Hearth's Warming Festivus

by FillyCheeseSteak

Chapter 2: Airing of Greivances

“So what's next?” Dash asked. “A flying competition?” She continued, her eyes lighting up.

“Well, that is where Celestia left off. However, it appears that Starswirl wrote that follows is an ‘airing of grievances’.” Twilight responded. From the enthusiastic looks in her friends’ eyes, she was then prompted to ask: “Who's up for it?”

Everypony nodded, and it appeared that they were all in agreement. The insanity would continue.

“Before we continue,” Rarity said. “I must ask; what is the pole for?”

Twilight donned a puzzled look on her face. “I've wondered that, too. Oh well. Princesses orders. Anyhow, who would like to start?”

“Ah’ would love to.” Applejack forcefully blurted out. “Rarity jus’ has to be less uptight, and put her friends before rich people.”

“Before you begin,” Twilight started before Rarity could blow off her hot steam. “You have to use the following format; ‘in the past year, you have disappointed me by, yadda yadda yadda.”

Rarity took action immediately after Twilight finished. “Well Applejack, in the past year, you have disappointed me by never donating to those who need it, and looking like a walking dump!”

Applejack was quick to fire back, now that the ball was in her court. “Ah’ can't donate what little ah’ have! And at least ah’ wear sumpthin’, instead of occasionally putting’ on fancy dresses!”

The rest of the gang clapped at the display of civilized fighting. Who knew that insanity could be so controlled?

“Us next!” Dash shouted, shoving a hoof towards Fluttershy.

“Actually, I think that me and Twili-” Fluttershy started, but was indefinitely cut off.

“Enough!” Rainbow Dash shouted, silencing the room, and causing Fluttershy to sulk into a corner in lip biting terror. “In the past year, you have disappointed me by not flying fast enough! And also, you need to be more charismatic! And get yourself out there! Find a colt! Settle down, for Celestia’s sake!” With the conclusion of her rant, the rainbow pegasus flopped onto her back in exhaustion.

“Oh, is she done?” Fluttershy quietly enquired. “In the past year, you have disappointed me by… Well, actually you were pretty nice.”

“Oh,” Rarity groaned, unfitting of the lady that she portrayed herself as. “Go at it! Finish her off!”

Fluttershy sank back into the corner and closed her eyes. “If anything," she quickly said. “You could be nicer to animals…”

“WHAT!” Rainbow Dash spit, fire burning in her eyes. “Those blue jays were in my way, so I carefully moved them away from danger!”

“My turn, my turn!” Pinkie said, bouncing up and down. “In the past year, you have disappointed me by not coming to my parties, not helping me cook, never letting me write any letters-”

“There was that one, wasn't there…” Twilight recalled. “Never mind.”

“And never helping me bathe Gummy!” She finished.

“You,” Twilight began. “in the past year, you have disappointed me by never helping me and Spike reshelve, or-”

“Speaking of him, where is my little Spiky-wikey?” Rarity wondered out loud.

“Fixing us a vegetarian meatloaf.” Twilight responded, face flat and devoid of any happy expression.

“Vegetarian meatloaf… How meta!” Rarity exclaimed.

“Shut up!” Twilight exploded. “Now, IF I MAY, you have never made matters better, just worse. That's about it, though. But hey, that was a new experience, eh?” Twilight *cough canadian cough* Sparkle finished. “Now who's hungry?” she asked.

“Ooh, ooh, I am!” Pinkie screamed.

“We knew that,” Rainbow Dash said.

“How's it going, Spike? Twilight called out to her scaley friend.

“Hold up, I have never seen an over glow like this befo-”

The explosion that followed was big.
Like really big.
Like deserving of another one of those episodes where they rebuild it big.
In other words, cliche.

Comments

[Hairy Konquerer]

Oh please continue this, I'm all ears.