• Published 29th Aug 2012
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Bros in Equestria - Mandroid

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Exposition and Espionage.

Canterlot looked even more impressive on the inside then it did from the outside, and that was saying something. Cobblestone streets melded with marble towers in ways you could barely believe. You and Mous stood in awe at the remarkable city these ponies had built for themselves as the rest of your new friends filed out of the car.

Twilight approached the two of you with a smile. "Follow me and stay close you two, we're headed to the royal palace." She says.

"Understood." Mous answered.

You gave her a smile of your own "Lead the way Twilight."

As you all walked, you noticed that these ponies were giving you the same looks as the ones in the town you caught the train in. Most of them were of curiosity or confusion, but you're sure you saw a few looks of disgust in there.

You glanced at Mous to see that his eyes were darting in every direction. He looked nervous.

That had you concerned. "Something the matter man?" You whispered.

He leaned in close to you "There's an awful lot of guards in this city, Very City 17." He whispered back.

You looked up to investigate and saw that, yes, there were indeed many guards at various posts around the city. Some on roofs, some flying through the air, and some on the ground. Every guard looked the same, with a pale white coat and a set of golden armor, the only difference being whether they had horns or wings. And every last one of them was watching you.

Your concerns about being watched were pushed away however, as you arrive at what could only be the royal palace. As you reached the top of the stairs, Twilight stopped to address the guards on duty.

"We're here to see the Princess, we've brought...friends." She says.

She must have noticed everyone staring too, she looked nervous. Luckily, the guard nodded and ended the moment.

"The Princess is in the throne room, she is expecting you." He says.

With that you were ushered into the palace proper. You eventually entered into a large room with an equally large throne in the rear of it, a rich red carpet lead up to the throne and stained glass windows displaying various events were on the walls. Sitting on the throne was a slightly taller pony of dark blue with a long flowing mane, a mane you swear you could see constellations in. In addition to her coloration, you noticed that she featured both a unicorn horn and pegusi wings. You remember from your lesson that "Alicorns" as they were rare, and considered royalty.

Based on what Twilight told you on the train, you could guess that this was princess Luna. Freed from her thousand year term as Nightmare Moon and returned to rule with her sister. Twilight stops short with a puzzled expression.

"Princess Luna? Why are you here during the day, where's Celestia?" She asked.

You don't know if it's the acoustics of the room or if Luna was actually that loud, but you almost went deaf when she spoke.

"Worry not, Twilight Sparkle. Our sister is away on an urgent matter and has ask Us to hold court until her return. She shall do so soon." Luna says.

Placated, Twilight continues to walk towards the throne with the rest of you in tow. As you walk, you put your hand to your ear to see if you have tinnitus now, Rainbow must have noticed because she flew over to you.

"Hehe. Be glad she wasn't using her royal voice, that's ten times louder then what you heard." She joked.

What? She could go louder than that? You make a mental note to not get Luna to shout, for your own sake. As you approached the throne, Luna stepped down to greet you all. Her eye's fell to the two of you and she spoke up again, this time in a more pleasant volume.

"You must be the subject of Twilight Sparkle's letter, she had written that she was bringing a pair of strange creatures to the palace and we feared the worst."

That explains all the guards at least, but you wonder what kind of creature warranted that many soldiers.

"Tell Us creature, do you have a name?" Luna asked as she looked you over.

"I'm Anon and this is Mous." you say, Mous nodding at his name. "It's an honor Your Highness." you add a bow as you say it.

Luna seemed pleased. "Rise Anon, there is no need for that." She turned towards Mous "And you Mous? Have thee anything you wish to say?"

Mous kept his hands in his pockets as he spoke and put on a small smile.

"My companions words mirror my own Princess Luna, it is a pleasure to meet you." he answered with a slight nod of his head.

Princess Luna looked over the lot of you and spoke. "It seems thou hast found two rather intriguing beings Twilight Sparkle. Not only are they unrecorded, but they show proper etiquette in the presence or Royalty."

"However, We would recommend that we refrain from deeper questions until mine sister arrives." Luna added.

"That will not be necessary Sister, I am here." came a voice that reminded you a bit of your mom.

If Luna was larger than most ponies, then this one must be massive. In walked an alicorn of at least five feet, her horn pushing her well past six. Her wings were out and appeared to be equal to her height in terms of wingspan. Her mane, like Luna's', had an almost ethereal quality to it and seemed to flow despite their being no wind. If this was Luna's sister, then this must be the one and only Princess Celestia, ruler of Equestria and bringer of the sun.

