Colloquium
"It truly is a lovely night, princess."
"Mmm. Indeed, it is. Then again, my sister has always been quite the artist."
"I don't know how she did it. Billions of stars, the entire sky--and she filled its entire expanse. If I'm not mistaken, then I'd say we're right under Monoceros, Canis Minor... And, ooh! There's Gemini right there!"
"Still as adamant about the cosmos as ever, are we, Twilight?"
"Of course. You remember when I was a filly; all the mornings you found me passed out underneath the castle's main telescope, using my sketchbook of poorly-drawn constellations as a pillow."
"Or all of the nights I caught you in the process of attempting to sneak into the observatory. At the time, your constant habit of staying up until the crack of dawn became somewhat infamous within the guards. And, if truth be told, I may or may not have allowed you get away with it once or twice."
"How scandalous, princess!"
"Haha. All for the greater good, in the end. I like to think that ponies who share your vast appreciation for the night was what my sister truly wanted."
"It's hard to think that something so observed and studied used to be so feared. It seems almost silly, to be honest."
"Times were much different back then. My subjects thought of the sun as their only source of life; it provided warmth, the crops would flourish. They even went as far as to consider it their creator, equating it with strength and prosperity."
"And the moon? What did they equate that to? I feel like I know the answer, but hearing it from you is... fascinating, since you were there and all."
"They considered the moon an enemy, of sorts. Superstition and the paranormal were, unfortunately, rather popular concepts which caused them to project their fear towards what summoned darkness. Naturally, they branded the moon as a root of evil and it ended up symbolizing the unknown. But when one is as aged as I am, a little habit forms that forces an endless amount of inquiry about the world; something I know you happen to be familiar with, my student."
"Heh. What can I say? I learned from the best."
"You flatter me."
"What about these 'endless inquiries?' What exactly were they?"
"I would tell you, but I'm afraid you may think me a bit of a nut."
"What? No, never! Remember who you're talking to, princess; I'm the one who put an entire town in jeopardy just because I was going to be tardy. Plus, you've done so much for me, I honestly don't think anything could tarnish your image in my eyes."
"More flattery? Very well, then. I'll let you in on the gist of it: the sun is the evil one, not the moon."
"... Okay, now you have to tell me."
"I've never told a soul. Not even Luna; although, I think the prospect would greatly amuse her, don't you think?"
"I think she and I would be tied on the amusement-meter right about now."
"Would it bother you if I continued to keep it to myself?"
"Yes!--I mean, maybe a little. Uhm, what ever would be better for you, of course."
"Then again, who can I trust, if not my faithful student?"
"Ha. Now who's using flattery?"
"Fair enough. I'll tell you, but on one condition."
"Anything."
"This does not leave either of us. If anypony found out, I'm certain it would be skewed out of proportion and the consequences would be fairly... unpleasant. It's a considerably unconventional point of view, after all. I'm sure it would be met with a bit of resistance from minds not quite as open as yours."
"I wouldn't dream of it, princess."
"Thank you, Twilight."
"I'm all ears."
"As I said, darkness is associated with the unknown. Fear. Mystery. We feel vulnerable when the night renders us blind, open to anything that may lurk in the shadows. It is that specific type of vulnerability that is perceived as a threat; the thought that something may be right behind you, but you would be so cripplingly unaware because it manipulates the role of darkness and uses it as a cloak. No doubt, quite the frightening scenario."
"Uhm, just a little."
"Then, the sun would rise and shroud the land in its light. Comfort. Safety. Familiarity. But, most of all, awareness."
"I think I know where you're headed with this... The weakness and vulnerability disappear and, somehow, confidence and strength returns with the sun. Most threats would vanish, allowing them to prosper during the day. Obviously, the light would be praised and the darkness would be condemned. Sounds to me like the more primitive ponies of the past were on a power-trip and disparaged the night just because they thought it was stronger than them."
"Precisely. I'm more than glad to see you haven't lost your touch."
"Old habits die hard. Please, please, continue."
