsure of what to say. She moved past me, pausing before entering the living room, surveying the state of it.

“I know,” I finally broke my silence. “I keep meaning to clean it, but I just…”

“It’s hard to clean if your mind is focused somewhere else,” Dash said, almost absentmindedly. “I could help.”

I shook my head, even though she wasn’t looking at me, “No, it’s fine Dash, I’ll get around to cleaning it up eventually.”

She looked back at me, a pleading look in her eyes, “A, stop being so nice and let me back in…” I was silent, just looking at her, searching her eyes, looking for something but unsure of what. “Please.”

I gave her a small, almost imperceptible nod, and she let out a hoarse breath, almost sounding like she was about to cry. I went to the kitchen and grabbed a trash bag, coming back to the living room and sidling up to Dash, the two of us working in silence as my magic held the bag open. Piece after piece of trash made its way into the bag, bottles, paper plates, old pizza boxes, plastic cups. It felt cathartic to work, picking up pieces of scattered trash, almost like I was trying to collect the scattered pieces of myself. I paused, looking over at Dash, just watching as she worked. She seemed so focused, just entirely centered on picking up piece after piece of me, trying to help me.

“Thank you.”

I said it so softly I wasn’t even sure I had spoken, but it was enough to make Dash pause. She looked over at me and it wasn’t until she made her way across the room and was hugging me tightly that I realized that I was crying.

She rubbed my back and gave a small shushing sound as she said, “Hey, it’s alright, it’s okay. You’re okay Astra, I promise.”

I felt myself almost collapse into her as I began to sob, unsure of why I was suddenly breaking down but unable to stop myself. Dash kept holding me, rocking me slowly as she ran a hoof up and down my back.

I don’t know how long we were like that but I eventually pulled away Dash’s chest soaked with my tears. “I...I’m a fucking mess,” I said, letting out a wry chuckle and burying my face back into her chest.

“Hey, we’re all a mess,” Dash said, not letting go of me. “We all need a little help sometimes.”

“Thank you,” I said into her chest, breathing in deep and closing my eyes as her scent filled my nose. “I just...I’ve felt so lost and I just always feel like I’m barely being held together. I don’t know who I am, I don’t know where I came from, I don’t know...anything.”

Dash was silent and I was about to say more but she finally spoke up, “A, I’m just scared of losing you. I don’t want you to…” She trailed off for a moment, picking back up shakily, “We both know I lied about the timberwolf. I won’t lie about that anymore. I’m being honest. I’m gonna…” She went quiet again. I looked up and caught sight of her face, fear having engraved itself on her features, and her eyes watering up. I reached a hoof up, stroking the side of her face. She leaned into it, a tear falling as she did so, and the fear slowly was replaced with a determined look. “I was working that day, busting clouds above the Whitetail Woods. I was getting a little tired, and was looking for a nice cloud to rest on. I’d spotted a nice, thick one that looked pretty comfy, but then I heard a scream. It sounded like it had come from above me and it didn’t make sense to me at the time but I looked up and I saw...you. You were falling. There was a pony falling from Canterlot, and I was the only one around. I raced to catch you, but when I got to you…”

“The inhibitor,” I murmured.

“I panicked. I didn’t know what to do, I couldn’t fly and I was tumbling with you, and the trees were coming up so fast. I managed to spread my wings and get a bit of drag but it was still a tough landing, we both got beat up pretty badly.” She ran a hoof against my cheek softly, right on my scar. “And then there was the walk to Ponyville. There was so much blood, from both of us, and I kept slipping. I felt helpless, and I almost dropped you. I thought about just laying you down and running into town to get somepony. Twilight says that if I’d done that...And then you were gone, Twilight and Redheart doing their best to help you, and all I could do was think about you...just...falling from Canterlot.”

I whispered, “I...jumped.”

Dash tightened her grip on me, “Maybe. I thought so at the time, but you haven’t been suicidal since you got here so I don’t know about that anymore.”

“I don’t remember Dash,” I said, aware now more than ever just how much I didn’t know about myself.

“I know A.”

We were silent after that, me trying to process what Dash had told me, and Dash just comforting me. I shifted my head, looking up at her. She looked down at me and I felt my body moving without thinking, my lips meeting hers. She let out a noise of surprise, freezing up for a moment before relaxing and leaning into the kiss. I pulled away from the kiss, meeting her eyes for a moment before going back in for a second kiss, this one harder and more forceful, trying to convey the absurd amount of feelings that were rushing through me in one single action.

She pulled away first this time, her chest heaving as she tried to catch her breath. “A, is this...Are you...sure?” I nodded, almost desperate as I leaned back in for another kiss. Dash leaned back again, a concerned look on her face, “A, I just told you that you might have jumped from Canterlot.”

I sat back, the distance between us causing a pain in my chest, “I know I just...I just don’t…”

“You don’t want to confront it,” she said, causing me to wince.

“Please…” I pleaded, “I don’t want to think about it. I’m happy here in Ponyville. If I jumped then it must have been bad, but now it’s fine. I have you, and the rest of the girls. I don’t need anything else.”

She was quiet for a moment, lost in her thoughts before speaking, “A, I came here tonight because I made a decision. We’re going to find out who you were, and I’m going to stop lying. To you, to Twilight, to the rest of the girls. I’ve been hiding this for the last half a year, and now that I’ve told you I feel...better. But I feel like you’re unsteady, which I can understand. I don’t know how I’d handle being told that I might have committed suicide.”

The word caused a sharp spike of pain to lance through my head and I winced, taking a sharp breath as a memory surfaced, long enough for me to grab bits and pieces, before it fell beyond the murky surface of my missing memories again.

“‘We don’t want you here anymore Apollo. You’re a fucking disgrace.’ Somepony said that to me.”

Dash stared at me, mouth slightly open and a worried look on her face. “Do you...you remember that?”

“I don’t remember who or why, just that they were mad at me.” I scrambled in my mind to try and find something else to latch onto, but I couldn’t put a face or a name to the voice saying those horrible words to me.

“Your name was Apollo…Sounds like a stallion’s name,” Dash remarked. “I like Astra better.”

I gave a small laugh, feeling exhaustion begin to creep in as I wrestled with the feelings running amok in my mind. “Hey Dash...can you stay here tonight?” She didn’t answer at first, looking down at me in silence as she thought. Eventually she nodded, standing up and wrapping her wing around me, leading me down the hall to my bedroom. “Thank you,” I mumbled blearily, my eyes drifting shut as Dash opened the door to my bedroom. By the time we’d made the few steps to my bed I was almost asleep on my hooves and Dash helped me lay down in bed. I didn’t even remember my head hitting the pillow.

Author's Note:

I'm enjoying writing again, it's feeling nice to get into the groove day after day of putting my ideas down. I'm not sure how many more chapters this will have, maybe one or two, but we'll see what's up. If anyone is interested, I'll be streaming me and my static raiding tonight and tomorrow in Final Fantasy XIV on twitch.tv/justsilf at 10 pm EST (just a shameless plug don't mind me)