Memoir of Misery

by Silvak

Chapter XXIX: Moments

"There’s one rule that you need to learn about fighting. You either be ready to take a hit or do your best to dodge the attack. There is no middle ground, for a hit to strike you could mean instant death. Hence, you must move to dodge or use your magic and even your body to block the hit to mitigate the damage."

"Okay... Auntie Steel..."

"Now, since you have wings, you'll be learning this lesson from Rift in terms of aerial combat. I'll be teaching you the ground-based combat skills that you will need, which includes learning how to tolerate the pain from a hit. Fortunately, Runic's examination of you revealed quite a bit about your Earth Pony traits, so I know the best way to start this lesson for you."

"What do you me—what are you doing with that big ha—Gah!"

---

Pulling her hoof from the mirror shard, Sapphire just blinked in surprise before looking at Luna, who was tapping her chin in thought. After spending so long helping Sapphire to recover her memories, Luna managed to create a spell that would allow her to witness the memories at the same time Sapphire could, as long as she was given permission that is.

"This Steel Coat, if I have the name right... I find this mare's method of training to be quite favorable," Luna declared, causing Sapphire to stare at her in shock.

"She hit me, when I was a filly, with a hammer, Luna..." Sapphire croaked out, only for Luna to wrap a foreleg around her shoulder.

"Yes, but that is to train you, and this mare holds no bars in terms of training! Alas, the guard of today has grown soft. Though, with a mare like this Steel Coat training them, they would get back into shape in a matter of months!" Luna stated with a smile. This caused Sapphire to feel sorry for the Royal Guard and possibly the Night Guard if Luna ever got a chance to train the two organizations to her specific desires.

---

"Why are you here in my study, Blueblood?" Sapphire asked, narrowing her eyes at the stallion that was always hostile to her every time they met. Sapphire so wished that she could banish him to the cold north to end up as an ice cube, but despite multiple requests, Celestia denied her desire on the account that Blueblood did serve a purpose in Canterlot's government. Though Sapphire doubted that was true since she never learned what it was.

"I'm here cause my Auntie told me to direct some of my requests for you," Blueblood answered with a roll of his eyes before he grumbled about how improper it was to be on a cushion. That was on the account that Sapphire's study was more designed for her to only study and nothing else.

Feeling her left eye twitch as she sat down on a cushion opposite of Blueblood, Sapphire replied, "And why did she send you to me instead of taking care of it herself?"

"That's the oddest thing. She said that this would be a good experience for what is to come. I don't understand what she meant, but enough of that, we have more important things to worry about. I have this proposal to tear down that ugly scho—" Blueblood started to say as Sapphire resisted the urge to groan and throw the stallion out the nearest window.

---

"If Baltimare is such a great place, then why would they need a princess when they're doing fine by themselves?" Sapphire asked as she was looking at a map on a table to the side of her study with Cadance by her side.

"Well, if they're great now, imagine how it could even be better with a princess guiding them?" Cadance proposed, causing Sapphire to give her a skeptical look.

"If you think a princess is needed to guide them, how about you lead them instead?" Sapphire replied before eyeing more of the map as she looked at Fillydephia, soon rejecting it as a potential city to visit.

"Oh... umm... since I'm engaged with Shining Armor, I have to stay in Canterlot until he retires from the Royal Guard," Cadance quickly answered as she gave Sapphire a forced smile.

"...And how long would that be then?" Sapphire asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Umm... uhh..." Cadance said as she looked to the side, before shaking her head as she took on a stern look. "Sapphire, as the senior princess here, I refuse to answer that question," Cadance declared with her head raised high.

Cocking her eyebrow, Sapphire asked, "Cadance, just how old are you?"

Tilting her head slightly, Cadance answered, "I'm twenty-seven, why you'd ask? And to inform you, it's improper to ask a mare about her age."

Smirking at Cadance, Sapphire stated, "Well, from what Celestia told me, I'm in my early thirties. Also, I've been an alicorn all my life, so one could say that I'm the senior alicorn here," before dropping her smile as she gave Cadance a hard stare. As Cadance's eyes widened in surprise, Sapphire continued, "So, I demand that you te—"

"As senior prin—"

"Don't care! Tell me now!"

