Once Smitten, Twice Fluttershy

by MidnightShadowOC

The Beginning

Chapter 1: The Beginning

I fear as though a new revolution is at hand now that a portal from another dimension has opened. Now that I have been left with the task of caring for Fluttershy. I stepped outside my house, 315 Clarindale Road, on a breezy summer morning, my cinnamon colored hair flowing in the breeze. A shadow was cast at my feet, but no body of any sort to be seen. I looked to the left, right, across the street, and finally, up. A yellow body hovered above the shadow, wings flapping. A pink mane and tail grew from the head and rear end of the creature. Three butterflies decorated each hip. I’ve seen this somewhere before... I thought. The pegasus had come down to Earth, but made no eye contact. Her mane covered one eye as she looked nowhere near my face, focusing more on the ground. It finally hit me. Friendship is Magic! The portal that had been opened was into the dimension of Equestria! “Fluttershy...?” I called out quietly. The pony raised her head. She whimpered something that most people wouldn’t understand, but I know that it was supposed to be a, “Hello...” I reached my hand out, awaiting a reaction. However, when she noticed the cut on my hand from a few days ago, she said, "Oh, what happened?" While focused on the wound, she nuzzled my hand. "Oh, that?" I inquired. "It's just a small cut from tending to my garden. Rose bushes and all that junk." I shrugged. Fluttershy walked inside, trying to locate my box of bandages. I went into my room and got it out. The walls were a brilliant blue, my bed spread a metallic red. I placed the box on the carpet, which was a bedazzling green, and watched as the pony took the lid off, and gently placed a band-aid on my cut. "Fluttershy, I think this is the start of something amazing." I said, giving her a gentle hug. I could feel her hooves wrapping around my body gently, hear her breathing as we sat there on the floor in utter silence. We walked over to my neighbor, who also happens to be my best friend, and noticed that she, too, had received one of the ponies. "Hey, Amber? Ya home?" I said, knocking on the door. Amber came and opened the door. She was about the same height as I was. She had bleach blonde hair and the prettiest hazel eyes. "Oh, hey Sarah. What's up?" The pony she had received was a white unicorn with curled purple locks. Rarity. "I see you've gotten one too." I said, with a nod towards Rarity. "Yep." Amber smiled. "She's been helping with my wardrobe." The mare stepped aside to reveal a chair with clothes only Rarity would accept laying on it. "My own work," said the unicorn mare, levitating a pair of shorts with expertly trimmed hems. "Oh, Rarity. That's lovely." Complimented Fluttershy. "Thank you, my dear!" Grinned Rarity. Fluttershy's wings opened, and she hovered in the air above Amber's house, entranced by a dove that had made a nest in a nearby tree. Amber and I talked while the pegasus watched the bird timidly, and the unicorn looked through Amber's closet again. She emerged minutes later with a plain green top in her view. "Darling, you asolutely must add a pattern on to this! Allow me to get my needle and thread!" And with that, she was off. "I should probably go." I smiled. "Fluttershy, time to go." I called. "Have fun with your patterns." I waved to Amber. "Later, Sarah!" She called after me. Back home, I decided that Fluttershy should sleep in my room, just in case. "Would you rather sleep on the bed with me, or have a bed on the floor?" I quizzed the mare. "Oh, a bed on the floor is fine." She responded. I went out into the garage and found the comfiest - and least dirty - blanket I could. I strategically placed it down and made a bed for the pegasus, and placed a pillow on the end nearest to my bed. This way, if she felt scared, she could climb into my bed. I explained this all to her. "If you ever are having nightmares or just feel scared, don't hesitate to climb into my bed." I said, placing down another blanket to use as covers. She stepped onto it and lay down. "It's very cozy!" She said, snuggling into the pillow. "Are you hungry at all?" I asked her. "Well, I am a little bit hungry." She shyly smiled. I went to retrieve some food for her. I searched through the fridge and got out an apple for the pony. When I returned to my room I found that the pegasus was snuggled under the blankets. I sat on my bed and placed the apple next to hers. Fluttershy had closed her eyes and fallen asleep. I walked outside and down to the store. While I was there, I got a brush for her and, since mine had broken, a brush for myself. The brush I had gotten for Fluttershy had butterflies on it, just like her cutie mark. Mine, however, had a lightning bolt on it. As I was returning, I passed Amber and Rarity on the streets. Rarity had her saddlebags on, and Amber had her tote bag, like I did. "Going to the market?" I said. "Yep. Rarity's out of fabric." Amber replied. Rarity grinned. "I take it you're just returning?" Asked the mare, looking at my tote. "Yes indeedy. Thought it'd be a good idea to get a brush for Fluttershy." I replied. Suddenly remembering that I had borrowed one of Amber's bobby pins, I said, "Oh, before I start walking again, here's your bobby pin back, Amber." I smiled, handing the pin to the blonde. "Bye, now!" I said, sing-song, and started walking again. Once back at the house, I put the two brushes in the washroom, and went back to reading Airhead.

Comments

[swedely]

I'm gonna be frank, this is pretty rough. The main problem is organization. You need to seperate your paragraphs and don't be afraid to go more indepth with detail to story. How did the portal get there? Why are ponies suddenly coming out of it? I'm not trying to put you down, I'm just trying to help you grow as a writer.

[Hivemind]

Trust me when I say that it is best to take your time with your stories. Your readers can wait.

[Fluttershyizdabest]

Dammit, you stole my title.

[MidnightShadowOC]

804774
I'll keep that in mind, thank you.

[RandomEncounter]

Needs revising and paragraphs.
When to Make a New Paragraph

[Dewvoltage]

Now I thought this was great. Keep going with the chapters! I'm one of the people from Canterlot.net's Cantercast and I read Fimfics a lot and this one got my attention by a lot. I'll mention it on the next episode. Thank you!

[Relevant Heavy Metal]

Once Bitten Twice Shy - Great White