When people begin suffering intense nightmares that kill their victims, salvation comes in the form of a young girl who overcame her despair through sheer force of will. She is the Trickster, and she will become the light in the darkness.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Naturally.
That is really fucking sweet.
1, Azure finds it funny.
2, I find it funny.
3, Your discomfort is HILARIOUS.
Smart girl.
Accurate.
Oh she does.
Dash is wonderful.
Kinda. There's a bit more to it than that, but you've got the right idea.
That's probably part of it.
Ah. Not a very subtle name, but it works.
You're braver than most.
That's a thing?
Ah, now I get it. I'm learning so much today.
Good.
I don't like you already.
Chrysalis and Sunset? Now that's interesting.
A poor choice of words.
OK, this is interesting. Sunset's eyes are teal, so I guess that's blue. But the Channeling Ring is what interests me.
A mix of Charm Person and Modify Memory. You're an accomplished spellcaster-
Oh, now that's an interesting shout out.
Oh now that is interesting.
Methinks that's the God/Goddess that comes at the end of Persona games.
Maybe, but they're pulling people out of killer nightmares, so I'm with them.
Oh this is going to be fun.
I'm VERY curious about this mentality.
Adagio Dazzle.
Ah, so a Unicron esque "I want to annihilate existence" type thing?
Wasn't your goal a Death Star thing?
9833917
Strega is a cult that appeared in Persona 3. It was owned by a man named Takaya, and he and two other Persona Users used the Dark Hour to kill people without being caught. Chrysalis is trying to revive this group.
9833946
Sounds like a bunch of assholes.
9833948
They were the closest thing Persona 3 had to main antagonists.
Sunset and Chrysalis together, and they have plans for Adagio. Clearly a group of antagonists, but are they the main antagonists. Either way, this group could cause more and more trouble for our heroes the longer they last. I do like how Chrysalis directly mentions Nyx. I read your blogs talking about Nyx and the other gods and it is fun to see Nyx name dropped like that. Keeps the feeling of continuity strong.
Sunset's officially in the story: That's good.
But she's with Chrysalis: That's bad.
9834589
And trying to resurrect a cult of psycho killers: that's worse.
Before I even get into this story, what happened to Mythril Moth?
9890194
He died a few months ago. I think it was due to complications in the hospital.
Goodness, six chapters left
I like this story. It's interesting that you're using Starlight as the protagonist as that's something I've never seen before(even if it's a heavily AU version of her). I also like the fact that dreams are the main theme here as a major theme of the Persona series is psychology(even it's more Jungian) and the deep subconscious and dreams represent both of those themes very well.
You also do a decent job of translating game mechanics to a narrative format,even if think that sometimes the way it's presented is a little artificial. Celestia explicitly calling them Social Links even if logically, she would have no way of knowing that's what they're called stands out to me as an example of this. Like the way she calls them Social Links instead of something more natural sounding feels off to me.
I want you to know that I don't think the story is bad,not at all.This next part is going to sound harsh and I'm sorry for that,but I truly feel like this was a mistake on your part and I just don't agree with the choices made here:
Despite liking the story though,there is a big problem with this story that completely breaks my suspension of disbelief and prevents me from fully enjoying it like I want to:The disconnect between the AU EQG world and the canon Persona world. More specifically,the clash between the normal pony naming conventions(Like Twilight Sparkle and Pinkie Pie) and real-world Japanese naming conventions like the Persona series uses(Like Yukiko Amagi and Akihiko Sanada) It... doesn't work well and it fits together clumsily to me.
Maybe it would've worked if you had translated the canon Persona characters names to pony ones or done the opposite and made up real human names for the EQG counterparts, but this mish-mash of half this and half that makes a huge hole in your worldbuilding.
Like maybe this wouldn't have been so noticeable if the canon Persona characters weren't that tied to the plot,but they are! Celestia and Twilight, major characters in this story, have ties to them and references them constantly. Apparently, the canon persona characters still live in Japan and keep their real world Japanese names and yet for some weird reason, Fluttershy in your story is a transfer student from Japan and she still has her canon pony name? Why? Are there a lot of drastically different customs for naming a person in Japan that I'm not aware of? Why? Did the canon Persona characters drop in from another universe and decided to stay there? Why? Is Japan is the only country that has real world naming conventions and the rest of the world uses pony ones? If so,why?
This one choice opens up a lot of holes in the story that doesn't make any sense and makes the world less believable. All i want in a story is that the internal logic and worldbuilding are consistent and this isn't.
It feels like you wanted a compromise of making your own original world and involving the canon characters,but the way you chose accomplishes neither IMO. On a meta level,I know keeping the pony names is because you probably wanted to be able to keep the FiM/EQG characters recognizable,given the heavy AU nature of the story and for the canon Persona characters you kept their names the same because you didn't want to change them,but in universe it's nonsensical.
I didn't want to compare this story to other FiM/Persona crossovers,but Persona:EG sidestepped this issue by making it clear that the story took place in an AU EQG world and avoided using canon characters unless it was a tongue-in-cheek reference.Maybe it's no big deal to others,which is fine,enjoy what you want,but for me it's an SOD breaking flaw that doesn't work and ruins the story for me.
Good luck on whatever you work on next!