Twilight got an excited look on her face and bounded up to her.

"Princess!" She shouted.

As she reached her they both placed their necks in each others. Some sort of pony greeting you guess. The princess approached you both as her eyes darted back and forth between the two of you, though her warm smile never left.

"You must be the creatures my student wrote me about, I welcome you to Canterlot. I suggest we find somewhere more comfortable where you can indulge our curiosities." she says.

Oh hell. First Twilight on the train and now her teacher in a palace, this was looking to be a long day. You heard an exasperated sigh over your shoulder before Mous spoke up.

"Let me save all of us some time. We are Humans, male, in our mid twenties with a life expectancy of 80. We come from a planet called Earth where there are billions of others like us. Our diet is omnivorous and our species evolved from apes millions of years ago. We have absolutely no idea how we came to your kingdom save that it involved a bright white light and a lot of spinning. We are grateful for your hospitality and are of no threat to you or your kingdom and its inhabitants."

The room was silent as all eyes were on Mous standing there with his arms crossed.

"Anything else you wanted to know, your Highness?" He says, a scent of irritation creeping into his voice.

Celestia's eyes narrowed as she stared at the both of you.

"You say that the way you arrived here had a bright white light?" she asked.

"It got through our thick blinds enough to light up the room like the sun." you answered.

A "Hmmm..." was all you got from Celestia as she paced for a moment before looking at her student.

"Twilight, your letter said that these humans arrived with a building of some kind, were there scorch marks on the outside?"

What? Scorch marks? You didn't see any scor-

"Yes Princess, as well as a lot of magical residue. The curious thing was that I didn't find any on Anon or Mous at all." Twilight responded.

"Wait a second." You say. "I didn't see any scorch marks."

Mous put his hand on your shoulder and turned you to him. "I saw em dude. They were going up from the underside of the house. You probably missed them what with the weirdness of the moment."

Mous looked around the room. "No offense." he says quietly.

"None taken." says Celestia. "This is a rather strange situation. It almost sounds like a Waygate brought the both of you here, but there would be residue from it on the both of you. Unless..."

Celestia turned towards the both of you. From her horn erupted a white light that lanced towards Mous, he raised his arm to protect his head only for the light to hit his stomach and cascade off as if it were water. You cringed as some of the light raced towards you but it did the same thing when it hit your outstretched arm. Splintering over it and hitting the walls behind you. You looked at Mous. He looked pissed.

"Grrr...What the hell lady!?" he shouted as his eyes went wild and his arm went to the back of his belt.

Celestia was quick to diffuse, however. "I apologize but I had to rule out the possibility that you two both had a way of disrupting magic that could only take effect if you were aware of it. That does not appear to be the case." She says.

"So what is the case?" Mous growled, his head low.

"Tell me human, do they have magic on your world? she asked, standing her ground.

"No" you responded. "No, we don't have magic."

The Princess lowered her head and shut her eyes for a moment.

"So that's what it is..."

Celestia turned and looked Twilight in the eye.

"It would appear that these two are immune to the direct effects of magic." She turned back to the two of you. "Most likely from being from a world where it does not exist."

Mous relaxed a bit.

"You mean that everyone in Equestria is magic in some way?" He asked.

Celestia canted her head to the side as she spoke. "All of My little ponies are, along with several of the other species that inhabit out forests."

She walked over to the other five ponies and spoke again.

"Unicorns are the primary users of magic due to their horns, which act as a focus." After she spoke, Rarity's hair was enveloped in a light blue aura and as it re-arranged itself into a better shape.

"Pegusi have a more inherent connection to magic, one that allows them to walk on and interact with clouds."

Rainbow Dash spoke up with that "Yeah, it's what lets us change the weather to whatever we need."

Celestia came up to Applejack last "Earth Ponies have a special connection to the land itself. One that makes them ideal for agriculture." Applejack smiled and nodded at that last part.

"So...magic can effect ponies because they all have some magic inside them? Like a current?" you asked.

"Precisely." Celestia says. "What's more, even species that cannot use magic themselves are affected by it, as the land of Equestria itself is magical. Their time here causes them to absorb some of the latent magics into their bodies."

"But you two..." she continued "You two seem to be blocked off to all magic. Direct or latent." she finished.

Huh. Blocked off from all magic in a world where it was prevalent? That was kinda cool, almost like a super power.