---

"So... you're going to be shaking the hooves of anypony that comes to the Gala?" Sapphire asked as she and Celestia were walking towards the front entrance to the castle, with them only wearing the regalia. It had been two weeks since the party at Ponyville, in which Sapphire devoted much of her attention on learning more on how to be a princess. This was largely due to a feeling of needing to do something that matters, which was reinforced by the training memories that Luna was able to help her recover. However, the memories ended up being mainly about physical conditioning, along with dodging regimes for her filly life. It appeared that she was willing to tough it out as a filly, so Sapphire thought that maybe she should tough it out with learning how to be a princess. Even if she had some other plans in mind besides what Celestia might hope for.

"Yes, though you don't have to do that since you're only here to meet the nobles from other cities," Celestia explained. It was planned that Sapphire would attend the gala to get a chance to meet and learn about some of the nobles from the other cities, along with any other important ponies like the Wonderbolts.

"That alone is enough to cause me to have a headache, especially based on the likes of Blueblood and the nobles he surrounds himself with," Sapphire stated as she shivered at the memory of hosting a garden party with some nobles on Celestia's request.

"Oh, don't be like that. There are honestly some nobles that are far better than the likes you spoke of. You just need to find those that have good intentions while spotting the ones that simply see you as a pawn in their machinations," Celestia admitted, pausing as she looked at entranceway with a look of suffering and slight hope.

"Okay... well then, I'll be over here," Sapphire replied as she walked over to the room where the buffet would be located before pausing as she heard some ponies outside singing. "What is going... no. Just no," Sapphire said after glancing out the window, where she saw that there were ponies singing and dancing outside. "Sometimes, I wonder if there is something going on that is making everypony crazy."

---

"And that's when Duchess Golden Fleece stumbled and spilled her glass of wine onto her personal servant!" exclaimed Baron Emerald Mine, laughing as the other nobles laughed in such a fashion that caused Sapphire to wonder if all of this was rehearsed. The Gala was in full swing, and all of the nobles that weren't tied up with the waiting line to shake Celestia's hoof were swarming around Sapphire. However, Baroness Silver Clock was keeping her distance, simply sipping a glass of wine as she kept her eyes on the group.

Sapphire herself was poking a fork into some kind of noble dish that she forgot the name of, mainly due to her losing her appetite for the moment. "Yes, Baron Emerald, that is a fascinating story," Sapphire dryly said, feeling like her brain was starting to go on automatic as she followed her lessons on etiquette. Inwardly, Sapphire was screaming in horror, wondering how Celestia could even handle this many nobles at once. The current amount that surrounded her was four times greater than the garden parties that she went to, where they would eventually run out of their 'stories' to discuss, or the mocking of those ‘lesser ponies’ that tempted Sapphire to grind her teeth into oblivion.

Sadly, even the Elements that she saw earlier weren't able to help her out, as she saw that Applejack was busy outside tending to some snack cart for some reason while Rainbow was pulling some kind of stunt to attract the Wonderbolts' attention. Even Rarity didn't interact with her. Instead, she simply followed Blueblood around for some reason that made Sapphire wonder how she could even stand the stallion. Maybe I should ask her for her secret, then maybe Blueblood wouldn't get on my nerves, Sapphire thought to herself with a forlorn sigh as another noble started to recount another 'funny story'.

However, he was interrupted as Sapphire heard a door slamming open as a voice that sounded like Fluttershy's screamed out, "You will love me!"

"What is going on?" Sapphire said as she turned her attention towards the origin of the scream, only to widen her eyes as she saw a horde of animals rushing into the room, causing ponies to panic as they started to run around while yelling their heads off. Even the herd of nobles that were around Sapphire scattered in terror, some of them commenting on how they didn't want the filthy animals touching their clothes. Seeing that the mass of animals just consisted of terrified animals, Sapphire simply shielded the buffet tables with a barrier of water, watching the scene unfold before her. "Finally, some fun at last."

"You think this is fun, princess?" asked Silver from Sapphire's right side, causing her to jump back in shock.

"Where the buck did you come from?!" Sapphire asked, her eyes darting around as she saw that the other nobles were already fleeing the room, just leaving Silver and her along with the animals that were running outside the barrier.

"I simply walked over to you since I knew that you wouldn't be harmed so easily. I just thought it would be safer to be with you than trying to outrun everypony else," Silver answered.

Taking a dish, Sapphire replied, "Good thinking... sounds like you know me better than the other nobles," before she started to stuff her mouth with the food.