"Ahh, yes. As I was saying, little did they know, the sun was far more malicious than the moon. Light is aggressive; it can burn down entire kingdoms, it can scorch the eyes, it seers through flesh. The sun consumes almost everything it touches, leaving nothing in its wake."
"I-I've never heard it put like that..."
"The moon is passive. Darkness is the neutral state of the world and it merely exists without trying to. Gentle. Harmless, even. It does not wish to control or dominate; it just is. When you look at something against the night sky, it seems pure, almost flawless; but turn the light on and all of the ugly bubbles to the surface. It makes things appear dirty, every fault brought to attention. What is done by the moon is so free and careless but, by the morning, regret trickles in."
"I'm speechless, princess."
"All of these claims that darkness and the night are a means for fear and malevolence, but the true evil is right before their eyes. Tell me, Twilight, where does the genesis of life begin?"
"Is this a trick question?"
"No, no, not at all. Where does a potential new life start to take shape and form?"
"In the womb?..."
"Exactly. And tell me what the womb consists of?"
"Well, it's supposed to be placid, comforting, and... dark?"
"Very good."
"So, darkness is almost like motherhood and fertility... Which should be associated with comfort!"
"You never disappoint me. But, as you can imagine, this epiphany has caused me more guilt than I thought was ever possible."
"Don't you think you're being a little too hard on yourself? The sun and its light are still a primary source of life and it provides the means for countless necessities. Plus, light and darkness can't survive without each other; it's a perfect balance."
"Oh, of course. This whole thing is perhaps a bit far-fetched and uncharacteristically cynical of me but, regardless, I place the blame on myself. However, riddle me this: why do we close our eyes and embrace the darkness when we sleep? When we hope? When we make love? Whe- Twilight, are you okay? That was quite the shiver you just had."
"Huh? I, uhh shiver, cold, yea-- I mean, yes, I'm okay."
"I apologize. Did that make you uncomfortable?"
"No, no, no! I'm just... not used to... that. From you.
"Ahh. I merely figured that we were both adults here, and no subject would necessarily be considered taboo."
"You're right, you're right. I'm sorry for kinda freaking out about that."
"You have nothing to apologize for. I'm the one who should be sorry for unloading my baggage onto you. That was inconsiderate of me."
"No need to be sorry. I enjoyed it a lot, actually. In fact, I feel honored that you chose me to confide in."
"To be honest, Twilight, I don't have many options."
"Oh-..."
"But don't allow that to deceive you. I truly wouldn't have it any other way."
"Thank you, princess. It's rea-"
"Please, my student. You of all ponies should be the one allowed to call me Celestia."
"Erm. If you're sure."
"Of course, of course. I insist."
"Well, uhm, Celestia, I was just saying that this really means a lot to me. It's... nice, being here alone with you. Sort of feels like it used to be when I was living here; except now I'm not dropping orbs because I was too weak or accidentally making spells backfire."
"I've missed you around here, Twilight."
"I miss you too."
"I have to admit, it gets almost unbearably lonely now, even with my sister returned. But what was that rule I used to hear fillies say about friends? That family doesn't count? Ha, yes, that was it."
"Oh, I know that one. I used to get made fun of because Shining and I were so close."
"That's nothing to be ashamed of. Your brother is a remarkable stallion; he would give his life for this kingdom without a second thought."
"...Would you?"
"There are a select few things I would die for."
"Like what?"
"My country, of course. Luna. Love. You."
"Me?!"
"I did say 'love,' didn't I?"
"Uh, yes. Yes, you did say that. But me?
"You didn't think I would be without love for my star pupil, did you? Of course I love you."
"I k-knew that. Love? Uhm..."
"My, you look as if you had just seen a ghost."
"I'm okay, I'm okay. Really. Sorry, again."
"I'm afraid I have to take partial blame for your naturally heightened anxiety. Maybe if you hadn't been raised under the wing of a princess, you would be less prone to nervousness."
"Ha. But then I wouldn't have been such a punctual student."