Archmage Gaia
MORE
Hey, you okay there? This hasn't updated since September. Have you just lost your muse, or is it something more serious?
10049448
It's more the former. I'm doing some internal work to figure out what's blocking me, since I do WANT to complete this story. I still haven't introduced a character I REALLY want to introduce, and I'm like RIGHT at the point where they appear.
There is a big problem with this story that completely breaks my suspension of disbelief and prevents me from fully enjoying it like I want to:The disconnect between the AU EQG world and the canon Persona world. More specifically,the clash between the normal pony naming conventions(Like Twilight Sparkle and Pinkie Pie) and real-world Japanese naming conventions like the Persona series uses(Like Yukiko Amagi and Akihiko Sanada) It... doesn't work well and it fits together clumsily to me.
Maybe it would've worked if you had translated the canon Persona characters names to pony ones or done the opposite and made up real human names for the EQG counterparts, but this mish-mash of half this and half that makes a huge hole in your worldbuilding.
Like maybe this wouldn't have been so noticeable if the canon Persona characters weren't that tied to the plot,but they are! Celestia and Twilight, major characters in this story, have ties to them and references them constantly. Apparently, the canon persona characters still live in Japan and keep their real world Japanese names and yet for some weird reason, Fluttershy in your story is a transfer student from Japan and she still has her canon pony name? Why? Are there a lot of drastically different customs for naming a person in Japan that I'm not aware of? Why? Did the canon Persona characters drop in from another universe and decided to stay there? Why? Is Japan is the only country that has real world naming conventions and the rest of the world uses pony ones? If so,why?
This one choice opens up a lot of holes in the story that doesn't make any sense and makes the world less believable. All i want in a story is that the internal logic and worldbuilding are consistent and this isn't.
It feels like you wanted a compromise of making your own original world and involving the canon characters,but the way you chose accomplishes neither IMO. On a meta level,I know keeping the pony names is because you probably wanted to be able to keep the FiM/EQG characters recognizable,given the heavy AU nature of the story and for the canon Persona characters you kept their names the same because you didn't want to change them,but in universe it's nonsensical.
I didn't want to compare this story to other FiM/Persona crossovers,but Persona:EG sidestepped this issue by making it clear that the story took place in an AU EQG world and avoided using canon characters unless it was a tongue-in-cheek reference.Maybe it's no big deal to others,which is fine,enjoy what you want,but for me it's an SOD breaking flaw that doesn't work and ruins the story for me.
Good luck on whatever you work on next!
Archmage Gaia
10069093
Ok that’s a book right there well done mate… now on to your comment. Yes I can see your point it’s a little jarring and hard to keep up with but here’s the thing... I can keep going reading this because it isn’t the weirdest thing I’ve seen on here or on the internet as a whole. It’s up there and no mistake but not the weirdest by far.
I caught up at last. Work has been taking away my time all that it can.P with the corona
10178851
Nice
10344197
So it is; my apologies. That does make me wonder why you went for the Japanese name in an American based setting rather than the English one.
10344629
Best explanation is due to Rainbow Dash's psyche. She's into anime, and in particular prefers the subs over dubs. Her Persona reflects this by going with the Japanese name for Lightning rather than the English one.
10344940
Also Eclair is French for Lightning. An American girl choosing a French name for a concept introduced in a Japanese game. There's a joke in there somewhere, I'm sure.
10346394
Probably is. Sadly the heat right now has me too drained to figure that out.
10346750
10354705
I don't like the Lovers Arcana. It's my least fave of the Tarot Cards.
hello will you ever continue this amazing story I really want to read more of it!
10367846
I will continue it. I promised myself I would. But I burned myself out writing, and I'm planning a renewal of sorts.
Neeeeed more lol love the story so far hopefully you continue one day.
10354778
Why?
10644726
It's just not one of my fave social links to do. Love the Chariot and Magician's Social links.
10644745
Oh okay; I thought you might have had something against the tarot card specifically.
10644879
Oh no. I have nothing against the actual card itself and while I don't like the lovers social link. I don't hate them. It's just not my fave.
not to be petty, but i really must know what your theme naming for the starting personas are. we got greek/roman gods for p3, Japanese gods for p4, and thieves or tricksters of some kind for p5. I'm only up to rainbow dash's awakening and her farron eclaire, who i recognized from final fantasy fame, but morgona and elenora i have no idea, the best for the former being that she might be an alternate name for morgon le fey.
10942188
I actually do post where all the starting Personas for the party come from after they get Pinkie Pie back, but essentially they're supposed to be characters from pop culture or fiction in general.
Morgana _is_ Morgan le Fey.
Elenora is the main character from the book "Elenora, Daughter of Merlin"
And Serenity is Sailor Moon.
10943152
okay, kinda got that now. I also noticed their all spell users. I kinda wish you went more strictly with a theme ala the main games, like maybe have them all be from the king arthur mythos, though i suppose there not many female characters to note for a full cast, unless we're going fate up in here.
10944265
Essentially, all of them are characters that in one way or another, they all can relate to emotionally on some level. There's one that I'm suspecting no one will know where she comes from, but is a character from my favorite series of books.
Binged read the story. Still very good and love how its turning out
11193980
Wonderful! I just finished the latest chapter. Just going to write a few more before I begin updating and moving it to Ao3.
11194089
Excellent! Can't wait...but I will lol