• Member Since 2nd Jun, 2012
  • offline last seen Nov 13th, 2013

Midnight Magician


(A psychological drama) Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie have done it, they pranked Fluttershy. They went too far and caused a horrible accident to occur, leaving Fluttershy with a head injury. Now she's seeing an odd shadow that nopony else can see. The shadow pony wants to help Fluttershy get revenge, by pranking them back. But Fluttershy will quickly learn that the shadow wants more than to just "prank." And what happens when Fluttershy begins to realize that the shadowy figure is not as she seems?

Chapters (2)
Comments ( 19 )

I really hope you all enjoy this, I put quite a bit of thought into it. I wrote this at about 3 am.. So you know, maybe some errors here and there. Thanks for reading! :rainbowwild:

This looks really interesting! Unfortunatly, have no time to read it now, but I will edit this comment when I have read it! :rainbowwild:

This looks cool, excited to read it when I can:pinkiesmile:

Edit: First chapter is aweeesoommmeeeee

Scapegoat (noun) - a person or group made to bear the blame for others or to suffer in their place.

I really enjoyed this. good piece of writing good sir. :pinkiehappy:

The text felt a little bit "mashed up", especially when it came to the dialouges.

Other than that, it was an enjoyable read. Have a thumb up!

To anybody else who reads this, I've fixed a lot of errors in the writing. I no longer have multiple speakers in one paragraph, so the dialogue should be much easier to follow. Also, a few minor mistakes that could detract from the reading. Hope you enjoy the improved version of this story.

I have three things to say.

1: This was awesome!

2: " Darling, these hooves were made for walking, and that's just what they s hould do!" Did you mean to derive that from the song?

3: This could be promising of a truly epic sequel. I want to see Pinkie get what she deserves as well! :scootangel:

MOAR :heart::heart::heart:


1. Thanks! I'm glad you think so! :pinkiehappy:

2. Yeah, haha! I did borrow that from the song. It had been stuck in my head for a long while, thanks to this weird commercial that kept replaying...trying to sell boots or something?

3. A sequel, eh? I don't really know how I'd do that... Maybe you could give me some ideas or advice? Always appreciated! :rainbowkiss:

By the way, I love your avatar! :twilightsmile:

Thanks! I enjoyed drawing that! (Well, I didn't draw her, but I colored it in all evil-like.)

Hmm...a sequel idea...maybe Fluttershy's feelings come back full force somehow, releasing the shadow pony again. And they want revenge. MUAHAHAHA!!! :pinkiecrazy:
Oh. Sorry. Anyway, I think that maybe the pony could be taking control of Fluttershy, trying to hurt the rest of the six, meanwhile forcing Flutters into a deep pit of depression, as she is blaming herself for her friends' suffering.
Yeah, I'm not too great at making ideas for other's stories. That, and I'm half asleep. :facehoof:

Once more, the memore faded and was replaced with a new one.


Fluutershy jumped up onto her hooves and raced out of the hospital towards her cottage....

Fluutershy, eh?

A final mention... I think you should put less exclamation marks in your story, and keep those exclamation marks (when you do have them) in your dialogue.

Aside from those few nit-picks, I really, really enjoyed the story! The end weakened the experience a bit for me, especially since it was positioned after a very strong body, but all in all... thumbs up.

It's nice to see a good Psychological Grimdark on Fim... I though I was the only one who wrote that sort of stuff!


Just wow. That was awesome! So angst-y too, almost every second I was like "le gasp!" :pinkiegasp: Crazy Fluttershy is awesome! :flutterrage:

I liked it but one thing, Angel is a guy, not a girl. Says so on the Wiki.

X-Rays do not scan brains, she would have to have an MRI or a Catscan.

Plxzwork1122 yes I also noticed that!
Finally someone else who understands!

Login or register to comment