"Ahh, this is true. To shed light on the matter, it's rather... charming."
"Prin- Celestia, are you, uhm, feeling okay?"
"I'm feeling fine. Why do you ask?"
"Oh, no reason. Just wondering."
"Am I acting peculiar?"
"No... Okay, maybe a little. If you ever need to talk, you know, I'm-"
"Forgive me, Twilight. I can't lie to you."
"Oh? Then what's the matter? Is everything all right?"
"This time, it's crucial to keep what's ailing me locked away. I'm sorry."
"I completely understand if you can't tell m-"
"However..."
"However?"
"Call it the infamous 'vulnerability of the night,' if you will. I'll make an exception, since I've been unabashedly honest with you."
"I'll listen to whatever you have to say, and it remains between us."
"Thank you, Twilight. I've... I've been doing an almost unhealthy amount of thinking lately, about matters of the heart."
"Like, love? Romance? I never, well... I never took you for the type."
"Yes, love and perhaps romance. I've also been thinking about something much deeper, much more substantial...Something that means most everything to me."
"Which is?"
"Our connection."
"Our what now?!"
"Our connection. We have a mutual trust for each other that one can hardly dream about, let alone comprehend. You've been so much more to me than a mere student, or protege, or friend. In the short years since we've known each other, you've turned into my single constant in a perpetually changing world, my comforting darkness. I'm eternally sorry if this tears you away from me."
"Celestia, what are you trying to s-"
"I meant what I said, Twilight. I do love you."
"Heh. Guess it's just that vulnerability of the night, right?"
"Yes, that would be it."
"That's... this is a lot to take in, princess."
"I'm aware of this, and I apolog-"
"But since you've been 'unabashedly' honest..."
"Yes?..."
"I... Ugh, this is extremely hard to say... I've never done this before."
"I understand completely. I'll arrange a chariot so you can return to Ponyv-"
"I l-love you too, Celestia."
"Let's go back inside, Twilight."
Very sweet. Though I'm not usually crazy about floating dialogue, the minimal approach here is nice. Good job!
I loved it.
I know, not a very interesting review, but it's all I can really say.
All of my d'awwws. And with only dialogue too!
loved it!
This is complete?
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I find it cute and sweet, but the only dialog idea, kind of confused me in the start, but you used it very good.
Make a sequel. Nao
Short and sweet, a good change from time to time is always good.
I liked it....
That said, I one posted a story very much like this and it got rejected because it was 'dialogue only' so I'm kind of wondering what the rule is exactly.
720562
They reject stories if they're dialogues like:
Twilight: Hello
Rarity: Hi, darling.
Etc.
You get the idea.
720622
My story was 'like this' other characters yes, but almost the same.
Heavy.. Wants
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Sequel?
Oh my God this was awesome!
That moment when your one shot suddenly demands a sequel.... tantalising, no?
Good read, I liked it
I can always go for a good twilightXcelestia
Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmm...
721000 this got featured.
*Sheds manly tear*
That was beautiful
I've never read a story consisting of only dialogue before...and I must say my very first was not a disappointment of any length. Thank you for this, it's literally exactly what I wanted to read.
Also, This guy here knows what he's talking about. 720375
721043 Thats the point
I can't say I'm a fan of the style. I think any physicalization, even just Twilight leaning closer as Celestia draped a wing over her as they both stared into the starry night, would have made this story stronger. Right now, this feels more like a script than a story; it's only missing the proper formatting to be one.
Still, it's always nice to see more Twilestia.
Great approach. Loved the pure dialogue. Very lovely read.
Well done: I liked the floating dialogue, it set a different mood than it would have in a traditional narration. Good on ya!
This can't be complete! Please do more!
Your style is different, kind of refreshing. I rather like it.
Interesting.
I'm not usually one for floating dialogue, but this was done really well. I did also find Celestia's response to Twilight's confession really quick, but maybe that's just me. Anyway, good job, keep going if you want.
"I've miss you around here." Typo, on a bit of a crucial line... just sayin'... bit of an EXTREMELY crucial line, actually...
