Life is going well for Gordon. Two years ago he won the jackpot on the lottery and decided to build his dream home in the Yorkshire countryside. 6 months after moving in, he wakes up one day and realises that either the hills have moved, or he has.
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Spike that is a tough question with a painful history for a lot of people
Wait how did shinning get there is the Shinning that ducked Cadence a changing something brave it happened right after shinning was out in a cell
Uh oh, who is with candence then?
Love how you also included their own House of Commons. Wished the US Congress was the same, but the truth is painfully obvious when you dig deeper and find that both parties are being financed by the elite.
Also gotta love Griffin Jeremy Corbyn.
Now I can’t say much about the Indonesian Military since I never served, but I did hear that superiors would include beating the recruits physically as punishment as well as humiliating them.
So not too different. That is...aside from the Boomer Generals wearing Rolex watches and driving Rolls Royces because they were receiving bribes from foreign companies and governments.
Go ahead. Take a look at the Indonesian Military’s inventory. See those M113s and M109A4-BEs from Belgium? Yeah we didn’t need those, but bribes to a few Boomer Generals and politicians got those vehicles shipped. Oh yeah, and that’s just ONE example. Same for the Air Force and the Navy.
Yes I specifically pointed out the politicians and high-ranking officers who are boomers because they are remnants of the Suharto regime. Still using old tactics, doctrines, and refuse any change. It took a fuck long time to finally convince them getting UCAVs. Fuck boomers.
It lives!
Is this Star Trek reference? The Vulcans talked like that in the original series.
your
bellend?
‘I have an extensive (...)’
Lowercase i should be uppercase.
he?
I will come back for the rest at a later time.
Changelings.
Love the Die Hard bit.
Is it me or was that Sergeant on a massive power trip?
i.imgflip.com/2qerll.jpg
EDIT: Part 1 here: 10214856
Part 2 of potential errors:
Not sure what the proper word here is, but I do not think it is ‘becoming’.
have?
well-dressed?
let alone have one speakto me."
Missing space.
were
them?
OUT
Lowercase B should be uppercase.
Highly possible that that is correct, but I am not sure.
Griffons?
here
books
Lowercase Y should be uppercase.
The comma seems unnecessary.
Norwegian
‘‘rather than’’?
The ‘of any kind’ seems a little redundant.
Shining
10216673
His serial number is an easter egg.
10216763
I can understand being nitpicky about grammar and such if your being paid for your writing, but since authors like us dont, there isn't a reason to do so. It doesn't affect the story much and your criticism is unnecessary. As a aside, I dont pay much attention to someone who hasn't published a story themselves.
So if I remember right, Rainbow still isn’t aware of what Celestia did in past. I’m hoping once it all comes to light, she finds herself further separated from the bearers. These chain of events all started because she couldn’t face the idea that Star Swirl was a genocidal misanthropic pony. She swept it all under the rug because it was more convenient, now it’s coming to bite her on the rump. Please don’t have this be another story where she gets off scot free despite her genocidal actions. Thought I’m curious about what sort of unexpected ramifications her actions could have.
10217099
Further I hope the Equestrian Nobility is placed in hot water, I can’t imagine their lies being popular with the commoners. Who likely already have an axe to grind against them.
10216909
FYI: The ‘nitpicking’ only starts at ‘‘Part 2 of potential errors’’
EDIT: I believe that I should clarify that Part 1 is this comment:
10214856
Not sure if ref fluttershy or this
....well shit we got an imposter shining armor possibly changelings. Very enjoyable so far and can’t wait to see more. I feel like shit is about to hit the fan hard in these coming chapters.
I wonder if Gordons father was the skull in the dungeon torture chamber ? I was expecting Rainbow to meet Gilda again. In some stories, Gilda is in some way, connected to Gryphon royalty.
Kick the shit out of the people who work for you then wonder why they have phycological problems. Seems just like the military.
Wait. Hold the fuck up...... HIS DAD ENDED UP IN EQUESTRIA?!
Ooooohhh shit this ain't good