Celestia picked up again. "However. There is one more test I would like to perform, with your permission of course." she says as she bowed her head.

"Uh...sure." you say, curious as to where this would go. You turned to your bro


He seemed to think for a minute then relaxed from his defensive stance and spread his arms. "Whenever you're ready, your majesty." He says.

Celestia nodded and caused her horn to glow, followed by your shirt starting to glow. You felt your shirt move on its own and saw that Mous was dealing with the same thing. Your chest leaned forward as you tried to hold your ground before the glow receded, taking the pulling sensation with it.

"It seems that you are, however, effected by an environment manipulated by magic." she says with a smile.

You guess every super power has a weakness. Here's hoping no one gets mad enough to play "the floor is lava" for real.

"So what does this mean?" you hear Mous ask.

"Why it means that we're just going to have to try that much harder if we're to send you back!" says Celestia "That will take some time, however, therefore I invite you to stay in Equestria as a guest of the crown."

This princess was nice, accommodating you at the same time as she worked to fix your situation without asking for something in return? You wish some people back on Earth were like that.

"Thank you your majesty, you're too kind." You bow after you finish, even Mous bows with you albeit not as deep.

"Now, you'll need a place to stay. I understand that your home came with you when you arrived here?" she asked with a grin.

Twilight answered for you. "Yes Princess, it landed in a field on the outskirts of Ponyville."

Giggling at a town called Ponyville seemed rude at a time like this, so you silenced yourself. Wait, your home got wrecked when it landed.

"Excuse me Princess, but our home was damaged when it landed, all of our power and plumbing was severed. The house is rather inhospitable right now." You say.

Twilight turned to look at you. "Oh don't worry, I can fix that by just altering the ley lines in town a bit. That's how the rest of the town takes care of utilities. We can help you fix any structural damage too."

Wow, these ponies were practically saints by your standards.

"So...now what?" Mous asked as he returned he hands to his pockets.

Twilight puts a hoof to her chin. "Hmmm...I was planning on us being here longer, the train back doesn't leave for a while."

Luna speaks up for the first time in a while. "We fear that the citizens of Canterlot may not be as open to the prospect of unknown creatures walking around its walls. We offer you free passage to this floor of the palace until you may take your leave, but venture no further."

Luna's words made sense, just because you were permitted to stay didn't mean you should go and announce it.

"Thank you Princess, I'll take you up on that." you say.

As both Luna and Celestia nod you make your way over to the stained glass windows you saw. Out of the corner of your eye you see Celestia talk to Luna and leave the room, royal duties probably.

"That's a nice garden out there."

Your turn to see Mous standing at the window next to you.

"Are we allowed out there?" he asks.

Luna nods her head and points towards the door you came in.

"Head down that door and take the stairs on your right, they will take you to the garden."

Mous nods his head in thanks and walks off as you turn your attention back to the window. You're so engrossed that you don't notice Twilight walk up beside you.

"Enjoying yourself?" she asks causing you to jump.

She giggles a bit at your expense before she looks at the window, her face dropping.

"This window shows what a horrible place Discord made Equestria before the Princesses stopped him." she says.

The window show some sort of creature that seemed to be an amalgam of several others controlling ponies with puppet controllers.

"Hold the phone, I thought you said that you and your friends beat Discord?" you asked, starting to lose the nice little history you had in your head.

"That was after he got released." she answered, putting your mind at ease.

You continued looking at the window until a thought entered your mind. This window overlooked the garden where Mous was and you couldn't see him. That made you nervous.

=Mous Point of View=

This garden was as nice as you thought. It was quiet here, save for the birds. The setting sun cast harsh shadows over the statues. You heard something behind you. A small hallway leading into the castle rests underneath an archway. You can hear muffled voices coming from it.


You start walking through the hallway, hoping to find the source of the voices. You are careful to make as little noise with your feet as possible. No easy task in boots. The voices are getting louder, but not easier to decipher. The echo in here was distorting them. You could hear one male and one female however. You heard a laugh from the female as you reached the corner it was coming through. You took a quick peek around to see who was there. To your surprise, it was Celestia, she seemed to be talking to a guard. "So that's where you went." You think you yourself. You listen in.

"You did well at your "post" earlier Corporal." Celestia says, in a voice you could only describe as sultry.

The corporal responded with a voice that spoke of gratitude.

"Thank you for allowing me to take that "post" your highness."

"It was my great pleasure." cooed Celestia. "In fact...I was hoping to see you at that post again." she says as she move closer to the guard. "Perhaps, tonight?"