Shivering a bit in disgust at Sapphire's eating habits, Silver responded, "Indeed. After seeing how you acted when you visited Vanhoover, and we would like to have you visit us again."

There we go, Sapphire thought as she moved onto some of the desserts for the time being. However, when Silver didn't add anything, Sapphire looked at her as she asked, "Is that all you got to say?"

"Personally, I have several other things to say, but I know that you're not the kind of mare to even try to listen to them. Instead, I'm just saying that we would welcome you with open forelegs since quite a number of ponies were enamored by your actions while on my ship," Silver answered.

Staring at Silver for a moment, Sapphire recalled that while she was busy with the trips and what not when she visited, nopony wasn't all the overbearing in the first place. Furthermore, Vanhoover was on the outskirts of Equestria with the only settlement nearby being Tall Tale, which could mean fewer nobles to hound her overall. In comparison, the eastern cities were too close to one another while Applewood had the nearby Los Pegasus, which would draw in quite the tourist crowd. "Yeah... I might pay it another visit," Sapphire finally stated, before looking at all the wild animals running around. "...As long as I don't have anypony or anything ruining my food," Sapphire then commented as Silver simply nodded as they watched the Royal Guard finally pouring into the room to clear out the animals, only to mixed success. Turned out, their helmets had an issue when facing a bird with a particularly tough beak to hammer into one's helmet.

Comments

[Lady Lightning Strike]

Turned out that helmets are an issue when facing a bird with a particularly tough beak to hammer into one's helmet.

How many Royal Guard helmets could a wood chuck chuck?

Dang. It ain't a tongue twister.

[Pause]

To be honest, I don't even find myself hating Celestia or the nobles anymore (I really didn't from the start).

You're laying it on so thick with how much they're to be unlikable that I kind of just roll my eyes at it every time something happens with them.

[Greatazuredragon]

Sapphire herself was poking a fork into some kind of noble dish that she forgot the name of, due to losing her appetite for the moment.

The Princess of Food losing her appetite? Things are certainly dire!

Even the herd of nobles that were around Sapphire scattered in terror, some of them commenting on how they didn't want the filthy animals touching their clothes. Seeing that the mass of animals just consisted of terrified animals, Sapphire simply shielded the buffet tables with a barrier of water, watching the scene unfold before her.

No wait, she's back to normal.

[Asolem2]

Fortunately, Runic's examination of you revealed quite a bit about your Earth Pony traits, so I know the best way to start this lesson for you."

"What do you me—what are you doing with that big ha—Gah!"

Heh

"This Steel Coat, if I have the name right... I find this mare's method of training to be quite favorable," Luna declared, causing Sapphire to stare at her in shock.

"She hit me, when I was a filly, with a hammer, Luna..." Sapphire croaked out, only for Luna to wrap a foreleg around her shoulder.

And it was effective, you have managed to ignore quite a bit of physical abuse with no real complaints during the course of this series

Blueblood started to say, as Sapphire resisted the urge to groan and throw Blueblood out the nearest window.

Don't resist it Sapphire, throw him out

Though, Baroness Silver Clock was keeping her distance, simply sipping a glass of wine as she kept her eyes on the group.

"I simply walked over to you, since I know that you wouldn't be harmed so easily, so its safer to be with you than trying to outrun everypony else," Silver answered.

She understands Sapphire a lot better these days

Sapphire simply shielded the buffet tables with a barrier of water, watching the scene unfold before her. "Finally, some fun at last."

At least she has her priorities straight

[Auxiliary Nexus]

Inb4 Sapphire gets shipped with Blueblood. Totally gonna happen.

[Canary In The Coal Mine]

I just read the original story and this one, catching up with this recent chapter release. I quite enjoy the protagonist and her struggles, though I'm not quite sure how to consider the Princesses and their plotting.

[Kevin Lee]

*and in another reality*

Aether: "Why do I suddenly have this urge to find a way to blend water spells, hammers, and rabid squirrels into an effective device to use on Celestia...? "

[FullMoon]

8754591
Train squirrels to adorn armor plates made of water while wielding a hammer made of heavily condensed water that explodes with water pressure on impact

[Golden Fang Ryu Shenron]

Tilting her head slightly, Cadance answered, "I'm twenty-seven, why you'd ask? And to inform you, it's improper to ask a mare about her age."

Sapphire is a mare took Cadence. Plus she’s like, six years older than you.