The purely dialogue format worked, for the most part, but it felt...a little bland. Since WHAT they say delineates everything for the entire story, you need to be extremely considerate of what they say and how they say it. It felt too much like they were discussing philosophy across a public table and not having the heart to heart that it was. As it is, they sound too alike, and too formal.
I do like this, but I've had ordinary conversations that were at least as descriptively rich and subtle as this was.
Since you're going for a purist approach here, every single last word (all being subvocalized, naturally) has to be the perfectly right word, at the perfectly right pace and the perfectly right subtext.
I'd like to see further attempts at 100% dialogue stories , I think this is a nominally successful attempt.
Though I agree with the above comments, I have to say this is more than nominal.
This is amazing. It's heartfelt, it's sincere, it's a stunning rendition of a very emotional and private moment, and if you'd improve on it in the manner stated above, it would turn from amazing, to an instant classic.
I wanna see a re-do of this, in the hands of a capable editor. DO NOT DISSAPOINT ME.
"Let's go back inside, Twilight."
CLOP TIME!
Kidding.
Very nice little story. The floating dialogue was done well, it set a mood and expressed emotion quite well.
While the story and the sweet premise was all well and nice, I liked the conversation they had and Celestia's unconventional theory about the sun and moon. It was fun to read about and quite interesting, then again those topics always fascinate me
Great little story done really well, chalk it up as a success
Less than 2000 words, one chapter, shipping (TwiLestia).
OSQ never works on shipping.
721986 exactly what my pervy brain was thinking
That was super neat! I love it
And dialogue is not a story.
722266
I feel like there are certain things you can convey solely through dialogue, so I tried my hand at it. The author Nicholson Baker published a novel told only with dialogue and it turned out extremely interesting. It doesn't necessarily need to have a chronology of events to be substantial; emotions, psychology, and how people interact are fascinating in themselves. But, of course, that's just my opinion. Just a little creative liberty.
We MUST have MORE! Please?
722366
That there can be a story. Change in character, emotion and psychology can defiantly be a story in it's self.
Hahaha, I loved that ending! For some reason, I can never resist reading this ship - somehow, it always turns out awesome, whoever writes it. I loved the form of this fanfic - I've seen fic without dialogue, but never fics with nothing BUT dialogue, and I find it rather awesome. Lots of mustaches and a like!
I loved this
(Beautiful Pony of FimFiction,I Think you have wrote a wonderful story! I DEMAND MOAR!!!
I.. You sir, are just.. Words... Take ALL MY LIKES!!!
723402
I'm a ma'am. Haha, thank you! I'm glad you like it. :3
HEAVY DEMANDS A SEQUEL
That story was an adora-fest for me.
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Post a sequel or else....
722366
Ah of course. As I read it through (quickly though) I noticed that it wasn't so bad. There's just this one thing: FiMFiction is not for scripts, and this here's borderline stuff. Rules ain't created by me but I try to enforce 'em on my behalf (lame results so far though :P)
Usually just romance and less than 2000 words don't fit together. If you'd write "normally", this would've been nearing 5000 words with ease, as you have to express emotions, actions, reactions, facial expressions and so on.
Aww, this was nice. Simple, straight forward, sweet. You pulled the style pretty well.
The ending felt a little.. umm, something, though. Up until "But since you've been 'unabashedly' honest..." it was good, but then it just seems too short and with a loss of emotion and engagement. Maybe. I don't know I'm not a writer.
but we didn't get to hear the rest of the story celestia was telling she stopped when twilight shuddered at the part about making love and never got to finish her analogy.
My one and only complaint is the last line. That gave me the wrong vibe, and ruined the innocence for me. The whole last few sentences just felt sudden, as did the ending.
Other then that, this was very sweet. I love the dialouge-only way you wrote this. I'm normally not for Twilight/Celestia ships, but that was cute. :)
so many sweet emotions and i too must ask for a sequel
the dialogue idea was brilliant i hope to see more