You were spying on two ponies talk about their sex life. Gross.

Let's keep going.

The guard grew a wide smile on his face. "I will serve with great pride, your highness."

Celestia looked at him with lidded eyes. "Very good Corporal, now perhaps you should return you your current post before you are missed?" She says.

"Of course, your majesty." the guard says as he galloped down the hall.

As you stood, you saw that Celestia hadn't moved an inch. From the look of it, she was staring at the guards ass.

"I wondered why you were late earlier." You called out.

Celestia whirled around so fast you could hear the wind break.

"Now I know." You say as you stepped out into view.

"How much did you hear?" she asked with her eyes wide.

"Enough to guess that this palace doesn't seem to have an HR department."

Celestia regained a bit of her composure. "Why are you here? I thought you were waiting in the throne room." she asked.

"I took a walk in the garden and followed some voices I heard." You say.

You started walking towards her.

"A nice palace like this, you never know what kind of conspirators could be lurking about. I felt it was my duty to protect my new monarch."

She narrowed her eyes. "I shall have to install a door down here." she says.

"Or you could just talk about fucking your guards someplace where there aren't any other ponies. Try carrier birds."

She got a small grin as her eyes narrowed more, a glint of mischief sparking in them At least she could appreciate your sarcasm. You were a few feet apart now. She was staring into your eyes, not an angry stare, but a cold one.

"What will you do with this information then?"

That question sounded like a test to you. You keep staring at her in silence. If she was gonna pull that crap then she was gonna sweat it out for a bit.

"Nothing." you say flatly.

"Nothing?" she looked a bit taken aback.

"From what I understand, you're over a millennium old. To think that you've gone without for this entire time is idiotic. That guard seemed consenting enough, though I doubt he's the only one." You say.

You keep staring, your expression changing to one of slight boredom.

"Still, you seem on the level. I also owe you a debt for letting Anon and I stay in your kingdom. I have no problem keeping my mouth shut."

Her eyes widened but she kept her grin. "Well then we have an accord. Shall we return to the throne room?" she asks.

You step aside and extend your hands down the hall.

"Lead the way Princess."

You walked next to the princess for a ways until she spoke up again. "Your demeanor strikes me as odd, Mous. Many ponies would try to keep the fact that they heard what you heard hidden." she asked, not looking at you. You keep walking. You weren't going to make eye contact if she wasn't.

"I'm an odd kind of guy."

"Odd enough to try and sneak a knife into the home of royalty?" she asked.

Shit. She knew about that? Okay play it cool.

"I didn't know you then and I had to watch out for myself and Anon. If I had known what I know about you now, I probably wouldn't have bothered." You say.

She looked at you with a devious grin. "Why Mous, whatever do you mean by that?"

"You're kind. At least to the people you've never met."

She chuckled. "I'm rather kind to those I have met too."

Keep it deadpan. "I've noticed." You say.

You keep walking, letting that bit of innuendo die.

"But suicidal overconfidence isn't the only reason I'm odd."

"How so?" she asks playfully.

"Oh, I'm sure you'll find out Princess. I don't exactly hide it."

She nodded as you both kept walking. Eventually, you reached the throne room from the same entrance as Celestia came into earlier. She stopped you before you walked in.

"You are quite a unique individual Mous." She asked through lidded eyes. "I have one more question if you'll allow it."

Shit. You'll bite.


She leans close to whisper in your ear.

"Do you like bananas?"

You're almost certain that statement has some meaning, but damned if you can figure it out. Oh well, when in doubt, play it off. You put on your best mock offended face and look her in the eye.

"Why Princess, I certainly hope that you aren't implying that I enjoy bananas simply because my kind evolved from monkeys. I would think such speciesism above you" You tease.

You start to walk away and leave her there before stopping. You look at her over your shoulder with a grin.

"Besides, bananas are gross."

With that you keep walking. You can feel her own grin on your back. You ignore it and catch Anon's attention as he approaches you.

"Where'd you go dude? I couldn't see you out the window." He says.

No reason he should know what you saw.

"I got a little sidetracked in a hallway and got lost, the Princess found me and was kind enough to walk me back." You answer.

He looks over your shoulder and makes a face.

"That Princess?" he asks.

You look over your shoulder and see Celestia staring and grinning. If she's trying to rustle your jimmies, it isn't working.

"That's the one." you say as you turn back to Anon.

Anon takes his eyes off Celestia and shakes his head.

"Well, let's go. The train leaves in twenty minutes." he says.

"Right. Let's roll."

As you and your friends both old and new walk out, you hear the princess call out to you.

"Goodbye everyone, feel free to come back whenever you please." Celestia shouts.

You could find something sinister in that phrase if you looked... Fuck that, it's late and you've had a hell of a day.

The train ride back was considerably quieter than the one from before. Everyone seemed tired after the events of the day. The only ones awake were you, Anon, Twilight and Rainbow Dash. Damn but this scenery was boring.

Even worse than the first ride up here, you couldn’t see a damn thing. Probably something to do with it being night. Well, almost couldn’t see a damn thing, you could see stars. You have to hand it to Luna, she made her night sky damned impressive.

You could never hope to see a view like this back home. Even with Canterlot off in the distance, the stars were shining bright. You couldn’t begin to count them all. Twilight snuck up on the two of you, interrupting your train of thought. Hehe... “Train of thought.”

”Have the two of you put any thought into where you were going to stay?” she asked.

Huh? Was the apartment not good enough?

"Is our apartment not good enough?” Anon retorted.

That was why he was your bro. You two were always on the same wavelength.

”Well, I guess it could.” She says. Her face was contorting, she looked doubtful.

”But didn’t you say that your house was damaged? Are you sure you want to stay there?” She asked.

Damn. You forgot about that yourself. You put your hand on the window. Shit, It was Hoth cold outside. You did not want to stay in a house without heat when it was like this outside.

”I guess you’re right…” Anon sighed out.

Fuck. This was not good. Living on another planet was one thing, living on one with no house was another.

”Hey! You guys can crash I my place if you want.”

Huh? You look behind your seat, Rainbow Dash was listening in.

”Having some guests for a while might be cool.” She says.

This girl only just met you and was already offering her house to you. That was serious bro material. Twilight shook her head.

”That isn’t going to work Rainbow. “

Everyone turns to Twilight.

”These two can’t walk on clouds like you can and they’re both immune to magic so we can’t exactly try a cloud walking spell.” She says.

Oh yeah. You had magic immunity. You haven’t had it for a day and it’s already biting you in the ass.

Well shit.

”So what do we do now?”

Twilight puts a hoof to her chin and thinks. ”Well, I suppose you can stay in the Library until we can get your home fixed up.”

Worked for you. You turned to Anon.

”You game?”

He nodded at you. ”Beggars can’t be choosers, we don’t have much of a choice.” He says.

He had a point there.

Twilight perked up. ”Perfect. You two will stay with me tonight.” She says with a grin.

After stepping of the train, you, Anon and Twilight said your goodbyes to the others and made way for her house. You picked up some “dinner” at a bakery on the way. Had to keep your energy up. Twilight levitated the two of you some pillows and blankets as she prepared to take a sleeping Spike up to bed.
She looked sheepishly at you. ”I don’t have any extra beds in your size. Sorry…”

”You’ve done more than enough letting us sleep here, Twilight. We can tough it out for a night.” You say.

That seemed to cheer her up. She smiled as she walked up stairs. ”Goodnight you two.” She called out.

”G’night.” You both says.

You and Anon lay down on the hardwood floor as Twilight turns out the lights. It was quiet here. Deafeningly quite. Damn your tinnitus.

As you lie there, you have a thought.

”Hey, dude.”

”What’s up?” You hear Anon ask in the darkness.

”…You think our families noticed what happened?”

You hear him sigh. He probably thought of that, he had more family members then you did. Not to mention more that he liked.

”I don’t know man, probably. It’s not like an apartment disappearing into thin air is common or anything.” He says.

You lay there for a moment. ”It’s just, we could be here for a while.”

Your mom was probably worried sick if she had heard. Assuming she wasn’t raising hell trying to find you. You hear him shift on the hardwood.

“…Yeah. We could.”

You both lay there in silent. Well shit, this mood went sour quick. Have to salvage it at least a little bit.

”Still, might as well make the best of it. If we fix up the apartment then we can at least be comfortable until Celestia comes up with something.”

”Yeah, you’re right there.” You hear him say.

As you lay there, you hear him yawn. The events of the day must be catching up to him. Inter-dimensional travel sure takes it out of a guy.

”Night bro.”

”Goodnight, dude.” He says, yawning again.

You lay on the hard floor for a bit longer until eventually Anon’s snoring lulls you to sleep.

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